by Malone, M.
Even though he wanted to be pissed at Silvestre, he ultimately was just pissed at himself. There were so many ways he could have handled the conversation that didn’t include telling her she was difficult to love.
When he looked up, the nurse was just leaving Raina’s room.
“How is she?”
The nurse gave him a sympathetic look. “She’s resting comfortably now. The doctor is on his way. He’s going to explain her treatment to you.”
Nick backed up so she could pass. “Thank you.”
“Nick! What are you doing out here in the hall?” Ridley stood behind him, holding a small cup of coffee and a bag of potato chips.
“We had a fight. I upset her.” He blew out a long breath. “I don’t know what happened. We were talking and then her monitor started going off. The nurse had to come in.”
Ridley didn’t say anything, just handed him the cup of coffee. She disappeared into Raina’s room. When she came back out, she didn’t meet his eyes. “She’s sleeping now.”
Just then a tall, thin man with gray hair approached them. “Mr. Alexander?”
“Yes, that’s me.”
“I’m Dr. Parrish. I was the doctor on call when your wife was brought in.” He paused and then glanced at Ridley.
“Oh, it’s okay. This is my wife’s twin sister.” Nick motioned for him to continue.
“Mr. Alexander, your wife is suffering from hyperemesis gravidarum, also known as HG. Basically her morning sickness has become so severe as to endanger her and the baby. When she was brought in she was severely dehydrated, which explains why she complained of dizziness and a headache before she collapsed.”
Ridley gripped his arm and looked up at the doctor. “Is my sister going to be okay?”
“She’s only seven weeks pregnant, so we’ve caught it early and can take precautions to make sure she doesn’t get this dehydrated again.”
“Do we know why this happened?” Ridley asked. “Raina’s been trying for so long to get pregnant, so I know she was doing everything she could to be healthy. She was taking her vitamins and eating right.”
The doctor nodded. “I wish I could point to one thing as the cause, but unfortunately the medical community doesn’t agree on what causes HG. It’s been thought that low Body Mass Index could be a cause, but it’s likely a combination of factors, including hormone levels and stress.”
He looked down at the clipboard he held. “We’re going to do rehydration therapy for her, so we’ll need to keep her overnight. Then I’ll give her a prescription to take at home. Here’s some information about her condition.”
Nick accepted the papers the doctor held out and thanked him again. When he turned around, he handed the papers to Ridley.
“I need you to do something for me, Ridley.”
She accepted the papers and tucked them under her arm. “Of course. What do you need?”
He tipped his head toward Raina’s room. “I need you to take care of her for me.”
“And where are you going to be?” Ridley asked. Nick finally had to look away from her searing gaze.
“Anywhere but here.”
Ridley’s face fell. “I don’t understand you, Nick. You’ve fought so hard for her. Look how far you two have come. Now you’re just giving up?”
“You didn’t see her face in there. She’s so upset with me right now. Having me around is causing her stress. It’s not in her best interest for me to be here. I think leaving is probably the most unselfish thing I’ve ever done.”
Ridley crossed her arms and glared at him. “What am I supposed to tell her when she wakes up?”
Nick looked down at his shoes. “Tell her that I love her. Tell her that I’m sorry and I never meant to hurt her. I think it’s best if I move out of her house so she doesn’t have to see me when she comes home. That’s her space. She shouldn’t have to be uncomfortable in her own place.”
“I don’t agree with this. Not at all.” Ridley looked behind her as if afraid that Raina would overhear.
“There’s a time for retreat. This is it.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
MATT FLEXED HIS shoulder and breathed through the pain that lanced up his arm. He gritted his teeth and waited for it to pass. It usually stopped if he kept it completely still. But then again, he usually wasn’t carrying around pregnant women.
“Hey, I’m glad you’re still here.”
Nick stood just outside Raina’s hospital room. He looked like a zombie. Matt cursed inwardly. Why had he spent so much time talking to Raina? He should have just picked her up and put her in the car. He could have gotten her here sooner. If she had complications due to this, he would never forgive himself.
“What can I do to help you? Do you need me to pick up clothes so you can stay here with Raina?”
“No. I won’t be coming back here,” Nick said softly, almost like he was talking to himself. They’d been friends a long time and he’d watched his friend grow from a party animal into a husband and soon-to-be-father. It was starting to feel like all his friends were moving on with their lives.
Leaving him behind.
Matt shook his head and refocused on Nick. His friend was dealing with a lot right now and he needed to be there for him, not feel sorry for himself.
“Why wouldn’t you be coming back here? Raina is going to have to stay overnight, right?”
Nick started walking. Matt dropped the magazine he’d been reading and ran to catch up. “Nick, what’s going on?”
“You drove your truck here, right?” Nick turned left at the nurse’s station. Matt nodded to the nurse behind the desk as they passed.
“Yeah. It’s parked out in the visitor’s lot.”
“Good. I need your help moving some stuff.”
“Anything. Just let me know what you want me to do.” Matt hit the button for the elevator when Nick didn’t move.
“I need help moving out of Raina’s house.”
