Amish Willow

by Samantha Price

  “Well then, where did things go wrong?”

  Valerie swallowed hard. “I knew he had family in Lowville because he used to go there often. He sent me two letters from there and then all of a sudden his letters stopped. The next thing I knew was someone told me they’d read of his wedding announcement in one of the Amish papers. I forget who it was who told me. And that was when I learned that he was getting married. At first I thought there was another Ed Bontrager somewhere and that it couldn’t possibly be my Ed.”

  “Did you get a letter or anything from him explaining what happened?”

  “Nothing! Not a letter, not a phone call, nothing. It was two years later when I was visiting this very community that I saw him again with his new wife and she was pregnant with their first child.”

  Nancy shook her head. “That must’ve been hard.”

  “Dirk asked me to marry him and I said yes because I was trying to bury the pain and I’d found no other way to do it. I thought marriage and another man would take my mind off Ed, but it only made me miserable.”

  “I didn’t think you were happy in your marriage. I just knew something was wrong.”

  “It was a dreadful thing to do, to marry for those reasons. Dirk deserved somebody who loved him. I know that now. My hasty decision just made two people miserable for a very long time. But it served its purpose in that it kept my mind off Ed. I saw him all the time but what we’d had together became a distant memory.”

  “How did it come about that he married Rita?”

  Valerie looked directly into Nancy’s eyes. “He has never told me, even after all this time. I guess he just found that he loved her more than me.”

  “And you think that’s all?”

  “What more can there be?” Valerie asked.

  “That makes sense now. The pieces fit together. Except it seems such a hasty marriage for Ed to marry Rita and not even tell you that he was getting married.”

  “I guess he fell in love. And they had a happy marriage as far as I knew.”

  “I never heard otherwise.” Nancy sat in silence while remembering Ed and Rita. They certainly had seemed to have a happy family.

  “Anyway, it’s all so far in the past it barely matters anymore.”

  “I know that’s not right, Valerie. I know you’re hurt and I’ve always wondered about it.”

  “Maybe it’ll hurt more if I know the truth.”

  Nancy shook her head. “The truth sets us free. Surely you’ll feel better to know than to keep wondering?”

  “Maybe, but don’t trouble yourself over it, Nancy. What’s done is done.”

  Nancy nodded. “I should keep going. I’ve got a lot to do today.”

  “Okay. Denke for stopping by.”

  * * *

  When Nancy got back into the buggy and drove away from Valerie’s house, she wiped away a tear caused by Valerie’s sad story. It was a terrible thing to love someone and then find out they were marrying someone else.

  “How could you do this to her, Ed?” she asked aloud.

  That was a question she needed answered. Figuring Nerida and Rhonda would be in town for some time, she headed to Ed’s workshop. Ed owned a glazier business and did work for all the Amish people, and he serviced a good number of the local townsfolk.

  She would ask him outright what happened and why he didn’t tell Valerie he was getting married. Then a thought occurred to Nancy. There was every possibility that Valerie had misread their relationship. If she hadn’t, Ed had been too cowardly to face Valerie.

  Then again, should she keep out of the whole thing?

  Too often, Hezekiah told her, she meddled in people’s lives and he thought she should just leave things be. But what if it happened to Valerie again? Rhonda was obviously in town for the sole purpose of marrying Ed.

  Since Dirk’s death, Ed and Valerie had grown increasingly close and if there was any chance for Valerie to marry the man she loved, Nancy decided, then she would help things along the best she could.

  When she drew closer to the glass factory and saw Ed’s horse, she was glad he was there. Ed’s horse was distinctive. He was black all over except for one white sock on his right front leg. Nancy secured her horse and walked into the large barn of a workshop. She caught the attention of Jacob, one of Ed’s sons, and waved him over.

  “Hi, Jacob. Is your vadder about?”

  “Yeah, he’s out in the back. I’ll take you through to his office and then tell him you’re here.”

  “Denke.”

  She followed Jacob to a small office away from the noisy factory floor. Someone was sizing glass with a cutting machine and it was making an earsplitting sound.

  Jacob closed the door of the office behind him once Nancy was seated, and the sound was barely audible.

  Still hoping she was doing the right thing, Nancy looked around the bare office. An old wooden desk separated the two chairs, and in one corner of the room sat a small refrigerator with a water dispenser on top.

  Ed swung the door open and walked through. “Nancy, this is a nice surprise. Do you need some glass, or are you visiting?”

  “Neither. I need to discuss something with you. Do you have the time?”

  “I’ve always got time for you, Nancy.”

  He sat down, appearing stiff and rigid. He was nervous about what she was about to ask, that was clear.

  “I’ve just come from Valerie’s.”

  “Is she all right?”

  “Ach jah. She’s quite all right, but … Oh dear, you’ll think I’m being nosey. I need to ask you something, but I’m not doing it for bad reasons or to be a gossip. It’s just that Valerie is a very good friend of mine and I know you two have been getting along so well. The thing is, I need to ask you a question.”

  “What is it?”

  “You don’t have to answer it if you don’t want to.”

  “It must be a very important question if it’s brought you here to see me.”

  “It is. I’ll be blunt.”

