The Society of Super Secret Heroes

by Phyllis Shalant

  With one hand, Fin patted El’s big golden retriever, Peewee. With the other he yanked off his sneakers. Then the boys slid down the narrow hall in their sweat socks. The dog trotted after them.

  Raj and Kev were already in Elliott’s room. The guys all knew about the missing cape. Finch had called them after his dad dropped him off, even though it was late.

  “It’s going to be okay,” Raj said as Finch settled down by the door. “The cape survived for a thousand years. It can take care of itself till we get it back.”

  “I bet Thorn has it,” Kev announced. “He was smirking when he asked if you had a towel, remember?”

  Finch shrugged deeply. “But my backpack was in the classroom with us all the time. I don’t see how Thorn could have taken the cape out without someone seeing him.”

  Raj extracted a deck of mini-playing cards from his pocket and displayed the jack of spades. “My magician’s book says anything is possible through the art of distraction.” He tossed the card up in the air and caught it. But when he opened his fist, the card had turned into the king of diamonds.

  “Are you sure you brought the cape to Back to School Night?” Kev asked. “Maybe you forgot to pack it.”

  Finch nodded. “I’m sure. It was being kind of a pain.”

  “There’s something I don’t get,” Raj said as he toyed with a mini-card in his hand. “If the cape was being stolen, why wouldn’t it have called you for help?”

  Finch hung his head. “It couldn’t. I got mad because it kept trying to make me apologize to my dad for something I’d said. So I put the speechless spell on it.”

  “But I still don’t see why those guys would even look in your backpack,” Elliott said as he rubbed Peewee’s soft muzzle. “No one but us knew you kept the cape in it, right?”

  Ugg! Finch squeezed his eyes shut as a memory flashed before him. “Bud came to Mimi’s yard sale with his older brother, Ollie. He saw me put the cape in my backpack after it accidentally almost got sold. He might have heard me talking to it.”

  Kev leaped up. “Let’s go over to Bud’s right now. We’ll make him give it back! If he doesn’t have it, we’ll go to Thorn’s.”

  Raj adjusted his glasses on his nose. “We can’t just knock on their doors and demand it without proof that one of them took it. Besides, we might only make things worse. They could decide to throw it away somewhere we’ll never find it.”

  Finch had a vision of Thorn and Bud on a boat in the middle of the ocean. They were about to drop the cape into the water when a copper bottle floated up to the surface.

  “I bet there’s a jinni in there!” Thorn exclaimed. “If we catch it, we can make it give us three wishes.”

  The scorpion and the dung beetle flung the cape overboard so they could reach for the bobbing bottle. But before it hit the water, a gust of wind whipped up. Like a strange green bird, the cape was sent flying toward land.

  “Yes!” Fin murmured.

  Raj shook his shoulder. “Yes, what? Are you okay?”

  Fin blinked. “Yeah. I was just thinking. You were right about the cape being able to take care of itself. But we’re still going to get it back.”

  “How?” Elliott whispered.

  “By doing what the cape would want us to do,” Fin said. He’d never felt more certain or more determined in his life. “We’re going to outsmart Thorn and Bud. We’ve got to.”

  “You got an e-mail,” Mimi said when Fin got home.

  “Who is Anthony Burns? And what did he mean about a party?”

  “You read my e-mail?” Finch pushed past her and ran to the computer room. His sister followed right behind him.

  “So? What kind of secrets could you have?”

  “None of your business!” Finch snapped. As soon as he’d said it, he knew he’d made a mistake.

  Mimi’s eyes gleamed. “Oh yeah?”

  Finch ignored her as he clicked on Anthony Burns’s message.

  From: Anthony Burns ABurns@mailme.com To: Finch Mundy Madbird@mailme.com Date: Sat. 9/24 Subject: Surprise Party

  Dear Finch:

  Thanks for inviting me to the surprise party for Slope. Unfortunately, I’m planning to go camping then. It sounds like he’s going to have an awesome time without me, anyway. Ever since he was a kid, it’s taken him a while to get used to new situations. But if the other kids in class are as cool as you, I know my little bro’ will have a great year.

  Your friend in California,

  Anthony Burns

  P.S. Don’t worry—I can keep a secret.

