Crucifax

by Ray Garton

  Jeff turned away From him and looked out the window. J.R. knew that his attempt at humor had Failed. He went on in a more serious tone.

  "I can tell this guy scares you, Jeff. Why?"

  "He… knows things about me. Things that he shouldn't know. Can't know."

  "Like what?"

  "My sister…"

  "I knew you had a sister before I even met you. It was on my list. Just because—"

  "No, no. He knew things… things I've never told anyone. Things I've only… only thought. Things…"

  "Things about your sister."

  Jeff turned fully away from him and looked out at the rainy darkness. He was fidgeting.

  "How long before the clothes will be done?" he asked.

  "Look, Jeff… if it's too personal, you don't have to—"

  "It's not that it's personal, it's just…" His voice thickened, and he stopped to gulp loudly. "There's… something… wrong with me."

  J.R. knew then that he'd been right about Jeff's feelings for Mallory, and he could see how deeply it disturbed the boy.

  "I think I know what you're talking about Jeff," he said cautiously. "I'd have to be blind not to see it in your face when you talk about your sister, hear it in your voice. Believe me, there's nothing wrong with you. It's not uncommon. I used to spend a lot of time with my sister. We were very close. I was a late bloomer—I didn't start dating until college—so we were best friends. Lots of brothers and sisters develop crushes on each other. Cousins, too. No, there's nothing wrong with you."

  Jeff said nothing.

  "But… what makes you think Mace knows about this?"

  "In the Galleria, he… he came up to me and started talking about girls, said he had just the girl for me. And he described her. Mallory, I mean. And he… he made a couple references to… well, I have these dreams about her, and… I think he knows."

  "What? How… I don't understand."

  "Neither do I. But I think he has my sister down there."

  "Down where?"

  Jeff went on to tell J.R. of the hole they'd found in the sewer and the room it had led to. He described it in detail, including the musical instruments he'd seen. Then he told him of Kevin's plans to meet with a man who'd promised to help the band.

  "I think Mace is that man," Jeff said.

  "So where is this room?"

  "In the old health club at Ventura and Whitley. I followed them there one night." He chuckled coldly. "See? There is something wrong with me."

  He told J.R. about the swimming pool, the reverend being there, the animals that were crawling around the room and that had chased him from the building once before.

  And then he told him what they'd heard happen to Nikki.

  "Jesus Christ!" J.R. blurted, standing up straight with a jolt of fear. "Jesus, we should call the police!" He suddenly felt frantic, started to leave the kitchen to go to the phone.

  "Wait, J.R. It's not what you think. Nikki was pregnant. Bainbridge, the Calvary Youth guy, was the father. And Mace made him watch while… while he aborted the baby."

  "For Christ's sake, Jeff, she could die, if she hasn't already! What did he use on her?"

  Jeff seemed to pale a bit, and his hands trembled as he said, "I think he used his… tongue."

  J.R. didn't think he heard right at first. "I'm sorry?"

  "His tongue."

  The conversation suddenly tilted, became something different altogether, a joke, maybe, or drugs, maybe they'd been taking drugs.

  "Jeff, that's… what you're telling me is…"

  Jeff began to cry. His face twisted, and his eyes welled with tears. "It came out of his mouth like… like a snake. He put it inside her and just… We ran out as fast as we could, but he caught up. Lily went on ahead of me. He… he was laughing at me, inside, he was laughing. As I left he said I'd need him, that he wanted to be my friend or something, and that I'd need him soon, and he… he called me… he said, 'You'll need a friend… big brother.'"

  J.R. nearly cried out at the words.

  Big brother.

  You lose, big brother….

  J.R. said, "What… what does he look like, Jeff? This guy?"

  "Tall, thin. Long platinum hair spiked on top. His eyes … he's got weird eyes. They're… I don't know, like a gold color."

  J.R. sucked in a breath and pressed his lips together, remembering the woman who drove his sister away from him for the last time. Her eyes had been a pale gold… strange, so coldly confident and knowing….

  You're thinking crazy, J.R. told himself, shaking his head as if to rid it of his chilling thoughts.

