Filthy SEAL

by Amy Brent

  “I feel for your poor mother, but I can’t hate their decision.” He admitted as I nodded. “All of you might stick with the Navy. Mike would be so proud of all of you kids.”

  “I know he would,” I softly replied as I looked down at the floor. He wouldn’t be proud of all of my choices.

  We had made some more small talk before I assured Barry that I would work with Blake some more and left to head to my office. I did intend to do so, but I was wondering if it was best as his therapist. Could there be another way?

  All of my experience dealing with military men meant nothing to me right now. My stomach had never been so tied up in knots over any man like it was Blake and it left me feeling uncertain. It left me feeling scared.

  CHAPTER 9

  Blake

  I was waking up after a bender when I heard the doorbell echoing in my skull. “Hold on,” I rasped as I sat up groggily and looked at the clock. It was three o clock. My schedule was going to shit. I looked down to see that I was in boxers, and stood on unsteady legs to pull on some jeans and a wrinkled shirt before I made my way to the living room. “Give me a minute,” I called out as the chime rang through the house again. I opened the door to see a harried blonde standing on my porch with a couple of duffel bags in her hands and a sneer on her pretty face. “Emma.”

  “He lives,” she smartly said before she pushed her way into the house with a look of disgust on her face. The words hit me hard, and I slumped against the wall. “Jesus, Blake. It looks like hell in here.”

  “I am so sorry that I haven’t been by,” I told her as she glared at me and dropped the bags on the ground.

  “Sorry? That’s it?” She stomped up to me, and I looked down at her expanding belly. “You were brothers. You promised each other that you would always be there for the other one if anything happened. My kids adore you, and they have been asking where you are while they have been asking when he’s…coming home.” A tear slid down her cheek, and she brushed it away hastily. “You promised me that you would help me if he were ever gone and you never stopped by. I feel so alone and…I brought you some things of Roger’s. Memories you have with him. There are so many. I can’t believe that it’s all over.” She looked helplessly at me as I ran a hand through my growing hair.

  “I’ve had a hard time with it, too,” I admitted as she stared at me.

  “I would love to be able to have a hard time with it. I try to be strong for the kids and the baby all of the time, and it just keeps me up at night. I keep hoping you’ll come by and give me a moment of peace now that my family had to go back home, but you never do. You are breaking all of the promises that you ever made to us, and I hate you for it.” Emma told me squarely as she looked into my face. “I had this stuff waiting for you for when you came, and I had to bring it myself while a neighbor watches the kids while they’re finally napping.” Her face was pale, and there were circles under her dull eyes that proved to me what as asshole I had been for avoiding her.

  “Emma, I’m sorry. I’ll come by and take the kids somewhere for you.” I started to tell her as she headed towards the door with tears sliding down her cheeks. “Emma, wait.”

  “I have to get home.” She told me as she pushed her way back through the screen and ran to her car. I watched her as she started the engine and pulled away before I slammed the door closed and walked into the kitchen.

  I had made all those promises. I had every intention of taking care of his family when he died, but something inside had prevented me from seeing his wife’s sad face. I hated the idea of the kids feeling so sad, but I couldn’t face them after what had happened. I looked at the bags on the floor and shook my head as I forced myself to try to find the strength to be the man I promised I would be. I didn’t want anything that reminded me of the past, and I dragged them into the garage and dropped them near the trash can. They could go out with the next pickup because I didn’t want to see his face.

  The doorbell rang again, and I turned my head quickly before running into the house. Emma came back! I opened the door ready to tell her I was willing to do anything that she needed to make up for the fact I had abandoned her, but my mouth dropped open instead. “Blake?” Aspen hesitantly asked as I stared at her in shock.

  “Why are you here?” I asked her as she licked her lips slowly.

