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Change Your Thoughts—Change Your Life

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by Wayne W. Dyer


  Do the Tao Now

  As many times as possible today, decide to approach interactions or situations involving other people with a completely fair mind-set, which you allow and trust to guide your responses. Do this as often as you can for an entire day with individuals, groups, friends, family members, or strangers. Create a short sentence that you silently repeat to continually remind yourself that you’re approaching this situation with an unbiased attitude, such as Guide me right now, Tao; Holy Spirit, guide me now; or Holy Spirit, help us now. Keeping this brief sentence on a loop in your mind will prevent judgment from habitually surfacing—but even more appealing is the feeling of relaxation and openness to whatever wants to happen in those moments of impartiality.

  6th Verse

  The spirit that never dies

  is called the mysterious feminine.

  Although she becomes the whole universe,

  her immaculate purity is never lost.

  Although she assumes countless forms,

  her true identity remains intact.

  The gateway to the mysterious female

  is called the root of creation.

  Listen to her voice,

  hear it echo through creation.

  Without fail, she reveals her presence.

  Without fail, she brings us to our own perfection.

  Although it is invisible, it endures;

  it will never end.

  Living Creatively

  In this 6th verse, Lao-tzu refers to an eternal and indescribable force of creation that continuously gives birth to new life. He tells us that this “mysterious female” energy continually reveals itself in perfection, and he invites us to an awareness of that voice of creation echoing throughout life in myriad ways. “Living creatively” is how I describe existing with a conscious awareness of the presence of this feminine principle.

  This mysterious female is always birthing, and the Tao Te Ching speaks of the gateway to her as the “root of creation.” It’s telling us that we have the ability to tap into this unlimited field and co-create, or as I’ve said, live creatively through the Tao. The never– dying formative energy is both our heritage and our destiny, functioning whether we’re conscious of it or not. What awareness accomplishes, through practicing the Tao, is to let us participate in the process—which in turn leads us toward the wholeness that is our ultimate earthbound task.

  Although his writings are almost 3,000 years old, Lao-tzu is offering 21st-century advice here, with a message that’s as timeless and never-ending as the Tao itself. Words may change, but be assured that the feminine energy can and will bring you to your own perfection. If you choose to be aware of the inherent creativity that resonates deep within you, where the invisible Tao sings the loudest, you’ll assist the birthing of new ideas, new accomplishments, new projects, and new ways of understanding your life.

  In Deng Ming-Dao’s 365 Tao: Daily Meditations, the Divine feminine energy is equated with the sound of birds soaring and gliding over a vast landscape:

  You can feel this in your life: Events will take on a perfect momentum, a glorious cadence. You can feel it in your body: The energy will rise up in you in a thrilling crescendo, setting your very nerves aglow. You can feel it in your spirit: You will enter a state of such perfect grace that you will resound over the landscape of reality like ephemeral bird song.

  When Tao comes to you in this way, ride it for all that you are worth. Don’t interfere. Don’t stop. . . . Don’t try to direct it. Let it flow and follow it. . . . As long as the song lasts, follow. Just follow.

  Here are some thoughts for living creatively:

  Know that you are a Divine creation birthed, not by your parents, but by the great spritual Divine Mother, the Tao.

  When you’re in touch with the energy of your origin, you offer the world your authentic intelligence, talents, and behaviors. You’re co-creating with the you that originated in the Tao, with the very measure of your essence.

  The Tao is not confused about what to create and how to go about it, as this is your legacy from the mysterious feminine. Listen to your inner callings, ignore how others might want to direct your life energies, and allow yourself to radiate outward what you feel so profoundly and deeply within you. There is a reservoir of talent, ability, and intelligence inside of you that’s as endless and inexhaustible as the Tao itself. It must be that way, because you are what you came from, and where you came from is this all-encompassing, endlessly creative Divine Mother, the mysterious feminine of the Tao.

  Whatever you feel within you as your calling—whatever makes you feel alive—know in your heart that this excitement is all the evidence you need to have your inner passion become reality. This is precisely how creation works . . . and it’s that energy that harmonizes with the Tao.

  Be creative—in your thoughts, in your feelings, and in all of your actions. Apply your own uniqueness to everything you undertake.

  Whatever you feel compelled to do—be it write music, design software, do floral arrangements, clean teeth, or drive a taxi—do it with your unique flair. Being creative means trusting your inner calling, ignoring criticism or judgment, and releasing resistance to your natural talents. Reread this 6th verse, paying particular attention to these words: “Without fail, she reveals her presence. Without fail, she brings us to our own perfection.” Then choose to let go of the doubt and fear you’ve harbored within you regarding your capacity to harmonize with the creative power—a power that’s not only greater than your individual life, but is life itself.

  As the great 14th-century Sufi poet Hafiz reminds all of us:

  Just sit there right now

  Don’t do a thing

  Just rest.

  For your separation from God,

  From love,

  Is the hardest work

  In this

  World.

