Love Beyond: Walang Hanggang Pagmamahal

by Grant Leishman

  “Won't be long... won’t be long,” Minda sighed aloud. “That’ll be the day when Mama won’t be long, gossiping.” She turned to her four younger brothers and placed a loving and maternal arm around their shoulders. “You heard Mama. Head over to the fence and find your friends, but don’t whatever you do get dirty. You know what Mama gets like if we dirty our Sunday clothes.” She knew she was just talking to the air. Those boys wouldn’t care if they rolled in the mud, as long as they were having fun. She gave them a playful whack across the ear, before adding, “now, scoot, Ate needs to have a rest.”

  Strolling over toward the fence, she was naturally drawn to the large mango tree, which spread its bountiful branches across the courtyard, providing at least some shade from the infernal sun now beating down on them mercilessly. Spotting her best friend Erlinda, sitting against the fence, in the shade of the tree, Minda flopped down on the ground beside her.

  “Hey Erly, thank God that rubbish is over with for another week.” Pulling a small handkerchief from her sleeve, she attempted to mop some of the perspiration dripping down her face, but the tiny square of linen was no match for the moisture rolling unheeded down her cheeks. It was the wrong tool for the job and no match for the dampness. Exasperated, she wrung out her cloth and added, “so, what’s up, Erly?”

  Her friend gazed over at her and fluttered her eyelashes, her lips curled up in a sweet grin. “What’s up Minda? Mmmm… from what I’ve heard, little Arturo is up!” Unable to help herself, Erlinda burst into giggles and turning her head, waved her fan airily in front of her face.

  “Oh no! Not you too Erly? Where did you hear it from?” Minda cried in exasperation.

  Still chuckling softly, Erlinda poked her face out from behind her fan and answered, “oh you know how it is Mind. Someone’s Mama tells someone else’s Mama and suddenly it is all over the town.” Dropping the fan and looking seriously at her friend, she added, “so, is it true then? Do you want Artie? Have you... you know... done anything yet?” She erupted into gales of laughter before hiding her face behind the fan once again. Minda slapped her hard on her shoulder. “Ow!” she squealed, “that hurt”. Glancing up she added, “Oh, oh, Mind… speaking of him, there he is and he’s coming straight this way.”

  Minda looked and sure enough, there was Arturo weaving his way through the crowd of people and making a direct line for the two girls. Taking a deep breath, she gritted out between clenched teeth, “right, this ends here and now”. Jumping to her feet, she planted herself directly in front of the advancing Arturo and stood legs apart, hands balled into fists and resting on her hips.

  “Hi girls, so Minda...” He stopped speaking abruptly, as he saw the expression on Minda’s face and the fire in her eyes. So taken aback was he, by her look, he actually took a step backwards and put his hands up in the air. “Now come on Minda. There’s no need to be like that. You know this isn’t my doing right? It’s all down to our mama’s. You get that, right? Right... Minda?”

  Without answering, she walked forward until her eyes were level with his, just six inches apart and looking him directly in the eye, she said slowly and forcefully, “Now you, you listen to me and you listen properly. There is no way, there is never going to be a way that I will ever marry you. Do... you... understand… me?”

  Arturo could smell the sweetness of Minda’s breath and he couldn’t help but feel the heat coming from the bodice of her dress, where her young breasts were almost brushing his shirt. He felt a tiny bit aroused being so close to such a beautiful girl. If he was honest with himself, he’d had a desire for Minda since they’d both turned twelve. He’d never said anything to her but just worshipped her from afar. When his Mama had made the suggestion of the marriage match, he had been ecstatic and had readily agreed with her. But now, Minda’s words and her expression left no room for doubts. He felt crestfallen. Much as it pained him, much as he wanted to keep her close to him, he retreated another step backward, to create some space between them.

  Cocking his head slightly to one side, he said softly, “it really wouldn’t be that bad would it Minda? To marry me, I mean. I’m not handsome or anything, but I am a nice guy and I promise you I’d make you a loyal and faithful husband.”