  Finch closed the e-mail. Since the Thinking Cape had disappeared, he hadn’t thought about the party at all. Suddenly he felt panicky. They hadn’t just invited his class. They’d invited adults—every single one who worked at school. How could he have thought they could give a party for all those grown-ups?

  “What’s wrong?” Mimi asked.

  Finch didn’t answer. He knew what the Cape would say about trusting the “sour she-fruit.” And then there was the Oath. The mission was supposed to be a secret. But he didn’t have the Thinking Cape to help him now. He needed to talk to someone, even if it was his sister.

  “Our teacher, Mr. Burns, is new here and he seemed kind of lonely. So the guys and I invited the kids in our class and all the adults in school to a surprise party for his birthday. I asked his favorite brother, Anthony Burns, to come, too.”

  Mimi rolled out her lip and stared at Finch. It made her look just like their mom. “You did?”

  “Okay, it was a dumb idea.”

  “No, it wasn’t—I think it was really nice,” Mimi said. “I can’t believe you thought of it.”

  “Gee, thanks. Anyway, his brother isn’t coming. But what if everyone else does? I don’t even know how to give a party.”

  “Of course you do. You’ve had one every year of your life. All you really need is cake and something to drink. The guests will know what to do.”

  Finch slapped his forehead. “I forgot about cake.”

  “I’ll make cupcakes for you. Kelly will help me.” Mimi reached out and messed his hair. “We owe you.”

  Finch shook her off. “You’re kidding, right?”

  “Doh—no,” Mimi said, sounding exactly like Finch. “Don’t worry. I’m not going to make it easy for you. You’re going to have to wash the pans and bowls, and clean the counters, and take out the garbage, and sweep the floor. When I bake, I always make a really big mess.”

  “Wow, thanks,” Fin said. But in spite of the smile he showed his sister, he felt a flush of shame inside. When the Thinking Cape had asked to go to the party, he’d turned it down. Now he would give anything for it to be there.

  24

  DROWNED HOPES

  “Ms. Mitchell—did anyone turn in a green thing to the Lost and Found this morning?” Finch called as he hung over the counter in the school office.

  The secretary looked up from her paperwork. “What kind of thing?”

  Finch inspected an old mosquito bite on his arm. “It’s sort of a towel with strings.”

  “And yellow lightning bolts,” Elliott added.

  “Oh, you mean a cape.”

  All four members of the SSSh stared down at their sneakers.

  “I made one of those for my son Michael when he was little. His was blue and red.”

  The word little made Finch squirm.

  Raj wiped at a speck on his glasses. “This one isn’t for playing. It’s a magician’s cape.”

  Ms. Mitchell eyed him over the top of her own glasses. “Well, no one’s brought in anything this morning. But it’s early yet. Check back later.” She looked down at her papers again.

  The guys were almost at the door when Kev tiptoed back and slipped an envelope onto the counter. Inside was an unsigned note that that said:Dear Ms. Mitchell,

  Don’t forget about the surprise party on Friday. Please call Mr. Burns to the cafeteria at 3:30. Thank you!

  Next, the SSSh raced down the hall to their classroom. Mr. B
urns was standing on his right leg with the left one bent so his foot rested against the inside of his thigh. “Hey, dudes, this is the tree pose,” he said as they tumbled in. “Want to join me? We could be a forest together.” He gave them an oversize wink.

  “We thought we’d clean up the classroom,” Finch said.

  Without putting his left leg down, Mr. Burns dipped forward from the waist. As he straightened up, he looked at the guys’ blank faces. “That was a tree bough—get it?”

  Elliott, Raj, and Kev smiled weakly. Fin could only manage a slight nod. He wasn’t in the mood for jokes right now. “We’ll just get started,” he said as he headed for the class ragbag.

  “Hold on.” Mr. Burns stared down his longish nose at the guys. “Did you forget that we cleaned up on Friday for the parents?”

  Raj glanced around. “But it looks messy again.”

  “Yeah—I see a gum wrapper under there.” Kev pointed toward the radiator.

  “What are you guys—neatness fanatics? Well, if you want to, go right ahead.” Mr. Burns changed legs and did a left-sided tree.

