by Maggie Ryan
“Add ass to that list,” Willamina said as she went to stand toe to toe with her son-in-law. “Christina would be ashamed of you and you know it. What’s done can’t be undone but one act does not need to ruin an entire life.”
“One act? From what I understand, your precious granddaughter has been playing the part of Doulworth’s ladybird for months.”
“You are racking up the adjectives aren’t you, Horace? Now you can add hypocrite. Don’t think for a single moment that I believe you haven’t dipped your wick in quite a variety of fountains since Christina’s death. As salacious as your exploits might be, this is not about you.”
“That’s enough! I won’t stand here and allow you to defile me when I’ve done nothing wrong!”
Willamina sighed deeply. “You’ve turned into a bitter man, caring only for yourself. As much as I mourn my daughter and the grandson that were taken from me, I can’t help but be grateful that she never lived to see you turn into the empty shell of the man you used to be. Either grow a set of balls and work with us or leave us to plan Juliette’s course of action.”
“Convent or whorehouse, I don’t care! I wash my hands of the both of you!”
Juliette stayed in her seat, her luncheon untouched, as she watched her father storm from the room. Not once before in her life had she heard another speak so blatantly to the patriarch of the house. She could barely remember this woman; having only seen her rarely throughout her childhood. What she did remember was that her father had seemed to hate his mother-in-law, perhaps blaming her for producing a daughter too weak to survive childbirth. As for her grandmother, all she remembered was a stately woman who spoke quietly and slipped into her room at night to tell her stories about a mother she would never know.
“Come, my dear,” Willamina said, and without hesitation, the only child of her dear daughter slipped from her chair and ran into her open arms and promptly burst into tears. “Shh, I promise everything will be fine.” The words were softly spoken as Juliette was led into the parlor and pulled down to sit beside her grandmother.
“I-I…” Fresh tears coursed down her face. Willamina patted her cheek and pulled her head to rest on her shoulder.
“Cry. Cry until you can cry no more and then, child, we will discuss how to make sure there is no need for tears in your future.” Juliette did just that, soaking her grandmother’s shoulder with tears of release. By the time she felt as if not a single tear was left to shed, an hour had passed with her thoughts turned inward as she battled for her identity. Sitting up, accepting yet another handkerchief to dry her cheeks, she realized she felt as if she’d shed a weight she’d carried for years. The weight of trying to make her father love her, the weight of disappointing him at every turn—the weight disappeared as she finally accepted the fact that she would not spend another moment on such impossible tasks.
“So, what do you have in mind, Gram?”
“Tea.”
“Tea? How is that going to help my future?”
“Child, you will make your future and I will help. But, you should know that everything is better discussed over a nice cup of tea.”
Juliette smiled for the first time in days. This was something she also remembered vaguely. Her grandmother was a huge fan of tea and all the frills that accompanied a proper tea service. “Of course, Gram. I’ve forgotten as Father does not take the time for tea.”
“Then we can add uncouth to our list, can’t we? Now, make sure you ask for some of those delicious little sandwiches I remember Cook serving. You are far too thin, my dear, so a few of her delicate cakes will also be required. While we wait, you can fill me in on what exactly happened.”
Juliette looked down at the elderly woman. “Your presence suggests you have a very good idea of what happened.”
“My presence is for the exact reason I stated, child. If you think for one moment that I’ll accept any one of the versions floating about, then perhaps you don’t remember that I demand the right to form my own opinion based on the truth.” Shaking her head, she also shook a finger in her granddaughter’s direction. “The truth might not be full of rainbows and sunshine, but by God, it is the only version needing discussion. Before she could speak, her grandmother shook her head. “You shan’t hide the truth either. As the good book states, ‘the truth shall set you free’ and promises that you’ll find liberation from bondage with that truth.” She paused and took Juliette’s hands. “Not a single soul on earth is free of making mistakes. Love is a gift, Juliette, and though yours was tainted with deception, you shall remember it always. Let it teach you more than sorrow—let it teach you how to be strong.”