  When you reconnect to your Divine Mother, you’ll be living creatively. You will, in fact, be living the Tao!

  Do the Tao Now

  Today, notice babies and small children. Look for the mysterious feminine nature in little boys and girls who haven’t yet become so attuned to cultural and societal demands that their true selves are hidden. Can you see some whose inherent nature is intact? Notice what seems to be their natural character, or their gift from the Tao. Then try to recall yourself as a child, when the natural, Tao-given self was unaware of the ego-self—the time before you believed that acquisitions or power were important. Who were you? Who are you?

  Yes, today spend a few moments with a young child and contemplate his or her connection to the Tao and how it unfolds perfectly without any interference.

  7th Verse

  Heaven is eternal—the earth endures.

  Why do heaven and earth last forever?

  They do not live for themselves only.

  This is the secret of their durability.

  For this reason the sage puts himself last

  and so ends up ahead.

  He stays a witness to life,

  so he endures.

  Serve the needs of others,

  and all your own needs will be fulfilled.

  Through selfless action, fulfillment is attained.

  Living Beyond Ego

  The opening line of this 7th verse of the Tao Te Ching is a reminder that the Tao, the Source of heaven and earth, is eternal. By extension, the original nature of life is everlasting and enduring. There is a quality that supports this durability, however, and that quality responds when we live from our Tao center, rather than from our worldly ego center. Identifying exclusively with the physicality of life—and basing our existence on acquiring and achieving things—disregards our infinite nature and limits our awareness of Taoness. In such a finite system, it therefore seems logical to strive for possessions and accomplishments.

  Being civilized in most cultures primarily constitutes being consumed with attaining “success” in the acquisition of power and things, which supposedly will provi
de happiness and prevent unhappiness. The primary idea is of a self who’s a separate being in a separate body, with a name, and with cultural and biological data that are similar in values and patriotism to others. The Tao, particularly in this 7th verse, is suggesting that we update those notions and choose to exist for more than ourselves or our tribe—that is, to radically change our thoughts in order to change our lives.

  Lao-tzu says the secret of the ineffable nature of the eternal Tao is that it isn’t identified with possessions or in asking anything of its endless creations. The Tao is a giving machine that never runs out of gifts to offer, yet it asks nothing in return. Because of this natural tendency to live for others, the Tao teaches that it can never die. Giving and immortality then go hand in hand.

  The sage who grasps the everlasting nature of the Tao has gone beyond false identification with the ego, and instead has a living connection to the Tao. This person puts others first, asks nothing in return, and wholeheartedly serves. In this way, the sage lives the ultimate paradox of the Tao—by giving without asking, he attracts everything that he’s capable of handling or needing. By putting himself last, the sage ends up ahead. By putting others before himself, he endures just like the Tao. The sage emulates the natural philanthropy of the Tao, and all of his needs are fulfilled in the process.

  The ego is a demanding force that’s never satisfied: It constantly requires that we seek more money, power, acquisitions, glory, and prestige to provide the fuel it thinks it must have. Living a Tao-centered life rather than an ego-centered one removes us from that rat race, as it offers inner peace and satisfying fulfillment.

  This is what I believe the wisdom of this verse of the Tao Te Ching is saying for the 21st century:

  Make an attempt to reverse ego’s hold on you by practicing the Tao’s teaching to “serve the needs of others, and all your own needs will be fulfilled.”

  Generously thinking of and serving others will lead to matching your behaviors with the perpetual rhythm of the Tao—then its power will flow freely, leading to a fulfilling life. Ego wants the opposite, however, as it tells you to think of yourself first and “get yours” before someone else beats you to it. The main problem with listening to ego is that you’re always caught in the trap of striving and never arriving. Thus, you can never feel complete.

  As you reach out in thoughts and behaviors, you activate loving energy, which is synonymous with giving. Put others ahead of you in as many ways as possible by affirming: I see the sacred invisible Source of all in its eternal state of giving and asking nothing in return. I vow to be this, too, in my thoughts and behaviors.

  When you’re tempted to focus on your personal successes and defeats, shift your attention in that very moment to a less fortunate individual. You’ll feel more connected to life, as well as more satisfied than when you’re dwelling on your own circumstances. Imagine what it would be like if you dismissed ego’s hold on you. Serve others and watch how all that you give returns to you tenfold.

  The poet Hafiz expresses this attitude perfectly:

  Everyone

  Is God speaking.

  Why not be polite and

  Listen to

  Him?

  Stop the chase and be a witness.

  The more you pursue desires, the more they’ll elude you. Try letting life come to you and begin to notice the clues that what you crave is on its way. You’re in a constant state of receiving because of the ceaseless generosity of the eternal Tao. The air you breathe, the water you drink, the food you eat, the sunshine that warms you, the nutrients that keep your body alive, and even the thoughts that fill your mind are all gifts from the eternal Tao. Stay appreciative of all that you receive, knowing that it flows from an all-providing Source. Stop the chase and become a witness—soothe your demanding habits by refusing to continue running after more. By letting go, you let God; and even more significantly, you become more like God and less like the ego, with its lifetime practice of edging God out.

