Logan's Alpha (Evan's Alphas Book 3)
Page 12
“Who did this?” Merchant’s gaze hardens as he shakes off his trancelike behavior, turning toward the betas that escorted Logan out of his cell. A look of startled dismay steals over his face and Logan turns around to see what has him upset.
They’re alone. The guards must have left while Merchant was busy sniffing him.
“Who hurt you?” Merchant asks Logan this time, sounding murderous and protective. He takes Logan’s face between his hands and looks down into his eyes as he waits for an answer. Logan can barely breathe, much less talk. He feels overwhelmed. Merchant’s aggressive body language, his possessiveness, and the bulge poking Logan in the stomach are speaking to the baser part of Logan’s instincts. They make him want to lie down, show his belly, and submit.
“Officer Wilson. I told you on the phone, remember? He bumped my head into the wall when he arrested me. I’m fine, though. Can we go home?”
Logan doesn’t mean for his voice to sound pleading, but it does. Merchant’s gaze softens, and he pulls Logan in for a firm hug. Logan closes his eyes and breathes in Merchant’s scent. It’s comforting, musky and warm, with an undertone that is uniquely Merchant.
“Sure. We can go home,” Merchant says softly.
He takes Logan’s hand and leads him toward the door and outside. His SUV is parked on the curb, and Logan gets inside. Merchant puts his hand on Logan’s lower back as he climbs into the front passenger seat, his fingers rubbing little circles on Logan’s shirt that send shivers up his spine and make his balls pull up tight.
Logan takes his time climbing into the SUV, only hurrying up when Merchant makes a concerned sound like he thinks something is wrong.
“I’m fine,” he says, smiling over his shoulder as he takes his seat.
Merchant doesn’t answer. He fastens Logan’s seatbelt himself, bumping his face into the crook of Logan’s neck and staying there; his arm slung across Logan’s shoulder and pinning him in place.
“Are you okay?” Logan asks when Merchant doesn’t move away. Merchant makes a deep rumbling sound that doesn’t tell Logan anything.
“You smell good,” Merchant says after a while. Logan turns his head so that his nose is buried in Merchant’s short hair, breathing in the crisp scent of Merchant’s shampoo. Merchant’s hair is deceptively soft and it tickles Logan’s nose.
“You too,” he says, grinning into Merchant’s scalp. He wants them to get going, but he doesn’t mind Merchant’s unabashed show of affection.
“I’m going to knot you,” Merchant declares. He rubs his stubbled face over Logan’s throat, leaning his shoulder on Logan’s chest and pinning him to his seat with even more strength. It’s hard to breathe. “Going to claim you so that everyone knows you’re mine.”
Logan takes a startled breath, heart hammering at Merchant’s declaration. Claiming someone isn’t done lightly. It’s forever. It’s Merchant’s promise to protect and care for Logan until the day he dies, with the implicit understanding that Logan will submit to Merchant as his alpha—that he will obey and trust that Merchant knows what’s best for him.
It’s not something Logan had ever thought he’d say yes to. But now, with Merchant’s scent marking him and him purring like an overgrown cat, he’s never wanted anything more.
He just wishes that Merchant were in his right mind so that he could accept.
“You’re upset that someone took me,” Logan says slowly. He strokes his hand down Merchant’s shoulder. “And I don’t think you should be making decisions like this right now. But if you still want it in the morning, I’m in.”
Merchant snorts, pushing his shoulder into Logan’s chest and rubbing his whole side against Logan’s body. He’s heavy, and Logan is starting to feel a little awkward. Merchant is practically sitting in his lap.
“Not up to you. You’re not the alpha,” Merchant says matter-of-factly. He then opens his mouth and sucks Logan’s skin in between his teeth, biting down hard enough to make him wince.
Logan rolls his eyes at the alpha posturing. He knows Merchant would never claim him without his enthusiastic consent, even when he’s acting on nothing but his base instincts.
“You’re a good guy, Merchant. You wouldn’t claim me unless I said it was okay.” Logan pats Merchant on the arm and sighs in relief when the alpha stops biting him. He’s never been bitten so hard before, and the bruise is going to be impressive.
It’s weird all the things Logan has discovered he likes since he started seeing Merchant.
Merchant pulls back, a troubled look on his face. Before Logan can ask what’s bothering him, the muscular alpha slides out of his lap and steps out of the SUV. He closes the door and goes around to the other side of the vehicle, climbing into the driver’s seat. Merchant’s movements are jerky and agitated, and he slams the door closed with way too much force. When he starts driving, however, there’s nothing careless about the way he handles the car.
Logan waits for Merchant to say something, but no explanation is forthcoming.
“Merchant?” he asks, wondering what’s going on. The silence is uneasy and tense.
Merchant doesn’t reply, but he does reach across the dashboard and squeeze Logan’s thigh. Logan feels comforted until he sees the grimace on Merchant’s face.
Wondering what he said that soured Merchant’s mood so completely, Logan watches the lights and passing traffic, the inside of the SUV like its own little world.
They’re almost at Merchant’s apartment when Merchant speaks.
