by Milly Taiden
“Hello?” he said. “Blair, you know I hired you so I wouldn’t have to work on the weekends.” He lifted his finger at me, indicating he’d only be a minute. “All right. Send a basket from the company and tell Sharon to take a full week off paid.”
Adrian listened some more. “Thank you, and Blair? Please accept my apology. You can call me with things like that any time.”
Adrian hung up the phone and pulled me up.
“Something wrong?” I asked.
“The husband of one of my workers had a stroke. He’s fine, but she needs some time to help him recover.”
“Oh, well, that was very nice of you.”
“A happy worker is a good worker.” He winked, pulling out a wicker chair for me.
He uncovered a potato salad, some coleslaw, and the fish he’d grilled in the fire pit. The trout broke apart in my mouth and I couldn’t get enough. A glass of white wine washed down the lunch. We chatted about our kids through most of the meal. Adrian told me about the time his son took his bike to every junkyard he could to look for car parts. Once he saw how passionate Matt was, Adrian helped him with the larger sections, and at the age of fourteen, Matt put an entire car together.
“Yet you’ve never changed a tire,” I laughed.
“I have a feeling you’re gonna hold this over me for the rest of my life.”
Rest of his life, I thought. Could I even hope we’d remain together until death tore us apart? The words I’d once spoken as vows hummed in my mind, but somehow they didn’t seem to hold the same weight they had back when I married Dan.
“Not so complicated after all, is it?” he asked, interrupting my thoughts.
“Not when we’re alone, but there’s life outside of this perfect day.”
“I’ve lived a while. I think I can do life.”
This sounded like the right time to ask him about his plans in Canada.
“So, where do you see your life, if this opportunity you mentioned pans out?” I asked.
“It’s not a question of whether it pans out, T. The Toyota manufacturer needs the kind of high-security door locks I can produce, and it’s just a matter of a few signatures.”
“What’s stopping you?”
“A beautiful lady.” He looked directly at me.
“I told you I want you to stay.” The confusion must have been splattered all over my face.
“What the heart wants is not always what life has planned.”
So Adrian did understand what I was talking about after all. I doubted there was anyone in the world more aware of how life chose your path more than us. I waited for him to continue.
“You won’t say it out loud, but it’s difficult for you to forget the past twenty years of your life. And I would never expect you to. But will your life welcome me with open arms the way you did?”
It was rare to find someone who knew you better than closest family. Adrian was as wary about my kids and ex-husband as I was. As a father himself, he’d never expect me to choose anyone over my children. And even if I had no plans to be with Dan again, I had a feeling Dan wouldn’t make it easy for me to see someone else or share my life with him. And I couldn’t kick Dan out of my life either – I never would. After all, he was the father of my children, and just like Adrian, he owned a piece of my heart. The kids were another battle. They still believed in our happy little family, blinded to what went on when they weren’t at home or were asleep at night. I would never do anything to disrupt their childhood or confuse them beyond the divorce we’d already put them through.
Did Adrian have a deadline to sign the papers? I couldn’t imagine him living so close if we weren’t together. That was what he was waiting for, wasn’t it? To see what would happen between us before he made his decision. I wanted him to sign on the dotted line, but I didn’t want to ruin his future, either. Was the deadline soon? The coward inside me didn’t want to ask, fearing the consequences of pressure. I couldn’t take pressure.
I let out a long breath and asked, “One step at a time?”
“Yes.” He smiled. “One step at a time.”
Okay, I could do one step at a time and see where it led. There had to be a way to bind my past with my present.
We spent the rest of the afternoon soaking our feet in the cool stream. We talked about the things we’d wanted to accomplish and how much they’d changed.
“My Economics degree sometimes feels like a waste. I wish I’d discovered my passion earlier in life.”
After the kids were born I’d left a blossoming career in broker training for a part-time job I adored. I could always teach Pilates classes scheduled around my family and do private sessions in my basement studio.
