Sheisty

by Baker, T. N.

  Then the DJ stopped the music again and said, "Oh yeah ladies, those drinks... Compliments from my man C-God over there at the bar. Ha ha, I see ya big baller. Ya'll ladies thank him for quenching that thirst, a'ight. My man this song's for you player."

  The DJ was giving C props. He threw on Jay-z 's "Big Pimpin'." I was pissed. I couldn't believe this nigga is up in here spending money on these bitches, money that could've been spent on me. I squeezed my ass right through the crowd that had now loosened up a little. All I seen was girls up in his face smiling, and his ass enjoying every moment of it. ' Oh, he's really tryna to play me.' "Excuse me," I said, in a nasty tone.

  "Oh, this my baby right here, ladies say hello," he said to the birds standing around him then turned to me. "You a'ight ma? I got us a bottle of Mo, they ain't got the good stuff." I can't believe this nigga is on some real pimp shit. Talking 'bout ' this my baby, ladies say hello.' Like these shank ass bitches really cared.

  "To answer your question: No, I'm not a'ight, I'm ready to go."

  "Come on ma, I'm just having a little fun. Besides, ain't none of these hoe's drinking what you drinking."

  "Oh, so that makes it a'ight?"

  "Yeah it do, we came together and we leaving together. So drink the champagne and stop tripping." I did what he said, while he continued to flirt and acknowledge my presence at the same time. I was so pissed off. Besides his money, I made him look good, so for him to sit here and play me was fucked up. I could have any nigga I wanted and I chose him. None of these hoes looked better than me. I repeated this in my head over and over again to build my shattered confidence back up. Then I spotted Shana and some girl on the dance floor; that was my cue to break away for a minute.

  "C-God, I'll be back." I got up and walked over to say what's up. Shana was high as hell. She introduced me to her friend Chasity, who from the looks of it seemed to have straight attitude towards me, which I ignored. I didn't have much to say to Shana and neither did she. You would have never guessed that we were, or should I say, use to be best friends. I asked if she was going to Keisha's son's christening, and if so, I'd see her there. I felt kinda of awkward so I used that as my cue to move along.

  Just as I was about to go look for Mr. Don Fuckin' Juan, he found me.

  I noticed Shana's eyes light up from the sight of C-god so I didn't even bother to introduce them to each other. I grabbed his hand and just walked off. On the way back to my house, I let C-God have it. I told him he better not ever try to fuckin' play me like that again. He apologized too easily and promised to make it up to me. When we pulled up in front of my place, he told me he couldn't stay because he had some business to take care of.

  He said he'd see me tomorrow. I planted a wet one on those thick lips of his, said goodnight and went inside my house.

  Maybe I was tripping just a little. Shit, what the fuck is a few six dollar drinks compared to my rent, my car note, and the five or six hundred he keeps in my pocket for me to spend? I thought as I lay in the bed and drifted off into a sound sleep.

  "Epiphany pick up the phone, hello, hello." My mother's voice coming from the answering machine woke me up out of my sleep.

  "Yeah, Ma!" I said, as I picked up and glance at the clock that read 12:00 p.m.

  "Why are you still sleeping? Still hanging out until late night, huh?"

  "Mommy come on, is that what you called me for?" I asked.

  "No, I called because you're my only child and I don't think I need a reason to call you. Even though your grown I still worry about you, you know. I also worry about your choice of men."

  "Huh," I let out a deep sigh hoping she wasn't 'gon take it there, but she did.

  "Listen Epee, your father and I worry about you, whether you like it or not. When we heard that you were running around with that loser, I couldn't believe that my daughter would settle for such trash. He ain't no good and I got a bad feeling about you being with with. Now listen Epee, you know that I love me a thug too, but it will catch up to you. I've been through so much as a young girl dealing with your father, but he always put fam- ily first and he kept us out of harms way at all times. That's why I stayed with him. These lil' niggas out here now-a-days ain't got that sense of family. All they know is shooting up shit and going back and forth to jail. Your father had a plan. He used the nega-tive and turned it to a positive by taking his money, making investments, and turning his shit legit. He didn't run around, killing and making babies all over the place; he took care of home."

