Could Be the Reason: (Gabe and Sadie) (A Back to Jetty Beach Romance Book 3)
Page 18
The new restaurant has been up and running for months, but sometimes I still look around in awe. The building turned out better than I could have hoped. It’s stunning. Tall ceilings and huge windows make it feel spacious and airy, while the soft lighting enhances the intimacy of the dining room. The décor is elegant, while still retaining a local flavor.
We kept some features of the original building, like the exposed wood beams and a large stone fireplace in the lobby. The kitchen itself is a dream. Being able to design it from scratch meant I could have everything to my exact preferences and specifications. The first night I cooked here felt like coming home. There was no period of adjustment, or figuring out a new routine. It was perfect.
It’s too cold to use the outdoor dining space on the balcony, and the new private dining room is too small, so the baby shower is being held in the main part of the restaurant. Sadie and Emma are setting out the last of the centerpieces—each table gets a vase with a spray of pink, blue, and yellow flowers. Off to the side are two empty tables for gifts, decorated with balloons and a little banner that says, Congratulations! strung between them. The restaurant staff is busy setting out brunch. Violet wiggles her feet again as we pass by the food.
“It smells good, doesn’t it?” I bounce her a little. “Don’t worry, cupcake. Daddy will get you a bite when Mommy isn’t looking.”
“Hey Gabe?” Emma says. “Do you see Hunter anywhere?”
I move to where I can see out into the lobby. Hunter is lying on the floor, bench pressing their two-year old son Sebastian while his big brother Isaac laughs. “He’s out front, messing around with Sebby.”
“Is Isaac with them?”
“Yep. Do you want me to get them for you?”
“No, that’s okay.” She adjusts the flowers in one of the centerpieces. “Just want to make sure my boys are all accounted for.”
The front door opens and Jackson holds the door for his wife, Melissa. He has their younger daughter Leah in his arms—she’s around a year old—and their older daughter Skylar comes in holding Melissa’s hand. Behind them are Ryan and Nicole—Ryan holding Madeline, and Nicole has their brand new baby Amelia in her arms.
I shake hands with Jackson and hug Melissa when they come through to the dining room. “Good to see you. It’s been a while.”
“I still can’t get over how great this place looks,” Melissa says.
“Thanks,” I say.
Jackson shifts Leah to his other arm. “I’ll be in town for the next week or so. We should talk.”
Melissa looks up at him with her eyebrows raised. “Talk about what?”
“Building a resort on the adjacent property,” he says.
“Always looking for the next deal,” she says.
“I see an opportunity,” he says. “I’m still interested, and I know a few others who might be as well.”
“Sounds good,” I say. A resort next door would be huge for the restaurant. Jackson brought it up last time we were all at the Jacobsen’s for dinner, and I’ve been kicking around some ideas since then. I wouldn’t want to run it, but if we found the right people, it could work. It’s good to hear he’s still interested. Having a man like Jackson Bennett as a potential investor could make this possible.
“Mommy?” Skylar tugs on Melissa’s arm. “Is Miss Becca here yet?”
“I don’t see her yet,” Melissa says. “But I see Isaac over there. Do you want to go play?”
Skylar nods.
“Okay, but don’t run,” Melissa says.
“Sky, can I come?” Madeline says. She dive bombs out of Ryan’s arms. Skylar takes her hand and leads her toward a table set up with craft supplies for the kids.
Sadie comes over, smiling at Nicole, and looks down at the baby in her arms. “Look at her. She’s getting so big already.”
“I know, they change so fast,” Nicole says, glancing down at Amelia.
“My turn,” Ryan says, carefully scooping his baby daughter into his arms. “There’s my girl.”
“I better go make sure there aren’t scissors over there,” Nicole says, glancing toward the craft table. “Madeline might try to cut Skylar’s hair again.”
More guests arrive. Friends of Juliet and Becca. Finn’s mom. Lucas’s father. They set their gifts on the table and people start sampling from the buffet.
Cody and Clover come in with their toddler, Chase.
“Gabe, look!” Clover says. She sets Chase on his feet and he wobbles a little. Then he seems to find his balance and takes a few halting steps forward, his curly blond hair bouncing when he abruptly sits. “He just started doing it this morning.”
“He’s starting to walk already?” I ask. Violet kicks her legs again and smiles down at Chase. “Vi, your friend Chase is walking. What do you think about that?”
Violet answers by drooling on my hand.
Finally, the guests of honor arrive. Lucas holds the door open for Becca. She’s wearing a yellow dress with a white sweater, her pregnant belly sticking straight out in front of her. Juliet isn’t far behind, in a blue sweater and dark pants, looking just as pregnant as Becca. Their babies are due within a month of each other, so Sadie decided to throw them a joint baby shower.
More people arrive, and the gifts pile up. The hum of conversation grows as the restaurant fills. The food is a hit, the couples open their presents. I pass Vi to Sadie for a while so she can feed her.
I step back into the doorway of the kitchen and watch. My friends, my family, all here in my restaurant. My two best friends becoming fathers. An ever-increasing bunch of kids, all growing up together. My wife, holding our daughter, a smile on her face.
