Forever One

by L. F. Hampton

  Only a fool would disturb them. Then again, he knew who the fool would be. Without speaking, barely touching her, he helped Cayla into her satin robe before he jerked a loincloth around his waist. As efficient as she, he shut himself from her. This time the seesaw of desire and rejection coming so quickly after their shared warmth wore at his defenses. Anger threatened to control him. Not daring to look at her again, he snapped open the door and scowled at Sean.

  “What?” He knew Cayla was still hurt by her brother’s estrangement. He felt the cutting edge of her pain and vowed to forbid any further disrespect to her, no matter how badly he felt about Sean’s wide-eyed stare. No one showed disrespect to Cayla. She was his mate and Kasara’s ly’teal despite the Elders’ edict. He didn’t fault them though. The old ones agreed that long years of mind-linking to a human had changed him until only a human would ever accept him. They waited for proof that their union was truly a proper joining. He wasn’t sure he could show them results anytime soon. Especially, if they were constantly interrupted all the time! In frustration, he ground his teeth. His union with Cayla would produce an heir, of that he was certain, but that wasn’t why they coupled so much. The fact was—he loved coupling with her. It was only then that she was true to him, when her fears were quiet, her doubts mute. Her brother was easier to read.

  The flush of heat that colored Sean’s cheekbones signaled his displeasure at what he saw in the room. He knew what he had interrupted. Too bad for the boy. All of Kasara would accept their joining, even Cayla’s sibling. When Sean didn’t speak, Vadyn nearly growled, “Is there a reason for your unannounced visit?” Each word rolled in the quiet. Flushing a deeper red, Sean stood straighter in the doorway.

  “Yes-s.” He coughed then squared his shoulders. “I need to speak with Cayla.” His brittle glance flicked behind Vadyn, taking in the cozy, silk-laden room with its bright pillows flung in abandonment, splashing color while scattered clothing littered the colorful tapestry rug. Brilliant swatches of glistening bed coverings, rumpled from use, hung from the bed, draping onto the floor. Elusive heavy scents of their passionate lovemaking hung in the air. Cayla stood at a window with her back to them. Sean’s nostrils flared. Vadyn felt his hatred as clear as the wind on his face from the open casement. Unbidden, his own rose to match it only to be interrupted.

  Don’t, Vadyn, please. This time Cayla’s mind entreaty was clear to him. Only for her sake did he swallow his anger. If he wanted to win her over, it wouldn’t be wise to kill her brother. He motioned with a stiff hand flick for Sean to enter.

  “Anything you have to say to Cayla can be said to me.” He kept his voice low and waited patiently. But he missed nothing in Sean’s hard expression. Obviously, the boy struggled to rein in his displeasure. His voice was carefully controlled too, a stoic trait he had no doubt learned from his father. For a moment his heart stuttered. How often in years past had he watched Logan exhibit the same traits? He winced at the familiar memories that flooded him, and he noted Cayla’s flinch although she didn’t turn around. Sean’s voice was welcomed by both.

  “I need to speak to my sister—alone.” He remained calm although his stare blazed. Moments passed before Vadyn had himself in check enough to growl for Sean’s ears only.

  “I warn you. Do not hurt her, Sean—or you will answer to me.”

  “I won’t intentionally hurt her.” The boy’s whisper quivered slightly before his chin rose.

  “See that you don’t—intentionally or otherwise. Or—” With that implied threat hanging in midair, he spun on his heel and stalked into the adjoining room. Looking aside, he watched Sean rake his raven hair back to his shoulders. Again, hurt knifed through him. Logan also had such a habit of rumpling his hair from his forehead when he was upset. Memories haunted him with a dull ache to his chest. This time, he was glad to avoid Sean’s eyes. They, too, reminded him of someone he loved. The green irises were so much like Elizabeth’s; he felt rather than heard Cayla’s gasp and cut off his thoughts. Again, he had been careless. More reasons for Cayla to hold against him. Frustrated anger again rose up to stifle him. Quickly, he drew in deep breaths of fresh air from the window. He would let Sean talk to Cayla, but by the gods, he wouldn’t leave. His subtle link to their conversation would keep him informed on what Sean wanted. The boy didn’t know whom he was dealing with . . .

  Chapter 8

  “I MEAN IT, CAYLA. I want to go home.”

