by Lexi Blake
But those were all excuses. She shimmied out of her shorts, tossing them aside, too. His brain was coming up with a million reasons he could still have her, but there was one he wouldn’t acknowledge. There was only one reason he could still want her.
He still cared deep down. Josh was the type of man who could easily turn off his emotions. She’d watched him do it. Why hadn’t he been able to do it with her?
If there was even a spark of feeling for her left in his soul, she had a chance. She could use sex to bind him, to keep that little flame alive so it could grow again.
But she wouldn’t do that by fighting him. No. She had to play this his way. “I’ll be waiting for my Master. Waiting to give you comfort in any way you need.”
She started to move past him, but one hand came out, tangling in her hair and tugging her close. Her belly brushed against his cock and his eyes closed briefly.
“Anything?” The word was a challenge.
Now she could see him for what he was. An angry, wounded predator who couldn’t quite eat his prey. He couldn’t make himself let go. This was the only way he could have her. But wounds could heal and they had some time. “Anything.”
He leaned in. “What does that make you?”
She was sure there were a ton of nasty words going through his head in answer to that question. Whore. Slut. Skank. Prostitute. But there was only one word for her. “Yours, Joshua. It makes me yours.”
He didn’t seem to have a pithy comeback for that and released her. “Go clean yourself up. I’ll be there in a minute. I mean it, Kay. Anything I want.”
“Anything.”
As she walked into the gorgeous bathroom, she was feeling better. Her lion was roaring and she wasn’t going to come out of this without some wounds of her own, but she healed fast. And he wasn’t throwing her out.
She still had a shot and she was going to take it.
* * * *
What the hell was he doing? He hated her. It sat in his belly like a sickening anchor, weighing him down. He hated her and his cock still hardened at the mere thought of her. He hadn’t locked the door because he’d known damn well she would come looking for him. He fucking wanted her to find him, to see him without a stitch on, and then he was going to order her to her own room where she could fuck herself.
And the instant he’d caught sight of her, her eyes red from crying—fucking crocodile tears—he’d known he wasn’t about to let her off that easy. She owed him. That was it. She’d signed a contract and she owed him obedience and sex. He’d gotten a bunch of anger out sparring with Declan, but it was rushing back in and he could let it fester or find another way to cope.
His cock knew exactly what it wanted.
He would still throw her out. He would still get rid of her because she was a liar and a manipulator and the worst kind of woman, but as long as she was here, why not use her for what she was good for?
Every muscle ached, but nothing worse than his…god, he couldn’t even think that word. Couldn’t give her that much control over him. He’d been stupid. He’d known she was too good to be true and guess what?
But some of what Declan and Shane said had pierced through his rage. There was an agent out there who had likely been killed in action, and Josh’s connections were the only way to get to the truth. He might hate the way the CIA had gone about it, but could he really not try to help?
They’d also talked about getting his privacy back, ensuring no one ever heard that tape. He was in the same position with the Agency as he was with his blackmailer. They had him by the balls.
But Kayla needed him and he fully intended to use that to his advantage.
He would use her for what he’d brought her in for in the first place. Sex and submission.
He stalked into the shower. It was a monstrosity of a shower with natural rock and an open entrance. He stopped as the marble of the floor gave way to the tile of the shower. Despite the fact that she’d ripped his world apart with those well-manicured hands of hers, his breath caught because she was the single most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. She was graceful and slender, her long raven-black hair falling to brush against the cheeks of her ass. Her face was turned up to the hot water as though it could wash away her sins.
Nothing could, but he could damn well do some sinning of his own.
Her eyes came up, big and guileless. She’d been built to do what she did, to seduce men into giving her their secrets, to manipulate powerful people into doing what she wanted. So sweet and innocent. No one would believe she could do what she was capable of.
“Please don’t look at me like I’m a monster,” she said quietly.
Wasn’t she? A gorgeous, sleek and deadly predator. She certainly managed to mangle him with her delicate claws. “I thought you didn’t want our listening audience to know there was anything wrong.”
“There’s no device in here,” she replied. “And it’s too big to let the one in your room pick up our conversation. They can’t hear us on the balcony either. They tried, but the ambient sound is too much.”
The surf was quite overpowering at certain times of the day. “So I can say what I like in here?”
“Sure. Light me up, Josh. I still won’t leave you.”
He’d called her enough nasty names for the day. “I thought I would go over the new rules. I was indulgent with you before.”
“I thought we’d gotten those out of the way,” she replied. If it bothered her to be nude in front of him, she didn’t show it. But then again her body was her greatest weapon. It was certainly working against him. His cock was aching for her. “I’m to obey you in all things if I want to stay around. I told you. Anything you want, Joshua.”
“Except if I want you gone.”
“Except that.” She stepped close to him, her chin tilting up. “I’ll be gone soon enough if that’s what you want. I’ll be gone the minute the op is over, but you should understand that won’t be what I want. I want to stay with you.”
“Yes, I can see you’ve gotten used to the lifestyle.”
“I’ve gotten used to loving you.”
“My first rule,” he ground out between clenched teeth, “is that you never use that word around me again.”