I can’t imagine anything better.
After a couple of hours, the party winds down and people start heading home. The toddlers of the group are tired. Violet is fast asleep in Sadie’s arms. She’s standing with Juliet and Becca, the three of them talking and laughing softly.
I find Finn and Lucas outside on the balcony, standing by the railing near one of the propane heaters. The beach stretches out below, the waves crashing against the wide expanse of sand.
“How are you two doing?” I ask.
Finn takes a breath. “I don’t know, man. I’m getting a little nervous.”
“Don’t worry,” I say. “As soon as you see that baby, it all comes together. I don’t know how to describe it. When Violet was born, it was like the world stopped turning for a minute. She was so tiny and perfect. I fell in love with her instantly.”
“I will say, you’re a different guy since Sadie,” Finn says. “Even more so since Violet was born.”
“No more grumpy chef,” Lucas says.
I shake my head because I know they’re right. “What about you?” I ask Lucas.
“I’m awesome,” he says, his tone matter-of-fact.
“You’re not even nervous about having a baby, are you?” Finn asks.
Lucas shrugs. “Not really. Becca’s basically the child whisperer. I won’t be able to screw up our kid too much with her as a mom.” He glances inside to where Becca, Juliet, and Sadie are chatting near the window and a smile crosses his face. “Besides, look at her. She’s fucking adorable. She said let’s try for a baby and I was like, you don’t need to ask me twice. What my darling wants, my darling gets.”
“It’s crazy, isn’t it?” Finn asks. “Us three, married, having kids.”
I look at the three women standing in the window. Sadie holds Violet with her head on her shoulder. She sways back and forth while she talks, gently stroking our daughter’s back. Juliet laughs, her smile bright. Becca’s eyebrows lift and her hand darts to her belly. She says something and Juliet and Sadie both reach out to touch where she tells them. Feeling the baby move.
I glance over at Finn and Lucas. They’re watching our wives, looks of wonder on their faces. I know exactly how they feel.
“You guys are going to be fine.” I clap Finn on the back. “Just remember the magic words.”
“What’s that?” Lucas asks.
“I’ll take the baby for a while; you go take a nap.”
“Good advice,” Finn says. “Thanks for this, by the way. Juliet’s really happy.”
“Yeah, thanks,” Lucas says. “I wasn’t so sure about the couples’ baby shower thing, but this was good.”
“No problem,” I say. “We were happy to do it. And it’s good to have this place running smoothly.”
When everyone is gone, including the guests of honor and their piles of gifts, I take my girls home. Violet is fussy after the long day, so I take her after she’s fed and rock her until her eyes get heavy. With great care, I lay her down in her crib, then tiptoe out silently so as not to wake her.
Sadie is in the bedroom, so I head into the kitchen and pour us each a glass of wine. While I’m standing at the counter, she sidles up next to me, wrapping her arms around my waist.
“She asleep?” she asks.
“Yeah,” I say. “I rocked her for a while. I think she was a little overstimulated from the party today.”
“I bet. Thanks for getting her to bed.”
“Of course,” I say. “I don’t get to do it often enough.”
“What are you thinking about?” she asks. “You’ve been quiet today.”
I pause for a moment, considering. “It’s just amazing how much has changed over the last few years. There were so many kids there today, you know? I wonder what it will be like a year or two from now. Emma and Hunter want another baby. I bet Cody and Clover will too.” I take a deep breath and pull her closer. “I was thinking how grateful I am that I have you, and we have Violet. I’m not missing out on this life.”
“I’m grateful too,” she says.
“Maybe we should have made the restaurant bigger,” I say. “If people keep having kids, we aren’t going to be able to fit all of them when someone wants to throw a party.”
She laughs. “True. Especially because…”
“Because what?” I ask, leaning away so I can look at her.
She meets my eyes. “Because we’re going to add one more.”
I lift my eyebrows. “Are you?”
She nods. “I’m pregnant again. We’re going to have another baby.”
I smile and kiss her forehead. “I know.”
“What?” she asks, drawing back. “How did you know? I just found out today.”
“I could just tell. I looked at you a few days ago, and I could see it. I’ve been waiting to see if I was right.” I lean in and put my face in her neck, taking a deep breath. “Plus, you smell different when you’re pregnant.”
She laughs. “Do I? So what do you think, will it be a boy or another little girl?”
“That I don’t know,” I say. “But I’ll be happy either way.”
I draw her against me and rest my cheek against her head. My wife. My Sadie.
My life began when we met. I think in some ways, hers did too. Despite the roads we each had to take to find each other, it was worth it. In me, she found a reason to trust again. In her, I found a reason to care.
In her, I found a reason to love.
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Book Boyfriend: Chapter 1
Sometimes in life we all have moments when we realize we screwed up so badly, there’s no way out.
I’m having one of those moments.
Mia is staring at me, wide-eyed, like I just told her I murdered her mother. I didn’t, for the record. But the book she’s holding falls from her limp hand, and her mouth moves like she’s trying to find something to say. The depth of the trouble I’m in is starting to hit me.
