End Game_Bellevue Bullies Series

by Toni Aleo

  My eyes burn with tears that I won’t allow to fall before I take her mouth with mine once more. Everything just hurts but feels fucking great at the same time.

  It’s a tortured feeling only Sofia can give me.

  What the hell am I going to do?

  Sofia falls asleep in my arms.

  I don’t want to let her go, but I have to pee and I need some water. I slowly move out of my bed, careful not to wake her before covering her up with my blanket. As I stand there, I watch her, sleeping so soundly, and I thank God for her. Just like Shea said to. Leaning down, I kiss her temple before heading to the bathroom. After doing my business and washing my hands, I put on a pair of sleep pants and head out of my room for the kitchen. When I reach the second set of stairs, I hear voices coming from the kitchen. I’m surprised to find my mom and Elli sitting at the table, laughing about something. When they see me, they flash me a grin.

  I eye them suspiciously. “What are you two doing?”

  “We decided to drink a bottle of wine,” my mom says, her words a little slurred.

  Elli laughs as she looks at me. “She means three.”

  Mom holds up three fingers. “Yes, three.”

  I chuckle as I go to the fridge for a bottle of water. “You two are nuts. Did Shea head home?”

  “Yeah, took the kids,” Elli says, leaning back as she holds her glass close to her lips. “There were some weird noises coming from upstairs, so we needed to clear the house.”

  They both snicker as I pause at the fridge. “Yeah, we were watching Animal Planet.”

  Mom snorts. “Was there an animal named ‘Oh, Ryan’?”

  Their laughter runs up my back, and I’m so glad Sofia is dead asleep upstairs. She’d die from embarrassment. Me, I don’t care. Turning, I look at both of them, holding my water to my lips. “Yup, the chimpanzees.”

  That sends them into a frenzy of laughter as I take a long pull of my water. Clearing my throat, I nod to them. “You two just down here, shooting the shit?”

  Mom grins up at me. “We’re talking about life, love, and loud sex,” she says, holding her glass to a snickering Elli. “It’s been fun.”

  “I can tell,” I say dryly, pulling out a chair and sitting down. “I don’t know if I want to be included.”

  Elli taps my hand. “We’re well past what you two were doing, so you may be safe.”

  I smirk at her. “Oh thank God.”

  They both laugh at that as Elli takes a long sip from her glass. “But I was telling your mom we need a vacation.”

  “I agree.”

  “Right! So, tell your mom to take a week off and go to Vegas with me.”

  “Elli, I can’t just go to Vegas. I have work.”

  “You run the business. And who has a party the last week of January? Yes, the first week. But the last? No.”

  I pause. “Wait? You’re going to Vegas the last week of January?”

  “Yes, that’s what I just said, didn’t I?” she asks my mom, and Mom nods.

  “You did, and you want me to go.”

  “Yes! It would be so much fun. We can act like we’re in our twenties.”

  Mom snorts at that, but I’m out of my seat and looking at the GymBulls schedule that is on my mom’s fridge.

  Like I thought, they have a meet that week. I look to Elli, just as she glances up at me. “What?”

  “Will you be home in time for Amelia’s meet?”

  She nods. “Oh yes, we’ll be there. I promised Grace. We won’t miss it.”

  Mom rolls her eyes. “I don’t know.”

  I sit back down, scooting my chair to Elli and putting my face in her view. “Elli, I need a favor.”

  She squints at me, and then she smiles. Taking my face in her hands, she kisses me loudly on the cheek. “You’re so cute. He looks just like Shea.”

  Mom laughs. “I know. Which means he looks like me, which makes me happy.”

  “Right? I love when my kids look like me. Shelli, it changes with her mood. She drives me crazy, and have I told you I hate her hair?”

  “Oh my God, me too! It’s awful!”

  “Right?”

  I shake my head. “Elli, focus.”

  She looks back to me and grins. “Yes?”

  “I need a favor.”

  She nods, her wine sloshing out of her glass. “Anything. Anything for you. You’re my favorite.”

  This probably isn’t the best time to ask, but I’m going to anyway. “I want to surprise Sofia. Will you help me?”

