The Choice (Doms of Her Life: Heavenly Rising Book 1)

by Shayla Black

  “This girl understands, Sir,” Chastity said. “Please excuse this girl for asking.”

  Somehow her soft acceptance only made Beck feel worse. She’d approached him to sate her need for pain, and he’d done it, wishing he was a thousand miles away the whole time. He couldn’t bring himself to satisfy her in any other way.

  “No apology necessary. You better now?” It wasn’t Chas’s fault that she wasn’t the woman on his mind, and he refused to be a dismissive prick.

  “Oh, so much… Thank you, Sir.”

  A peal of laughter across the room snagged his attention. Around the bar, a group of subs preened and flirted, all but rubbing their half-naked bodies against some Dom.

  The big blond male turned his head, flashing a Hollywood smile.

  Seth. That motherfucker.

  Of course he was here. Liam had put the guy up at Shadows while he was visiting. But why wouldn’t he go the fuck away?

  He’d love to whip out his phone and snap a couple of incriminating shots of Seth with his “harem” to show Heavenly. But Beck wouldn’t break the rules of the club or bend his moral code for the bed-hopping bastard.

  He’d love to know what had happened last night between Seth and Heavenly at Raine’s party. It was definitely something. When Beck had asked her for a recap at lunch earlier today, she’d blushed profusely and dodged his question. While heading back to his office, he’d texted Pike for information. As usual, the DM had given him a smartass response.

  They cozied up in a corner by themselves until she suddenly ran off. Seth chased her. I stopped him. You’re welcome.

  The ten texts he’d sent back for more information had all gone unanswered. Asshole. Why had Heavenly run off? Had Seth ever caught her? Had he seduced his way into her bed? Beck had no idea.

  Biting back a growl, he tamped down his fury and handed Chastity the water bottle from the table beside him. “Will you be okay if I step away to take care of something?”

  “Yes. Thank you, Sir.”

  “Feel free to stay on the couch and float a bit longer.”

  She sat up, gingerly making her way off his lap. “Happily, Sir.”

  With a nod, he watched her curl up with a serene smile and drift. Guilty relief oozed through Beck’s bloodstream as he tossed a soft cotton blanket over her.

  Behind him, another burst of raucous laughter rolled from the bar. He whipped around with a scowl, glaring at Seth and his flock.

  Really, fucker? Last night you were coaxing Heavenly out of her panties, and tonight you’re handing out numbers to subs. Obviously, you pride yourself on excellent cunts-tomer service.

  Rolling his eyes, Beck strode toward his private room. The slap of leather, along with cries and moans around the dungeon, usually soothed his nerves. Tonight, they only reminded him of what—and who—he’d never have, adding another layer of shit to the growing pile.

  Before he could disappear behind the closed door, a firm hand gripped his shoulder. Beck stopped in mid-stride and spun on his heel. Hammer stood, staring, brow raised.

  “Problem?” Beck asked.

  “You tell me.”

  “No. And there shouldn’t be with you anymore. Finally.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” Hammer’s brows knit together.

  “You and Liam have Raine, that big ’ol house, and a baby on the way. Her old man is dead, Satan rest his miserable soul. Since you’re living the dream, why are you here? Oh, god. Tell me you two morons didn’t fuck up again.”

  “No,” Hammer barked. “And I didn’t stop you to talk about Raine. Why didn’t you take Chastity to your room?”

  Beck tensed. “Since when is fucking a sub after a scene a requirement?”

  A smirk tugged one corner of Hammer’s mouth. “Never. But in the past you rarely refused pussy. What’s it been now, three weeks? I’ll bet your hand is getting tired. Should I grab a bottle and meet you in your room for a chat?”

  For the first time, the shoe was on the other foot. It felt too tight. “Unlike you, I don’t have to be shitfaced to discuss my feelings. And I don’t need an intervention.”

  “Good. Then I’ll skip the booze and you can start talking.”

  “What is there to say? I didn’t feel like fucking her.” Beck forced himself to shrug.