  He nodded. “I find that’s always best.”

  “I just talked to Valerie and she told me that long ago she expected that the two of you would marry.” She stared at Ed and saw him shift in his seat. “Did she have things the wrong way around in her head back then?”

  He moved his gaze from her and shook his head. “Nee. We were heading for marriage.”

  “Why didn’t it happen?”

  “Because I married Rita.”

  “I know that, but Valerie feels she is owed, or she was owed, some kind of explanation. You never told her you’d fallen in love with someone else. She was shocked to hear it from somebody else.” Nancy put a hand on the wooden desk, hoping Ed would take everything she said okay and wouldn’t take offence.

  “Did she ask you to come here?”

  “Nee. She only told me this because I was probing. I know you two like one another and I just want you both to be happy. She would never ask me to talk to you on her behalf—never. Valerie holds her feelings close to her heart.”

  Chapter 19

  Ed looked down at the swirling patterns of wood grain on the desk in front of him. What could he have said to Valerie? He certainly couldn’t have told her the truth. The secret was not his to tell. It wouldn’t have been the truth to tell her he was in love with someone else because he wasn’t. He’d only ever loved Valerie, but he’d had to put her out of his mind and learn to love the woman he was married to and that’s what he’d done. He grew to love Rita, and they were happy together and they raised a happy family.

  “Ed?”

  He looked back up at Nancy.

  “Why didn’t you talk to her about it?” she asked.

  If Nancy was demanding an answer, how much more was Valerie wondering about the matter? “It was a long time ago. I didn’t tell her and then, as the time went on, I was married and a conversation with Valerie about our previous relationship would’ve been wrong. You’re right, though. I should’ve said something back then, bef
ore I married Rita.”

  “I don’t think it’s in the past for Valerie.”

  He’d failed the woman he loved. “I didn’t realize.”

  “It’s still something that … well, I believe it’s something that she still hangs onto.”

  Now it made sense to Ed that Valerie was still hurt about the past, and that’s why she hadn’t been receptive when he mentioned their future together.

  “Every woman wants to feel special, Ed,” Nancy said. “Not telling her you were going to marry Rita made her feel worthless—like you didn’t care enough to tell her. Didn’t you owe her that, simply as a courtesy?”

  Ed nodded. He knew it must’ve hit Valerie hard when she learned about his marriage, but at the time he hadn’t been able to find the words to tell her.

  “Ed.”

  He looked up at Nancy. “Jah?”

  “Did you bring Rhonda here so you could marry her?”

  “Absolutely not. That is the furthest thing from my mind. She’s Rita’s schweschder. Why would you ask?” He saw Nancy raise her eyebrows, and that confirmed his suspicion that Rhonda must’ve had marriage on her mind. He shook his head. “Is that why she’s here?”

  “I believe so. I don’t know for certain, but I’m not often wrong on these matters. That’s why I’m here. I didn’t want anything to get in your way with Valerie, if that’s where you both were headed.”

  He rubbed a hand over the stubble on his chin. He’d shaved off his beard a year ago. Amish men only grew their beards after marriage, and Ed had shaved his off to let Valerie know he was ready to marry again.

  “What should I do about this, Nancy? I don’t want to hurt any more people, and I have no interest in Rhonda apart from helping her as a member of my familye.”

  “In matters like these, Ed, someone’s always going to end up hurt. But they get hurt more if they don’t know the truth from the beginning. All you have to do is follow your heart and be honest with everybody and let everyone know what’s going on. I’m not sure why you married Rita, and it’s none of my business, but I believe that Valerie is owed an apology about you not telling her yourself. Doesn’t she deserve that?”

  “Jah, she deserves ... that, and a whole lot more.”

  “Gut.”

  “Denke for coming here today and nudging me onto the right path.”

  Nancy giggled. “We all need a little nudge every now and again. It’s a lot easier to look upon someone else’s life and see what they should be doing. It’s a lot harder to look at yourself.”

  “I know what you mean.”

  Nancy rose to her feet. “You’re coming to Valerie’s birthday dinner, I hope?”

  “I am. Tuesday night?”

  “Jah.”

  “I’ll be there.”

  * * *

  Nancy arrived home to see Nerida’s buggy near the barn. Not knowing if she was going out again shortly or not, Nancy secured her horse and walked into the house. There, in her kitchen, she found Rhonda and Nerida eating takeout chicken and French fries.

  “I bought you some, too, Nancy. It’s sitting in the oven keeping warm. Rhonda and I have been out.”

  “Denke.” Nancy got the takeout from the oven and sat down with them. “Where did you go?” Nancy asked.

  “We headed to town, to the stores.”

  “And then I saw a real estate office,” Rhonda added. “We ended up having a look at two houses and I bought one of them.”

  Nancy looked up and gulped. That was the last thing she had expected. “You bought one that quickly?”

  “I put an offer in and it was accepted. I’m signing the paperwork tomorrow.”

  “Already? So soon?”

  “I sold my haus before I moved here, so it’s all fallen nicely into place.”

  “I didn’t know you’d sold your place. I thought you said you were looking at the community, to see if you even wanted to live here,” Nancy said. That’s what she’d told them.

