Lizzi Bizzi and the Red Witch

by Stefano Pastor

  «Allah…».

  «It makes mistakes either, he did not understand anything».

  It was the biggest heresy, I shocked you. «Allah is big, he is merciful», you stuttered. «He loves us».

  «Gods only love themselves, they don’t take care of us. They govern us and that’s all».

  «You are saying terrible things».

  I pet his front, he was hot. «I want you to live, nothing else».

  You avoided my eyes. «I am sinner, I need to accept my destiny».

  I could not accept it.

  You died 27 days later the destruction of the stone, after a long and painful agony. They took you to the hospital but it was useless, none of the doctors could understand what disease affected you. Your body was unable to hold the feeding elements, it seemed like you turned into a stone.

  That night I had sex with my husband. I had it while crying, I could not stop. I disturbed him a lot, but I needed his hug, I did not want to stop. It has been the most beautiful sexual intercourse that we ever had, he was so sweet and he understood my fragility. Even after that, he stayed with me to support me.

  «We will have a baby», I said to him. «We have just conceived him».

  He was not expecting that but he smiled anyway. «I wish it is possible».

  It was not, it was obvious, I was sterile from the birth. The doctors have been clear about it, there was no hope of getting a baby.

  But I made my choice, the one that one day you will have to make. I chose and I was happy to do it. The only possible choice, the best one.

  I hold his hand tight. «We will have a baby», I went again. «You will be a father. He will be a boy. We will call him Aziz».

  He laughed. He could not understand.

  You exist. You have been on this earth since then. I gave you a new body. Grow inside me.

  No more vengeful gods, I made a choice, I told you. If God and Allah really exist, and their anger proved it, then the others must exist as well. I chose the religion that I reckon it was the best, I hugged the teachings of Buddha, the transmigration of souls and the infinite return. I chose not to see that you disappeared forever, I chose you could have another chance.

  Allah took his revenge, but I made it to take his hands off you. I am sure. God was no less as well, even he expected is revenge. We betrayed him, because the miracles have a signature.

  The first one was Silvia. She’s got leukaemia. She lost her beautiful hair, she is about to die. The scarf is back, but there’s no will anymore.

  Marco doesn’t have a leg anymore, they had to amputate it. Because of the accident while riding the bike, they said. Even worse, the infection is expanding, they fear for his life.

  And me?

  I prayed for Allah. If the miracle happened, I betrayed as well. With the mind, heart, without realising. I believed in him, in that stone, in that power. I broke the most important commandment.

  The cancer has come, subtle, it expanded in each part, it is eating me. It won’t be able to beat me, though. Not this time. You will be able to see the light, I swear. I will make you come back, my child, even if it will be the last lesson of my life.

  Remember, Aziz, remember.

  They will tell you a lot of things and most of them will be wrong. They exist, they are there. Gods are between us. The govern us, but not because of this they deserve to be adored. The free will really exist, we can always choose. Choose to make a mistake, maybe, and putting up with the consequences.

  Choose to fight against them. There is always a chance to win.

  I will not be there, I won’t be able to raise you, but you will do great things, I know it already. You don’t need any stupid stone, you don’t need of any kind of god.

  I believe in you, Aziz, my child.

  December 2013

  FREAKS

  Translation by Cinzia Albanese

  Penelope was weaving.

  In the International Circus of Phenomenal Humans of the Magnificent Santini, that’s what she did, creating cobwebs. Giant cobwebs, beautifully done. She was the Spider-Woman, and every evening showed herself in front of, every time new, gentlemen and madams, military and traders. They all applaud her, but Penelope knew they all felt pity for her and some even felt disgusted.

  She spent hours and hours practicing her number. She experimented with new arabesques to challenge her own capacity. Her caravan was filled with cobwebs, to the point it was hard to move around. She could easily, and Medusa, but for the others it was very hard, inside that caravan they felt uneasy, frightened of destroying her creations, they appeared so fragile.