  “Your sudden celibacy wouldn’t have anything to do with Heavenly, would it? And before you give me the bullshit denial rolling across your face, I saw your expression when you had to leave the party last night. I know you told Pike to make sure Seth didn’t get too close.”

  “I don’t trust him, and I wanted to make sure she was all right. Speaking of which, did you take her home for me?”

  Hammer shook his head. “Never got the chance.”

  Beck’s blood pressure soared. “Who the hell did?”

  But he had a pretty goddamn good idea. He slid a glance toward the bar, teeth clenched.

  “Not sure. But you seem awfully worried about Seth. Heavenly has you by the balls, doesn’t she?”

  He pinned his longtime pal with a furious glare. “Shut the fuck up.”

  Hammer chuckled. “I’ll be a nice guy and tell you that Seth didn’t take her home, either. So don’t do anything stupid, like storm up to the bar and pick a fight. I’m not sure what happened between them. One minute they were talking, and the next, she was flying out the door. Alone.”

  “You didn’t try to stop her?” Beck gaped.

  “I wasn’t sure she’d actually left until Seth came in cursing. He told me she’d gotten a text, read it, then pulled a Cinderella-style exit.”

  Beck mulled that. He’d seen Heavenly texting someone when he’d caught her alone, too, but she’d never used an incoming message as a smokescreen to escape him. What had Seth done to make her bolt, try to haul her up to one of Raine’s guest rooms and leave the aftermath of her innocence all over the sheets?

  “Did she tell Raine why she left abruptly?”

  “She called this morning to apologize. Said that ‘a friend’ needed help.” Hammer shrugged.

  Friend? She’d never talked about any fucking friends. Well, besides him.

  Beck needed answers from her. But first, he intended to make a few things clear to Sir Dick-for-Brains.

  “Thanks,” Beck snapped as he shouldered his way past Hammer and barreled toward the bar.

  Hammer yanked on his arm. “Don’t be stupid. And don’t make me kick you out of the club.”

  “It wouldn’t be the first time.” Beck jerked free and stormed into the bar.

  “You could keep all five of us in your thrall at the same time, couldn’t you, Sir Seth?” Kristen, a curvy sub with pink hair, purred.

  “I’m sure he could,” Eden, a very active sub, offered with a sensual purse of her lips as she laid her hand on his thigh. “You’re so good one-on-one, and we’d be happy to let you try us together.”

  Kat, Vinyl, and Glitter all nodded enthusiastically.

  Beck shook his head. This guy got more ass than a toilet seat.

  Seth plucked up Eden’s wrist and lifted her hand from his leg. “Maybe I could have you all panting in less than ten seconds. If I wanted to.”

  Yeah, because you’d only last ten seconds…

  At the chorus of eager female coos, Beck wanted to puke.

  Seth merely grabbed his bottle. “Tonight, I’m just enjoying my beer, ladies.”

  Beck forced an affable smile as he approached. “Sorry, girls. You’ll have to Top Master Seth from the bottom another time. I need to talk to him.”

  The subs’ expressions ranged from guilt to disappointment as they scampered away.

  Seth turned to him with an annoyed glower. “Hi, Beck. You’re as welcome as poop in a punchbowl.”

  “Yeah? I wish like hell your parents had practiced birth control, but since they didn’t do the world a favor and we’re both here, you and I are going to have some words.”

  “Why are you up my ass? Didn’t slicing Chastity open with a whip sooth
e your savage beast?”

  His lack of satisfaction was none of Seth’s business. Making the asshole back away from Heavenly was. “What did you do to Heavenly at Raine’s party?”

  The bastard sent him a smug grin. “We…talked.”

  “Is that code for getting her drunk and trying to take her to bed?”

  “Is that what she said? I guess you two chatted over lunch since she told me you’re great ‘friends.’”

  Beck seethed. He didn’t need a fucking reminder that Heavenly had labeled him a pal. Knowing she’d told Seth only chafed him more. “Back off.”

  “Why? You don’t have any claim on the girl.”

  “The last thing she needs is a player like you. I’ve spent time getting to know Heavenly. If you’d bothered to do the same, you’d know how innocent she is.”

  “Oh, I know. And last night proved she’s ripe and more than ready to give away her sweetly guarded virginity.”