  “I’ve been here before and this is where I’ve decided I want to live. My mind was already made up.”

  “I see. Well, that’s good then. We’re very happy to have you here.”

  When she finished eating, Rhonda looked down. “I must wash all this grease off my hands.”

  Once Rhonda was out of the kitchen and inside the bathroom, Nancy leaned over toward Nerida. “How could you let this happen?”

  “I couldn’t help it. She kept taking me around to look in the windows of the real estate agents. And then a young man came out of an office when we were by the window and asked what we were looking for. The next thing I knew, we were in his car looking at houses.”

  Nancy shook her head.

  “Don’t get mad at me.” Nerida made a face and touched her belly.

  “Are you all right?”

  “Just a pain.”

  “It looks like a pretty bad pain.”

  “I’ve had them all day.”

  “You should go to the doctor and have it checked out.”

  “Maybe you’re right. If it doesn’t ease up, I’ll go to the doctor first thing in the morning.”

  Nancy shook her head. “A pregnancy at your age is a delicate thing. You can’t take any chances. I’m driving you to the doctor now.”

  Rhonda overheard when she came back in the room. “What’s wrong, Nerida?”

  “I’ve been having pains on and off all day.”

  “You should’ve said something.”

  Nerida shrugged. “I thought they’d go away.”

  “We’ll go in my buggy. Would you like to come with us, Rhonda?”

  “Nee, denke. Since your buggy will be here, Nerida, do you mind if I borrow it?”

  “Of course I don’t mind. That’s fine.”

  “I won’t go far. I thought I would just pay a quick visit to Valerie.”

  * * *

  Nancy called ahead and let the doctor know that they were coming.

  “Now you’ve got me worried. Do you think there’s a problem?”

  “We’ll soon find out. I hope there’s nothing wrong. You could be having twins.”

  Nerida whipped her head around to look at her sister. “Do you think so?”

  “It’s possible. They say it runs in families, and since I had twins, you might, too.”

  “Two babies equals double the work,” Nerida said.

  “Double the joy,” Nancy added with a laugh.

  “That’s true. John would be delighted to have twins. And they’d be playmates.”

  “Don’t get your hopes up.”

  “I won’t. It had crossed my mind a while ago that I might have twins, but I hadn’t considered it lately.”

  “Anyway, have you thought of any names?”

  “I’ve considered a lot of names, but I don’t have any firm favorites yet. Do you have any suggestions?”

  “Are you going to continue with my flower theme?” Nancy gave her sister a sidelong glance.

  Nerida had borrowed Nancy’s idea of calling her girls after flowers and the fact that she’d done that without telling Nancy first had caused a years-long rift between the pair. What Nerida should’ve done, Nancy thought, was asked her if she minded if she copied her flower theme.

  “Maybe I’ll continue with that theme. I’ve got Violet and Willow, so something that goes with those names would be good.”

  “Tell me some of the names you’ve thought of,” Nancy said.

  “I can’t think of them off the top of my head.”

  “Think of them now. I’ll be quiet a moment.”

  “I keep thinking I’m having a girl. I have to keep reminding myself it might be a boy.”

  “And you’re thinking that there are no flower names for boys?”

  Nerida giggled. “You’re obsessed with your flower theme, aren’t you? Would it worry you that much if I called my baby after a flower?”

  “I would just like you to admit that you copied me like you always have since you’ve been born.”

&nbs
p; “Don’t you realize that that’s a compliment, that I copied everything you did?”

  Nancy shook her head. “I didn’t see it as a compliment. I saw it as an infringement—stepping across the line.”

  “But haven’t we gotten past that? I thought we were forgiving and forgetting and moving onward.”

  “You having another boppli has brought it all to the fore.”

  “Would you be happy if I agreed to call my boppli something that doesn’t resemble a flower?”

  “Ach nee. You’re not playing that trick with me.” Nancy wagged a finger at Nerida.

  “What are you talking about? I’m not playing any game or trick. Anyway, can’t John and I call our boppli anything we want, or do we have to check with you?”

  “I just want you to be open with me. I don’t want to find out … I don’t want to be the last to find out that you’ve called your daughter a flower name. Something like Heather, or Jasmine, or Marigold.”

  “Denke. Those are some nice names. I like the name Heather. What will I do if I have a boy? There are no flower boys’ names.”

  “I think there are. I didn’t call my sons flower names. I only thought of it when Rose came along. Otherwise, I would’ve called one of them Cedar. It’s a strong, manly name. And then there’s Basil. Or Heath.”

  “Those are all nice names.”

  “So, then, are you saying that you will give your baby a flower name, or not?”

  Since there was no traffic on the road, Nancy stared at her sister while giving the horse his head, allowing him to make his own way up the road.

  “I don’t want to cause any trouble between us, Nancy. There’s already been too much trouble and too many years that we spent not talking to each other over this silly thing.”

  “It wasn’t silly to me.”

  “Of course it was silly, and still is. You don’t own any names. Even if I decided to call my child Rose, it doesn’t matter because you don’t own that name.”

  “Are you considering calling your child the same name as one of my daughters?”