“I’m not, you know.”
Logan has no idea what he’s talking about.
“What?”
“A good guy.” Merchant glances at him, his expression grim. “I’m not a good person, Logan. I’m not… I’m not the kind of alpha you should be letting into your life.”
Logan frowns. What the fuck is Merchant talking about?
“Why would you say that?” he asks. Merchant takes a moment to think it over, all kinds of expressions stealing over his face. Anger, resignation, sadness—and then back to resignation. He looks at Logan with a self-deprecating smile.
“I’ve never really cared if people thought I was a good person before,” he says. “I’m good at my job, I’m loyal, and I enjoy what I do and I’ve never felt guilty about it. I still don’t. But you… if you knew some of the things I’d done, you wouldn’t want anything to do with me.”
Logan stares at Merchant’s face, trying to figure him out. Merchant stares straight ahead, looking grim and serious, with the set of his mouth hinting at something sad and tragic.
Merchant pulls into the parking garage under his building, and Logan feels relieved. At least Merchant isn’t taking him back to his place. That’s good, right? It means that Merchant isn’t going to push him away. That he intends to keep Logan with him.
“What kinds of things?”
The car comes to a stop, and Logan wants to say it doesn’t matter, whatever it is, but he needs to know before saying something so forgiving. Merchant smiles without humor and looks down at his hand. It’s still gripping Logan’s thigh.
“Do you really want to know?” He sounds rueful.
“I do.”
Logan is lying. He really, really doesn’t want to know. He wants Merchant to say that this is just a weird joke, and that he’s never done anything really bad in his entire life.
“I’m a killer.” Merchant says, looking right into Logan’s eyes. “I’ve threatened, intimidated, and beaten people up, but at the end of the day, my job is to kill people. I’m good at it, and I’ve never once felt guilty afterward.”
Merchant’s voice is almost aggressive, his body tilting toward Logan as he speaks. He’s every inch the alpha stereotype, and Logan is transfixed. He examines the tight lines around Merchant’s eyes and the way he’s clenching his jaw, and he just can’t make himself believe what Merchant is saying.
Besides, Merchant works for Peter Tank. That’s how Logan met him. Merchant isn’t doing anything like what he’s descr
ibing for Chad’s mate. Logan is sure of it.
Logan can only reason that Merchant is talking about his past.
“You mean when you were in the Army?” he asks. He swallows, noisy to his own ears, and waits for Merchant to answer. Merchant looks away again, staring straight ahead at nothing.
It takes almost a minute before his answer comes.
“Yeah, while I was in the Army.” Merchant lets out a long breath and turns back to Logan, looking tired. “I wasn’t someone that you would have liked.”
Logan smiles tentatively. “I like who you are now,” he says. Merchant smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes.
“So you don’t care about my past?”
Logan shakes his head. “I care what you’re like now. I know that you’re a good person; I’ve seen it. That’s all that matters.”
Merchant’s smile warms, finally reaching his eyes. Logan feels the knot of worry in his chest start to unravel.
“So I kind of killed the mood there, huh?” Merchant jokes, laughing a little. Logan snorts.
“A little. Though you were being pretty intense before that…”
“Did it bother you? What I said?” The echo of Merchant’s smile lingers on his face, but he’s back to being serious.
“What do you mean?” Logan blushes. Outside of the heat of passion, he doesn’t know how to talk about these things. He just can’t get around the way his head fills with pressure and his insides squirm. It’s awful and kind of wonderful at the same time.
“When I said that I wanted to claim you.” Merchant holds Logan’s gaze, refusing to look away. There’s a dark note of amusement in his words. Logan gives his head a quick shake.
“It didn’t bother me. It… made me happy. If you meant it.”
Merchant grins, stretching himself so that he’s sitting upright, gaining every bit of height advantage and making himself seem as big as possible in the confines of the SUV. He reaches out and puts an imperious hand on the back of Logan’s neck, like a vise, squeezing him firmly.
“Yeah? You’re going to let me knot you? Bite you? Make you smell like mine?” Merchant’s voice comes out as a rumbling growl, and when Logan looks down his pants are sporting an obscene bulge. Unable to force any words out of his throat, his mouth dry, Logan nods.
Merchant’s grin turns into a self-satisfied smirk. He uses his free hand to grab Logan’s wrist and pull his hand across the dashboard, lowering it down onto his crotch. Logan jumps at the feel of Merchant’s huge cock straining against his jeans. He can feel the contour of Merchant’s cock head under his palm.
“Are you going to be good for me?” Merchant asks. His voice has dropped a full octave, and his pupils are enormous. He drops Logan’s wrist and fists his hand in Logan’s shirt. “Are you going to be my good little beta?”
Logan leaves his hand where it is, curling his fingers so that he’s gripping Merchant’s cock through his pants.
“I’m not little,” he says without thinking.
Merchant’s cock is huge, like he’s another species from Logan entirely. Logan has no idea how he’s able to speak, much less contradict his alpha. Merchant laughs, his whole body rolling with it. He thrusts his hips up with the motion, and Logan finds himself grinding his hand down on Merchant’s cock without intending it.