  An absurd fear, knowing that her cobwebs couldn’t break, at least not that easily. They tried it a few times when they entangled themselves. They found out how sticky and strong those strings were, and how they imprisoned anyone who came into contact.

  Penelope was born like this, and her mother before her. She had two additional glands, supplying the string, allowing her to create silk. Unfortunately, these glands. Unfortunately, these glands, which she continued to exploit, grew to the point of shaping her face, swelling her neck more than normal. This was her worry, because she knew she wasn’t pretty. Even worse, she considered herself a monster, and she never showed herself in public without a vail.

  Medusa didn’t have these problems, she took every chance to free herself from that uncomfortable vail and leave her snake hair free. Even with the threatening, Medusa’s hair doesn’t petrify people, they weren’t even real snakes, they looked more like tentacles, always in movement.

  Penelope had never kissed anyone, in all her life, and always thought she wouldn’t be able to.

  «To early to say», said Medusa. After all Penelope was only sixteen years old. One of the reasons why a lot of them were shocked when Santini chose her.

  The Magnificent dominated them, his wishes were orders, nobody would dare contradict him. But this time it was different, even Medusa intervened. «You can’t!», she said «She’s only a child!».

  But Santini didn’t listen to her. He didn’t listen to anyone.

  Penelope knew it was her duty to do it, even Medusa did it six months ago, but it never worked. Until now it never worked, except that time, years ago.

  Medusa came out upset from that experience. Months passed before she was back to herself, and Penelope was always next to her. She was there when Medusa woke up screaming at night, ready to calm her down. From that day, the light in the caravan stayed on all the time, fear of darkness had become her faithful companion.

  And now it was Penelope’s turn.

  It was dangerous, very dangerous, she could have died. Others died. The last one was Kriss, the snake woman. Penelope didn’t see her, when they buried her, they didn’t allow her to go. They told her that the show went horribly wrong.

  Him.

  It wasn’t easy, but the Magnificent Santini managed: In his International Circus, that three centuries had travelled the all the lands of Europe, there was the most dangerous and terrible creature ever created. The reason why hi show was so different from any other shows of the fourth order. Nobody had in their attraction a real Vampire.

  It wasn’t true that Vampires couldn’t reproduce, that they were only dead and putrid meat. But it was nearly impossible to keep them in captivity. The first one to be captured stayed with them for four years enough to have him reproduce. Then they had to suppress him, before he annihilated the entire circus.

  With this one it was different. He was born in captivity and was used to all the chains. They looked after him, feed him and taken away all independency. That’s how they thought at the beginning. But then he grew, and the problems became bigger and he became stronger. Now he had nearly eighteen years and the Magnificent tried to make him reproduce. Desperate to dominate it for longer needing to continue his decently.

  That was the tale of the Circus, that’s how it prospered. Mating between each other, to create always new attractions. Santini was the man who decided the c
ouples, and nobody could refuse.

  The Vampire didn’t have a name, nobody gave him one. Never found anyone to give him feelings, not even as a newly born. He was dangerous, his always been dangerous. No woman wanted to breast feed it for fear of ripping off the nipple. His always been chained, always, since a baby, and his show was the bloodiest of them all. When a goat or calf was put in his cage, he would jump dangling it with his claws, breaking the neck and drinking the blood. There was always someone in the public who always felt sick, passed out or threw up. A lot of people argued but they always came back, because something was fascinating about that horror.

  The Vampire had already killed five humans, and they knew it was only the beginning. Every year that passed he was stronger and more dangerous. Kriss was the third one to die in the attempt of mating with him, but the Vampire also killed one of the guards that got too close to the cage, and even a spectator who got attracted by his beauty, without knowing how dangerous it was.

