The Husband Maker Boxed Set

by White, Karey

  “That’s just a formality.” Angus was now sprinkling herbs over his grilled shrimp. “Aaaaand, I win.” He threw his arms up in the air.

  “Maybe you should have Angus make your wedding cake.” Will took the controller from my hand. “All right, Angus. Bring on the custard.”

  Two days after Christmas, I noticed a change in CJ’s phone calls. He was quiet, and he didn’t ask me any questions. “Are you feeling okay?” I asked him.

  “Yeah, I’m fine.”

  “You’re so quiet. Is something wrong?”

  “No. I’m just tired.”

  “What are your plans today?” I asked.

  “Oh, I don’t know. Just hanging out, I guess.”

  Several silent seconds passed. “You’d tell me if there was something wrong, right?”

  “Stop worrying. There’s nothing wrong.”

  The next day CJ didn’t call at all, and when I tried his cell phone, it went directly to voice mail. I sent him a text that went unanswered before I went to bed.

  It got worse after that. We only talked two more times during the break, and both times were clumsy and uncomfortable, and I had to drag every word out of him. Something was wrong, but CJ wouldn’t tell me what it was. I had a sick feeling inside. I needed Christmas break to be over.

  CJ didn’t come see me when we got back to school. Two days passed, and still he hadn’t come over or answered his phone. I stopped by his apartment twice, but he wasn’t home either time.

  “I wonder what’s going on,” I said to Hannah, my roommate.

  “I’m sure everything is fine. Don’t get weird and paranoid.”

  I tried not to be weird or paranoid, but I didn’t understand what was happening. We’d been planning our future together just a few short weeks ago, and now we weren’t even speaking. I cried myself to sleep that night. The next morning, as I looked at my puffy eyes in the mirror, I decided I wouldn’t go to bed again without some answers.

  That night I walked the several blocks to CJ’s apartment and knocked on the door. His roommate, Doug, answered. “Hi Charlotte.” Doug glanced through the open door of the apartment, looking so uncomfortable I almost felt sorry for him.

  “I need to see CJ.” I worked hard to make my voice strong. There would be no crying tonight. At least not until later.

  “I’m not sure if...” Doug’s voice trailed off.

  “I’ll wait out here.” I shoved my hands in my pockets. “You can tell him I’m not leaving until he comes out and talks to me.”

  Doug left the door open, and I sat down on a boulder in a flower bed a few feet away. It was a bitter night. Cold seeped from the rock through my jeans, and the wind bit at my cheeks. I pulled my jacket closer around me.

  “You can’t leave her out there. She’s freezing.” Doug’s voice carried through the open door. Finally, CJ stepped outside and closed the door. His feet were bare—my first clue this would be a short conversation. We stared at each other for several seconds before either of us spoke.

  “Hey, Charlotte. How ya doing?” The line sounded practiced, like he’d rehearsed it over and over as I waited on the freezing rock outside his door.

  “Is that a real question?”

  “Uh, yeah.”

  “I think you can probably figure out how I’m doing. You want to tell me what’s going on?”

  CJ folded his arms against the cold. He didn’t speak right away, and when he did his voice was quiet. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know she’d be there.”

  “Who?”

  “Jenny.”

  “Who is Jenny?”

  CJ sighed. “We met up with some old family friends in Park City. I haven’t seen her for years, and . . .” He stopped talking.

  “And what?” CJ looked at the ground by my feet. “And what?” I said again.

  “And we’re dating.” He started hopping back and forth, and for a moment I thought it would serve him right if he got frostbite.

  “Oh, wow. Were you ever going to tell me?”

  “I’m sorry.”

  I turned and started walking home. The freezing air turned my hot tears cold on my cheeks.

  “Charlotte, can we talk about it?” he asked before I turned the corner.

  “We just did,” I called back, but I didn’t turn around.

  CJ married Jenny during spring break.

  I didn’t want to think about CJ on my birthday, so I turned my attention to the reason for my stop.