  Beck’s gut churned. “What the fuck does that mean?”

  “She begged me to tell her what I’d do to her if she were mine. So I gave her every dirty detail of the things I’d do to her body with my fingers, my cock, and of course, my tongue. That woman has the most beautiful blush from head to toe when she’s aroused.”

  Beck’s blood rushed and pooled like a living volcano about to erupt. He didn’t know what he wanted more, to knock out the prick’s teeth or eviscerate him with the bar knife. “I’m going to kill you.”

  “Don’t blow an artery, Doctor. I didn’t touch her…yet,” Seth drawled. “But I damn well intend to drag her beneath me and take every bit of her soft, lush innocence. Just so you know.”

  “Have some fucking decency. If you do that and run back to New York, you’ll leave her in a million shattered pieces. She doesn’t need that. She doesn’t need you.”

  “And you think she needs you?” Seth cocked his head toward Chastity, who still lay curled on the sofa, glowing ass lined in angry red welts. “Do Heavenly a favor and fuck off. We both know she needs a man who can be gentle, and that’s not you.”

  “I can be fucking gentle!”

  “Don’t kid yourself.”

  “You know what? I admit it. I’m all wrong for her. But have you looked in a mirror?”

  Seth scowled. “You don’t know me.”

  “Oh, please. You’re as predictable as a B movie. And as one of Heavenly’s friends, I intend to protect her from assholes like you. And if you hurt her, I will make you suffer. I know how.”

  “Bring it. I’ve flattened guys like you in my sleep. If you weren’t so busy fisting your cock and playing her ‘professional daddy,’ you might finally see the only way you’ll have Heavenly is in your dreams.”

  “Outside. Now! I’m going to rip your head off and shit down your throat.”

  Instead of leaping to his feet and stalking to the parking lot, Seth frowned. “Holy shit.”

  “What? Are you too much of a pussy?”

  “No, you stupid bastard. I’d wipe the parking lot with your ugly face,” Seth tossed back. “Listen to us. Don’t you get it?”

  “Get what?”

  “The way we’re fighting…” Seth waved his hand between them. “Doesn’t this feel like Hammer-and-Liam déjà vu?”

  Fuck. The jackass had a point. The two of them were heading down the same path they’d helped Hammer and Liam navigate less than a month ago. The difference was, those two had been friends for a decade before battling bitterly for Raine. Finally, they’d realized they needed to share her, but the war leading up to that truce had been ugly. More than once, Beck had been sure it would end in casualties. There’d certainly been enough curses hurled, fists thrown, and blood spilled.

  He and Seth had zero history. They also had zero trust. And zero intention of sharing a drink, much less Heavenly.

  “There won’t be any fighting. There will be me protecting the girl and you fucking off.”

  “It must be tough to pretend you’re so altruistic when your dick is that hard.”

  “Get your thoughts out of my pants.”

  “We can trade one-liners all night, but I’ve got your number.”

  “Yeah? Lose it. I’m going to make sure you never lay a finger on her.”

  “You can’t stop me.”

  Beck cocked a brow at him. “Watch me.”

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Thank God it’s Friday.

  Heavenly sat in the metal chair next to the nurses’ lockers at the back of the ER and groaned in relief as she tore off the ratty athletic shoes that had long ago ceased to support her instep. The hole near the heel would soon become noticeable. Tomorrow, she’d have to find the time—and money—to search the second-hand shops for another pair, before she started her new job. Of course she’d rather spend the holidays with her father, in case this was their last together. That hurt, but she had to be realistic. And practical. Since the break from school afforded her time, she had to spend every possible moment making money to cover their mounting bills.

  She’d never waitressed before, but she was willing to work hard. The tips at this place were supposedly generous—not surprising since the uniform barely covered the essentials. In time, she’d get over her self-consciousness. She hoped.

  With a sigh, Heavenly opened her locker. Thankfully, she found her backpack and its contents untouched. Even better, the few precious dollars she possessed were still in her wallet.