  Do the Tao Now

  Be on the lookout for ego demands for an entire day. Decide to defuse as many of them as you can comfortably, perhaps by assigning them an “intensity grade.” Living beyond ego situations that are easy to accomplish get a low number, while those requests that are difficult to quell get a higher number.

  For example, let’s say that your spouse is driving a car in which you are a passenger. You see the perfect parking space, but your mate drives right on by; or you watch him or her take a different route than you ordinarily do. Silently witness the degree of discomfort with your decision not to say anything. Did ego let you know its preference?

  Or if you have a conversational opportunity to display your specialized knowledge or describe a situation wherein you were the recipient of honor or success, note how uncomfortable your decision to remain quiet felt. Again, did ego let you know its preference? As Lao-tzu says in this verse, “Through selfless action, fulfillment is attained.” By holding back ego’s demands, even for a few moments, you will feel more and more fulfilled.

  8th Verse

  The supreme good is like water,

  which nourishes all things without trying to.

  It flows to low places loathed by all men.

  Therefore, it is like the Tao.

  Live in accordance with the nature of things.

  In dwelling, be close to the land.

  In meditation, go deep in the heart.

  In dealing with others, be gentle and kind.

  Stand by your word.

  Govern with equity.

  Be timely in choosing the right moment.

  One who lives in accordance with nature

  does not go against the way of things.

  He moves in harmony with the present moment,

  always knowing the truth of just what to do.

  Living in the Flow

  The Tao and water are synonymous according to the teachings of Lao-tzu. You are water; water is you. Think about the first nine months of your life after conception: You lived in, and were nourished by, amniotic fluid, which is truly unconditional love flowing into you . . . flowing as you. You are now 75 percent water (and your brain is 85 percent), and the rest is simply muscled water.

  Think about the mysterious magical nature of this liquid energy that we take for granted. Try to squeeze it, and it eludes us; relax our hands into it, and we experience it readily. If it stays stationary, it will become stagnant; if it is allowed to flow, it will stay pure. It does not seek the high spots to be above it all, but settles for the lowest places. It gathers into rivers, lakes, and streams; courses to the sea; and then evaporates to fall again as rain. It maps out nothing and it plays no favorites: It doesn’t intend to provide sustenance to the animals and plants. It has no plans to irrigate the fields; to slake our thirst; or to provide the opportunity to swim, sail, ski, and scuba dive. These are some of the benefits that come naturally from water simply doing what it does and being what it is.

  The Tao asks you to clearly see the parallels between you and this naturally flowing substance that allows life to sustain itself. Live as water lives, since you are water. Become as contented as is the fluid that animates and supports you. Let your thoughts and behaviors move smoothly in accordance with the nature of all things. It is natural for you to be gentle, to allow others to be free to go where they’re inclined to go, and to be as they need to be without interference from you. It is natural to trust in the eternal flow, be true to your inner inclinations, and stick to your word. It is natural to treat everyone as an equal. All of these lessons can be derived by observing how water, which sustains all life, behaves. It simply moves, and the benefits it provides occur from it being what it is, in harmony with the present moment and knowing the truth of precisely how to behave.

  What follows is what Lao-tzu might say to you, based upon his writing of the 8th verse of the Tao Te Ching:

  When you’re free to flow as water, you’re free to communicate naturally—information is ex
changed, and knowledge advances in a way that benefits everyone.

  Be careful not to assign yourself a place of importance above anyone else. Be receptive to everyone, particularly those who may not routinely receive respect, such as the uneducated, homeless, or troubled members of our society. Go to the “low places loathed by all men,” and have an open mind when you’re there. Look for the Tao in everyone you encounter; and make a special effort to have acceptance, gentleness, and kindness course through you to others.

  By not being irritating, you’ll be received with respect. By making every effort to avoid controlling the lives of others, you’ll be in peaceful harmony with the natural order of the Tao. This is the way you nourish others without trying. Be like water—which creates opportunities for swimming, fishing, surfing, drinking, wading, sprinkling, floating, and an endless list of benefits—by not trying to do anything other than simply flow.

  Let your thoughts float freely.

  Forget about fighting life or trying to be something else; rather, allow yourself to be like the material compound that comprises every aspect of your physical being. In The Hidden Messages in Water, Masaru Emoto explains that we are water, and water wants to be free. The author has thoroughly explored the ways in which this compound reacts, noting that by respecting and loving it, we can 8th Verse literally change its crystallization process. If kept in a container with the words love, thank you, or you’re beautiful imprinted on it, water becomes beautiful radiant crystals. Yet if the words on the container are you fool, Satan, or I will kill you, the crystals break apart, are distorted, and seem confused.

 

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