  “You are home.” She snapped a whisper but knew that Vadyn heard every word nonetheless. She hadn’t completely mastered the art of mind-blocking that the warlord did so well—yet. But even Vadyn slipped from time to time. Either that, or she was getting stronger at reading him. She wasn’t sure she wanted that strength. Damn it, this power was all so new to her—troublesome and invasive. But she showed none of her concern to her brother who was acting more like his belligerent self. His chin jutted at her, and his eyes so like his mother’s, that Vadyn loved so well, glared at her. She ignored Vadyn’s mind apology and focused all her attention on her brother.

  “I mean home to Earth. Damn it, you know what I mean.” Sean scowled deeper at her and launched into what she knew was a long, well-rehearsed speech of all the reasons why he wanted to leave. She could tell that her brother had worked himself up into a real snit over her taking Vadyn as a mate. He wouldn’t say so, but he despised her choice of husbands. That thought lingered like a mountain in the room, but neither spoke of it. Instead, their tense argument about his leaving raged back and forth with neither giving an inch. Finally, she heaved a tired sigh. She tired easily these days.

  “What’s the real reason you want to leave, Sean?” She stared at him intently. She knew her brother. “What are you hiding? It’s not like you to run away.” She fisted her hands at her sides. “Tell me the reason, or so help me, gods, I will not help you.”

  Sean stopped striding back and forth. His chest rose and fell before he rasped, “You want to know why I can’t stand to remain here?” He sucked in a breath then fairly yelled, “I killed them!” His voice dropped lower but the conviction in it remained. “I killed them—our mother and father, all right?” He turned his back and placed his palms on a window ledge. He reared back on his stiffened elbows. His head bowed. “It’s my fault they died. I took their skimmer, their only means of escape. I didn’t hear them call over the com.” He turned to stare at her. She had been shocked into silence, but he must have read the question on her face. “Why did I take it? Because I’m a fool.” He lifted his chin even more belligerently. “I took the skimmer to spy on Tallas.”

  “On . . . Tallas?” She echoed the name of Vadyn’s first lieutenant. Tallas was also one of her closest friends. The female warrior had also been a friend to Sean when the two were younger. Now, Sean normally avoided her as he did every Kasar. “Whyever would you spy on her?”

  “Vadyn’s troops were training in Tuberon Valley. I wanted to watch Tallas with the other lieutenants in mock battle.” His voice lowered, and he picked at a loose stone on the rocky window ledge. “I hid just over the rise. But on the way there, I was following the dunes too closely and stalled the skimmer. I fouled the engines with sand and lost the com. I was too busy watching Tallas to fix it.” He turned his stricken glance back to her. “I didn’t hear Mother’s cry for help—it’s my fault they died.”

  Cayla shook her head but refrained from taking his arm. He wouldn’t want her touch or her sympathy although he had it. Sean was a real idiot even though he was her older brother. She nevertheless tried to calm his guilt. His eyes held so much pain. “It’s no more your fault than mine. I shouldn’t have convinced Vadyn to go riding so far away.” Her cheeks burned at Sean’s scathing pointed look. She raised her chin. “Well, it was my birthing celebration after all. I asked him for a present and he gave it.”

  “And now you’ve gotten everything you’ve ever wanted, haven’t you?” Sean said with a soft sneer. B
oth remembered that long ago afternoon when he had tried to convince Cayla that she would never have Vadyn—that the warlord was already linked with their mother. From the outer room, she felt Vadyn’s surprise at her memories of the incident.

  For the first time, he discovered the reasons for Sean’s hated. He never knew that Sean had spied on his private Council meetings with Elizabeth and Logan. Often the three had delved into Kasara’s policies and decisions. But Sean’s discovery of the mind-link had led him to twist their shared relationship into something other than what it was. Sean’s resentment spewed like a fountain. He continued, his voice shaking with suppressed rage. “Father was always on the outside while they had their secret thoughts, their special communications. It made me sick for him. The el’kota’s great hero—his right-hand in battle—what lyr-syn shit!” He gave a strangled cackle. “Our father was nothing more than an outsider—window dressing for Kasara’s great warlord.” He peeled off a strip of silk from the window drape and let the scrap fly into the wind. “I know why Father fought so well. Trained so hard. Do you, Cayla?” He turned and glared at her again. “He only protected Vadyn because he thought Mother would die if the warlord died. And we meant nothing to Father. If Mother died, he didn’t want to live either.” Sean shook his head. “I honestly thought there was no way for you to join with Vadyn as connected as he was to Mother, but, obviously, I was wrong. Well, you have him now—so can I go home to Earth before the sight of the two of you together sickens me to death?”