This is going to be bad.
“Are you serious?” she asks. “You aren’t serious. How? No. You can’t be.”
“I am.” Damn it, this is not how I wanted to tell her. “I’m so sorry. I’ve been planning on telling you. I wanted to tell you. It just never seemed like the right time, and when it did seem right, things kept happening.”
She looks at the floor, her head slowly shaking from side to side. I’m panicking, trying to come up with the right thing to say. Is there a right thing to say when you’ve been lying to the woman you’re in love with? If there is, I don’t know what it is.
“Oh my god,” she says, stepping away from me. “Oh my god. I’ve been… and you were… this whole time… and it was… Lexi was you?”
“Yes, Lexi was me.”
“Holy shit.” She puts her hand on her stomach, like she might vomit. “I’ve been telling you things—things about you. And you’ve been using that, haven’t you? You’ve been manipulating me this whole time.”
“No,” I say, putting up a hand. “No, Mia, I swear it wasn’t like that.”
“How can you say that?” she asks. “Oh god, it started in the bookstore. Can I buy you books? I told Lexi I wished a guy would do that, and you used it on me. You picked me up with my own line.”
“No. God, Mia, I didn’t know who you were then. I just thought you were cute and it seemed like a good idea.”
“When did you know?” she asks, finally looking me in the eyes.
I stare at her, suddenly unable to speak. All my logic, all the decisions that seemed perfectly reasonable up until this moment come crashing down around me. The proverbial house of cards.
I really fucked this up.
“Alex, when did you find out who I was?”
“After we had dinner at Lift,” I say, reluctantly. “You messaged Lexi and talked about your date. I knew it had to be me.”
She gapes at me, her mouth dropping open, her eyes widening.
Yep. I’m screwed.
“How could you keep this from me?”
“The only person who knows is my sister,” I say. “I kept it a secret from everybody else.”
“Yeah? Well, you aren’t sleeping with everybody else,” she says.
I wince. “Mia, please. I didn’t mean to lie to you.”
“Of course you meant to,” she says. “Lying doesn’t happen by accident.”
“No, but I wanted to tell you,” I say. “I swear, I was going to.”
She meets my eyes and crosses her arms. “But you didn’t. Why?”
Okay, maybe I should back up and explain why I’m standing in front of the love of my life, trying to make her understand how I’m also a woman named Lexi Logan.
Confused?
Yeah, me too.
It all started a little over a year ago. I know, that’s a big jump, and you want to get to the good stuff. The boy meets girl, they fall in love, have hot monkey sex, are pulled apart by conflict, and come back together for a brilliant happily-ever-after stuff. Believe me, I’m all too familiar with that story.
In fact, I write them for a living.
A year ago, that wasn’t me. Five days a week, I was schlepping off to my job, sitting in a dull gray cubicle, staring at a screen, writing computer code. I had a shitty uncomfortable chair, a boss who needed a throat punch, and a bunch of coworkers who were stuck in just as deep a rut as I was.
But in my spare time, I was writing a science fiction novel. I spent hours doing research, taking notes, drawing sketches. I would work late into the night, plodding away, word after word. The book kept getting longer, but I figured I would deal with that when I started revisions. Or maybe make it a trilogy. I certainly had enough material. More often than not, the sun would be staining the sky with color, and my eyes dry and gritty, before I’d finally fall into bed for a couple hours.
Only to get up and go to my shitty job.
To be fair, the sleep deprivation was probably not helping my attitude toward work.
I’d wanted to be a novelist ever since I
was a kid. I almost majored in English, but my dad, ever a practical man, talked me into getting a computer science degree in case the writing thing didn’t work out. The problem is, that practical degree led to a practical career, which led to the soul-sucking existence I was wallowing in.
I didn’t see a way out. My job sucked. I was divorced, after a very brief and tumultuous marriage. My relationship status was basically I love women but I’m not interested in commitment. All I had was my writing.
But as much as I enjoyed the process, I knew deep down that it was more of a hobby than a career, at least the way I was doing it. Even if the finished product—if I ever finished it—turned out to be the best sci-fi epic ever written, it would take a stroke of luck to get it published and make enough money to quit my job. And considering I’d been working on it for years already, with no end in sight, it didn’t seem like I was going to write my way to a better life.
Until my sister, Kendra, said something that altered the course of my life forever.
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Afterward
Could Be the Reason deals with the very difficult topic of sexual assault.
According to RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network), every 98 seconds an American is sexually assaulted. On average, there are 321,500 victims (age 12 and older) of rape and sexual assault in the United States each year.
If you are the victim of sexual assault, you are not alone. And it is not your fault.
Please reach out for help if you’ve been sexually assaulted. Tell someone you trust. Go to the authorities. Or call the National Sexual Assault Hotline (in the US) at 800-656-HOPE or online at hotline.rainn.org. It’s free, anonymous, and confidential. In the UK, you can visit Victim Support at www.victimsupport.org.uk. There are also numerous other national and local organizations and support systems that can help.
About the Book