  Minda’s anger dissipated as quickly as it had arisen. Actually, she’d always quite liked Arturo and had often wished they could be friends... but just not that way. She could see how hurt he was by her words and her face softened into a smile, her fists unclenching and she reached out gently to place one hand on his arm. “No, Artie, of course, it wouldn’t be that bad. You’re a nice guy, but the fact is I don’t want to marry anyone just yet. I want to go to University and become a teacher.”

  Arturo’s face lit up at her words. “A teacher Mind, wow, you’d be an awesome teacher. I want to go to University too, you know. I want to be an engineer and help us build projects to make our lives better. You know, dams, roads, bridges. I want someday to look back and be able to say, ‘I built that’.” A wistful look came over the young man’s countenance as he added. “I want to help build a nation for Filipinos.” He looked around quickly to make sure no one was listening, before adding, “a nation for Filipinos, not one for those damn Spanish or their stinking Church.”

  She was shocked, not only by his harsh words but also by the way his face twisted in hatred as he spat out the words, “Spanish” and “Church”. She found herself reappraising the young boy she’d always thought of as nothing more than just another rich kid.

  “But Arturo,” she began. “How can you say such a thing, with such anger also? I mean, your Father, well, he’s sort of in cahoots with the Army and the Church, isn’t he? As Mayor, he has to deal with them all the time. Does he know how you feel about these things?

  “Oh God, No!” Arturo blustered. “If he and Mama ever discovered my real feelings, well, they’d probably chuck me out of the house and disown me.” He smiled shyly, “and I wouldn’t be much of a catch for the likes of you, Minda, if that happened”.

  She blushed deeply. Arturo was flirting with her and although she didn’t really want to reciprocate the feelings, she admitted it felt really good to have a young man toying with her emotions. Turning her head and coughing slightly to cover her embarrassment, she quickly changed the subject away from the personal. “Actually, Arturo,” she whispered, “I feel exactly the same as you do about the Spanish and the Church, but really, what can we do? We’re still just kids and they are soldiers and preachers of God.”

  He tossed the unruly locks of hair that had fallen across his eyes and leant in close to her again, his eyes shining brightly and sharply focused. “Actually Minda, there is something we can do, if we’re brave enough.”

  Her hand flew to her mouth in concern as she whispered back, between her fingers, “pray tell Arturo, what do you have in mind?”

  Looking around at the children still gathered around listening intently to their conversation, Arturo grabbed her arm gently, saying, “come with me, away from these ears and I’ll tell you about it.” She was shocked. Going anywhere, at her age, away from chaperones, with a boy, was considered an absolute no-no. In fact, it could be seen by many to be an outright declaration of her feelings for the boy and that definitely wasn’t something she wanted to get into.

  “No, Arturo. Whatever it is you wish to tell me, you should tell me here.” He grimaced and looked around again to make sure no adults were nearby.

  “Okay Minda, I understand, but I will need to whisper it to you, so none of the other children hear. It could be dangerous for them.” Saying so, he moved in and placed an arm around her waist, pulling her tightly toward him and leaning down slightly he bent his head so his mouth was just inches from her ear. She waited breathlessly for him to begin, but to be honest, his closeness, his warm, peppery breath on her face, and that male smell of cologne mixed with sweat was sending her heart fluttering. The heat rose up her body, from her groin and pulsed outward in waves of suffocating warmth, before exploding fro
m her forehead as beads of perspiration. Using the towel to mop her face, she took several deep breaths to calm her libido and waited for him to begin.

  “Okay,” he started, “you know my Kuya (elder brother), Carlos, right?” She nodded, still holding her breath and trying to still her beating heart. “So, he’s joined a secret society that is plotting a revolution against the Spanish and the Friars. They are going to take our country back for the Filipino people and...” He paused to take a deep breath before adding excitedly, “... and, I’m going to join them. I’m going to fight alongside them.”