  "Mommy, I don't wanna hear it. Daddy hustled in the streets for years; I remember. So what, you tryna tell me he ain't never came across a life or death situation where it was either him or his enemy's life in jeopardy. If so, I don't believe it. Killing comes with the territory."

  "Your father ain't no killer. Don't you ever come out your face to me about him like that; he's always been there for you and me both. He's still paying for your shit every month young lady. You need to recognize when shit is too good, you're an adult now. He doesn't have to take care of you the way he does Miss Thang. So, think about that okay?" She said in a nasty, like she just let me have it, tone.

  After that, I lost it 'cause I felt like whatever they do for me, they owe me. No matter what they ever gave, or give to me, they can't give me back my virginity. I started to scream at her.

  "Look, Daddy's there for you Mommy. Yeah, he might put a check in the mail every month for me, but where was he when I really needed him. He was too busy wining and dining and taking you on trips, while Uncle Ramel was fuc... just forget it. I gotta go! Almost in tears and ready to let the cat out the bag, I slammed the phone down.

  KEISHA

  Tucker wasn't happy about me wanting Epiphany to be our son's Godmother. For the past three months, all he kept saying is "You sure about that 'cause that trick ain't cut out for the job.

  The only person Epiphany thinks about is herself. Look how she played my man out, matter fact look how she played you when you was pregnant."

  "I know Epiphany ain't big on kids, but she's my best friend, and regardless of what you think, that girl was there for me when I didn't have you. What about Malikai's ass? He ain't no fucking angel, but you don't hear me tripping out. So, what is this really about? What got you so salty towards my friend? Is it because she dropped your boy?" I said defending my friend. Tucker just looked at me and didn't say a word.

  The ceremony was beautiful despite how Tucker or Mali might have felt about Epiphany. Everyone handle themselves like adults. Thank God! Malikai brought his new girl or should I say one of them. Shana didn't even show up, and I didn't bother to ask Epiphany about Corey. I'm sure she had her reasons for not bringing him.

  After the baptism we all decided to head out to Manhattan to celebrate over an early dinner. I was surprised, but happy when E agreed to come along. I thought being around Malikai and his friend would've made her uncomfortable, but that was- n't the case. Actually, the way Mali kept watching Epiphany might have made his date feel a little out of place.

  We reached home around eight o'clock. After bathing my lil' man, giving him a warm bottle and finally getting him to sleep, the next thing I did was call Shana to make sure she was okay. I paged her three times before calling her house.

  "Hi Ms. Pat, is Shana there?"

  "No, who's calling?"

  "I'm sorry, Ms. Pat this is Keisha."

  "Oh, hi sweetie how's your little bundle of joy doing?"

  "He's doing good, I just put him to bed."

  "That's good. When you gon' bring him by to see me?" Ms.

  Pat asked.

  "Soon, real soon, can you please tell that girl to call me."

  "I will when I see her."

  "What she don't live there no more?" I asked.

  "Barely, that child stay in them damn streets, and when she here, she got some nigga ringing my telephone all times of the night. I guest he her man or something, I don't know 'cause I ain't never seen him. All I do know is when he call she's out the door l
ike a bat out of hell."

  "Well, what about her night job?" I asked, 'cause Ms. Pat, will tell it all.

  "What job? Shaking her naked tail for them perverts. Shit...

  that ain't no job."

  "Ms. Pat, she's dancing now?"

  "Now? She's been doing that for awhile. She didn't tell you." "No!" I said surprised.

  "Yeah, she's been dancing with some new girlfriend of hers."

  "What girl?"

  "I don't know, but she ain't from round here. I think her name is Cassidy," Ms. Pat answered. "What ya'll ain't friends no more?"

  "Of course we're friends, I've just been tied up with the baby that's all."

  "Well, that's good you ain't out in them street cause ain't nothing out there but trouble. I'm through talking, I done washed my hands with Shana. She just gon' have to find out what's out there the hard way."

  "Okay, Ms. Pat, just tell her I called please."

