The crowd goes crazy probably more for the whole band coming on instead of me alone and its honestly how it should be. I am just not a solo guy, solo doesn’t inspire me the way life does.
"So, look, you guys will know this shit the minute I start playing, but I am taking it back almost seven years ago on this stage when Chad finally kissed his girl after playing it for her."
I start the beginning tune to Saving Me by Nickleback and Carrie starts screaming with Cassa as Chad laughs missing the entry for vocals. We all stop as they look at me while I look at him. "What the fuck bud, sing that shit to your girl." I say and start playing again as the crowd explodes. Chad does just that pointing at Carrie who is singing along with the girls the minute he starts.
He pulls her from the side of the stage when he hits the chorus and hugs her, dancing with her as he sings to the crowd. He lets her go but not far. He guides her to Noah who sings the backup in this one. She imitates him on the bass, like a spitting image of him.
It gives me an image of her one night at a bonfire on her first date with Chad as she played beside Noah. I close my eyes and imagine Candey beside her, watching them both sing with understanding in the song.
I know we need to play one more and call it a night.
When the song ends I address the crowd and bring Cassa, Bright and Raleigh on stage. I look at Jen, motioning for her to come too. She may have been our biggest fan even back then. "I’m going to go on record that this is for a good cause so I don’t get my ass kicked later."
Everyone laughs, but the ones I pulled on stage look at me with trepidation.
They’ll live.
"So, I’m ordering a round of shots for everyone up here." I turn and count heads before requesting ten shots. I pull Sevyn our Roadie extraordinaire and Brian our tour manager on stage. "Seeing my dear friend Carrie here dance and imitate her brother, I am taken back to a night forever ago when we all watched her sing and play with her brother. What I recall with a saddened clarity though, was a friend we lost who sat beside them. Watching in awe, understanding how deep that song meant to her two-favorite people."
The recognition of Candey in both Carrie and Noah tells me I am not on the shit list, thank fuck.
"She was a part of us, of all of us up here. She impacted our lives and we miss her daily. She should be here, she really should. This is the final song of the night, so those with glasses raise them high."
We all take our shot glasses and look out over the crowd and see hundreds of beers, cocktails and shots held high. "To Candey and knowing she is with us tonight."
"To Candey!" The whole crowd cheers and we drink it in. The loss and the love that will never truly go away. Jen watches me close, I know she doesn’t think she belongs up here with us, but she does. She belongs with me.
"Hey, you wanna sing with us?" I ask Carrie who has tears in her eyes. She nods as she laughs nervously.
"Chad too, I don’t know how long I will be able to hold it. I’m all emotional and shit."
I nod and grab Noah's acoustic guitar for her. She sits on the elevated stage. Shame is on right beside Noah on the elevated stage he plays on. Chad counts us down and we watch as everyone huddles in close to them both.
I start on cue with Chad and Carrie, overcome by the emotion hitting me so strong when Shame and Noah come in at the same time. Carrie sings along with her husband using Noah's mic, keeping her eyes on him. Noah sees her struggle and joins in, singing along with her and Chad pulls back to let them have at it.
Together, their voices have a soothing kind of beauty that we all feel. The crowd is lit up by cell phones and lighters swaying back and forth as the two people who loved her the most play for her, in honor of her.
Carrie stands to reach the mic better, yet still keeps her eyes trained on Noah who for once doesn’t look tortured.
When the solo comes in, I go at it hard standing to play it as I move to Chad so I can watch the show.
As the last verse comes through and the guitars go quiet… Carrie sings and plays alone. Her cracking voice is a tell to us all that she is crying, but continues on like a true bad ass to the end of the song.
Noah stands handing his guitar to Bright who smiles sweetly at him with total understanding and takes Carrie in his arms. The audience screams in applause to the reaction of the emotion we brought tonight.
He walks her to the front of the stage where we all clap as they bow.
“Hell, of a fuckin night! Let’s party!” I tell the crowd as we exit the stage.
Chapter Four
Jen
Cal walks to me the minute they exit the stage. I had gone to stand in line and get a Diet Coke when he was bombarded with fans congratulating him and asking for selfies. By the time he made it to me I was with my Diet Coke and in no mood for the constant interruption from his fans.
I loved that he was successful doing what he does, but it got frustrating going anywhere in public with him. It never mattered what our conversation was about, he always allowed them to interrupt and he would chit chat with them as long as they wanted.
I loved how he loved them too, but it made any intimate conversation near impossible.
Point in hand as he says hey and tugs my arm, only to then turn to the red head, fire engine red mind you, interrupts. I walk away because this is going to go on all night. If he had anything worth hearing, I would have stayed, but it is always the same.
I make my way back to the table that everyone is sitting at and nod at Drake their head of security who allows me back through the velvet rope. Now, the Aloha house isn’t a fancy night club, not by even my ghetto ass standards, but these Gig boys made it one tonight.
Cal is still at the bar with the redhead so I distract myself with Noah, when I notice nobody is talking about an engagement.