The two ate every scrap of bread and watercress, not a piece of cucumber or chicken was left and every crumb of the delectable petite fours had been lifted with moistened fingertips and popped into mouths. The food was washed down by cup after cup of tea cooled with cream and sweetened with sugar. Cook Starling herself had appeared as if to make sure that the maid’s request had been correct. She’d been delighted at the prospect of preparing a proper tea and had truly outdone herself.
Groaning, Juliette sat back in her chair, waiting for her grandmother to take her last sip. She’d listened without interruption as Juliette hesitantly began to explain what had happened. As the woman simply nodded, she’d found it almost a relief to explain why she’d been so foolish. Now that the fragile Limoges cup was placed back into its matching saucer and set aside, she said, “I suppose I should have known that my Romeo was nothing but an actor, playing a part.”
“Pshaw,” Willamina said. “Every woman beginning with Eve has wished for her knight in shining armor. Why should you be different?” Shaking her head, she said, “I’m not attempting to placate or excuse your actions. What you did was wrong but you weren’t the first young woman to put the cart before the horse nor will you be the last. I asked you to be honest and I’ll offer you the same respect.”
“Of course, Gram,” Juliette said when Willamina paused.
“Do you ever plan on telling your father the truth?”
“I don’t understand. I told him the truth.”
“No, you didn’t. In fact, I believe you left out quite an important fact. Answer me this, if you will.”
Confused, Juliette nodded. “I’ll try.”
“You had every chance to claim your knight and yet you choose to allow him to escape his responsibilities. Despite what your father might be doing now, from what I understand he would have insisted that ring go on your finger instead of Belinda’s at a single word from you. What I wish to know is why you made the choice you did. Your future would have been vastly different; one that would possibly find your father forgiving your transgression.”
“You’ll think I’ve not a brain in my head, I’m afraid.”
“I think you’ll learn that I believe you are an extremely intelligent young woman,” Willamina refuted.
Standing, Juliette walked to the window, pushing back the curtain and looking out. “I ask myself that question every time Father reminds me that I’ve ruined my life,” she said, turning to face her grandmother. “I saw Malcolm’s face when Father demanded my answer and for the very first time, I could not bring myself to give him what he wanted. I also saw Belinda’s when she realized that her plan to humiliate me might end in that diamond leaving her finger and finding mine. It would have been easy but at that moment I knew I would be wed to a man I could never trust; one I could never respect. If he truly loved me, Father’s question would never have needed to be asked. Malcolm wouldn’t have needed me to offer him an escape if he’d defended me or at least shared the shame.” Sighing, she returned to sit beside her grandmother. “I don’t wish to wed a boy, Gram. If I ever fall in love again, it will be for a man. A man who cares more for me and for our lives together than for anyone else, no matter the consequences.”
Willamina nodded. “The question is now that your eyes are opened and you know that your poorly portrayed Romeo will be slowly drinkin
g poison that is Belinda throughout the rest of his life, are you going to lie down and die, or are you going to write your own lines for the play that is your life?”
“In other words, perhaps I shall need to grow a set?” Juliette teased, shocked that she could do so.
Her grandmother’s laugh had her smiling as she reached across to pat Juliette’s hand. “Exactly, my dear. The question is, what shall be your opening scene?”
Chapter Four
Willamina and Juliette spent the next several days getting to know one another. Juliette’s avoidance of her father was made far easier by her grandmother’s presence as Horace spent his time either away from the house or secluded in his study. Ignoring her granddaughter’s continued protests, Willamina escorted Juliette and Priscilla to tea one afternoon in a popular eatery in the middle of town.
Seeing hands lift to hide whispers she was quite positive were about her, Juliette turned to her grandmother. “Gram, I told you this was a mistake. Perhaps it would be best if we return home.”