  "Like I said, when I see her I'll tell her. You take care now, bye."

  Whew, that lady knows she could do some talking! Damn, talking to Shana's mother made me really start to worry about her. I just pray my friend is okay.

  Tucker came out the bathroom smelling so fresh and so clean. He must have been feeling the family thing 'cause he laid his head on my lap and said, "Keish, you know I love you right baby?" I shook my head yes. "We got us a fly lil' man. He looks just like his pops. So, let's just do the damn thing. Be my wife, that's all I want from you. We gon' do it up big too," he said proudly. I was speechless and at the same time trying to hold back my tears.

  "Keish I'm getting tired of this lifestyle I'm living. I got enough money stashed to take us up outta here--anywhere you want to go and to hold us over for a while. So, think about it Keish, I'm serious. I promise you after I make these last couple of moves this hustling shit is a wrap." I couldn't hold back my tears of joy any longer, I've been praying for this moment. I kissed his lips and made love to him like never before. Everything was falling right into place, I thought in silence and before I closed my eyes, I thanked God for answering my prayers. I asked him to look after my two best friends.

  EPIPHANY

  On the bright side of things, I think I might be in love with C-God. This shit is crazy. When we're together, I swear the nigga gives me butterflies. He's definitely the first out of many. I've never had a man that took pleasure in stimulating my body the way he does. I mean, I never had a nigga that just concentrated on satisfying the pussy without just trying to get a nut. You feel me? A couple of nights ago I had a dream that I was having his seed, and woke up happy thinking about the possibilities.

  Now, you know his shit is good if I woke up hoping to become baby momma #6. Yep, six babies and five mommas.

  Now, that's five times the drama for your ass. That's part of the not so bright side of what I'm talking 'bout 'cause when there's a bright side of any relationship there's a dark side that follows and everybody has one.

  Lately, everything's been, "Yo, I gotta go take care of some business, so I can't stay long," or "I might be back, I might not." What type of shit is that? I'll tell you exactly what it is, it's some man shit for your ass. You see before they get you, they gotta have you no matter what it takes. But, once they get you, the thrill is gone and you become just another piece of pussy.

  Last night, I got a call from Bay, this older Jamaican cat still in the game. He hustles weed. We get up every now and then on the low, no public appearances because he looks like a monster.

  A monster with money coming out his ass. Bay would trick off hundreds just to eat my pussy and that's all. I would let him, but it didn't turn me on at all. I mean literally, he really did look scary and on top of that his uncircumcised dick looked like a fucking oversized ant eater.

  On the real though, Bay is the kind of trick that you'd want to keep around, because there are times when all I have to do is call him up, kick some 'I miss you' bullshit for some cash and he'd give it up.

  In his strong Jamaican accent he ran his game. "Baybee girl were ya been? I miss yur sweet stuff. Come, let me see you and take you shopping."

  "Oh, yeah, when would you like to do all of that?" I asked.

  "Tomorrow, baybee," he responded. Of course my answer was yes, 'cause I don't turn down money or shopping. We set up a date to meet around 1:00 p.m. at the Cheese Cake Factory in Long Island. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know I said I don't like being seen with him, but it was either that or meeting up at his house.

  Besides, I already had it planned out, after we grab a bite, he'll give me some cash and I'll tell the nigga that I'm on my period or something 'cause Jamaicans don't run those kind of red light.

  I woke up this morning checking my caller ID. I fell asleep last night waiting on C to call me back after paging and calling his ass around three or four times. There were no calls from him, so I paged him again. That's the bullshit I hate, that inconsider-ate shit that comes with fucking with a drug dealer. You never know what's going on in the streets when a nigga don't call you back. Three things come to mind: I hope he ain't somewhere shot the fuck up, locked up or out fucking some other bitch. Shit, I know it sounds fucked up, but I'd rather his ass be dead or locked up then for him to be out somewhere screwing some other hoe.

  I called Keisha to push back the time, because I was coming to scoop my godson for a couple of hours while she went to enroll in school. Things have been so cool between us and I was surprisingly loving the godmommy thing more and more.