  "We have to call the police, Jeff," he said.

  "No, no," Jeff replied, still trembling. "He's got three of them in there now, cops, friends of his. You didn't see what we saw, J.R. This guy… he's…" His whole body quaked. "He's not human, he's deadly, deadly as hell, and… and he's got my sister in there, I just know it. If he doesn't right now, he has in the past and he will again, and I'm afraid for her, J.R., I'm scared shitless."

  "Okay, okay, just think a second, Jeff. Does your mom know about this? About Mace?"

  He shook his head.

  "Is she home now?"

  "No. At work"

  "All right. WeVe going to have to talk to her about this."

  J.R. realized he was trembling, too, and he nearly shouted when he heard a sound to his left.

  Lily stood in the doorway wrapped in a huge towel with a blanket over her shoulders. She looked upset but seemed much more composed than she'd been earlier.

  "Can I use your phone?" she asked him.

  "Sure."

  "Who're you calling?" Jeff asked, following her into the living room.

  "Nikki. Maybe… I don't know, I thought maybe I could talk to her mother. But she's probably drunk, passed out on the sofa." She punched the number out with an unsteady hand, glancing questioningly at Jeff.

  "I told him," Jeff said, with a nod toward J.R.

  The three of them were silent as Lily waited for someone to answer the phone.

  "Nikki?" she gasped. "It's Lily, are you all right?" She began to cry but tried to hide it in her voice. "Asleep? How long have you been home?… Bullshit, I know you were out! Nikki, I was there! I saw you! With that—that… No, I wasn't spying, I just—no, no, wait a second."

  J.R. released a quiet sigh of relief and exchanged a glance with Jeff.

  "But what was he doing to you?" she asked impatiently. "Oh, that's bull—no, I just wanted to… Okay. Okay. I was just worried, Nikki, that's all." She looked confused, disoriented. "I'm coming over tomorrow. I want to talk to you. You're… you're sure you're okay?… Yeah, all right. 'Night." Her hand slowly lowered the receiver back to its cradle. She looked at them with a befuddled, open-mouthed expression. "She was asleep. She got home about half an hour ago. Says she's stoned and tired, but… but she's fine."

  "What did he do to her?" Jeff snapped, sounding half-angry.

  Lily shrugged. "She was pissed at me, accused me of spying on her, and… and said he was just a friend of hers. They were… fooling around. He was just…" She laughed humorlessly. "He was just going down on her."

  "But what about the reverend and—"

  "She wouldn't talk anymore. She's tired. We're supposed to talk tomorrow."

  J.R. was immensely relieved. Jeff had had him going for a while, nearly speechless with dread. He smiled now.

  "Look, you two," he said, "I hate to say this, but… well, did you do any drugs tonight?"

  "No!" Jeff snapped. "We didn't! I told you what we saw."

  "I'm not calling you a liar or anything, Jeff, but… what you say you saw is impossible. Absolutely impossible." Jeff started to reply, his eyes angry, but J.R. held up a hand. "Wait, I'm not dismissing what you've told me. This guy Mace sounds like trouble. I promise you, I'll do what I can about him. If your sister's hanging around with him, I'll have a talk with your mother, and we'll keep her away from him. But for now… well, when your clothes are done,
I think you two should go home and get some sleep. Whatever you saw or thought you saw obviously scared the hell out of you. If you want, come back over here tomorrow, and we'll figure out who we can talk to about this Mace character. In fact, if you want, we'll go over there together, and I'll talk to the son of a bitch myself. Okay? But tonight… just get a good night's sleep. Everything sounds okay with Nikki. I'll talk to her. We'll take care of everything. There's nothing to worry about." He was wrong….

  PART IV

  Crucifax Concert

  Twenty

  October 15

  It was still raining the next morning, and the sky was the color of dusk.

  Lily picked up Jeff at ten o'clock, and they went to Tiny Naylor's. Neither of them spoke during the ride, but Lily seemed in much better shape than she had the night before.

  They were led to a table by an enormous waitress with jowls and a cigarette-damaged voice. Their booth was by a window that looked out on Ventura Boulevard.

