Shiver

by Nancy Lee Badger

  Sadly, a little girl’s dreams faded away. With no money for college, and little emotional support from her mother, her academic plans washed away during high school.

  Odd jobs here and there kept her busy. She waited tables, cleaned houses, and bagged groceries.

  Helping others breeds contentment, and doing a good job is a pleasure.

  She shared her dreams with Josie. “I assumed I’d fall in love and move away from here.”

  “Things change. Count on that,” Josie had replied.

  Things hadn’t changed, except she’d lost her heart to a man who didn’t want it. She recalled earlier in the afternoon when she’d set the cream pitcher down and started back toward the kitchen. She had paused to wipe down the counter in front of the soda fountain, when Jacob came into view.

  Her breath caught in her throat. A slow burn spread across her chest, which surprised her. She’d worked hard to sweep those emotions away.

  He stood straight and tall, with his legs slightly apart, proving his police training. He wore a dusky brown tweed jacket over a deep brown turtleneck, which complemented his eyes.

  Stop it!

  She had better things to do than watch a man waiting for his lunch. No matter that he looked tall and strong with both his thumbs resting in his front jeans pockets. She had licked her lips, and when an urge to bite something came to mind, she glanced elsewhere. As if magnetized, her head had swung back to Jacob. His weathered face sported small lines at the corners of those deep brown eyes.

  He’s aged, but he’s no longer using a cane.

  She trembled, wondering if he missed her. No, he’d never be interested in a long-term relationship with a poor young working woman. He probably wanted to escape the moment he entered her tiny cabin.

  A passing female student had given him a flirtatious look, but he’d ignored her. Destiny could not. At the time, she’d hoped he’d go eat in the teacher’s lounge so these younger girls wouldn’t tempt him.

  Wake up, you little idiot. What’s done is done.

  ***

  Now she stood in an empty parking lot, cursing another lost opportunity to confront the man who haunted her dreams. Was this episode—this relationship—really over?

  “This is pitiful. We had the briefest love affair on record.”

  A gust of wind teased her breasts through the thin fabric of her shirt. She clutched her sweater tightly closed, then groaned when her nipples hardened and pressed against her cotton bra. The gray cloud moved on. So should she, but a clear blue sky held no answers. The weather grew too cold for a hike, yet teased her need to release pent-up energy.

  Think of something else. Something cool and dreary.

  Winter loomed. She wasn’t quite ready. Her woodpile was adequately full and her pantry stocked with canned goods, but how could she face cold winter nights alone? She foresaw a future filled with sleepless nights, as she huddled around her potbellied stove.

  Without the only man who made her body come alive.

  She’d drift off into the same fitful dreams that had kept her awake these past weeks. She missed Jacob and doubted she’d get over their short-lived affair any time soon.

  With a wistful glance around the parking lot, she slipped back inside her van and parked it in the student lot. As she locked her door, Marcus walked by with a pretty girl. Wasn’t she the one who asked her a question about the dining hall’s cottage cheese? She wore a similar short skirt and had the familiar white-blonde hair. She was all of one hundred pounds, and Destiny couldn’t understand the girls’ need to watch calories.

  Are those two dating?

  Marcus Benton had turned Destiny’s stomach the first time he’d spoken to her. Even a benign conversation, while she worked at the dining hall, gave her chills. At first, he’d acted polite, had given her goofy smiles, and complimented her on her hair. Just a week later, he’d become crude, and his attitude had changed. Sweet nothings about the weather turned into wolfish comments about her physical attributes.

  Marcus showed up in unusual places, as well. She’d walked around a corner in the drugstore one evening to find him picking out packs of condoms, an action he made no move to hide. In fact, he seemed pleased she’d caught him buying them.

  The next morning, she’d walked from this very parking lot toward the dining hall when he’d literally fallen from a tree. She’d slapped a hand across her chest and told him he’d given her quite a start. His cold, gray eyes scorched her, as his hot gaze flickered up and down her body. When he whispered that wasn’t all he wanted to give her, she’d walked away as fast as her legs could carry her.