  “Of course!” she says happily, and my heart soars.

  Because I want to continue making Sofia happy for as long as I can.

  Chapter Forty-One

  Sofia

  I stroke my fingers along Ryan’s jaw, but he’s dead to the world. He came back to bed around one last night, and when he realized I was awake, he made love to me.

  I’m forever yours.

  Those words play over and over again in my head. His rough voice, his burning gaze, it all makes me feel so raw. How am I supposed to let go of someone who looks at me like he does and says words like that? It hurts. Everywhere. I don’t want to think of it, but it’s all I think of when my mind is left alone. I want to give him everything. I want to be with him for the rest of my existence, and it kills me that I’ve allowed myself to get here when I knew from the beginning he was leaving. I also knew he would never let me give up everything for him. Which I know I don’t want, but still.

  I should have just resisted.

  I swallow my laughter as I nuzzle my nose into his neck. Resist? Please. I had no chance once he decided he would make me his. I trail my fingers down his chest, circling his hard pecs and his even harder stomach. I hate this thought, but I wish he were like Drew. Or I was like Drew. Ha. That would never happen. It’s not in our blood. We want the other to succeed and do big things. We want the other to be so fucking happy. Even if it doesn’t include us both.

  That’s why I love him so.

  I close my eyes as I inhale his unforgettable scent. It’s so woodsy, so spicy like the tobacco barn that burned beside the trail I ran along when I first got here. He smells divine, and it brings tears to my eyes knowing I won’t have this to keep forever. I watch as he takes in deep breaths, letting them out slowly, a low rumble from his large chest. I love his soft snoring that he claims he doesn’t do. It soothes me.

  If I stay here, I’m gonna cry.

  I push the blankets off my naked body and get up. Reaching for my PJ shorts and one of Ryan’s long tees, I head to the bathroom. After going through my morning routine, I head out of the room quietly and then walk downstairs. Maybe someone is up, and they can distract me from my pitiful thoughts. Thankfully, I hear movement in the kitchen as I reach the bottom of the stairs. I head toward the noise and find Mrs. Justice at the sink filling the coffeepot.

  She looks over her shoulder at me, and a bright grin covers her beautiful face. “Ah, Sofia. Good morning. You’re up early.”

  I shrug as I walk in, heading to the counter beside her. “I’ve been getting up at four the past nine days. I usually run and then afterward head to the gym. Pretty sure if I tried that this morning, Ryan would kill me. He’s out cold up there.”

  She chuckles softly. “He’s always been a sleeper, and I know he is worn out. He was beyond busy when he was gone. Every time I called, he would rush me off the phone.”

  I grimace. I wonder if it’s because he was talking to me? Shit. “Yeah, he was.”

  “To talk to you,” she says with a sneaky grin, and I smile sheepishly, my face flushing.

  “Maybe?”

  “Don’t be embarrassed or even try to feel guilty. I’m so happy he is with you.”

  My heart warms. “Really?”

  “Oh yes. He wasn’t much of a dater in his teens. He had one girlfriend, I think, but I don’t think she was ever really his, not like you. I don’t know. It was weird. One day, they were good, the next, they were screaming at each other. Very
dramatic.”

  “Sounds fun,” I say with wide eyes, and she laughs.

  “Exactly, and then there was no one during college, until you.”

  I don’t know why that fills me with joy, but it does. I like that he felt I was special enough to be with. I feel the same for him.

  “He’s my first boyfriend. Ever.”

  Mrs. Justice smiles over at me. “I think Amelia told me that, but look at how great of a gymnast you are as a result. In a way, I’d say you weren’t missing much.”

  I shrug. “I don’t know. I think the way I grew up tainted me. I missed a few opportunities with Ryan at the beginning ’cause I tried to fight it off. But alas, he’s just so dreamy,” I tease, and she laughs.

  “That he is,” she adds with a grin as she pours a cup of coffee. “Want a cup?”

  “Yes, please.”

  I take the cup she offers, and we head to the table. She sips hers and sighs very loudly. “I may be a tad hungover.”