  "Hold on Keisha, somebody's on my other line," I told her. It was C calling with some bullshit excuse about how he was so busy last night, that he forgot to call; and his battery was dead on his cell phone. Yeah, whatever I heard it all before, I said to myself, while he kept going on and on with excuses. "Okay C, let me go cause I'm on my way to Keisha's," I said with an attitude. He don't know he just gave me a reason to go see Bay and not feel guilty about it.

  "Yo, where she live at again?" C-God inquired.

  "What you mean, where she live at again? I never told you before where she lived at in the first place and what's with all the questions lately about my girl and her man? You checking for her or something?" I asked, heatedly.

  "Nah, boo I was just gonna stop by her crib and hit you with some of this dough I was busy getting last night, that's all."

  "Well, when I get home, I'll call you; then you can come over and we can both hit each other off, okay daddy." He likes when I call him daddy.

  "Yeah, a'ight then. See you later, be good... one." I ain't trying to be on no jealous shit, but C's been asking me a lot of fucking questions about Keisha and Tucker. If it ain't Keisha he's interested in, then it must have something to do with her man. Whatever it is, I don't want no parts of it.

  Speaking of Keisha, I clicked back over to her holding on my other line and made sure she was cool with the time change.

  "Girl, don't be late," she yelled as we were hanging up. I took a quick shower, threw my Juicy jeans and matching jacket, some Timberlands and put my hair in a ponytail. I didn't want to look too good for Bay's ass, which is hard to do even when I dress down, but whose complaining?

  I arrived at the restaurant around 1:15, which was cool since I didn't want to seem anxious anyway. The wait is always long at this restaurant, but the food was good. There was no sign of Bay so I decided to give my name to the hostess. She said there was a 20 minute wait. At 1:30, I called Bay's cell phone, but got no answer. I kept calling until some Jamaican woman, who sounded like she was crying, answered his cell. She gave me the third degree before she told me he was dead. She said she found her brother this morning. He was shot in the head, and whoever did this didn't know who they was messing with. Her other brothers were on their way from Kingston, Jamaica and "they were gonna lick up every bomboclod until they find the one who did this."

  "Epiphany, table for two, your table is ready," the hostess announced over the loud speaker. I told Bay's sister I was sorry for her loss and that he was a good friend to m
e and I hope they find the bastards that did it. "Last call for Epiphany table for two," was all I heard as I walked out of the restaurant.

  Damn, I can't believe Bay is dead. I really wanted those Prada shoes and matching bag. I guess C's gonna have to buy them for me now. I felt bad, so I went and bought myself a Louis Vuitton bag and a bottle of Donna Karen's Cashmere mist perfume to make myself feel better. I hope I don't sound too shal-low. I just do what works for me.

  KEISHA

  Epiphany has been such a big help to me with my son. She is my sista for life. Now, as far as Shana goes, I don't know what's up with that girl. After leaving several messages with her mom I still haven't heard from her. All I know is that she's still alive and Ms. Pat said if that should change she'll let me know. In other words, I guess that meant stop calling so much.

  I finally got around to enrolling back in school for my master's. Tucker thinks I should wait until we move, but why put off for later what can be done now. Besides, I'm hoping maybe he'll hold off on moving until I finish. I honestly don't know why we have to move anyway.

  Tucker's been in and out of town like a mad man. I know these are the final moves before his retirement so, as long as he keeps the lines of communication open, I try not to complain.

  Now that I'm back in school, I'll have more to do with my time.

  I'm still planning my wedding. Even though Shana has been M.I.A, I still have faith in her and our friendship. However, I already asked Lea, a good friend of mines that I met in college, to take her place if I should need a Plan B. I had no choice; the bridal shop needs everyone's measurements as soon as possible.

  I also made arrangements for my younger sisters to be in my wedding.

  This is going to be a very special day because not only am I marrying my man, but I haven't seen my sisters in about six years. They were nine and eleven the last time I saw them. I had to bribe my Nana with a couple of dollars for her to agree to it, but what the hell... money makes the world go round.