  “You don’t want to talk in my office, and I know that you need to let this out. I thought that maybe if I came here, we could talk…I am worried about you.” She told me as I stepped aside to let her in without a thought. Aspen glanced behind me and stepped into my small living room and looked around with distaste at the bottles and cans stacked all over the place.

  “I thought you did therapy in your office,” I told her in a cautious voice as she stared at me for a moment.

  “I do. I just think you need…more.” Her suggestion intrigued me, and I tilted my head as I looked her over. “A friend…a confidante…I don’t know. It doesn’t seem like you have anyone that you are close to. Am I right?”

  “A little. My family is in Colorado, and I haven’t been out there in a while. I work a lot, or at least, I did.” I admitted as she nodded and took another look around the room.

  “I can tell you that this isn’t the way to deal with anything.” Aspen waved her hand around the room. “Drinking adds a week to depression if it is severe enough.”

  “Is that a fact, Dr. Thomas?” I stepped forward and asked as her eyes widened.

  “Yes, if it is real depression.” She replied and smiled weakly. “Here, I am Aspen.”

  “I like that.” We eventually sat down after I cleaned up the room, suddenly driven to doing so with a beautiful woman in my house. I was a little ashamed on top of having the guilt that Emma had brought up today. We got to talking about the area and our bikes, and I watched her glow from the inside. It suited her, and it completely turned me on.

  I got the bright idea to take a quick shower and go for a nice evening ride, which she agreed to. I noticed early on that she had a clingy pair of chartreuse leggings and a longer fitted gray shirt that would work for a ride, and I craved the feeling of her body wrapped around me as I took her to some of my favorite spots.

  I headed into the bedroom with a grin on my face as I closed the door with a reluctant look back towards where I’d left her to strip for my shower. She had seen me naked, mostly, and I didn’t think it would hurt again. I rinsed off quickly and ran some shampoo through my hair before I got out and dried off as I stared at my half-hard cock that could easily become a full erection with the woman that was waiting for me. I dressed in some worn jeans that would work for the ride as well as a fitted blue shirt and leaned down to get my black boots. I noticed that she was already wearing some longer boots, and I assumed that she had ridden her bike here today.

  That was a hot image, and I smiled as I opened the door and headed down the hallway. I saw that the living room was empty, and I frowned as I stepped into my kitchen to see her in front of the sink and loading dishes into the open dishwasher. Well, shit. When I looked around further, I noticed that she had cleaned off my counters as well. “Was I in there that long?” My voice was teasing as she blushed for another reason than my constant innuendos. It was nice.

  “No, not at all. Small kitchen.” She looked at me with a scared gaze in her eyes. “I figured that I’d help you out a tiny bit.”

  “It looks great. I appreciate it, Aspen.” I told her in a grateful voice as she smiled beautifully back at me. “How does that ride sound?”

  “Let’s go.” I led her to my bike in the garage, and she looked at it with admiration in her eyes for a long moment. Aspen had told me that her bike had been handed down from her father, and she had slowly fixed it up with some friends. I had chuckled when she told me how irritated her brothers had been when she got the bike, but it was a shared interest with her father as opposed to all of them.

  I eased onto the motorcycle and memorized the feeling of her body behind mine, pressed against m
e tightly as I felt her long arms wrap around my waist. I pictured her on her bike moaning my name, and I blocked off the memory as I tried to focus on the present.

  We headed out to take a drive out to a lovely part of the country where I enjoyed looking at stars. There was a big weeping willow tree and a pond located in the meadow with all kinds of flowers and grass in the Springtime. Though it didn’t offer all of that right now, I still found it to be a very peaceful place. I had seen a lot of it in the past few weeks.

  Only a bike or a pretty rugged SUV could access the space, and I found that we were alone as I roared up the dirt path. Aspen got off of my bike smiling and coughing a little at the dust I had lifted, but she looked happy. “It’s so peaceful here. I need to get out more.”

  “You don’t?” I asked her as she set the helmet down on the seat and looked around for a long moment.