  The Vampire didn’t talk, nobody taught him. He didn’t communicate in any way. They were there to give him orders, using sharp lances, but the pain was only momentary as the damage they did to his body would heal up instantly. Physically he was beautiful, but nobody was interested in him: he was a beast, a man of the caves, closer to a zombie than a vampire, affected by a constant thirst which always took him to show his teeth of predator.

  Santini allowed him to feed only on stage, and even there with moderation. It was in his best interest that he was starving, ready to pounce on anyone who approached him. What were vampires and what he knew didn’t interest him. Being dead and coming back to life or cursed creatures coming from a land far away, for him it was irrelevant. They were a spectacle, that’s what’s important. In his Circus, there was always going to be a vampire, as there’s always been a Spider-Woman.

  Penelope couldn’t remember her mother. Medusa was the only one always next to her but she was too young to be her mother but she was more than just a friend. She was, for her, her mentor, her guide.

  Medusa spoke about him the Vampire. «I thought I could make it», she confessed. «But nothing went has planned. I chained him to the ground. He was naked, he couldn’t move. There was four other men that kept him still. I had to do everything. Only…».

  She didn’t look up and turned.

  «I didn’t even get naked. I wouldn’t have been able to in front of so many strangers. Santini was also there watching, but he stayed outside of the cage. I only managed to take my pants off and then… I went on hi, I could look at him, he scared me. He smelt my blood, he was excited, very excited. He tried to bite anyone, to free himself. I knew that, if he managed he would have ripped off my throat, I wouldn’t have been able to escape. He was silence, you know? He didn’t growl or made any sound. And those eyes… those eyes! God, how much hate!».

  She was shaking, while talking, and this was worrying because Medusa was always a strong woman, to the point of going against the Magnificent. «I made him exited, I tried. It wasn’t difficult. Then… I had to put him inside me. I tried to forget who was watching me, to forget him too. A few minutes and I would have finished, that’s all I could think».

  «It didn’t work», muttered Penelope, and it wasn’t a question.

  «He got free, like it happened with Kriss. During… the act he became stronger, because he was so excited. He escaped from the hands of the man who pinned him down and he got up. I couldn’t do anything! I was frozen, horrified! I found him in front of me, mouth wide open and eyes as red as blood. Hercules managed to grab him in time, stopping him with all his straight, and it wasn’t a small amount, but the Vampire turned, it was so quick, and he bit his arm. He took a piece of meat. Wolf jumped him on the back, putting an arm round his neck, but the Vampire threw him to the ground. I went crazy, I creamed just to be able to escape, but I couldn’t move. He was inside of me, and I couldn’t release, the blood got him even more excited».

  The tentacles on her head started to shake while she was remembering those moments.

  «The jumped on him, Hercules, the wolf and others with the lances. Piercing him all over, all the way through the ground. And he fought, continued fighting! While everyone pushed him, he kept waving his claws around to hit them! They shouted and creamed at me to move, to escape, but I couldn’t! I was a prisoner, I couldn’t get up! And that bastard, Santini, shouted saying that I had to continue, to go all the way! They couldn’t keep him, even with the lances through him he was stronger, and then Hercules came. He saved my life. even if he was hurt ran to me, he grabbed me. It was so painful! And when he took me out of that cage that bastard of Santini was furious, he even slapped me!».

  Then Medusas voice went down, it became more of a whisper. «Don’t do it Penelope. Escape».

  It was successful in the past, some of them managed to escape, renouncing the life of the Circus. What happened to those poor people? Nobody knew. The world didn’t want them, they didn’t accept them, they feared them or disliked them. There wasn’t anything else outside of the Circus, that was their home.

  Penelope never thought about leaving, she couldn’t have been able to. If she didn’t feel accepted there, outside it would have been worse.

  But that’s not the reason why she intended to obey Santini.

  The Vampire was a beautiful Vampire. Nobody realised but her. Every night she would spy him for hours. It’s been happening for years, since they were babies.