  There were only three birthday cards in the store for twins. One of them had fairies on the front and talked about “the Magic Kingdom of Twindom.” Nope. The second had a lame joke about sharing amniotic fluid. The third said something about looking in the mirror and seeing yourself. Well, clearly Will and I aren’t identical twins, so that card was inapplicable enough to be funny. It came with a pink envelope that I traded out for a green one, and I headed to the closest cash register.

  Bearded CJ lookalike stepped in line right behind me.

  “Charlotte, is that you?”

  So bearded CJ was the CJ I’d dated. Of all the stupid luck.

  “CJ? I almost didn’t recognize you.” That wasn’t entirely true.

  “You look great. Are you living here in Fairfield?”

  “No. I’m still in San Francisco. I’m out here today to see the family.” No need to solicit birthday wishes from an ex. A quick look at a bag of Huggies told me CJ was probably a father. He noticed my glance.

  “Did you know Jenny and I had a baby?”

  “I didn’t. Congratulations. Boy or girl?”

  “Boy. We named him Charger.”

  I love it when guys give me a reason to be grateful things didn’t work out. “Is that a family name?”

  “No. It’s just a name I’ve always liked. I’ve always wanted to have a son named Charger and a daughter named Poppins.”

  And the reasons kept coming. “Well, congratulations. I’m happy for you.” I turned toward the cashier, hoping it was my turn.

  “Are you, Charlotte?” CJ’s voice was low and serious.

  “Excuse me?” I turned back.

  “Are you really happy for me?”

  “Of course I am.”

  “I handled things badly, and I always thought you must hate me. You know, maybe you’d make a voodoo doll of me and poke it with pins or rip off its fingers and toes.”

  “Do voodoo dolls have fingers and toes?”

  CJ didn’t laugh.

  “First of all, I don’t know the first thing about making a voodoo doll, and secondly . . .” I was about to tease him and tell him if I knew how to make voodoo dolls, I’d have made one of Jenny, but the look on his face told me he wasn’t going to respond well to sarcasm. “Well, there is no secondly. I really am happy for you.”

  “Can I help you?” the cashier finally asked, and I handed her the birthday card.

  “Take care.” I waved at CJ as I left.

  “You’re an angel,” he called after me. Horrified, I glanced around and saw several people watching me. Thanks, CJ.

  Of course I was the last one to arrive at Mom and Dad’s. Even Angus’s car was already there.

  “Finally. Where have you been?” McKayla came skipping out to my car and gave me a rib-crushing McKayla hug. “I haven’t seen you in forever.”

  “I know. We’re awful. We need to start meeting halfway for dinner or something.” I stepped back and ran my fingers through her short hair. “You look great. Where did your hair go?”

  “I felt like trying something new.”

  “I like it. It’s very Michelle Williams.”

  “It’s so easy. You should go short, too. I’ll cut it for you if you want. I brought my stuff. We could do it today.”

  “I could use a trim, but I have to be able to pull it up in a ponytail.”

  “Yeah, yeah. That’s boring, but if there’s time after dinner, I’ll take an inch or two off for you.”

  “Let’s make time.”

  McKayla waited while
I signed Will’s card on the hood of my car and slipped in the tickets. Finally, I reached in the passenger door and pulled out my flowers.

  “Ooh, pretty. Although I’m not sure Will’s much of a flower guy.”

  I laughed. “These aren’t for Will. These are mine. I thought we could all enjoy them.”

  “Who are they from?”

  “A guy I went out with last week.”

  McKayla raised one eyebrow.

  “Okay, his name is Kyle. Jayne set us up. There’s not much to tell. We’ve only gone out once. So far.” I grinned.

  “I like the ‘so far.’ Are you interested?”

  “I didn’t think I would be, but yeah. I think I am. I’ll keep you posted.” We were at the door, so I lowered my voice. “But let’s not make a big deal about it to the family. This isn’t really news yet. If anyone asks, they’re from a friend.”

  McKayla grabbed my arm to keep me from opening the door. “Speaking of news, what’s Will’s big news?”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Come on. Will tells you everything. Don’t pretend you don’t know.”