  Once they'd ordered their breakfasts, Jeff said, "How did you sleep last night?"

  "How do you think?"

  "Yeah, me too."

  "Jeff," she whispered urgently, "what did we see? What happened last night? Are we crazy?"

  Jeff didn't know what to say. Last night, while they were in that strange dark room, he'd felt certain of what they were seeing; but since Lily had spoken with Nikki on the phone the night before, he was not quite so sure.

  "I don't know, Lily," he said. "I really don't know."

  She very casually reached across the table and took his hand, looking out the window.

  "Did your sister come home last night?" she asked.

  He shook his head. On the way home the night before, he'd explained to her why he suspected Mallory to be involved with Mace. He had not, however, told her as much as he'd revealed to J.R.

  "Were your parents angry at you for being so late last night?" he asked.

  "No. He was in bed when I got home. My dad. He doesn't worry too much about where I go. He trusts me."

  "Your parents are divorced?"

  "No. My mom died when I was a baby." She looked out the window again for a moment, thoughtful and distant, then back at Jeff again. "That's a lie. She left. I was fourteen months old. She decided she didn't want to be a wife and mother, so she took off."

  Her hand was cool in his, and her fingers twitched nervously; he realized she hadn't smiled once all morning.

  "Why did you tell me that?" he asked after a moment. "I mean, I don't mind, but… well, you didn't have to tell me.

  She shrugged. "I don't like lies. My dad lied to me until about two years ago. He told me she'd died. Then my grandmother told me the truth."

  "Does your dad know she told you?"

  "Yeah. We talked about it. I don't like the fact that he lied to me all those years, but I understand why he did it. He didn't want me to, you know, develop a complex about it, like she'd left because of me or something. For a while, I didn't think I'd be able to trust him again, but… well, he trusts me so much. He's good to me."

  "My dad left, too. I think he got tired of being a husband and father."

  "Maybe they're living together somewhere." She laughed, and her smile made Jeff feel much better, almost as if nothing was wrong, as if they were together just for the sake of being together.

  He squeezed her hand, and she returned the gesture warmly; then the moment was gone, along with her smile.

  "We have to go see her after breakfast," Lily said. "Nikki, I mean. I don't care if she's still asleep or if her mother's having one of those morning fits she always has before her first drink of the day."

  "What does her mother do?"

  "Well, she gets a lot of money from her ex-husband. He's in the movies, like a producer or something. But she also… well, she's a hooker, too."

  "You're kidding."

  She shook her head. "Nikki pretends she doesn't know. Her mother is a licensed masseuse. Nikki seems to think that's all she's doing, giving massages. But I think she knows better."

  Jeff silently hoped that Nikki did know what her mother was doing, because if she didn't, she would eventually find out somehow. He knew it would be a tremendous blow to learn such a thing about his own mother, and he felt a pang of sorrow for Nikki.

  When Lily was finished eating, she dabbed her mouth with her napkin and pushed the plate away, folding her arms on the tabletop. Tilting her head slightly, she said, "Kinda weird, isn't it? I mean, the way we're getting to know each other. Most people, you know, have something in common, like classes or music. We've got this… Nikki and your sister…."

  "Yeah," he said, nodding. "But it could be worse. We could be on our own."

  "Yeah, I guess so."

  Nikki lived on Fair Avenue in North Hollywood. She and her mother had a small second-floor apartment. The stairs and walkway in front of the apartment were sheltered, but the wind blew rain in over them as they stood before the door.

  When Lily pressed the hollow-sounding bell in the center of the door, there was no response.

  "What time is it?" she asked, ringing again.

  "Eleven-twenty."

  She reached up and removed the top cover from the porch light. A key was taped to the underside. She took it off, put the cover back, and opened the door.

  A small, pudgy woman with dark hair was sprawled on the sofa, eyes closed, mouth yawning open, wheezing steadily. On the coffee table there was a tall, empty glass and an empty vodka bottle; next to that was an ashtray overflowing with butts and ashes. An old western was playing on the television.