  I snort in disbelief. “Really?”

  “Yes, my sister-in-law is hell-bent on getting me drunk every chance she gets. She loves it. Says I don’t let loose enough.”

  “Do you not?”

  “No,” she says with a laugh. “But I don’t have time. I worry for my babies, I work my ass off, and I miss my husband. So when in the middle of all that should I drink more?”

  “Some would say all the time.”

  She laughs at that. “No wonder Elli adores you,” she says sweetly as she leans back, bringing her knees up to her chest. She rests her cup on them as she sighs. “James used to say Amelia was going to put us in an early grave. If he were still here, this crap with that idiot Drew would be what killed him.” My stomach drops as I watch her shake her head. “But then, there is no talking to Amelia. When she has her heart set on something, she does it.”

  “Some would appreciate that. Except when she’s wanting to give up everything for some dude.”

  “For sure,” she agrees, a soulless laugh leaving her lips, but then she looks to me over her cup. “Would you do it? Give it all up for Ryan?”

  I look away, swallowing a mouthful of coffee. “We wouldn’t let the other do that. We respect each other too much.”

  A smile pulls at her lips. “Which is how it should be.”

  “I asked Amelia not to go,” I say, and I don’t know why. It doesn’t matter. Amelia is set on going. No one can change her mind, not even Shelli.

  “Well, we all told her no, so I guess it’s good someone actually asked her not to.”

  “She didn’t listen.”

  “And she won’t. She’s like her brother. When she has her mind set on something, it’s hard to deter them or even let them see reason.” I nod in agreement, but then she shakes her head quickly. “Enough about this. I can’t dwell, or I’ll be joining my husband very quickly. While I would enjoy that, I have two kids to continue raising.”

  My lips curve gently. “For what it’s worth, they’re amazing people. Honestly. Both so kind and giving. They’d do anything for anyone.”

  Mrs. Justice waves me off. “That’s all James.”

  “Really?” I ask, moving to the edge of my seat. “But you’re the same.”

  “Because I learned from him,” she says, so fondly it hurts my heart. “He didn’t grow up with money, he was self-made. He worked from the day he turned sixteen until a couple weeks before he passed. When I met him, he was in his prime. Swimming in money,” she laughs, her eyes physically on mine, but I know her mind is somewhere else. “He thought that’s how he would get me to give him a chance, by throwing money at me. But that wasn’t how I worked. I didn’t want a man, I didn’t want to be in a relationship, but he wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

  “Sounds like Ryan.”

  “Oh yes,” she says with a nod. “Cut from the same cloth, those two.”

  “I admire it.”

  “Oh, I did too. I thought it was exciting to have someone who wanted me so desperately. It became a game until I got knocked up. Then it became very real.”

  When she laughs, I laugh too. The love is so bright on her face, it’s as if Mr. Justice is still here, just in the other room, sleeping on the sofa or something. I never had a dad, so I don’t know what it’s like. But with the way Ryan and Amelia talk about theirs, I feel I may have missed out. Though, I doubt my dad would be like Mr. Justice. My mom didn’t make the best choices.

  “Anyway, I am getting away from the point of what I was trying to say,” she says with an airy chuckle before brushing her mass of dark hair off her shoulders. “James loved giving his money away. I used to tease him for it because my dad was a saver. It didn’t matter that he made good money. He hoarded it. He never gave it away. He even fought me on paying for my wedding, saying he didn’t think he needed to since I was already knocked up.” Her face breaks into a grin as she shakes her head. “James said fine, I’ll give you the wedding of your dreams. And he did. He was just amazing like that. He wanted everyone to be happy. He flew my parents in, he paid for their lodging, and he gave them the best damn time of their lives. They still love him and probably miss him as much as I do. But that was James, so giving. Even when my dad apologized for being stingy, James waved him off. ‘It’s for Grace,’ he would say. ‘I’d give her the world.’ And he did. But it wasn’t just for me.”

