Right Here, Right Now

by Georgia Beers

  * * *

  The next couple of weeks were a whirlwind for me. I’d never been with anybody who was simultaneously so opposite from me and such a ridiculous turn-on that I could barely look at her without picturing her naked.

  Working in adjacent offices proved to be interesting. By unspoken agreement, we’d been keeping our relationship under wraps. I can only speak for myself when I say that I had no idea where things were going, so I was hesitant to share details with others until I had a better handle on it all. Alicia seemed okay with that, as she never mentioned it in any detail. Still, I think people had their suspicions. And why wouldn’t they? I don’t think we were exactly subtle about it.

  Alicia would come over under the pretense of bringing a treat for Leo; that’s what she’d tell Mary. Then, more often than not, she’d come into my inner office, shut the door behind her, cross the room to me, grab my face, and kiss me until I could barely focus. I’m sure Mary noticed more than once when Alicia left with a self-satisfied smile on her face and I had trouble forming words for the next five or ten minutes.

  I couldn’t do the same thing to her, as her office was completely open, but that didn’t mean I didn’t stop by. I’d pretend to want a slice of the god-awful Hawaiian pizza the staff had apparently fallen in love with. I’d go looking for my bathroom key, which Alicia would purposely keep so I’d have to come get it, even though her own bathroom was now functional. I’d bring Leo over so he could help the staff brainstorm. Each time, all I wanted was a few minutes to look at her, to feast my eyes on her body, to take in the day’s outfit, to gaze at her face, her hair, that mouth. I stared at her hands all the time—once, I’m sure Gisele caught me, and she gave me a conspiratorial smile that I wasn’t sure how to respond to.

  We didn’t spend all our time together. We were both busy. Alicia did a lot of schmoozing of potential new clients, which meant she was often busy for happy hour or dinner or both. I hadn’t been to her place, but she came to mine two or three times a week, and when she did…My God. The sex. There were no words to accurately describe the sex.

  I can honestly say that I’ve never been so completely attracted to, so sexually satisfied with, or so endlessly turned on by a person in my entire life. Everything Alicia did to my body, every touch, every kiss, every position…it all worked amazingly well. In fact, it almost frightened me a little bit just how perfect we were in bed. I realized it was probably a good thing we didn’t spend every night together. We’d never sleep.

  It was the last day in April, a Wednesday, and we were in my kitchen, Alicia standing behind me, her chin on my shoulder while I stirred the risotto.

  “Pretty labor intensive,” she observed.

  “Totally worth it,” I replied, ladling another scoop of broth into the rice. I turned to meet her eyes. “Promise.” I meant the kiss to be a quick peck, but Alicia’s fingers captured my chin and held it while she deepened things easily. I finally pulled away with a quiet chuckle. “Stop it. You’re going to make me burn dinner.” The pork was resting on the counter behind us. As soon as I finished with the risotto, we could eat.

  “Sorry,” she said with a kiss to my temple, then went back to her previous position, arms wrapped around my middle, chin on my shoulder. “Oh, I wanted to mention something.”

  Her lips were very close to my ear, and her voice sent a pleasant shudder down my spine. “What?”

  She pressed her body tighter against mine, her front to my back. “That thing you did with your mouth the other night? Yeah, I’m gonna need you to do that again in the very near future.”

  My spoon went still in the pot, and I was pretty sure I stopped breathing for a beat or two. I swallowed hard, audibly, as I recalled the moment she referred to. A couple nights ago. The orgasm I brought her to had been…vocal. Very vocal. Which was unlike her and also awesome. I turned to meet her gaze. “I think that could be arranged.”

  “Yeah? That is fantastic news.” Alicia kissed me again, but this time, it was a peck. “Should I open the wine now?”

  “Yes, please,” I said, relieved to see my risotto hadn’t stuck to the pot and also relieved to have her body away from me for a little bit. Well, not relieved, because I’d have loved to have her body right next to me twenty-four hours a day. But in that moment, if she’d stayed that close to me any longer, dinner would’ve fallen by the wayside as other things took over my attention.