Matt glanced behind them. The hall leading back to the OB wing was empty. “Please tell me you just mean moving some old shit you don’t want anymore.”
Nick shook his head. Matt cut off the question he’d been about to ask. He’d never seen his friend look so dejected. So exhausted. Now probably wasn’t the time to ask him if he was crazy. He looked like he needed a friend to support him right now.
“Whatever you need, Nick. I’ll help you out. You’ve always helped me when I needed it.”
Nick looked up at him, then crossed his arms. “Have I?”
“Of course you have,” Matt answered. “Whenever I need financial advice, you’ve helped me. You’ve been helping me look for a place to live for like six months. I doubt anyone else would have hung in there that long. I’m getting tired of looking and it’s my place.”
Nick looked away. “I did those things because they were easy for me to do. Finances are my business. Real estate is sort of an extension of that. Have I ever helped you when it took true effort on my part? When it inconvenienced me or pushed me out of my comfort zone?”
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“She’s right. I’m selfish. I’ve always done things my way and damn the consequences. I’ve treated the world like it was my playground and I never looked behind to see what collateral damage was left in my wake.”
The elevator arrived and they stepped in. Matt could only be glad it was empty so no one else had to witness this strange conversation.
“Nick, you’re one of the best guys I know. I’m not saying you haven’t ever screwed up, but who hasn’t? She could just be upset because she’s hormonal right now.” Women were unpredictable creatures. He barely understood half the things Mara did and they were twins.
“Either way, I have to do what’s best for Raina and the baby. Having me around is just too stressful for her. She needs to stay calm. It’s not about what I want anymore.”
With that, the elevator doors opened into the lobby of the hospital. Matt led them to his truck and they
pulled out of the lot.
“Let’s just take a suitcase, okay? She’s upset right now but you don’t know how she’ll feel tomorrow. Or tonight for that matter. A fight doesn’t mean your marriage is over.”
At least he hoped it didn’t.
* * * * *
RAINA WOKE UP to a soft beeping sound. She opened her eyes to a blur of color, the room slowly coming into focus. She was in the hospital, that much she knew, but she was temporarily disoriented. The room had been bright before and now it looked like it was nighttime. There was no light shining around the edges of the heavy drapes drawn across the window.
She sat up slightly and looked to her left. The beep beep beep sound turned out to be her heart monitor. There were several numbers displayed along the top of the screen. The angular digital line jumped along with her pulse. According to the machinery, her heart was fine.
Funny it didn’t feel that way.
She hadn’t been asleep that long. At least she didn’t think so. There was a large bouquet of lilies in the corner. They were gorgeous, but not the typical arrangement, so she could only assume they’d come from Ridley. Nick usually got her roses.
Speaking of Nick, she looked around the room. Where was he? Tears sprang to her eyes when she thought about their fight. Of all the things Steven had told her, Nick being in financial trouble was the last thing she’d thought would turn out to be true.
Ridley’s head poked out of the bathroom. “You’re awake!”
She tried to clear her throat to answer but her mouth felt like sandpaper. Ridley rushed to her side and held out a small Styrofoam cup with a straw in it.
“Here, have some water. You’re still dehydrated.”
Raina took several long pulls from the straw. Cool water rushed down her throat and she instantly felt better. “Thank you. That feels so nice.” She looked around again. “I have to talk to Nick.”
When Ridley didn’t answer right away, Raina leaned back against the pillows. “We had a fight earlier. I need to see him.”
“He thought it would be best if he stayed away for a while. The doctor said you need to stay calm. You were really upset before.”
Raina stared at the ceiling, blinking back tears. Just thinking about her conversation with Nick made her feel borderline hysterical all over again.
He’d spent so much time romancing her, convincing her that he loved her. Why? He had to have known that she would still help him even without all that.
He could have just asked her to help his foundation in exchange for fathering her baby. In the beginning she’d been open to just about any type of arrangement except a love match. She’d known all along how they usually ended and she’d wanted no part of it.
She’d wanted to avoid feeling the way she did right now.
“Did he leave?”
Ridley looked at her. It was impossible to miss the pity in her voice when she said “I think he went home.” When she didn’t say anything else, Raina suddenly understood what she wasn’t saying.
“He’s not coming back, is he?”
When her sister shook her head, sadly, Raina turned her face against her pillow and let her tears fall freely.
* * * * *
OVER THE NEXT two weeks, Ridley came over every day to make sure that Raina was eating, taking her medication, and drinking enough water. Sam willingly submitted to her authority and before long he was ignoring everything Raina asked him to do in favor of Ridley’s instructions.
He’d even eaten meals with her, watching her like a hawk to make sure she kept down the bland broth and toast. He’d made the mistake of sitting in Nick’s usual seat one day only to have to move when she’d started crying over her food.
It was unbelievable how empty the house seemed without Nick there. Even his side of the closet was depressing to look at without all his junk and clutter.
The empty space next to all her stuff just made her sad.
In the beginning, Ridley had asked her each day if she wanted to see Nick. Just the thought of him brought tears to her eyes, so eventually Ridley had stopped asking.