“Just because I don’t say it doesn’t mean it isn’t true.” Her eyes closed and she dropped down in front of him. Her slender, luscious body found her submissive position. On her knees, legs splayed, head down. “I submit to my Master. I give him the control he needs and I trust him not to hurt me.”
“Then you’re a fool.” He would hurt her. He would hurt her in every way and enjoy each moment of her pain. But not before he’d had his pleasure. “You’re honestly telling me you’ll still fuck me?”
Her head didn’t come up. “Yes, Joshua. I still want you.”
Damn if he didn’t want her, too. “You will get nothing from this. Nothing but incidental pleasure because from this moment on you mean nothing to me. You are nothing but a lovely body for me to use. Do you understand?”
“Yes.”
Why the fuck wasn’t she running? Why wasn’t she slapping the fool out of him and telling him to keep his cock to himself? “Tell me something, Kay. Did it bother you to have to fuck me? Did you clean yourself up after I came inside you?”
Now that head came up, her eyes confused. “What?”
“I’m filthy.” He stroked his cock as if he needed that evidence to make his case. “Do you have any idea where this has been? How dirty I am?”
She stood up and her hand came out, smacking the shit out of him. “Don’t you ever say that about yourself. Never again. I’ll take a lot of crap from you, but not that. Never that.”
He didn’t understand her, couldn’t comprehend what kind of game she was playing, but he couldn’t seem to stop taking his turn. He should walk away. His whole body ached, but all he could do was push her further. “Suck it, sub. Get back down on your knees and prove it. Suck my cock like it means something to you.”
&
nbsp; Why had he said that? He didn’t fucking care if it meant a thing. He didn’t care about her at all. This was about getting back some of his own.
So why did something settle deep inside when she dropped to her knees and rubbed her cheek against his cock? That wasn’t what he’d asked for. He’d told her to suck it and expected her to immediately drag his cock into that hot mouth of hers, to show off all her skills so he would keep her around another day.
She didn’t jump on the porn star performance. No, not Kay. She had to be different, had to be weird. She rubbed her cheek against his dick and then breathed him in like she couldn’t get enough of how he smelled. She ran her nose over him, reveling in him before starting in on the butterfly kisses.
It was pure torture and it was right there on the tip of his tongue to command her again. He could reach out and wrap his hands in all that hair of hers, tangling it in his fingers and taking control of her. He could force his dick into her mouth and throat fuck her until he came hard, never letting up until she’d swallowed him dry. Then he would wash himself and tell her to get out. If she wanted to get clean, she could do it in her shower. He’d tell her he was done with her and go to bed early, avoiding her the rest of the day.
Except he simply stared down at her, watching as she worshipped his cock, lavishing him not with some lusty manipulation, but with sweet affection. She pressed kisses along his stalk as her small hand reached up and cupped his balls. After she kissed his length, her tongue finally made an appearance and he groaned at the feel. Heat pulsed through his system. He stared down, watching as she took that first pass, her tongue lapping up the weeping arousal on the tip of his dick. She sighed as though she loved the taste.
Good. She was incredibly good at pulling him in, at making him believe she meant everything she said and did. He could almost believe she loved this, loved his cock, and everything she was offering him was truth.
Then she sucked him behind her lips and he didn’t give a fuck. Her tongue whirled around his cockhead, sucking lightly, and he couldn’t breathe. She’d barely started and he could feel the need to come pounding at him.
Her hands grazed up his legs as she held his cock deep in her mouth. This was what fucking Kayla was like. It was like she couldn’t get enough of him. She gave and gave until he rolled her over and pinned her down, forcing her to take her pleasure, too. His sexuality was complex and stained with what had happened, but he forgot everything when he was with her.
Why couldn’t she have been real?
His hands found her hair, but she was drawing all the anger out of him and leaving him with nothing but pleasure and this aching wish in his soul that today hadn’t happened, that this was some bad dream and he would wake up beside her and this time he wouldn’t go meet Tyler Williams. He would choose again. He would go to brunch and laugh with Jared and get lectured by her dads and he would eat carbs and kiss her madly even when everyone was looking.
He petted her hair as she sucked him, her mouth working him over. Somehow even as she took his cock deep, there was a sweetness to the act that had been absent with every woman before, a sense that this wasn’t some simple exchange, that this was connection.
A connection he would have to cut. A connection that had only ever gone one way.
He pulled on her hair because if she kept it up, he would come straight down her throat. That had been the plan, but then all his plans got blown up. He was an idiot and he had so little time left with her. He would give her up at the end. He would send her away, but not tonight. Not tonight.
“Get up.”
She sucked him one last time. “Josh, let me finish. I want to.”
She needed to learn to listen to him now that she was primarily his submissive. “And I told you to get up. The only reason I’m not spanking you is that I don’t trust myself not to hurt you. Turn around and put your hands on the tile and spread your legs.”
Her eyes flared. “Really?” She shook her head, beginning to turn. “I mean, yes. Yes, Joshua.”
She placed her hands flat on the tile and offered up her delicious body.
He was too hungry to play, too needy to tease. He moved in behind her, letting his dick play through her pussy. Wet. The woman always got so fucking wet for him. They’d tossed out the condoms when their blood work had come back clean. She was on long-term birth control.