  A few minutes later, we sat down to eat. Leo was perched politely at Alicia’s feet, obviously understanding where his chances for scraps were better. We touched our wineglasses together in a toast, then dug in.

  “Hey, have you ever seen Wicked?” I asked, then took a bite of my outstanding (if I did say so myself) risotto.

  “The show? Onstage? Nope.” Alicia shook her head.

  “Good. Because it’s awesome, and I have tickets.”

  “Oh?”

  I sipped my wine, then said, “Yeah, I have season tickets at the Academy. I have for a couple years, so I see a lot of shows. Sometimes I take my mom. Sometimes Leanne and I go. I’ve let my brother take a date here and there. But this time, I want to take you.” I gave her a tender smile across the table.

  “When?”

  “It’s not for a couple weeks. I thought we could get an early dinner, maybe at Stavros again.” My smile grew, as I thought of Stavros as “our place.” “Then we could hit the show, maybe go to your place after? What do you think?”

  I admit I’d been hoping for enthusiasm. A little excitement. Maybe some flattery at having been asked. Instead, Alicia chewed her pork and looked out the window for several beats. “Maybe,” she said finally.

  Maybe? I tried not to let my disappointment show too obviously. “Oh. Okay. Well, let me know.” I wasn’t sure what to say on the whole subject, and when Alicia asked me about a particular client I’d had that day, I realized she didn’t want me to say anything.

  That night was the first night we spent together and didn’t have sex. I think I surprised Alicia a little bit when I told her my stomach felt off and asked if she could just hold me. She agreed easily and even smiled as she held out her left arm and I tucked myself into her neck, got comfortable on her shoulder. She smelled amazing, as always. Today it was coconut and a hint of the tang of lime. I inhaled deeply and she pressed a kiss to my head, then tightened her grip, and just like that, I felt better. I told myself I was being silly. Maybe she just doesn’t like the theatre and doesn’t want to hurt my feelings by saying so. A distinct possibility, I knew, so I inhaled another deep breath, let it out slowly, and felt myself relax.

  There was nothing to worry about. Nothing at all.

  * * *

  May has always been my favorite month. The sun finally decides to show up on a regular basis. Early spring flowers start to bloom. The muddy brown of the entire world begins to recede, and green slowly takes its place. It’s the promise of warmth and beauty, I think, that draws me to that month.

  Friday that week was gorgeous. Sunny, sky the color of an Easter egg, temperatures in the low seventies. The absolute perfect kind of day for me. My mood matched the weather, as it so often does, and I entered my office floating on a cloud. The cloying scent of sausage wafting down the stairwell didn’t bother me. Neither did almost getting brained by a kickball that I dodged smoothly at the last second. It hit the wall behind me with a loud smack and bounced back to Pantone, who gave me a little wave and muttered a sheepish apology. I waved back as Leo and I went into the office.

  Leo split his time between me and Mary. The second time he sauntered back into my office to curl up on his bed, he had a dab of peanut butter on his nose. I just smiled and shook my head.

  I had a new client in the morning, a man in his forties who’d changed jobs recently and wanted to roll his 401(k) into something worthwhile. In the afternoon, I had an old client, a couple who had worked with my dad for years and were in need of some estate planning. This was the kind of workday I loved. Not packed full, but steady. When
no clients were sitting across from my desk, I had forms to fill out, phone calls and emails to return, and articles to read, as keeping up with the changing tax laws and the ins and outs of the finance world were paramount to my remaining competitive at my job.

  I was lost in one such article when a knock sounded on my door, and I looked up to see Mary with her windbreaker on, purse in hand. I glanced at the clock just as she said, “I’m heading out.”

  “Holy cucumbers, it’s five already?” I asked in disbelief. The day had flown.

  Mary’s dainty laugh pealed out of her. “Holy cucumbers? That’s a new one.”

  “Well, I really wanted to say holy shit, but I didn’t want to offend your virgin ears.”

  Mary’s scoff was exactly what I’d expected. “Please. My ears weren’t virgins when your ears were born.”

  With a chuckle, I said, “Have a great weekend, Mare. See you Monday.”