  “I grew up with a military dad and five brothers. Even though most of them were younger, they were so protective of me, and I am still used to them always being so worried about my safety. Coming out here alone would make their heads explode.” She laughed softly at the end, and I appreciated her family at that moment.

  She was a woman a man should cherish.

  That thought made me realize that something was happening, something that could be considered wrong.

  We walked around and talked some more as the connection between us grew stronger, and my willpower became significantly weaker. Once it was getting dark, we got back on the bike and went to get some dinner at a little pub that I knew that was close by. More to the point, we were far enough out to where we probably would not run into any familiar faces. It was cozy in there, and we chose a booth in the corner with a red candle that was lit in the middle that made Aspen grin. “I love these in restaurants.”

  “They remind me of being younger and eating with my family,” I confessed as she nodded emphatically at me.

  “Exactly.” We ordered some cold beer and burgers with fries before she sat back and looked across the table at me. “I have had a wonderful day with you.”

  “I can say the same.” I took a long sip of my beer and looked at her across the table. “You look so happy and free.”

  “I feel that way.” She stared into my eyes as the attraction between us only grew stronger. “I know that this is a risk on my part, Blake. I know that all too well. I just can’t stay away anymore.”

  “I feel the same way, Aspen.” Her name rolled off of my tongue as she blushed and I memorized it. That look on her face had become one of my favorite things in life. We ate and talked more as the flirting increased between us. It wasn’t as raw as it had been the times before in her office, but the heat was still there. It was all over the room; it was in her eyes and her full lips every time that she looked at me. Even the waitress looked between us as I handed her a few bills for our meal with wide eyes.

  We headed to the bike with an urgency as my hand reached down to clasp hers in the cloak of darkness that we felt hidden in. She reached for me at my Harley, and I met her lips eagerly as the heat exploded and fell to pieces around us. The kisses were long and hungry, but we parted to make our way back to my place after several moments. We both knew that this was not going to stop there, right or wrong. I felt her warmth pressed against me as I drove just a little faster and let the memories of her play through my mind.

  I pulled into the garage and pulled her from the bike into my arms as she jumped at me. Her lips were open for me, and her tongue was eagerly dancing with mine as I cupped her juicy ass tightly. We stumbled into the house, and she wrapped her legs around my waist as I carried her in my arms down the hallway to my bedroom.

  This time with us was not on a bike, and it was not going to be a quickie as that experience had been.

  Once I kicked my door open, I let her slide down my body slowly as every gorgeous curve pressed against my body. I slipped my hands over her as she wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me with a need that matched my own. I didn’t end that contact as I stroked and squeezed, vowing to remember every moan that came out of her mouth. We stripped down in between our deep kisses and eyed each other without any abandon in the light from the lamp on my nightstand. I was grateful to have left it on last night now that she was naked in my room. I pressed her back against the mattress as I asked her to lay back in a hoarse voice. I was hard and throbbing, and I needed to begin worshiping her sexy body now. Aspen took a deep breath and rested back against the pillows as she looked into my eyes steadily. I loved her confidence, and I stroked the skin of her legs as her knees fell apart and offered the most tempting view that I had ever seen.

  She was wet and her clit hard amongst her folds as I dipped my mouth down to her calf. I kissed slowly up her body as she took short breaths and slid her hands over my hair. Her thighs were damp as I sucked on them slowly and she cried out my name.

  I didn’t hold back when I liked her firmly and clutched her body to keep it still. She was sweet and addicting as I tasted her over and over, teasing her to a climax as she moaned and begged me not to stop. Aspen came into my mouth as she loudly screamed like I knew that she would in private and I kept it going with my lips wrapped tightly around her willing nub. I pulled back to see her messy and sweaty in my bed, and I knew that I needed more from her. I leaned back and crawled over her to get to the nightstand where I kept condoms ready and yanked a few out in my haste to be inside of her.