  Her heart was beating at twice its normal speed at this revelation and despite herself, she couldn’t stop exclaiming loudly, “A Secret Society”. Children’s heads, all around them snapped sideways to look at the whispering pair. She felt Arturo’s hand clamp down hard on her mouth and he pulled her even tighter into his embrace.

  “Minda!” he grimaced through clenched teeth, “keep your voice down, we don’t know who might be listening.” The warning seemed to register with her and her eyes opened wide, but she nodded her head in assent as Arturo slowly released his hand from over her mouth, but he didn’t loosen his grip on her and continued to hold her tightly to him. She decided she quite liked that and felt comfortable and safe in his arms.

  “A secret society, really?” she mused, very softly this time. “So, what does this ‘secret society’ call itself, then?”

  Arturo shuffled nervously, “well, Carlos swore me to absolute secrecy, so I really can’t tell you their name. If anyone finds out about it, they will be hunted down by the Spanish, like animals. I’m sorry Minda.”

  Infuriated now, she grabbed him by the front of his shirt, twisted it in her fist and ground out, between clenched teeth. “Arturo de la Cruz, you will tell me or, so help me, I will bust that nose of yours.”

  He gulped noisily. Much as he liked Minda, he was just a little bit scared of her as well. He’d heard stories about her famed temper and he had no desire to check on their validity there and then. “Alright Mind, I’ll tell you, but you must, ‘cross your heart and hope to die’, promise me, you won’t divulge it to anyone... and I really do mean anyone, Minda.”

  A sly smile crept over her face and she released his shirt front from her steel-like grip, smoothing the wrinkles out as she did so. “Of course, Artie, of course.”

  “So do it then,” he insisted.

  She sighed in frustration and crossed her heart, before pointing to the sky and then running her finger across the underside of her neck. “Cross my heart and hope to die,” she swore.

  Leaning in close again, so he was touching her ear with his lips, he mouthed, “they call themselves the KKK.”

  Her face creased in thought and she turned her head until their lips were almost touching. “The KKK. What a strange name. What does the KKK stand for?”

  “It means...”

  “Minda! Minda! Minda! Mama and Papa are looking for you. It’s time to go home.” It was Louis, the youngest. “Come on Minda! Now! Papa is angry and if you keep him waiting you know what will happen when we get home. We’ll all get the belt, not just you,” he wheedled.

  “Okay Louis, I’m just coming,” she replied. Turning to Arturo she again asked him softly, “what does the KKK stand for?”

  “Well, its full name is ‘Katastaasang Kagalanggalangang Katipunan ng mga Anak ng Bayan’ (Supreme and Most Honourable Society of the Children of the Nation) but we just call it the KKK or the Katipunan for short.

  Minda was intrigued. Finally, someone was going to try and stand up to the bullies and force them from their homeland. She recalled some of the writings of Rizal and others and could feel her heart telling her this was something she needed to be involved in, this was her destiny. “I want to join,” she blurted out to Arturo.

  He drew himself up to his full height and thrust his chest out arrogantly. “No women allowed, Minda. It’s in their rules.” His display of macho and bravado annoyed her intensely and she felt her anger rise, like bile.

  “In their rules is it! In their rules!” she spat at the stunned Arturo. “Well, we’ll just have to change their bloody rules then, won’t we?” She stamped her foot on the ground. “You mark my words Arturo de la Cruz, I am joining the KKK and no man, or boy, is going to stop me.”

  “Minda... Minda... come on, please,” Louis screeched. “Mama and Papa, please Ate, they’re waiting.” Looking down at the pleading face of her brother her heart melted and her anger flowed away.

  “Okay Louis, let’s go and see what they’re up to.” She bent down and picked her brother up, slinging him under an arm and strode off toward the now thinning crowds in the church forecourt. Turning, as they left, she fired one last, parting shot at the still shell-shocked Arturo. “We will talk about this again Arturo, very soon.”

  When they joined the rest of the family, she could see Papa was very upset. His face was red and he was tapping his foot impatiently on the dusty ground. Before he could say anything, her mother jumped in, “Luzviminda, where do you think you’ve been hiding? We’ve been waiting for ages for you.”