  I assume she means Ryan and Amelia, but she continues. “He helped with the food bank here in Nashville. When Shea went to the Assassins, James was very involved in Shea’s pediatric cancer foundation. He ran it for many years until Shea retired and took over. During all of it, we had Ryan and then Amelia. Years went by, him working his ass off, helping raise two very busy children, and supporting me with my business. When Ryan got into hockey and then Amelia into gymnasts, he saw how expensive it was. I’m sure you know. It’s insane.”

  I nod. “My mom worked three jobs.”

  “See, insane,” she says, shaking her head. “And James would sit up at night and think of the children who couldn’t pay for it. He wanted to help them, so he got with Shea, and they started a program for kids who wanted to play hockey but couldn’t afford the equipment. He would pay for the girls who couldn’t afford their monthly tuition at the gym. What blew my mind was that no one ever knew. He didn’t want it that way.”

  “That’s beautiful,” I say softly, and she nods.

  “It is, and then when Ryan went to hockey camp the summer before his junior year of high school, his roommate, Edward, had just finished his sophomore year at Bellevue on scholarship. He was from nothing and had nothing. Bless him, he was struggling. Ryan would pay for him to eat, and when he ran out of money, they’d come home. We didn’t mind because we hated that Edward didn’t have money to eat. That’s unfair. No child should ever be hungry. It should be illegal.”

  “Absolutely. Even though we didn’t have a lot of money, I always had food.”

  “Exactly, and I remember lying in bed and James saying he wanted to help him. So he became a sponsor for Edward, and it was funny because Edward never knew. It was nice, watching him grow and come into his skin. He works for an investment bank now, and I’m so glad James was able to see that before he passed.”

  I swallow hard as Grace’s eyes fill with tears. “He wanted to do it for one student athlete in each sport. I told him I thought that was a lot, especially since we had our own college student and Amelia would be there soon, but he didn’t listen to me. He set it up, and he didn’t want anyone to know. They didn’t, and when he passed, I felt in my heart I had to keep doing it. So I have.”

  My mug stops right in front of my lips as I gaze at her, my heart picking up in speed. Her eyes meet mine as a slow smile pulls at her lips. Tears start to spill over her lashes as she takes a deep breath. “Before, he picked the students he sponsored. But now I do it, and I’ll never forget your application.”

  Oh fuck.

  “A girl who was knocked down nine times but got up ten. I knew from the moment I re
ad your name and I saw your face grinning up at me, you were going to do great things. I remember being so excited that you accepted, and then when I found out Amelia was your roommate, I cried. I knew I would get to know you. What I didn’t realize was that you were going to be so much more than just a GymBull. You became my daughter’s best friend, and then you captured my son’s heart, bringing such light to his life. Like James did for me.”

  I swallow the emotion that is choking me as my eyes bore into hers. “You’re my sponsor?”

  She nods. “I am, but I’m not. James set everything up, and he made the rules, which is why I was so upset when you told me you couldn’t go home for a freaking weekend. What kind of stupid rule is that? But the more I dug into it, I realized it was to make sure you stayed focused. I can’t change anything he has done, but know that if you want to go home, I’ll take you myself.”

  Tears start to roll down my face. “This family does enough already. I’m speechless.”

  Mrs. Justice nods, and I can see she’s struggling a bit. “I didn’t want to tell you. I didn’t want this to change our relationship. I adore you, and I love that you and Ryan are together. I don’t want you to think just because James is your sponsor, things are different, ’cause they aren’t. The kids don’t know. Shea and Elli don’t know. No one is to know, but I wanted you to be aware how sorry I am about not getting you to your mom. I know you miss her, and I know she has to miss you.”

  I wipe my tears with the back of my hand and slowly shake my head. “I wouldn’t be here without this sponsorship. I’d still be in Nevada or at some school with nothing, struggling to make ends meet ’cause I’d have to work…”

  “Exactly. And I wanted to give you more. I wanted you to have your dreams, and I love how you want to build a gym. I see such potential in you, and I was so excited when I got to meet you as Amelia’s best friend. When I got to meet you as Ryan’s girlfriend, my heart just couldn’t take it. It was like you’re meant to be here. With us.”