  She hoped this new girl kept the guy off her back. She cringed each time he strolled into the dining hall. Hiding had become increasingly difficult, but not as difficult as her meetings with Pete Thayer. He happened by last Sunday afternoon while she browsed in the bookstore. He’d sauntered close, as if wanting to catch her selection’s title. Less than an hour later, while she shopped for food at the local market, he stared at her purchases. His attention bordered on eerie and disturbing, and became one of the reasons Destiny didn’t visit her friend Josie at the firehouse. Pete was Josie’s partner on the ambulance squad of the Fairfield Fire department.

  He was good-looking with sandy-blond hair and a trim athletic body, and Destiny suspected Josie harbored feelings for him. Destiny would never come between Josie and a man she cared for. Hell, she appreciated a man’s body as well as the next woman, but Pete Thayer’s smile made her nervous.

  Like the man’s sizing me up for a meal.

  To keep away from Pete, she avoided visits to Josie at the firehouse. Neither reaction brought a solution to their intense vigilance. Both men had the right to talk to her. Didn’t she have the right to ignore them? Destiny prayed both soon tired of her attitude.

  Thinking back on Marcus, perhaps he’d found someone else to occupy his time. She watched them walk away together. Maybe his new interest meant she’d been set free.

  Free and alone.

  “This all comes back to Jacob Oliver. I miss the jerk.”

  Destiny hurried toward the dining hall. She couldn’t be late. No need to give Tilly any reason to yell. Her boss still seemed mad at her for not falling for the professor after she’d confessed about knowing the man.

  Too bad Tilly had no idea just how far she’d fallen.

  ***

  Early the next morning, Destiny headed toward the fire station. Josie had invited her for breakfast, and she decided to grow up, and go. If she saw Pete, she’d ignore him. The sidewalks were empty and the air was cool, but not as frigid as last night. She parked by the market and then clomped along in her favorite hiking boots, warm inside her blue sweatshirt and rugged jeans. The yeasty aroma of fresh baked bread mingled with vehicle exhaust. Her mind was engaged elsewhere when she started to cross Main Street.

  A shout jerked her to the present, and then two large hands grabbed her around the waist, spun her, and she landed with a thud against a brick storefront. A milk tanker truck barreled down the empty street. The whoosh of air brakes and the truck’s horn added to her momentary disorientation. The passing vehicle’s bulk blew hot air into her face. Blinded, she tried to jerk free of her savior, but he held tight.

  “Are you trying to kill yourself? Let me know now, so I don’t risk my life again,” a gruff masculine voice said, then dragged her into the alley.

  “Jacob? Let go.”

  “Are you for real? Didn’t you see the truck?”

  She shook her head, then realized his gaze followed the rise and fall of her chest. Before he could move or say another word, she leaned in and kissed him. So he couldn’t pull back, she curled both arms around his neck. So he couldn’t retreat, she wove her fingers through his wavy hair, and held tight.

  Her tongue entered his warm mouth, and he groaned. He tasted of coffee and smelled like cinnamon toast. She pressed her body against his. When he pushed the length of his body against hers, pressing her against the wall,
she felt the solid bulge of his arousal. He still desired her.

  “Destiny,” he said, pulling free, “we mustn’t do this. I’m sorry.”

  “Why shouldn’t we be together?”

  He didn’t answer. Instead, he pushed back from the wall, turned, and walked away.

  ***

  “I can’t believe my luck!” Marcus whispered. Cindy Nelson sat next to him on the way home from their Boston trip. His plan progressed. He only had to coax her along.

  “I enjoyed our time in the museum, Cindy. I ain’t never been so moved by paintings before, but a couple of them were pretty darn good,” he drawled, doing his best to impress her.

  Cindy smiled. “I’ll have to sit down and think, so I can choose two paintings for the assignment. Did you find any to write about?”

  He’d watched her as she jotted notes on several of the museum’s artwork, so he took a shot in order to trick her into a date. The urge to get in her pants intensified the longer they sat together in the cramped space. His usual flirtatious methods wouldn’t work on someone as fine as Cindy.