  During her first few days at the hospital, the nurses had played some harmless pranks on her, which she’d written off as hazing. But the following week, someone had painted a slur inside her locker. A few days later, her forty dollars for groceries had disappeared. Heavenly suspected Kathryn was responsible. The nurse specialist had become particularly petulant once Dr. Beckman turned attentive and protective.

  Heavenly shoved her shoes in her backpack with a sigh and donned her sandals. As she made her way toward the street exit, she spotted Dr. Beckman in the lobby, lounging in one of the chairs and glancing at his watch. Was he waiting for someone?

  She hadn’t seen him since he’d left the party abruptly. The insecure part of her had worried he no longer wanted to spend time with her because he saw her as the little girl he always called her. She’d missed lunches with him, not because he made sure she ate every day, even in his absence, though that was nice. No, each moment she spent with him, she soaked him up like a sponge—his dissecting intelligence, his robust laugh, his cutting humor, his dark eyes that held a hint of the devil.

  At the sight of him, her heart skipped a beat. “Dr. Beckman?”

  His head snapped up, and he stood. “I was hoping to catch you. Sorry I haven’t been at lunch the last couple of days. A few patients with difficult conditions and…”

  He’d sought her out to apologize and explain? Oh, my gosh. She smiled in giddy relief. Having him near again made Heavenly’s world feel right once more.

  “How dare those life-or-death patients be so demanding?”

  “Yes, well… Thankfully, they’re going to live.”

  “Of course. They have you.”

  She shouldn’t flirt when he didn’t want more than a professional relationship, and she tried not to. But nothing changed the fact that he made her both gooey and shivery at once.

  Then again, so did Seth.

  And that baffled her.

  For the hundredth time since Raine’s party, the big blond PI’s verbal seduction whispered through her head and made her ache.

  When she saw him again, would he seduce her with more than his voice? Would he actually put his hands and his mouth on her? She’d loved the idea when she lay alone on her pallet at night, tuning out her father’s gentle snoring as she touched herself and tried to find the mythical pleasure called orgasm. Of course, she thought of Dr. Beckman then, too.

  “Heavenly?”

  Feeling herself blush, she blinked up at him. The doctor watched her every expression.

  Gosh, here she was talking to one man she ha
d less-than-platonic feelings for while fantasizing about the other. It happened whenever she was with either of them. Why did she have those feelings for them both? What did that make her?

  A ridiculous girl with pie-in-the-sky fantasies.

  “Yes. Sorry. Hi.”

  Dr. Beckman stepped closer, dropping his voice. “Are you all right?”

  “I’m good. Happy to see you.”

  “How have you been?”

  “Fine. You?”

  He studied her more intently. “I’m sorry I couldn’t stay at the party. I heard you left abruptly, too. What happened?”

  Raine’s gathering had begun with so much promise…and ended so terribly when her father had called to say that he’d fallen near the kitchen and hit his head. “Nothing much. I didn’t stay long because a friend needed my help.”

  “Before you left, I heard you and Seth were deep in conversation.”

  “Yes.” She breathed the word more than spoke it. “We talked.”

  Now Dr. Beckman scowled. “Did he come on to you?”

  Did he ever…

  She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and smiled. “He might have.”

  “And?”

  Heavenly was capable of taking care of herself, but she adored the way Dr. Beckman protected her. Maybe that was simply his nature or maybe he just felt sorry for the shy girl. If he thought she was too inept to take care of herself, she didn’t really want to know.

  “Oh, don’t worry. It wasn’t creepy, like Dr. Manning. It was…nice. More than nice, actually.” She sighed. “No one has ever talked to me like that.”

  She didn’t think he’d mind hearing about her feelings for another man since he’d never given her any romantic vibes. Even when Dr. Manning had accused him of wanting her, he’d totally denied it. While Raine was fast becoming a friend, Dr. Beckman was probably the best one she had right now. He listened so well… She needed to appreciate the rapport they shared and stop wishing for more.

  “How did he talk to you?” he demanded. “What did he say?”

  She wouldn’t repeat Seth’s words. They were private, his gift to her. Sure, he’d likely just been flirting to pass the time at a party where he didn’t know many of the guests, either. But his attention had meant the world to her.