“I never imagined you behind a desk,” Adrian said. “You were always a homey type.”
“And I never thought you’d wear a polo shirt. I pictured you smudged in grease and oil as a car mechanic.”
The image I’d just created in my mind revived my desire.
“I like the oil on a body part. Perhaps we should try some.” He tackled me to the ground, laughing. We rolled on the grass until I was underneath him.
“Perhaps we should.”
He kissed me tenderly, saying, “Ich liebe dich über alles.”
My heart beat to the rhythm of the woodpecker’s beak hammering a tree above our head.
CHAPTER 7
By the time Adrian drove me home, the sun was setting. Between work, kids, and Adrian’s business dealings it would be two weeks before I could see him again, which made saying goodnight that much more difficult. I sat in his car for what seemed like forever before he let me go with a longing kiss. The girl in me didn’t want to wash my lips ever again and I found it difficult to believe he’d walked back into my life only twenty-four hours earlier.
On my way into the house, the drapes in my guest bedroom moved beyond the open window. My gaze flew to the trees where the leaves stayed still. There was no breeze—not even a puff that could lift a feather.
As soon as I opened the door, Christa and Jonathan both slammed into me. I guessed it was time to get back to reality.
“Mom, Mom, you should have seen us! Dad went on this huge slide and Jonathan followed him.”
“Did you go?”
“No.” Christa shook her head pulling me toward the kitchen. “I wasn’t tall enough.”
A photo of the three of them on the kitchen counter going down the slide in an oval tube, laughing, made me think we were still that happy family. I picked up the picture. Christa and Jonathan loved their father, and I’d never do anything to sway their feelings. For once, it made me happy he found the time to spend with them. The smiles on their faces always reminded me of Dan. He’d always be part of my life in more ways than one.
“I gather you had a nice day, then?” I asked Jonathan.
“It was awesome. I want to go again.”
Dan crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the wall with that easy grin. They all had a hint of late-summer tan on their skin.
“It was a closing day today,” Dan said. “But there’s always next summer.”
“You put sun block on them?”
“Of course.”
I raised my brow. Since when did Dan remember to take sun block? I leaned lower and took a whiff of Christa’s hair. “Eeww, go wash that chlorine out. You’re blonde enough.”
“I was about to send them into the shower. How was your day?”
“Fine,” I said, widening my eyes. I wasn’t ready to discuss my date with Adrian, especially in front of the kids. “But I missed you monkeys. Let me help you get ready for bed.”
After an hour of chitchat with the kids about the water park and how much fun they’d had with their father, I tucked them in and kissed them goodnight.
Cracking my head to the side, I reached for the office door. It swung open under the pressure of my knock. Dan sat wearing only the bottoms of his sweats, clicking on his laptop. I leaned against the door frame, watching t
he shadow of his abs move as he twisted in his seat.
Why isn’t he wearing a shirt? I thought. Even if it had never bothered me before, it did now. I felt like I was looking at a stripper behind someone else’s back.
“Are you staying over?” I asked, eyeing the glass of diluted orange juice on the desk. My mood went from something along the lines of vacationing in Aruba to being stuck in the Arctic.
“Yeah, I shouldn’t drive after this.” He pointed to the glass.
My eyebrow lifted and lips tightened.
“It’s only one drink, Mia. Don’t have a cow.”
“Don’t have a cow? Are we in high school?” While Dan had denied that he drank too much, I disagreed. He always needed a drink after work. To me, once you needed it, it was an addiction.
He rolled his eyes. “Tomorrow’s Sunday.”
Unless Dan had gone out the night before and was curing a hangover the next morning at his house, we all went to church together, like a family. But he usually met us in the parking lot.
“I brought an extra set of clothes. I didn’t think you’d be back so soon. Not a good date?” He was prying, and as much as I wanted to gloat, I didn’t want to hurt him either.
“The date was fine. Are you working?”