  For a different approach, he first had to put her at ease. Then he had to get her alone. To keep his thoughts away from the image of her luscious body moaning under him, he got back to the subject at hand.

  “Well, I was kinda’ interested in Reading by the Shore, by Pearce. It spoke to me.” It was bullshit, but it worked—her face brightened.

  “But the one that really gave me goose bumps was Madame X, by John Singer Sergeant. His painting of a woman in a vintage black gown in historical Paris gave me a warm feeling down in my belly. It was almost sexual,” Marcus blushed, pretending embarrassment.

  “I know what you mean,” Cindy said, “because the old masters had the expertise to put oil on canvas in such a way one can only stop and stare.”

  While her breasts heaved, Marcus manipulated his arm around her shoulder. Pulling her close in the semi-darkness of the school van, he drank in her sweet scent.

  “I understand,” he whispered. “And I’m thrilled to find someone who thinks like me. Let me buy you dinner tonight. We can plan what pieces to include in our report. Since we seem to like several of the same ones, it would be silly to be come off as copy-cats.”

  “True,” she replied. “The Professor said he wanted variety.”

  “I can help you, and you can help me, and we can get this done fast. Whaddya say?” His large fingers rubbed her shoulder. She stiffened and pulled inches away, her hesitation palpable.

  “Do you appreciate art? You don’t seem the type. I’m curious,” she smiled, “you’re an athlete, I’ve been told.”

  He sensed her wavering. “Listen, Cindy, if you get this report out of the way, you can take the long weekend and put it to better use. Didn’t you say you had no more classes until Monday?” Lord knew he had several ideas about how to put that time to good use, which included her and a bed.

  “Good idea. I’d like to finish this report by tomorrow. Where can we get some dinner?”

  In the van’s shadowy interior, she didn’t see the sneer pull at the corner of his mouth, nor how his eyelids lowered in anticipation.

  Gotcha. You’re gonna love tonight.

  “I thought we’d check out the Village Diner. I hear they serve home-cooked meals, and I’ve always wanted to try them,” he coaxed. He had to get her to an out-of-town restaurant. He needed privacy for his seduction.

  “Isn’t the Village Diner a bit out of the way, Marcus? I don’t want you to waste gas.”

  “Don’t worry. I’m loaded. Besides playing football, I have a trust fund from my late grandfather that pays for everything else. Come on,” he teased, “and we’ll find a large, well-lit table and get this paperwork out of the way.”

  “I’m not sure if I should—”

  “I’ll do better at my game on Saturday, if I know this report is finished,” he lied. He’d planned every scenario he could imagine with Destiny in mind, even though the bitch still ignored him. His fist clenched. Cindy would be practice. Practice let him win football games, so it made sense to handle relationships in the same way.

  Cindy will have her chance with me after dinner and we’ll spend the night doing it in the back seat.

  Dark, sweaty images filled his brain. He’d already checked out a secluded spot to head to, after dinner. He turned his head away.

  Not a good idea to let her catch me grinning like a kid in a candy shop.

  ***

  As the students disembarked, then disappeared into the dusk, Jacob rolled his weary shoulders, and turned out of the wind. Days grew shorter. Longer nights, spent alone, caused nothing but a dull ache in his groin. In the weeks since his injury, the ache hadn’t dissipated. He missed Destiny so much it hurt.

  He tried to set aside the memories, but the wind whistling through the trees mocked him. Getting involved with a student would complicate things. Subsequently, he had no life.

  He loathed returning to his empty apartment, but with no scheduled classes tomorrow or Friday, he’d have four days off. His knee had cramped up on the return trip. Memories of his life in Boston came into focus, as they drove through city streets, then toured the museum where he’d once worked. That life had included Penelope. He should open the envelope, sign the papers, and get that woman out of his life. Permanently.

  Moving to northern New England, he’d innocently planned to fall in love and make a home with a wonderful woman. Talk about a backfire.

  Peace in Fairfield, New Hampshire, had become as elusive as the peregrine falcons flying over the Garnet Cliffs, because Destiny lived there.