It was too exhausting to think about her husband. She wished she could go back to the days before she’d talked to Steven. Or if she had just not asked Nick any more questions that day in the hospital. It was cowardly, but she would rather have lived her whole life in blissful ignorance than have to face the facts that Nick had married her for monetary reasons.
But she’d slowly started to adjust to being alone again. It was easier if she didn’t actively think about Nick and focused on the other things in her life. Which was kind of hard to do when Sam wouldn’t bring her the laptop or her cell phone.
“I just want to check emails,” she complained.
The doctor hadn’t even given her this many restrictions but Ridley had decided that using a computer was “working” and asked Sam to confiscate Raina’s electronics.
The traitor hadn’t even hesitated.
“If you don’t stop complaining, I’m going to tell your sister on you.” Sam didn’t bother to hide his amusement as she glared at him. This was probably going to be really funny one day in the future. In the distant, distant future when she was no longer heartbroken. Like in about a million years.
“This isn’t funny. What am I supposed to do?”
“Rest. Drink all that water,” he said, pointing at the water bottle resting on the table next to her, “and read your magazines. That’s all.”
“You guys aren’t the boss of me,” Raina muttered.
“And if you aren’t good,” Sam continued, “then Ridley has instructed me to call your mother-in-law to come over here and babysit you.”
Julia wouldn’t hesitate to come over, either. She’d called Raina every day to find out if she needed anything and had delicately avoided any mention of Nick. Which was particularly annoying because Raina really wanted to know where he was.
Jackson and Ridley had come over, together and separately, to keep her company. Elliott had called on the phone to ask if she needed anything. Bennett had even dropped by and brought her some movies and TV shows on DVD to watch. They’d been talking at a family dinner one night and discovered they both enjoyed British comedies. She was surprised he’d remembered that.
She’d been surprised all around to be treated so nicely by Nick’s family. Even though she was carrying an Alexander baby, she was still the outsider. She had been expecting them to all take Nick’s side. But no one had even mentioned Nick.
Raina picked up the water bottle and sucked down a few gulps. “I’m being good, see?” She picked up the first magazine on the stack he’d brought her. There was a smiling blue-eyed baby on the cover holding a bright red ball.
“Better. Read a magazine and then take a nap. That’s an order.” He tucked the throw blanket around her and then left her alone.
Later that night, Sam brought her a TV tray. He plopped down on the couch next to her and watched her take a small spoonful of broth.
“I have bad news,” Sam said once her mouth was full. “I’ve been going through your backlog of emails. The network isn’t going to buy any more episodes of the show unless they’re able to get behind-the-scenes footage with you and Nick.”
“I already told them I wouldn’t do that.”
Raina was suddenly really glad that she’d never agreed to allow them to be filmed. Not only would some of the most embarrassing moments of her life have been captured on film, but she’d then have to explain to the network that she was no longer speaking to her husband, so he wasn’t available to shoot any more scenes.
“They’re going to release the six episodes they already bought as a miniseries about the world of modeling. But if you want it to be a reality series with a full season, they need to follow you around.”
“I understand. All the reality shows on now are like that. I can’t understand why they’re so popular. Watching people acting trashy just doesn’t seem that entertaining to me. But clearly someone likes it.” Ra
ina finished as much of the broth as possible and then took tiny bites of the toast until it was all gone. She still felt mildly queasy when she ate, but the medication the doctor had prescribed was helping and she was able to keep it all down.
Sam took her now-empty tray and set it on the coffee table. “Put your feet up,” he ordered. He waited until she obeyed and then retucked her throw blanket around her legs.
“I didn’t bring it up to stress you out. You aren’t supposed to be thinking about work, remember? Your only job is to take care of yourself and relax.”
Raina watched him leave and dropped her head back down on the cushions of the couch. Sam meant well but he didn’t have a clue.
How was she supposed to relax when she kept looking for the face that wasn’t there?
CHAPTER TWENTY
NICK REALLY DIDN’T feel like playing cards. He felt like drinking a fifth of scotch and then spending some quality time viewing the backs of his eyelids. The only thing keeping him from doing that was the knowledge that Raina could have a reversal in her condition at any moment. He’d made sure Ridley had his cell phone number so she could call him right away if anything changed.
Since oblivion wasn’t an option, he knew he needed to spend some time with his brothers. Otherwise they’d end up staging some kind of intervention and drag him out anyway.
“How are things going up in D.C.?” he asked Elliot. Maybe if he asked everyone else lots of questions, he could avoid thinking about the fact that Raina was only a street away.
“Good. We’re growing steadily. Thanks for that tax analysis you did for me, by the way.”
Nick grunted. He’d been more than happy to take on extra work lately. All the work he hadn’t had time for before was a welcome diversion now that he had nowhere to rush to each evening. He was completely caught up and looking for things to do now.
Ridley walked in from the kitchen carrying a tray of cold cuts, cheese, and fruit. Ever since they’d started having poker night at Jackson’s house, the quality of the food had gone up considerably. He thought of Raina and her deformed monster muffins. He’d never thought he could miss bad cooking so much.