“Nonsense, I’m quite parched and tea is a treat I shall never deny myself.” As they followed the Maître d’ through the room, the younger women watched as Willamina nodded and smiled as if nothing could possibly be wrong. Juliette had to force herself not to bolt when her grandmother stopped beside a table.
“How wonderful to see you, Georgina. I heard about the arrival of your newest grandson, Clarkson, I believe? I am so happy that his early arrival did not seem to cause him any ill effects. You must be thrilled!”
The woman’s head swiveled as she looked between her companions and Willamina. “Um, thank you, Lady Forrester. Yes, we are all grateful and thrilled. Um, would you care to join us?”
“Oh, no, we wouldn’t think of imposing on your visit with your friends. I just wanted to express my congratulations.” Nodding at the Maître d’ who’d stood patiently waiting, they were quickly seated at a nearby table, waiting for the Earl Gray tea to properly steep as they nibbled on chocolate biscuits.
“Gram, I’m glad my presence didn’t keep your friend from inviting you to join them.”
Pouring herself a cup of tea and adding cream, Willamina smiled but didn’t speak until she’d taken her first sip. “I couldn’t care less about sharing my repast with that group. You and Priscilla make much better company.” Eating a small square of a chicken sandwich, she gave them a grin. “Don’t you think it is rather remarkable that a child born two months early weighed in at practically three quarters of a stone?”
Priscilla giggled and Juliette felt her lips twitch as she shook her head. “Healthy stock, I suppose, Gram.”
“More likely a healthy bout or two of premature love making.” Offering her granddaughter a napkin as she choked on her bite of cake, Willamina’s grin grew. “The point is that there are skeletons in armoires in every estate. Some people are simply more creative in their story telling. If they wish to pretend they are better than you, a bit of bone rattling can’t come as a shock.” With her point made, Juliette relaxed and had an enjoyable afternoon.
***
The family was breaking their fast a few days later when Willamina said, “I can’t believe that you’ve never seen my home. I so wish I had insisted on having you come to Blackstone for the summers if not more often.”
“I would have liked that but I’m just so very glad I’m going with you now.” A huff came from behind the newspaper and Juliette braced herself for another salvo. Knowing she couldn’t retreat, she at least tried to soften the barrage. “Father, I’d think you’d be pleased to be rid of me while I decide what to do.”
“What would please me is for you to acknowledge that there is but one thing to do. The quicker you wed, the quicker our lives will no longer be the subject of every discussion at every party.”
Sighing heavily, Juliette shook her head but before she could respond, Mr. Grady walked into the room.
“Pardon me, my lord, but a telegram has come.”
Horace rolled his eyes. “I suppose using the post has become mundane. Who has decided to make their excuses via telegram? Perhaps the King is informing us…”
“You are becoming quite tiresome, Horace,” Willamina said, rolling her own eyes. “I’d think with the amount of news that you digest with every meal, you’d have learned that our monarchy is no longer ruled by a man.”
Ignoring her, he snapped his fingers at the butler. “I’m sure Grady has better things to do than witness your sniping. I’ll have it now if you please.”
“It’s addressed to Lady Forrester, sir.”
“Who on earth would send you a telegram?” Horace asked as the butler offered the tray to Willamina before slipping from the room.
“Perhaps Queen Victoria is inviting us to tea at the palace.” Willamina quipped, slipping the sheet from its envelope. Juliette grew concerned when her grandmother’s face paled and her hand shook a bit as she lowered the sheet to the table.
“Gram? Are you okay? Is it bad news?”
“Yes, I’m afraid it is,” Willamina said, her tone the quietest it had been since her arrival. “I’m afraid you shall not be seeing my home just yet. My brother is very ill and requests that I come before it is too late. I must go to him.”
Juliette was instantly out of her chair and kneeling beside her grandmother’s. Placing a hand on her arm, she said, “I’m so sorry. Of course you must go. How can we help?”
“I shall arrange your passage immediately,” Horace said.