  "Must've had an extra fifth last night," Lily said disdainfully, leading the way through the messy, cluttered living room and down the hall.

  Nikki sat up in bed and squinted at them groggily when they entered her room.

  "What… you guys…" She rubbed her eyes and yawned.

  "Morning, Nik," Lily said. "Meet Jeff Carr."

  Jeff smiled apologetically at her. "Hi."

  "You met him yesterday, Nikki. Remember?"

  "What're you guys doing here?"

  "I told you I was coming over this morning," Lily said, sitting on the bed. "It's almost eleven-thirty."

  "Oh. Well. It's Saturday."

  "Wanna go to a movie with us today?"

  Nikki shook her head. "Can't. I've got plans." The sheet and blanket fell away from her. She wore a low-cut tank top; resting in the cleavage of her breasts was the same odd cross Jeff had seen her wearing the night before. Beneath the leather cord around her neck there was a large purple hickey.

  "What're you doing today?" Lily asked.

  "Seeing some friends."

  "Calvary Youth?"

  "Oh, no," she said, wrinkling her nose. "Not them." She drew her knees up in front of her and hugged her legs.

  "Anyone I know?"

  "Well, you said you were there last night. I didn't see you, though…. You weren't really there, were you?"

  Lily glanced up at Jeff, as if to say, Here goes.

  "Yes, we were there, Nikki. I want to talk to you about that."

  "'Bout what?"

  "About what happened there."

  "Mmm." Her brow wrinkled curiously. "Where were you? In the pool?"

  "Nikki, why were you there?"

  "Mace invited me. He's the guy who—"

  "I know who he is. I want you to tell me what he did to you. You weren't just fooling around. There was blood and… and his tongue…" Her voice had become soft and a bit afraid. "What did he do?"

  Nikki's eyes turned downward, and she picked absently at the blanket.

  Lily whispered, "What about your baby?"

  Her head jerked up with a gasp, and she looked, open-mouthed, at Lily, glancing twice at Jeff with embarrassment, humiliation.

  "He knows, Nikki. He was there, too."

  Nikki's mouth worked silently for a moment, and she finally said, "It's none of your business, you know, none of your goddamned business!"

  Lily
was obviously shocked at her language.

  "I told you I couldn't keep it, Lily. I couldn't!"

  "But why did you have him do it?" Lily asked, closing her eyes for a moment, as if hearing it all again. "Jesus Christ, Nikki, there's… there's something wrong with him, something very wrong, and you have to stay away from him!"

  "No, no, Mace likes me, he wants me there. He won't lie to me like Reverend Bainbridge." She spat the name out bitterly.

  Lily stood. "I'm going to talk to your mother about this, and—"

  "Don't you dare! It's none of your business! You don't even know Mace. Why don't you come some night? He'd like to have—"

  "I'm not going back in there."

  Nikki smiled. "How come? He even has a band down there. They're gonna play Fantazm Wednesday night."

  Jeff stepped forward and said, "Nikki, my sister's name is Mallory. Mallory Carr. Was she down there last night?"

  "Yeah, Mallory, she was in the pool. I met her. But I didn't see you…."

  "What's that?" Lily asked, pointing to the cross.

  Mallory looked down at it and her face changed; her smile softened, and her eyes seemed to be seeing something else, something far more beautiful than the plain, palm-sized object around her neck.

  "It's a Crucifax," she whispered.

  "A what?"

  "Mace gave it to me." She stared at it awhile longer but said nothing more.

  Lily said, "Nikki, why do you want to go there? Why do you want to be with someone like that?"

  Still looking at the Crucifax, Nikki replied, "He's good to us. He likes us, likes having us around. And… and he's gonna take us out of here."

  "Out of where?" Jeff asked.

  "The valley. Away from all this. Our parents, school, things like the… the fucking Calvary Youth," she whispered.

  Lily stared slack-jawed at her friend as if she were a rude stranger.

  "Where's he taking you?" Jeff asked.

  Still without looking at him, Nikki said, "To someplace better. That's all he'd say. But I trust him." She looked at him then, somewhat defiantly. "We all trust him."