I noted the house photos on the computer. Dan’s job was like his third child, and sometimes he treated it like his firstborn. Being in real estate meant a twenty-four-hour availability schedule for his clients and last-minute family outing cancellations. The stress of his work had taken its toll on us before we separated.
When Dan went to his job, there was no consideration for whether I had a class to teach or whether the kids needed a babysitter. I’d ended up dragging a toddler and setting up a playpen in the corner of my class. Luckily the younger one was fond of sleeping in her car seat, as long as she remained snuggled and warm. It had still been the beginning of my Pilates career, and building a reputation was like walking uphill all the time. Actually, it was more like climbing Everest every single day. I’d ended up teaching classes with toddlers and newborns where the mothers could work out while tending to their babies. It turned out to be a hit.
My busy schedule as a new mother and balancing the household, a job, and two small kids didn’t leave much energy by evening. At first I’d blamed myself for the growing distance between me and Dan. And perhaps we could have worked through the time commitment issues, or the fact that his work was always more important than mine. I could have supported his career choices and found scarce minutes to make it work. I could have been there for him, but the way he hurt me was unforgettable in my book.
I’d received a text from one of his co-workers in the middle of the night with more information than I’d bargained for, shaking the blame I carried off my shoulders. She’d mistaken his phone number for mine, or so she tried to explain later on. And, well, the fallout ended up with me throwing Dan’s clothes out onto the front porch and locking him out of our family home for good. I fought the urge to post her naked photographs on Facebook.
He denied the cheating for weeks. I was getting ready to take him back and went to his office to talk. Without bothering to knock I opened the door—a full view of Dan’s ass tensing as he banged her on his desk. Her Louboutin heels were high up on his shoulders as she moaned, “Harder, baby. Fuck me harder.” I was never been able to get the image out of my mind and prayed that Dan got a pair of blue balls that turned purple when I greeted them both.
When she tried to cover up, Amanda pressed the intercom button on Dan’s phone. Our not-so-pleasant conversation spread through the office like wildfire.
As of that day, my home was no longer his. The moment he decided to cheat and lie and make me feel like a fool, he lost me.
“Yeah, I just got a call for a new listing up north. It’s a beautiful property.” His words brought me back to the present.
“Great, I’m happy things are picking up.”
Which was true. He’d reduced the number of hours he worked and broken off his relations with the mistress in his office (who later had the nerve to send me pictures of the two of them together, in bed). As if the knife in my back wasn’t jabbed deep enough, she had to twist it right into my heart. But that was Amanda’s motto. Trying to make up to me, Dan had begun spending more time with the kids, which was what I’d always wanted, but it was too late for us. While he figured out his life and dealt with the fact that he could never regain my trust, I learned how to handle being a single mother, and after a while I’d finally gotten the respect I needed as a woman from Dan and from myself.
“Me too. So…”
“So?” I repeated.
“Who is he?” he asked.
A blast from the past was what I wanted to say, but then he’d know it was someone I knew well. And I wasn’t about to encourage him to pour that whole drink down his throat. No matter how much he denied it and how nonchalant he wanted to appear, I knew he’d be hurt. The years we’d had together would always connect us, and Dan had never made it a secret that he still loved me.
“Uhm… I should get the kids’ clothes ready for morning.” I turned back toward the door, but he spun out of the chair, all sobered up and grabbed my wrist.
“Mia, let me do it.” He let go of my hand and squeezed past me through the doorway. The front of his soft pants brushed against me, making me tingle for all the wrong reasons. His chest rose higher, forcing me to stare at the pecs I’d once grazed with my hands and my mouth.
What was happening to me?
“You?” I asked, hearing my voice betray me.
“It’s my weekend. Why don’t you take a bubble bath and relax? Or read a book.”
What the hell happened to you? I thought. And where did the Dan I married go?
“Uhm, okay,” I said.
The smile on his face looked genuine, but something inside me sensed an ulterior motive. We stepped to the side at the same time, then back again, together.