“I’m going to pretend your offer is made with sympathy and not because you welcome the opportunity to rid yourself of me even earlier than planned,” Willamina said, her hand moving to cover Juliette’s. “This doesn’t mean we shall part, my dear. It simply means our destination has changed. Please say that you’ll accompany me.”
“I hardly think…” Horace began.
“Of course I will,” Juliette said instantly. “Anything you need, Gram.”
“Juliette, you will not be going to some backwoods! I’m trying my best to arrange for a marriage…”
“America is hardly some backwoods, Horace. As I recall you were the one who stated you cared not where Juliette goes,” Willamina said. “Pray tell what has changed your mind?”
“In time, another woman will fall into scandal and turn society’s attention elsewhere. Not every man needs a vir… an inexperienced bride. I’ve been considering several men who might be agreeable to arranging…”
“Father, I have no desire to be ‘arranged’,” Juliette said, her cheeks heating. “I’m not some stock to be traded or some investment…”
“The hell you aren’t! I’ve invested in your life since your birth. If you go, you’ll have no hope of procuring a husband.” He turned to his mother-in-law and continued, “Not when you are taking her out of the very country she calls home. What in the world has you thinking she has any hope of landing a man capable of providing for her in some god-forsaken country whose people thumbed their noses at their King and country?”
“Stop being so melodramatic,” Willamina scoffed. “Good Lord, Horace, whatever is in the paper you hide behind? Loyalty to the King became quite unfashionable when America declared her independence almost seventy-five years ago. I assure you that the United States is full of men who have thrown off the bonds of the few who attempt to rule the world with their ridiculous expectations and double standards. This is 1850, not the dark ages. Another little tidbit you might be unaware of is that, believe it or not, women have been known to live quite fulfilling lives without a man.”
“Now who’s being melodramatic?” Horace asked. “I wonder if you’d be so modern thinking if your husband hadn’t left you with enough money to allow you to waltz through life ignoring propriety and making such ridiculous statements. If you…”
Juliette interrupted, not wishing to see her grandmother attacked on her behalf. “Please, let’s not argue. Gram has received some terrible news. Starting over someplace where nobody knows me sounds like a bless
ing. Besides, you’ll not need worry about my presence offending your clients. You can tell them that it was your idea if you wish. If you’ll give me at least a portion of my dowry, I could be in charge of my future…”
“How well has that worked out for you, young lady? No, I will not finance such folly. If you wish to leave, you will do so with no help from me. See how long it takes for you to come home begging me to find anyone willing to give you his name!”
Juliette stood, her hands clenched in her skirts. “I’d rather die than wed someone of your choosing. I won’t spend my life trapped in a loveless marriage.”
“At this rate you won’t ever wed!”
“Father, let’s not do this any longer. I don’t wish to fight with you. If I could rewrite my life, I’d erase the chapter where I fell in love. Not because it came to such a horrid ending but because it has given you more ammunition to attempt to keep me under your thumb. I don’t care if I never wed if it means escaping being controlled by a man who has no heart.” When he began to bluster, she held up her hand. “No, I’m finished. I’ll not spend another moment under your roof. America is just the place for me. I’m not sure where I will go once Gram returns home or what I’ll do, but I won’t allow you to make me feel as if I’m nothing because I’m not. I’m of age and will make my own decisions. Gram needs me and I’m going.”
When he began to yell that he could think of one trade in which she’d excel, she turned and left the room, calling for servants to attend her. In the dining room, Willamina stood. “Does your offer still stand or shall I arrange for our passage?”
“I said I’d do it and I shall!” He stomped from the room as Willamina made her way upstairs.
Juliette directed footmen to bring down her trunks from the luggage room and arranged for maids to help Mabel pack her grandmother’s clothing. Alice was soon pulling dresses and accessories from armoires and drawers, the pile growing on the bed. “How long shall you be gone, milady?” Alice asked as she began to wrap shoes in tissue before slipping them into bags.