  ***

  As Cindy sipped her drink, Marcus Benton’s attention locked on her mouth. When she ran a pink tongue over her top lip, his body responded. He sneered, remembering what had happened when they ordered drinks. Underage at twenty, she protested, but the waitress never gave Cindy a glance, and brought her a glass of wine. The restaurant was spacious, and just this side of sleazy. Private enough.

  “You’re very pretty.”

  “Thank you, Marcus.”

  He sipped his second glass of beer and savored her shoulder-length white-blonde hair and her elegant neck. Her necklace and earrings glittered in the lighted booth near the back of the restaurant. She straightened her shoulders, as if noting his perusal, but he ignored her self-consciousness. A pretty pink blouse hugged her curves. Cut high, the sheer fabric barely obscured his view of her breasts.

  “I ain’t never seen you wear jeans.”

  She smiled, and sipped her drink. “I prefer skirts over jeans. They give me a sense of superiority over other girls. I have no desire to blend in.”

  “The weather’s getting colder. Do you plan to walk around campus with your legs uncovered?” Not that I mind.

  “I’ll opt for pants once snow falls. I just bought pairs of black corduroys and gray linen slacks at the mall.”

  Marcus pictured sliding those pants down her long legs. “I’m glad you agreed to this date.”

  “This isn’t a date. We’re classmates, Marcus. I’m happy to work with you, but that’s all.”

  He felt his smile falter. His gaze shot to her shoulder, where a silky pink strap peaked out from the neckline of her shirt.

  “Nice.”

  “No free show, Marcus.” Her eyes met his, as she pulled her shirt higher. “You were going to tell me what you thought about the paintings.”

  They slid into more small talk and she ordered a roast beef sandwich with coleslaw, as if trying to keep the cost down.

  Such a smart little bitch. She has no idea that when I get her alone, I’ll pretend she’s Destiny.

  ***

  The moment he spied Destiny walking away from the dining hall, Pete Thayer’s cock hardened. Her attention seemed riveted on the inside of her backpack, so she didn’t notice his approach. He’d cut across campus on his way home from a sex-filled afternoon with a college senior he’d met at Tanya’s Grill. He was still in his uniform, his hair
damp from the shower. The pretty, dark-haired coed had latched on to him last night, before he’d finished his beer.

  She’d persuaded him to walk her home. He hesitated for a split second, glancing around in case Destiny might be in the restaurant, but no such luck. Pete had grinned, and turned all his attention to the girl-at-hand. They’d ended up at the female student’s apartment, and he’d worn her out after an hour.

  He never brought women home with him. Pete reserved that for Destiny Blake.

  When she realized the wisdom of their being together, they would make love all night long, and he’d climax to the bubbling whisper of the river amid her screams of pleasure. If he worked this opportunity right, the dream would come true.

  “Hey there, sweetheart. Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes! I can tell you’re not heading to work. Why don’t we go to my place and get to know one another better?” His eyes glazed over as he began thinking of all the positions they’d soon share…starting with Destiny naked under him.

  “Darn it, Pete, you startled me.” She dropped her keys on the sidewalk. A gust of wind covered her key ring with a blanket of dead late-autumn leaves. She bent down and grabbed them, then continued her walk without another word in his direction.

  “Hey. What’s your hurry?” Pete asked, blocking her path.

  “I’m late for an appointment, so you’ll have to excuse me.”

  “Why do I think you’re avoiding little ol’ me? You know how I feel about you. Throw a guy a bone, will ya?” He smiled, crossed his arms in front of his chest, and stood his ground, letting his gaze rove up and down her lovely body, imagining her panting and moaning in his arms.

  “Pete, please. I think I’ve made it quite clear I’m not interested.”

  How cold.

  He kept silent while he digested her curt reply, but his fingers, hidden under his armpits, clenched. She acted unaware of the anger bubbling near the surface. His thigh muscles locked. When she slipped around him by stepping off the curb, a red haze tinted his vision, while his gaze bore into her back. She climbed into her rust-bucket and headed out of the lot without a glance his way.