“What are you doing?” I narrowed my brows, placing my hands on my hips.
“Nothing.” He raised his arms in defense, only making his chest widen in a sweet stretch.
I shut my eyes. Maybe the bubble bath was a good idea. My head was way too full of… of everything.
Finally squishing past him, I marched upstairs. I could almost feel him grinning behind me, and I didn’t know why.
Lavender bubbles were floating a few minutes later. I stepped into the bath and let the foam encase me. Somehow it felt as if the suds protected me from the outside world. The instant relaxation of the warm water around me eased the tension in my shoulders as I wondered how to introduce Adrian to the family. Was I making this too difficult on myself?
The steam rose higher and higher. A flash of a taut body skimmed in my mind and I smiled at the memory of Adrian’s muscled arms holding me against him, feeling like there was nothing better in the world than our touch. My hand traveled down my belly, remembering how well his mouth devoured my lips, how much I wanted his lips on my neck, my breasts, hips, and inner thighs. The ache in my lower half intensified. Sliding my hand between my legs, I touched myself, thinking how it would feel to have Adrian’s hands on me, right there on that swollen mound. Would they be as eager as I’d remembered, or more assertive and confident when touching me? Or would he take his time to tease and tantalize me?
My mouth opened a tad, letting the hot breath out. I opened my legs wider. It had been so long since I’d found relief. I slid my fingers between my slick folds, parting them on the way down, then drew higher. The tiny circles of my fingers worked slowly at first, stimulating my clit. My ass tightened and I pressed higher. A faint sound of soft music penetrated the walls. The ease in my shoulders allowed my head to fall to the side, and my hand quickened its rhythm. The first zaps began to flow from my onslaught. A new song began. It was my favorite playlist. Dan had always put that song on when we… oh, gosh, was he expecting something tonight?
My hand flew up, stopping the oncoming org
asm.
A faint knock on the door startled me.
“Can I come in?” Dan asked.
“I’m in the tub.”
“And I have a glass of wine for you. I promise not to look.”
I swished the bubbles around, covering my flustered body, before I said, “Okay.” But of course Dan was already halfway through the door. Still without a shirt, he eyed me from above. The small flex under his pants didn’t go unnoticed.
“Don’t get any ideas,” I warned.
“Too late.” The deeper tone of his voice sent a wave of jitters through my body. Dan had me cornered. I was naked in the tub, and wanton.
He offered the glass to me. I reached for the wine, but he pulled his hand away, forcing me to lift higher out of the tub. I stopped just before my breasts floated to the top.
“Really?” I asked.
“Can’t blame a guy for trying.” He shrugged.
“You need to stop trying,” I said. “Wouldn’t your girlfriend be jealous you’re in the bathroom with your naked ex-wife?”
“I don’t have a girlfriend.”
“Just mistresses and one-night stands, then?”
He frowned, hitting his fist against his chest, overacting the act of a stab. He then sat at the side of the tub, watching me with intent. I lowered my body under the water, wishing I could go sink to the bottom and stay there, and praying the plug wouldn’t give out in the tub.
“Sorry, that was below the belt,” I said.
“A deserved blow nonetheless. I know what I’ve done and I know nothing will change the way you feel about us. I’ll try harder—”
“Dan, we’re not getting back together. If I gave you the wrong impression—”
“You haven’t. I was going to say I’ll try harder to be the father you always wanted me to be. The one I should have been from the beginning instead of hiding away at the office.” He paused. “Pretending to work at times and instead dragging your name through the mud.”
It was the most honest apology I’d received from him since he cheated, and I wished I could get up to embrace him. The suds began to break apart and for a moment I thought I saw him peeking at me, which made my cheeks heat. It had been a quite a few months since we’d last been together, and despite my raging hormones in the past twenty-four hours, at this moment Dan was the last person whom I wanted to relieve the pressure below my belt.