Or she could be lying about that, too. She could try to keep her lifestyle that way, get him to knock her up. He should get a condom, but his cock was already thrusting inside.
If he did get her pregnant, he wouldn’t be able to kick her out. He would be caught.
He thrust deep inside, forgetting about everything but how tight she was around him, how silky smooth the glide was as she accommodated him. He held her hips as he moved in and out. Every muscle ached, but he didn’t care. All that mattered was where they connected, his hands on her hips, his cock deep inside. He was alive there. The rest could rot for all he cared. This was where he lived.
He reached around and found her slick clitoris, pressing down and starting a slow slide. He was too tuned up. The emotion of the day pressed in and shot his control, but he would be damned if he would go over without her. All thoughts of causing her pain had fled, replaced with the idea of making her hurt as much as he was. She would miss this, miss him. She would never find another lover who could do this to her.
Yeah, he could do that. He could take these last days and fuck her so long and hard and true that she could never find another man to satisfy her.
“Josh. Please, Josh.” Her throaty cries filled the shower and he wished everyone on the planet could hear that.
He knew what she wanted and pressed down hard while he thrust in as far as he could, let loose with his release. He pounded into her as she clenched him tight, milking every drop he had inside him. Fuck fighting. He’d needed this.
“Josh.” She said his name like a benediction.
He held her against him, his cock slipping out, but still warm against her. “It doesn’t mean anything.”
She sighed, but let her head come back, resting against his chest as he fondled her breasts. “Then let me clean you up, Master. If it doesn’t mean anything, then it’s all right to let me do it.”
He was still as she grabbed the soap and started moving her hands over his body, washing him clean.
It didn’t mean anything, he told himself. He closed his eyes against the sight of her serving him.
It didn’t mean a fucking thing.
Chapter Sixteen
The next day as he sat in The Reef’s small conference room, Josh had to admit the big guy had presence. The smaller guy in the suit had style. The other guy was half asleep.
These were Kayla’s coworkers and it was exactly like he’d thought. Her delicate beauty didn’t fit with these hulking, massive men.
“I’m Ian Taggart,” the biggest of the men said as he settled into a chair opposite Josh. “Yolo McSwaggins here is named Adam Miles, and Sleeping Beauty is my business partner, Alex McKay. Don’t mind Alex. He recently adopted a second child and then his sperm totally went on a hyper salmon run and his wife turns up pregnant. They went from no kids to looking at having three under the age of five. Welcome to my world, buddy. I’m pretty sure he’s here because he thought he could get some sleep.”
Alex McKay’s middle finger made an appearance and he sat up and stretched. “I’m here because I don’t trust you to not piss off the dude who could sue us. This is going to require some subtlety.”
The third man smiled, a smooth expression. “And I’m here because I’m the brains. Adam Miles, head of Miles-Dean, Weston and Murdoch Investigative Services.” He turned to Taggart. “Yolo McSwaggins? Where the fuck do you get this shit? Do you troll Urban Dictionary?” He obviously didn’t need an answer as he immediately turned back to Josh. “Mr. Hunt, I’m happy to meet you. I’m a big fan.”
Wow. It was weird. He knew these dudes even though he hadn’t met these dudes. It was
like watching a movie but the faces had changed from the actors playing the roles to the real live people. He couldn’t help it, but he had to look to Kayla. He’d meant to ignore her completely. After the shower incident the previous night, he’d ignored her the rest of the evening. Well, until it had been time to go to bed. Then he’d shown up at her door and practically fallen on top of her when she opened her arms. While they’d been fucking—he wasn’t going to call it by the other term—he’d been content. The minute he’d rolled off her, he’d wanted to go to sleep, her small body wrapped up in his like some super-sexy teddy bear he clung to to keep the bad dreams away. He’d forced himself to get up and walk back to his own bed where he’d sat and watched the ceiling most of the night.
But he couldn’t ignore her now because she had answers. He caught her eye. “Pierce Craig?”
He’d totally seen this movie. The big Viking who was made of sarcasm was obviously Pierce Craig from the movie Love After Death. Jared had almost played that role. Josh had been the one to sit by as Jared had dissected everything the actor who’d gotten the role after him had done wrong. Funny, it was hard to see his soft-hearted friend playing the massive ex-Special Forces soldier.
Kayla’s lips curled up, though he noted the smile didn’t reach her eyes. “Yes, and Axel and Zan. I think they’re shooting Zan and Ava’s movie in a couple of months.”
“I am not Zan.” McKay yawned discreetly behind his hand and frowned Miles’s way. “Couldn’t Serena come up with a more manly name? I sound like I should be in a sci-fi movie. You know if I’d known she was going to turn around and write a freaking book about my life, I would never have told her that story.”
Miles shrugged. “Yeah, she was there. How quickly they forget. She kind of saved your ass, so you owed her.”
The big guy frowned. “Wait. Are you trying to tell me I’m actually Pierce Craig?” His face went still. “Holy shit. She did. That’s my story. Huh. At least they got a handsome bastard to play me. Adam, I’m going to need a cut of that.”