  Mary closed the outer door behind her, leaving Leo and me to ourselves. I reached above my head and stretched, my back having tightened up from sitting in my desk chair for so long. A glance out the window showed me Alicia’s baby blue BMW parked in my spot, of course, and I realized I hadn’t seen her all day.

  “Come on, Leo,” I said, as I stood. “Let’s go see our girlfriend.” I said it quietly because we still weren’t official, and I didn’t want anybody hearing me call Alicia that. It was true that I tended to think of her that way but, in reality, it had only been a few weeks, and I knew I needed to be careful establishing any kind of permanence too soon. There was no better way to scare somebody off, or so my big brother had told me ages ago.

  I wandered down the hall and to the red door of Just Wright. The whole staff was sitting in front of the whiteboard as Alicia stood, dressed in a sexy gray pantsuit and heels, pointing at the notes on it, and it amazed me that she could make even the color gray seem vibrant. Leo, unsurprisingly, sprinted across the room to the group and jumped up into Gisele’s lap, forcing a laugh from her. Alicia looked my way, our eyes locked, and my legs grew weak. This seemed to be my standard response now.

  She gave me a little wave from where she stood, but turned back to her staff. I didn’t want to interrupt her flow, so I moved as quietly as I could toward Gisele, scooped up Leo, and gave Alicia a smile as we headed back to the door.

  Since I had no way of knowing how late the Just Wright staff planned to work that night, I gathered my things, and Leo and I headed home. It was Friday night, and I hoped to see Alicia, so I sent her a text telling her so. It was nearly ten o’clock by the time I’d given up on her. Leo and I were cuddled on the couch watching Dateline when my doorbell rang. I hadn’t heard back from Alicia at all—which bothered me a bit—so I was a little shocked to find her standing at my door.

  I didn’t get to say a word. She stepped inside, grabbed my face and kissed me. Hard. Possessively. I heard her kick the door shut with her foot. Then her purse and bag hit the floor. But the whole time, her mouth was fused to mine, her tongue owning me, her hands all over me before I could even comprehend what was happening. My body overrode my brain, though (not a surprise), and soon I was grabbing at her just as desperately as she was grabbing at me. Finding and navigating the stairs seemed like way too difficult a prospect, and within ten minutes, we were on the couch, my sweats were in a ball on the floor, and Alicia was kneeling between my spread legs.

  I covered my eyes with both hands and let out a small cry as her mouth closed over me. I felt her hand on my leg, pushing it up and over her shoulder to give her better access. Which it did, judging by the much louder cry that pulled from my throat. Her warm hands slid up my body, over my stomach to capture my breasts. She kneaded them gently at first, then with a bit more firmness as she pushed her tongue into me and I lifted my hips, searching for more. She gave it.

  It was mere minutes before my orgasm tore through my body, forced my head back, had me grappling for a pillow, an afghan, a shirt, anything I could clench in my fist. Alicia grasped my hips, held me tight, stopped moving her tongue, but kept her mouth fastened over me the whole time until I slowly lowered myself back down. Then she took her mouth away, pressed a gentle kiss to my center, and finally looked up at me.

  Our eyes met over my rapidly rising and falling chest, and she gave me a smug smile. “That’s just what I was hoping for.” Her voice was quiet as she raised herself to a sitting position. I’d managed to get her jacket off her, but other than that, she was still fully clothed. Rumpled and flushed, but fully clothed.

  “That was…” I shook my head, and stayed lying down. “My legs are numb.”

  Alicia’s chuckle was amused. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

  We were quiet for a long moment, just enjoying being together. When feeling returned to my limbs, I pushed myself to a sitting position, then stretched to grab my pants. “I didn’t hear back from you,” I said, as I pushed a leg in. “So you surprised me.”

  “I know. I’m sorry.” She rubbed her forehead, then reached down to scoop Leo off the floor where he’d curled up. “Today was crazy. Way too much going on.”

  I nodded as she talked about three different pitches she was working on, two different designs she and Pantone were creating from scratch, and meetings she had scheduled next week. I listened, nodded or commented when something warranted it, but there was something in Alicia’s eyes tonight. Something…far away. I couldn’t think of a better way to describe it. I reached my hand toward her, brushed her hair away. “You okay?”