  Raj got the broom. Elliott found the dustpan. Kev grabbed the wastebasket. Fin pulled a dust cloth out of the ragbag.

  “Hey! What’s that?” Elliott whispered, pointing under a cabinet.

  Fin’s heart leaped at the sight of a tiny corner of something green. He held his breath as Raj stuck the broom under the cabinet and fished it out.

  It was only a dusty sheet of green construction paper.

  “There’s something behind here,” Kev hissed, peering into the crack between the bookcase and the wall. He squeezed an arm into the narrow space. As his fingers reached the thing, a disgusted look appeared on his face. He drew out a half-eaten sandwich that was so green and hairy it looked like a science experiment.

  Systematically, the guys cleaned under each student’s desk and dusted the top. They also peered inside each one—except for Raj, whose job was to block the teacher’s view as he swept. Elliott and Kev snickered whenever they saw something interesting—a squashed chocolate cupcake, a fist-size wad of chewed-up gum, comic books, a water gun. But Fin only moved on to the next desk without comment. Just as they were searching the last one, their classmates began trickling in. By that time, none of the members of the SSSh were smiling anymore. They hadn’t found any sign of the Thinking Cape.

  “Let’s wait outside the door for Thorn and Bud,” Fin said, although he wasn’t sure what he was going to say or do when they arrived. He wanted to pop Thorn in the nose—on purpose this time. But he didn’t have any proof that Thorn had stolen the cape. It was just a feeling.

  As the room filled up, Finch looked at the clock. Where were Bud and Thorn? If they’d discovered the Thinking Cape could talk, they’d never keep it a secret. Once the news got out, the cape would become so valuable it would have to be locked up. It would hate that!

  “What’s going on over there by the door, dudes?” Mr. Burns called as the late bell started ringing. “Please take your seats now.”

  “I guess they’re not coming,” Elliott said as he and his friends headed toward their desks.

  But a moment later, the scorpion and the dung beetle came hurrying in. Thorn hung his grungy gray backpack on a hook. But Bud carried his beetle-black one to his desk. Before he sat down, he looped one of the straps over the back of his chair.

  Finch and Raj locked eyes.

  “Oh, man, did you see that?” Raj hissed.

  “Yeah—it’s got to be in there!” Finch replied. It took all his self-control to remain in his seat. “Quell, quell the speechless spell! Cape, where are you?” he called silently. He held his breath and waited. “It’s not answering,” he told the guys.

  “Maybe it can’t talk,” Elliott said. “Maybe it’s injured.”

  “We’ve got to get a look in Bud’s backpack,” Raj whispered. He looked around. “But first, we need a distraction.”

  “That’s easy.” Elliott jumped up. “Uh-oh! The water in the goldfish bowl looks awfully low,” he announced loudly. He dashed to the Critter Corner and grabbed the yellow plastic pitcher from the tray of supplies. In a moment, he was on his way out the door. Fin, Raj, and Kev shot one another puzzled looks.

  Ms. Mitchell’s piercing voice suddenly blasted over the loudspeaker. “Good morning. Today is Monday, September 26. Here are the morning announcements.

  “Item one: Back to School Night was a great success. Students, please thank your parents for coming.

  “Item two: If anyone found a green cape with yellow lightning bolts on Friday night, please bring it to the Lost and Found.”

  The classroom began to fill with snorts and giggles. Finch tried to look normal, but he could feel his ears turning red.

  “Item three: Nurse Goldstein asked me to remind all students that health forms are due on . . .”

  The classroom door banged open. “F.E.T.—Fish Emergency Technician coming through,” Elliott shouted. The yellow pitcher was dripping as he hurried across the room. Water sloshed onto the floor as he rushed toward the fishbowl.

  “Oops!” Just as he was passing Thorn’s and Bud’s desks, Elliott began to slip. He jerked back and forth, trying to catch his balance. Water splashed over the top of the pitcher.

  “Watch it—” Bud reached out to push him away. But that only made Elliott more unsteady.

  “Whoa!” he yelped as his right foot slid on a wet spot. The plastic pitcher flew out of his hand. Water spilled everywhere—but most of it landed on the scorpion and the dung beetle.