  Putting on her most coquettish smile and little-girl look, she fluttered her eyelashes and airily waved her fan in front of her face. “Oh Mama, I’ve been talking to Arturo. He’s such a very nice boy, you know.” A broad smile lit across her mother’s face and she nodded vigorously.

  “Arturo you say. Well, that’s excellent. It’s time you two got better acquainted.” Suddenly something occurred to her and she fixed Minda with a withering stare. “I hope you two had a chaperone. You would be the talk of the town if it was known you were spending time with Arturo, without a chaperone.”

  “Oh Mama, don’t be silly. Of course, we had numerous chaperones. All the children were there with us.”

  Her mother breathed a deep sigh of relief before adding, “well, that’s fine then. Now come along children we need to get home and prepare the lunchtime meal. We’ve dallied here long enough.”

  The family turned and headed for the gate and the hot, weary walk home in the morning sun. Minda hung back slightly from the rest of the family, walking alone, a few feet behind them, her mind whirling with the possibilities of what Arturo had divulged to her. She was angry. She knew full well that prior to the arrival of the Spanish, women were venerated in early Filipino society. Not only were there tales of great women warriors, there were many stories of warrior Queens and Princesses, down through antiquity. What had changed over the last three hundred odd years, she wondered? It’s down to those damn Spanish, she concluded. They treat their women like they are delicate flowers who can’t even handle hard work, let alone think for themselves, and that had filtered down into the local society. Women were expected to stay at home, get married, have babies, cook and sew for their menfolk. “Well, not this woman,” she said softly. “This woman is going to be a fighter. This woman is going to be part of the revolution, even if it kills me.”

  So wrapped up in her reverie, was she, she didn’t even hear the approaching hoof-beats of many horses. Her Father did, however, and he rallied his family around him. “Children, the Spanish Army is coming. We must keep far to the left of the road or we will get crushed under their horses’ hooves.” He grabbed the other children and signalled to Minda that they should all line up in single file, ready to bow, curtsey or doff their hat to the passing military.

  When the cantering horses rounded the bend on the road and were almost upon them, it was clear there was not enough room even for them to be passed safely, standing in single file, at the side of the road. The long, legs of the horses were pumping up and down, the sun glinting off the metal of their horseshoes as they bore down irresistibly on the waiting, hapless family. “Jump!” Minda’s father screamed as the first hooves came scything toward them threatening to take their very heads off. “Jump! Now!” he screamed again, in panic.

  The family, dressed in their Sunday finery, as one, dived for the safety of the neighbouring rice fields,
landing in the water and mud, with a resounding splash and squelch. Minda, her mind still a million miles away, was the slowest and the last to dive for the sanctuary of the paddock. As she went to jump, her head connected with the solid toe of the boot worn by the lead horseman and her world turned black.

  ***

  HERNANDO:

  Hernando’s patrol made a striking picture as they marched out from the garrison and he led them into the town of Santa Maria. From the saddle of his trusty steed Geraldo, he gazed around at his troop. Yes, they need some discipline drummed into them and we need to work on their ‘spit and polish’ but all in all, there’s not much that can compete with the spectacle of a fully-armoured, properly kitted out, Cavalry Unit of the Spanish Army. He allowed himself to feel the pride of leading his men in a foreign country. We are doing a service to these people, he kept reminding himself.

  As they entered the main street of Santa Maria, he was immediately struck by the silence of the place. Sure, it was a Sunday morning, but from what he’d seen in Manila, he expected the streets to be buzzing with people, vendors setting up stalls and selling their produce, children running around playing between the adult’s feet, but there was nothing. Stray, hungry dogs, their ribs clearly visible through their dirty, matted coats roamed the dusty sidewalks, poking their noses into alleyways, looking for a tasty morsel to fill their aching bellies. Hernando turned to his left, to his First Sergeant Molinero. “Where the hell is everyone?” he enquired.

  Molinero shrugged his shoulders at his Captain. “Beats me, Sir! I’m as new here as you are.”