  When nobody was around, when he was closed in his cage, when he wasn’t dominated by the hunger, then he would relax, he would sit down on the floor, the small movement the chains allowed him to do, and he would look at the night skies. The times she would have wanted to sit next to him, know his dreams, his desires.

  He sleeps during the day, in the darkness of a tent, closed in a strange box, like a coffin. During the day, he wasn’t a threat to anyone. Just at the dawn of sun they chain him up again, before he woke up, and they would take him to the cage for the show. More than once Penelope challenged the sun, which she hated too, to find him. Always with caution, without anyone seeing her.

  There was a strange sign on the box, which she didn’t know the meaning of. Something scratched the wood, but not a knife. They looked like claw marks. She asks herself what it could mean and who would have made it. Not her Vampire, he wouldn’t have been able to do such a thing. Maybe his father, the one who proceeded him.

  She would open his box and stayed there watching him, caressing his naked beautiful body, there was no way that he could keep clothes on. A beast that in those moments seamed so fragile, so harmless.

  He was dead. During the day he was dead, his heart wasn’t beating and blood wasn’t flowing through his veins. It was impossible to excite him, or mate. But she would sleep in the box next to him, she would hold him and hug him often. More than ones she nearly reached her lips with his, but then she would feel nervous and run. She wasn’t disgusted about him, but of herself, poor pathetic monster.

  But now it was different, now they were chosen, now they had to do it. Now she had to unite with the man of her dreams. Her, the miserable creature.

  «My baby girl!», said Medusa in tears, when the moment come, and she hugged her.

  Napoleons tropes where getting closer, and soon they would need to move if they didn’t want to be part of the war. The Austrians where already killing around Castiglione, awaiting the French army. Santini already programmed the departure of the Circus the following day. There was no other than that occasion.

  They filled him up with blood, during the show and after. They allowed him to such dry a sheep and two calves, in the hopes that it will make him less aggressive.

  Hercules was worried. Wolf, on the other hand, was in shape. That night was full moon, and his fur got longer, covering him whole. His nostrils twitched, smelling the smell of the Vampire.

  Next to them there was Pietro, the rock man, and Lazzaro, he could come back from death. At one time, he used to be the star
of the show, until Santini found the Vampire. Every night he would kill himself on stage, with different methods, to then reborn again. No matter what, he wasn’t immortal, he knew well that one day it would happen, he wouldn’t be able to come back.

  Medusa couldn’t go with them, she saluted her outside of the caravan door. Penelope was the virgin to sacrifice to the monster, they all saw her like that.

  Everyone but not her. Penelope was different. They couldn’t understand, but for her this was the night of her wedding, she would unite with the man she loved. She’s been waiting for that moment. She chose her favourite outfit, of course black, and put a vail to hide her horrible bulge. She didn’t want him to disgust her.

  She went on her own, a fragile creature and ethereal, towards her destination.

  Santini lifted her vail and kissed her on the forehead. «You make me proud, my girl!», he said, as if for him it wasn’t just mating two animals.

  The ritual started.

  There wasn’t anyone, except them two. They all went to their caravans and closed themselves there, they have suffered enough after so many times.

  They moved aside so she could enter.

  This time they prepared it. The Vampire was locked to the earth and the chains attached to deep sticks in the ground. He couldn’t move a muscle. No matter what, Hercules and the Wolf were behind him to stop his head. Pietro and Lazzaro put him down to the floor next to their feet.

  Nobody dared to look at her, they were too sad for her. In their eyes Penelope was only a child, and nobody agreed with the obsession of Santini. The mating he ordered was obscene.

  Penelope didn’t see a beast, but the boy, the beautiful body which she always dreamt of. A body able to regenerate, to stay forever perfect, for eternity. Would he get old? No, maybe he was already in full maturity and remained like this forever. At least until Santini decides that he is too dangerous to keep using him, he would get rid of him.

  But was it really like this? What did they know about him? Maybe he was the first Vampire that was conceived in the human history. Maybe he was different, maybe his life could have been different.