"What happened?" I ask and signal with my eyes toward Bright and the fact she isn’t screaming she's engaged from the rafters. Currently she is sitting with Raleigh and Cassa and unless they are talking designer gowns, I know he didn’t propose.
"They weren’t back when Shame text everyone and planned this celebration." He shrugs and he is seriously so chill about everything.
"I take it Shame didn’t know that you were planning..." I don’t say it because Bright turns to smile at him.
"No, just you and Carrie. It's cool though. Honestly this is such a bad ass honor and the last thing I want is for him to have to share the celebration or for Bright to have to. I'll do it tomorrow."
He shrugs again looking to the velvet rope as Cal walks through and flops down next to Noah. I watch fascinated as they do that guy thing of hand shaking or like low fiving, whatever. His smile is so amazing and I know he is relishing his achievement and I am truly so happy for him.
"That was maybe the best show I have been to Cal. I recorded what I could for Axe, but my phone is shit so it was mainly the best parts."
He smiles at me as the server brings a tray with an array of drinks on it. He helps hand them out when he looks at me. "I got this when the guy told me what froo-froo shots they had for the girls. It’s called a red snapper. Its Crown and cranberry."
I laugh and smother the fear he would hand me a red headed slut like a joke. He was once that cruel, but I know better than to think he would do it now.
"What? No red headed sluts?" Noah asks and elbows me knowing damn well what I was thinking.
So, mature as ever, I flip him off.
Cal gets everyone gathered around for a toast between us.
"I would never have got here without you guys. Chad, thank you for always backing me when I took chances that carried so much risk on stage. You never doubted me. Shame, you have been my boy since before school. You are the best drummer out there and one of the greats in my opinion. I have seen you at your worst with your mom, dad and Cass and never let it touch your stage presence, you always push forward for the greater good. Noah, you are the tie that keeps us strong. You are a bad ass bassist, never desperate for fame
or the spotlight. You play for the joy and the passion. You are the best guy I know. You all gave me the greatest life and I wouldn’t be here without you. It is a gift to call you family and friends. Thank you all of you for being on this journey with Axe and I. On behalf of him too, Thank you! Cheers!"
Everyone takes their shot as the DJ announces a wild night and starts with The Fray which is the guys biggest number one single to date.
"Cass recorded too I think." Cal said when he came back to us. “We can probably make a mash up for the website between the two." He explains when he sits back down with us, continuing the chat from earlier. He is either drunk or nervous because no one continues a convo on small talk.
It’s so awkward. “Lex?” He calls out and nods for Drake to let her through the rope. This chick is everything I once dreamed of being. She was in his spotlight tonight, captivating him with her siren hair.
Tramp.
I knew my attitude wasn’t fair, just as I knew my next move wouldn’t be. This was about preserving that dignity I would die for. I send a quick text before looking to Noah and Cal.
“Hey, it was great seeing you guys rock tonight, but I have plans.”
I say, standing to hug Noah when Cal grabs my wrist, stopping me. “Your leaving?” He asks with a note of irritation.
I see the screen on my smart phone light up and make the conscious choice to look at it in front of him.
CD: Yeah of course. Everything okay Poppet?
“You are fucking kidding me?” Cal says with venom in his voice before dropping my wrist. “Go then.” He says and turns his back to me.
I look at Noah who is watching me with a disappointment I can feel.
“Look, I’m sorry but I can’t sit here and watch him hit on some other red head like I know he will. I wasn’t planning on him knowing it was CD that I text.” I try to explain, but he is silent.
“And CD? Does he know he is a pawn in this little game you two are playing? This is the shit I am talking about Jen. This type of game has no winner!” He says the last part with a finality that tells me I shouldn’t argue.
“Well, thanks for the lecture. Again. And yes, CD knows I just need to get away from here. I have no plans to lead him on or toy with him. I just can’t be here.” I say.
“Bullshit Jen. He wanted you here, he included you. This is the biggest night in his life and you’re about to go fuck off with CD to spite him. This right here is why I say to not put me in the god damned middle!” He yells and everyone in our group is watching us as Bright makes her way to us.
“What’s going on?” She asks, eyeing us both.
“Nothing.” Noah says, but the calm in his voice is a fake one and she knows it.
“I need to go and though its rude of me to leave so early… I just have to.” I tug on Noah’s arm hoping to salvage this friendship that is continuously getting its ass kicked. “Look, I love you and your opinion matters to me, but in this I have a side too. One you know, Noah. I cannot be here. If that upsets you then twist it however you need to so that Cal stays a hero in your fucking eyes!”
I don’t wait for another cold response from him. I don’t need or want one. I just need away from the shitshow I have watched a million times. I know how it ends, and honestly its predictability is why I have stopped watching.
Cal
Fuck her and the dude she runs off too. I refuse to ponder a second longer on her ass tonight. I make my way to Lexington and decide that now is as good a time as any to figure her out.
“Hey, so what did ya think of our set?” I ask and take a seat beside her.