  She turned to me and nodded, gave me a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Just tired.”

  “Come upstairs with me. I’ll rub your back.” I stood up and held out a hand.

  Her shoulders fell a bit. “I can’t stay,” she said. “I’ve got some traveling to do tomorrow. Need to get an early start.”

  “You do? I thought we could spend some time together. It’s the weekend.” It was harder to hide this time, as disappointment draped over me like a sheet over old furniture.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, and stood without taking my hand, then set Leo on the couch. Her jacket was in a heap on the floor, and she retrieved it, pushed her arm in.

  “Well, can you come to dinner at my parents’ on Sunday?” I hadn’t planned on blurting it out like that, but I was feeling young. Inexperienced. Desperate. I realized I probably shouldn’t have mentioned meeting my family when she went perfectly still for a beat.

  “I won’t be back until Sunday night,” she said and finished putting on her jacket.

  “Oh. Where are you going?”

  “I’ve just got some things to take care of.” Alicia didn’t meet my eyes at all, and I swallowed hard, a weird, uncomfortable pit forming in my stomach.

  “Oh,” I said again. Lame, Lacey. So very lame.

  Alicia turned to me, gave me a very small smile, like she had to force it onto her face. Then she kissed me quickly and started toward the door.

  There was so much I wanted to say right then. So much I should’ve said. Instead, I followed her like an obedient puppy and held the door as she walked to the driveway and got into her car. She gave me a little wave, and I waved back as she drove away.

  “What just happened, Leo?” I asked my dog, my voice low, slightly confused, a little stung. Surprisingly, he had no answers for me.

  I did my best to push the concern away. It was true that it had only been a couple weeks. We’d only been together a handful of times, and I couldn’t say that I knew Alicia, because I didn’t. I didn’t really have the right to feel entitled to all the details of her life.

  Which didn’t mean my feelings weren’t hurt.

  I thought about texting her. I even thought about calling her. I was fairly certain she wouldn’t respond to either, though, and the chances of my saying something needy, stupid, childish, or all three were pretty high, so I chose to take a breath, relax, and let it all sit until tomorrow.

  “Come on, Leonardo da Vinci,” I said, as I clicked off t
he living room lamp, then the TV. “Let’s go to bed.” As we headed up the stairs, I tried my best to ignore the gentle throbbing still happening between my legs.

  Chapter Fourteen

  My mom was frying chicken for Sunday dinner, and that realization—which hit the second I entered the side door and smelled it—brightened my mood. Not a lot, but at least a little bit. There really is nothing like favorite foods from your childhood to make you feel the tiniest bit better.

  “Hi, Mom.” I kissed her cheek as Leo jumped at her leg.

  She laughed at my dog’s antics. “Well, hello there, Mr. Leo. How are you today?” She scooped him up, and he kissed her as expected, even as I saw him looking toward the chicken out of the corner of his eye. “I saved you the giblets, don’t you worry.”

  I shook my head with affection, loving that my parents loved my dog and understood what he meant to me. In the living room, my dad was in his usual spot watching his usual thing, but I was surprised to see my brother on the couch.

  “Hey,” I said. “What are you doing here?”

  Scott turned to look at me. “What are you doing here?”

  “I’m here for Sunday dinner. Duh.”

  “Me too. Duh.” He tossed a wink at me and I grinned.

  “Hi, Dad.”

  “Hi, honey. How’s life after the fifteenth treating you?” My dad asked the question without looking at me, but I was used to that.

  “Blissfully.” Back in the kitchen, I asked my mom if I could help and she put me on salad duty, which I loved. The labor of chopping, dicing, peeling…it gave me a sense of accomplishment. Plus, standing in the kitchen with my mother as we both worked on dinner for our family felt perfect. Some might find it horrendously sexist that my dad and brother sat on their asses while the women did all the work—and to be honest, I had days where I thought that exact thing and said so—but for the most part, I looked at it as time with my mother. That was something to be treasured as far as I was concerned.