  “I really don’t know what you’re talking about. How do you know he has news?”

  “I heard Mom talking to Gina in the kitchen, and she said, ‘we can’t wait to hear your big news.’”

  “Well then, we’d better go in and get the news.”

  It was great to have the whole family home. I hugged everyone except Angus’s date, who I’d never met before. “Hey, Charles, this is Wyatt.”

  “Charles?” his date asked.

  “Wyatt?” I asked back. We all laughed.

  “Charles is just one of Charlotte’s many nicknames,” Angus told Wyatt. “There’s also Chuck and Chuckers.”

  “Pretty, huh?” I glared at Angus.

  “Wyatt is actually my name,” said the striking red head with porcelain skin.

  “It’s nice to meet you.”

  “You too. Happy birthday, by the way. Hope you don’t mind me crashing your party.”

  “Of course not. The more the merrier. Besides, it wouldn’t be a real birthday for Will and me if Angus wasn’t here to sing off-key.”

  “I do it on purpose. I really can carry a tune,” Angus said to Wyatt.

  “Then provide us with the evidence,” Will said, sounding lawyerly.

  “Someday. Maybe I’ll surprise you all and sing at Chuck’s wedding.”

  “That would be a surprise.” Will looked at me in horror. “Gus singing, not Chuck getting married.”

  Dad put his arm around me. “Charlotte will get married when she’s good and ready.” I wasn’t offended, but Dad always worried about my feelings, and I loved him for it.

  “How was your round of golf?” I asked Angus and Wyatt.

  “It was pretty good,” Wyatt said.

  “She’s being modest. She beat me by four strokes.”

  “Losing your touch?” Will asked.

  “No, man. She’s just good. She played in high school, but after today, I’m thinking maybe she should join the pro circuit.”

  “You were just off your game.” Wyatt patted Angus’s arm.

  “Actually, that was one of my better games.”

  Dinner consisted of all our favorites. Or at least they’d been our favorites when we were about nine years old. We ate Mom’s not-from-a-box macaroni and cheese (my favorite) and Will’s chili dogs. It was a tradition I’d have been okay doing away with, but everyone else thought it was fun. Luckily, I’d never outgrown Mom’s sour cream chocolate cake with poured fudge icing.

  The family sang “Happy Birthday” to us. I think Angus purposely tried to sound as bad as possible because he grinned at me and bowed. We blew out about thirteen candles each, and ate cake and ice cream while we opened presents. Will loved the concert tickets. And so did I.

  “We must be twins,” I said when I opened my envelope from Will and Gina and found two tickets to Mumford and Sons.

  “Hopefully you won’t have any trouble finding someone to go with you.”

  “I volunteer if you can’t find anyone else.” Angus raised his hand.

  “Don’t worry about Charlie. She’ll find someone.” McKayla winked at me. Mom, who never missed a thing, saw the wink and gave me a questioning look, which I promptly shrugged off, knowing she’d privately insist on more details before I left.

  We finished opening presents, and Mom started gathering everyone’s dessert dishes. Will cleared his throat. “Mom, can we wait a minute on those? Gina and I have some news.”

  “Of course.” Mom stacked the dishes on the coffee table and sat back down beside Dad.

  “I have some news, and Gina has some news. Who do you want to go first?”

  We glanced around the room at each other, and Dad said, “Well, how about the lady goes first?”

  Gina smirked at Will before she turned to the rest of us. “Well, you know we went back east last week. Will interviewed at law firms in D.C. and New York. Well, he’s been offered a job.”

  Mom moaned. “I was afraid you were going to say that. Not that we aren’t happy for you, but the east coast is so far away.”

  “If you got the New York job, then I’m taking the New York Methodist residency for sure,” Angus said.

  “Do you want to tell where you got the job?” Gina asked Will.

  “No, you go ahead.” It looked like they were trying to hold in their delight.

  “All right.” Gina lost her battle with her smile and grinned. “He’s going to be a prosecutor in Berkeley.”

  “As in California?” Dad asked.