Merchant’s laugh ends on a moan.
“No. Not little. Just right,” he says, pulling Logan closer so that their mouths crash together. Logan lets Merchant take control of the kiss, opening his mouth as the alpha’s tongue brushes across his lips and over his teeth.
Merchant pulls away, his chest heaving, and he’s looking at Logan like he wants to eat him.
“Come on, let’s go upstairs. I want you in my bed.”
Logan swallows, on board with this plan. Before he can say so, however, Merchant is jumping out of the SUV and running around to Logan’s side of the vehicle. He rips the door open and hauls Logan out, slinging him over his shoulder like a Viking on a raid.
“Ugh,” Logan huffs out, his stomach hitting Merchant’s muscle-packed shoulder with enough force to knock the wind out of him.
Merchant’s arm curls around Logan’s waist, pinning him in place as Merchant runs up the stairs. Logan reaches down and clings to Merchant’s body for dear life, his hands scrambling for purchase on Merchant’s leather jacket.
“Hold still,” Merchant commands, brusque and in control, delivering a sharp smack to Logan’s ass.
Logan moans. If the punishment was meant to do anything but encourage him to keep doing what he was doing, it failed miserably. Who knew that having your ass slapped could feel so good.
“Again,” Logan demands. His cock is hard, and it’s easier to make demands when he doesn’t have to look at Merchant’s rugged face.
Merchant comes to a stop right there in the stairwell on the floor beneath his penthouse.
“What?” his voice is hoarse and disbelieving. A flutter of uncertainty roils through Logan’s body, but he pushes it down.
“Spank me again,” he says. His voice might be a little wobbly, but he doesn’t feel any less brave.
Merchant lifts his hand up and places it on Logan’s ass, cupping it and rubbing his hand in a rough circle. Logan shudders, wanting the sting from before. It had been sharp and delicious, and it had traveled up his spine in a wave of shuddery pleasure.
“Is that something you want, Logan? Something you need? To be punished?” Merchant sounds awed and a little wrecked, and Logan worries that he’s already broken his alpha.
“Is that okay?” he asks, wondering if Merchant is turned off. Wondering if he’s being weird and perverted and ruining Merchant’s image of him.
Smack!
The blow is harder than before, with intent, and Logan has his answer. Merchant starts walking back up the stairs, and on each step he pulls his hand up and smacks it down on Logan’s ass. The empty stairwell fills with the thump of Merchant’s big hand landing on Logan’s rear end and it’s wonderful.
“Oh, fuck!” Logan whines when Merchant delivers two brutal blows in quick succession, grabbing his ass and kneading it in his meaty hand.
“Good boy,” Merchant croons, groping Logan’s ass and his inner thigh. They’ve reached Merchant’s penthouse, and while Merchant fiddles with the lock, Logan just hangs there and enjoys the warmth lingering on his ass.
“This is it,” Merchant says, opening the door and stepping inside. He drops Logan to his feet, steadying him when Logan sways on his feet, pushing him back into the wall so that they’re chest to chest and staring into each other’s eyes.
“It is?” Logan asks, not really sure what Merchant is talking about.
Merchant leans in, crushing Logan against the wall. All Logan can see and hear and smell is alpha. Merchant’s powerful body, his alpha scent, the sound of his breathing—they’re all like hooks sinking into Logan’s very being and making it vibrate with pleasure.
“Yes. You can leave now, or I claim you and you belong to me. Forever. Do you want it?” Merchant doesn’t back away. If Logan wants to leave, to say no to Merchant’s offer, he’s going to have to push the alpha away.
Doing so doesn’t even enter his mind.
“I want you to claim me. I want to be yours.”
Merchant might be riding high on his instincts, and Logan might have a concussion, but nothing has ever felt more right. Merchant is everything he never knew he needed. He’s known him for such a short time, and yet he can’t imagine life without him.
This is his alpha. It feels like fate. Predestined. Fighting it would be like jumping off a cliff and expecting to fly.
Merchant’s whole body shudders, his indrawn breath deep and stuttering, and before Logan can spend any more time thinking about how right this feels, Merchant is on him. The alpha fists his hand in Logan’s hair, yanking his head to the side and exposing his neck, and sinks his teeth into Logan’s tender throat.
It hurts. There’s no other way around it. Merchant�
��s teeth are sharp and vicious, and he’s not holding back. Logan can feel the blood dripping down his neck... can feel Merchant’s teeth inside of him.
It’s the most intimate thing he’s ever felt.
The connection takes hold. Logan can feel it, in the oldest part of his brain, a new presence taking root and demanding to be felt. It’s Merchant, his claim imprinted and sealed, and Logan could no more undo it than he could ungrow his limbs.
“Mine!” Merchant growls, sounding happy and triumphant, licking eagerly on Logan’s neck until the wound has scabbed over and all his blood has been lapped up. The rough drag of Merchant’s tongue over the tender wound is an exquisite torture, and when it stops Logan whines his disappointment.