  “You did that on purpose,” Bud shouted as he tried to wring out his shirt.

  “No, I didn’t. It was an accident.” Elliott was sprawled on the floor. “Look—I’m drenched.”

  “My pants are wet!” Thorn yelled.

  Chloe, Zoe, and Kayla giggled.

  Thorn shot them the rays-of-death glance. “Shut up!”

  Flaaah! Flaaah! Flaaah! Mr. Burns’s lungs were in good shape this morning. “Everyone chill out! Thorn, Bud, and Elliott—go to the nurse’s office. She keeps extra clothes around for accidents.”

  At the word accidents some of the girls began tittering again—until Mr. Burns lifted his bugle. “Will someone go and get the mop from Mr. Paul?” he asked.

  Finch jumped up. “I will.”

  “I’ll get the pail,” Kev volunteered.

  “We’ll need some towels,” Raj said.

  “Thanks, dudes. What would I do without you?”

  While Finch and Kev mopped up the floor, Raj dried the desks with the old gray towel he’d gotten from Mr. Paul. No one noticed as Raj the Remarkable slipped Bud’s backpack off his chair and rolled it up in the towel. It was like after the ambulance leaves the scene of the accident. The interesting part was over.

  Before they returned Mr. Paul’s supplies, the guys stopped in the boys’ room. Raj unwrapped Bud’s backpack from the towel. “Here, Fin.”

  “You look. I can’t.”

  Raj nodded solemnly. “Okay.” His slender brown fingers undid the buckles and slipped inside. One by one he removed:• a library book on sharks

  • a juice box (grape)

  • a half-eaten granola bar (peanut butter)

  • a spelling test (marked with an F)

  • a math test (marked with a D)

  • a crumpled note

  Elliott grabbed it and smoothed it out.

  Buddy,

  Dad wants us to rake the lawn and bag the leaves after school, but I’m too busy. YOU DO IT!

  Ollie

  P.S. If you tell Dad I didn’t help, I’ll kick your butt to the moon.

  Elliott whistled. “No wonder Bud is so mean.”

  “Are you sure there’s nothing else in there?” Finch took the backpack and lifted it up. He turned it over and gave it a few hard shakes. Only a paper clip and a pen fell out.

  Thorn and Bud were in their seats when the guys got back to the classroom. Bud gripped the edge of his desk at the sight of Finch carrying h
is backpack.

  “Here—I dried this off for you,” Fin said as he handed it over.

  “Gimme that!” Bud’s arm shot out and grabbed the pack. The sleeves of his borrowed gray sweatshirt were too long.

  Thorn got halfway out of his chair to lean across his desk. He was wearing wide brown pants like the ones the custodian wore. With his broad chest and spiked yellow hair, Thorn looked like a cross between SpongeBob and Dracula.

  “You and your towelboys think you’re smart, but guess what? Buddy and I’ve got a surprise for you.”

  “What is it?” Fin asked before he could stop himself.

  Thorn’s big, closed-mouth smile made Fin’s heart shrink. “You’ll find out. And I can’t wait to see your ferret face when you do.”

  25

  A SURPRISE FOR THE SURPRISERS

  On Friday morning, Finch and Raj stood in the corridor collecting everyone’s birthday cards. Kev and El took the snack contributions and brought them to the cafeteria. The lunch ladies, Ms. White and Ms. Baker, had agreed to keep all the food in the kitchen until it was time for the party.

  “How come you’re in charge?” Chloe asked as she handed Fin her card.

  “Chloe, this is awesome!” he said as he peered at her creation. She’d drawn a classroom full of puppies smiling at a grown-up teacher dog. The teacher dog was holding a giant bone with a red bow tied around it. Beneath the picture it said, Hope you have a gnaw-some birthday!

  Chloe beamed. “Thank you. I thought of it myself.” She’d already forgotten about her question.

  At lunch, the guys picked at their sandwiches until everyone went out for recess. Then they blew up two packs of balloons and taped them to the columns around the cafeteria. Along the wall opposite the windows they stretched a line of string and hung their classmates’ cards from it with paper clips. One of the cards had a picture of a round-faced character with spiky yellow hair and pointy yellow teeth. Inside, it was signed, From Guess Who?