  We joined with my body between her legs and pressed closely to her before I told her to get on her knees for me. She complied eagerly, and I stroked her smooth ass before I found her entrance and drove myself inside of her again.

  Hard and deep, I rocked my cock into her. It felt so tight and slick, and I grunted as her body matched my thrusts move for move. The noise of our bodies slapping together along with her breathy moans made me need her to come, and I plunged deeper as she met me with her body.

  The release was intense for both of us and happened within mere seconds of one another. I watched her drop to the mattress before I discarded the condom and got us some cold water to drink. She was on her back when I returned and broadly as I looked down at her. In between sips of the water and slow kisses, I leaned over to suck her nipples into my mouth and trace my fingers over her body as she watched me carefully with a look of awe on her face.

  “I knew that you would be as good like this…alone where we could really do this.” She told me as I pulled her close and nuzzled her neck with my lips. I was falling for this woman, and I didn’t know how to stop it despite my fears as a Seal and what could happen. I didn’t think there was an end to these feelings, and she slid her legs around me as she sighed happily.

  CHAPTER 10

  Aspen

  I watched him fall asleep in my arms and smiled as I wondered what to do next. I had to use the bathroom, and I slid out from under him to go and use the attached bathroom as I smiled dreamily. Blake was perfect and worth all of the consequences at this moment. I finished and went for another bottle of water from the fridge when I noticed a large spill on his counter. I searched the kitchen for the paper towels that I had used earlier and upon not seeing them, I searched under the sink. It looked to be sticky and should be washed with warm water very soon.

  There weren’t any there, and I looked around the kitchen to see a door that probably led to his garage. I looked down at my bare skin and smiled as I headed towards it and opened it carefully. I had found a light switch before I stepped outside as I remembered that there were no windows on the garage door with relief. I found a fresh pack above the washer and dryer, and when I turned, I noticed two duffel bags that were dropped on the floor a bit more than halfway between me and the garbage can.

  I reminded myself as a therapist that it was wrong to snoop even as I walked forward. I hated myself as I knelt down to see them partially unzipped and reached in to feel what must be picture frames and I couldn’t stop myself from pulling one out. It was Blake and a handsome dark-haired man wi
th their arms wrapped around each other in that manly and not at all weird way. It was the way that two guys act that are very close and the kind of bond that I appreciated as I looked it over. I looked at a few more, some of them with cute younger kids as well as what were clearly Seal pictures. Once I saw the name Roger on one of them, I realized that he was the reason that Blake had been sent to see me. This was his dead friend that he was grieving over.

  What were these bags doing out here? I would think he would want to display them like I did pictures of my father and Terry. I cherished those memories, and these looked like happy ones to me, memories full of love and laughter.

  “What are you doing?” His voice broke into my scrutiny of his past, and I frowned for a second before I turned to face him.

  “I am so sorry, but I saw these and I…I looked inside.” His face hardened as he looked at the bags with cold eyes and then back to me. “Why are these here, Blake? How come they’re not inside of the house displayed proudly? You were obviously close.” I watched as he mentally distanced himself from me

  “I can’t stand the sight of his face, and I don’t want his shit,” Blake told me as I stood and stared at him. I saw the degree of pain in his eyes as I stepped forward and watched him take a deep breath as he looked me over.

  “Why, Blake? There are so many pictures, two bags full.” I pressed him, and he turned and headed into the house. I followed him as I sensed that he might be ready to talk to me and carefully listened after I closed the garage door with the slam of his door. “Blake?”

  He was on the couch with his head in his hands, and I approached him slowly. I knew better as a person not to rush him and even more so as a doctor dealing with emotional military issues. It was a tough job, but I loved it with every step that I took towards him. I knew that I loved him a little bit, enough to scare me.

  I lowered myself onto the couch beside him as he shivered in the light from the kitchen. “Blake, baby…I’m here for you,” I murmured as I rested my hand on his shoulder. “Talk to me.”