“Amazing. I can tell you have a gift with composing. Even on the covers you did, your talent to mix it up is present.” She says before waving at her group of friends.
“I hate covers. There important though in a position like yours where you are building a fan base. Keep playing songs that fit your sound and you’ll see it’s easier to get in that crowd for promotion. We covered similar bands like our sound back in the day. It’s part of the process.”
I order us both another drink when the server comes back, slipping me her number. “No thanks.” I say, handing it back to her. I don’t even attempt playing coy like I would use it. That’s how stalkers are made.
“Sorry, just in the middle of something complicated and getting another woman’s number would confuse it more.” I try to explain, but give up when she stalks off in a huff. The attitude is a dead giveaway to a fangirl.
Her expectations of nailing a star tonight fizzled out and that shit is on her not me. It was one thing when I was fucking them, using them. They used me so it was fifty/fifty. Now, I’m just off the market whether I like it or not.
“That was kind of harsh.” Lexington says, and honestly, I forgot we were talking.
I motion toward the server that got the brush off. “That, is a fangirl and they are part of the all-encompassing music industry. First comes the music, the fans, the money and then its girls, girls, girls. It will fuck your life up if you let it.” I explain, hoping she doesn’t think I am just a brass guitarist who thinks his dick is made of gold.
“Got it. No girls for me.” She says with a stiff bossy look to her face.
“Fangirls, get it right Lex.” I correct her with humor I hope she picks up on.
She laughs telling me she did. “And, will I one day have a fanboy audience?”
I laugh because she has no idea. “Oh hell, it will be worse for you with the fanboys. You’ll get there with the right help though. I want to come sees your next show.”
“Why?” She asks me and I get her caution. There are more snakes deceiving the musicians in our world than there is a promise of sincerity.
“Because you have that thing that people will devour, but it will never happen if you don’t fix the sound. Your off and I think that if I watch a full set without distraction I could help you.” I don’t know why I want to do this other than the music itself, but I need this project.
“I have a gig at Pinky’s in Tacoma on Friday.” She says and I know she is in. Who knows, maybe I could actually help produce an album or even collaborate on one.
That’s what time off is for.
“Pinky’s on Friday…?”
“At seven.” She clarifies.
I nod and pay for the drinks, tipping the butt hurt waitress a hundred dollars for hurting her pride.
“To Pinky’s at seven on Friday.” I say in way of cheers and ignore the sting that my lack in a life has made me some musical savior.
“To Pinky’s on Friday.” She repeats and slams her shot. “Here is my number if you can’t make it or change your mind. I won’t be a fangirl thing, just let me know so I don’t let my nerves get me at my show.” She takes my phone and puts her number in it.
“I’ll be there and don’t get too anxious. You might not like what I think is missing or what critiques I have. I just know that we would have loved a solid mentor when we just started out. I only want to offer the same because your talent is mind blowing Lexington. You need to learn to hone it and blend it right. After that nothing will touch you.”
She hugs me and what was once a hottie has now become a sweet girl wet behind the ears who could use a friend. I knew, no matter how hot she is that I only wanted one and that without her, there just wasn’t another who could fill her spot.
Chapter Five
Cal
I walk into Pinky's, a small dive bar in Tacoma that I haven’t been in since we were shitty little garage band. Even though recognition requires playing in a shithole like this and earning the cred, she is far too talented to accept this gig. Pinky's is packed and the owner is getting the benefit, not her.
I called ahead and let the Manager know I would be coming to see her act and asked if I could come through the back so that I could watch her fans response and her show uninterrupted.
Currently I watched from the side of the stage, waiting for her to begin. The minute she started the first song, that bea
t sucked me in.
She was doing a cover by Sia called Helium, but the vibe she puts in to it...? She uses this computer to mix the sound and I can feel the direction she wants to go, but its missing something. Bass guitar isn’t enough for what she wants to accomplish. The bass works, but at the very least you need rhythm with it. Take the bass out and the rhythm, add some piano and orchestral drums? This song would be better than the original version.
It's hard to watch because her voice is unlike anything I have ever heard. There’s this raspy pitch that has her sounding like she is in the pro’s. It is her acoustics that need help, once she has her sound, her voice will carry harder, stronger and it will balance out the music.
I knew before I got here that I would want to collaborate on some music, but I wanted her voice since her sound lacks or use her on some duets with Chad. Ideas of maybe even producing where I could utilize my musicality to help her out. Only now, I want to fix her music and play guitar for her songs. She starts and old Cheryl Crow song and she tries, I swear she does and she is close to what she is trying to do… But it just isn’t there.
I see the guitar beside her and decide to help her out when she starts to sing Hurricane by Fluerie. I know, know what it is missing because I know this song, Tayla listened to it often. Fleurie is on the alternative end of indie artists, but Lexington has switched it into that slow hip hop vibe, but again with the bass.
I can’t let her ruin this song or her name anymore. I turn my hat around so the bill covers to top of my face from the crowd, then pull my hood over my head and hope like hell I can blend in.
Fix Me_TAT_A Rocker Romance Page 5