  “As in less than an hour from here,” Will said, and the room erupted with cheers and congratulations. I was glad no one would be moving far away. I wasn’t ready for that.

  “Well, that didn’t make my decision any easier.” Angus hugged Will.

  “Sorry, Man.”

  “No problem. This is great news for you guys.”

  “Speaking of news,” McKayla said. “You said there’s more.”

  The room quieted, and Will put his arm around Gina. “This is even better news than the job. You want to show them what you gave me for my birthday?” he asked Gina. She fiddled in her purse for a moment then pulled out a pair of pale yellow booties.

  “What?”

  “When?”

  “That’s great news,” Dad said. Mom covered her mouth with her hands and tried not to cry.

  “You guys need to get busy so our little guy has a cousin close to his age,” Will said to McKayla and Connor.

  “We’ll get right on that.” Connor squeezed McKayla’s shoulder.

  “It’s a boy?” Angus asked.

  “We don’t know yet.” Gina elbowed Will. “It might be a girl, you know.”

  “I know. I don’t know why I said ‘he.’ I don’t care which it is.”

  I was thrilled for them. I really was. I was excited to be an aunt, and Will and Gina would be such great parents. But it did give me a little pinprick to the heart to know I was nowhere near being in a position to provide a cousin for their new baby. What if they were finished having their children before I even found the right man?

  I hugged Will and Gina then picked up the dishes Mom had put on the coffee table and headed for the kitchen.

  “Berkeley’s good news, isn’t it?” Angus had followed me into the kitchen with his and Wyatt’s dishes.

  “Berkeley’s great. Especially since they’re having a baby. I don’t know if Mom could have handled her first grandchild living a continent away.”

  “Yeah. She looked relieved.” Angus rinsed off the dishes, but I caught him glancing at me out of the corner of my eye.

  “I’m fine.” I put the rinsed dishes in the dishwasher.

  “You sure?”

  “Yes. Thank you. You’re sweet.”

  “Don’t call me sweet. I know what sweet means.”

  “This time I really meant sweet.”

  “I’ll never trust you and th
at word, so don’t ever use it on me.”

  I laughed. “Sorry. I promise I meant it in the best possible way.”

  “I don’t care how you meant it. If you want to call me sweet, I’ll be resurrecting your prom pictures.”

  “I don’t believe for one second that you still have those.”

  “Why would I ever get rid of them? Sometimes, when I’m feeling overwhelmed with school or my life isn’t going so well, I pull those out of their safe place and look at them for a while. They always make me feel better. So I’d be careful if I were you, ’cause if you start calling me sweet, those little beauties will suddenly appear on every social media site known to man.” Angus shot me a wicked grin, and I cursed myself for the thousandth time for not tearing the pictures into tiny pieces before I threw them away.

  I’m pretty sure this whole conversation requires a little explanation.

  My first date ever was to a Christmas dance. Keaton, a senior from my biology class asked me out by bringing me a bowl of mini candy bars with a note that said, “It would be ‘sweet’ if you’d go to the Christmas dance with me.” He’d never spoken a word to me before, so I was surprised he knew who I was. I didn’t want to go, but Mom and Dad thought it would be a good way to meet some new people, and they even offered to buy me a new dress and a pair of silver shoes I’d been wanting, so I agreed.

  Keaton was always cracking jokes in class, so by the time the dance arrived, I’d convinced myself I’d probably have fun. We went with two other couples, one had been dating two years and the other had been dating since school started. The other girls were nice enough, but soon I realized something was off. You see, every time I said something, Keaton or one of the other guys would say the word “sweet.”

  “How do you think you did on the biology test?” I’d asked.

  “Okay. That was a sweet test.”

  “I’ll have the fettuccine and vegetables.”

  “I’ve heard their fettuccine is sweet.”

  “Those are sweet shoes,” his friend said, pointing at my silver shoes.

  “Thanks.” For a moment, I’d been proud of my silver shoes, but then Keaton and the guys all snickered, and the guy who’d complimented my shoes punched Keaton in the shoulder. Suddenly I felt self-conscious about my shoes.