  She swiftly turned her back to Sean and barely contained her rage. It roared up and down her spine as if it was a musical instrument running the scales. Her throat swelled with the need to yell at his stupidity. She dared not look at him. It took a supreme effort just to control her voice. Her soft words surprised her. “Sean, you really are a damned fool. You’re so wrong about so many things. But I won’t waste my breath. I won’t keep you here.” Her voice and her heart fell. “I can’t stand the sight of you either.” She straightened back to him and continued without a quiver. “But I won’t ask the el’kota for anything for you. If you want a ship to leave Kasara, ask him yourself.”

  Vadyn felt as well as heard Cayla’s anguish. She had turned away, poised ready to flee the room. Her heart ached for her brother’s torment. Her thoughts roiled, but she refused to help Sean. His hatred and resentment were overwhelming. She felt lost, again betrayed by emotions.

  You are not alone, beloved. I am with you—always. His gentle mind touch caressed her, soothed her displeasure. Most of the time, she resented their link. This time, she felt only gratitude. He wouldn’t intrude until asked. She turned again to Sean and raised her chin. “Ask Vadyn yourself, Sean. You owe him that much at least for all your stupid notions.” And damn you. She muttered the curse to herself. Her brother was wrong, but she knew better than to try and explain. He’d never listen. Why must he always be so selfishly angry at everyone that he couldn’t see or hear the truth? She swallowed the thought that came a little too close to home.

  Vadyn listened as Sean approached him from behind, but waited to turn around. The halting steps stopped, shuffled into silence. Finally, Sean cleared his throat.

  “I—uh, Uncle, I have a favor to ask.”

  Ah, so now he became “uncle” again. He snorted and turned. Sean’s gaze widened on his stoic features. He waited for Vadyn’s response. When none came, Sean’s voice grew bolder. “I know that you will take care of Cayla and that”—he hesitated then raised his chin—“well, I have no other family here. I want to go home.” The rest of his words came out in a rush. “I may still have a grandmother on Earth. I wish to see her. She has a right to know about her son, her family.”

  Vadyn shared Cayla’s quick intake of breath. In her grief, she had forgotten about her father’s Earthly mother, their grandmother, Amanda. Vadyn also held fond memories of Amanda, Logan’s mother. She had been a good friend to him when he had been stranded on Earth. “What makes you think you need my permission to leave Kasara?” Not a flicker of emotion leaked through his control. He knew some of his frustrated anger was coming from Cayla’s link, so he dimmed the connection and focused on Sean’s words.

  “Well, I need more than your permission. I need your help in getting there.” Glistening perspiration broke over Sean’s forehead. “I’ll have to use a Kasar ship to reach Earth.” He knew the young man was fighting to hold his temper. He also knew Sean hated asking for his help. Waiting just long enough to lengthen the discomfort for the insults and pain he had brought to Cayla, Vadyn smiled thinly. “I will ask for a volunteer to pilot you.”

  “I don’t need anyone to take me.” Another angry flush covered Sean’s handsome features. “You know that I can pilot any ship you have.” His flush deepened.

  “That may be. But are you suggesting you just take a Kasar ship back to Earth?” He kept his voice steady but raised his brows. “Surely, you don’t expect to keep our ship there.”

  Sean stammered, “No, I didn’t mean . . . I didn’t think about that.”

  Vadyn would have liked to cuff Sean’s shoulder in sincere affection but knew in his heart that Sean wouldn’t welcome his touch. Their long-delayed talk would have to wait even longer. The boy wouldn’t want to hear anything from him now. But that day would come. He would be back. Vadyn would wait. The Kasar were noted for their patience in awaiting both affection and revenge. And Vadyn’s affection for Sean remained undiminished despite time and misunderstandings. “I will seek a pilot tomorrow. You will have your transport, and, Sean”—he searched the serious, closed expression on Sean’s face—“may you find happiness there.”

  Sean gave a slight nod but refused to thank Vadyn or Cayla. He did endure his sister’s one swift, loving embrace as she bid him goodnight before he hurried from their presence. Vadyn looked in Cayla’s eyes and read her anguish.

  “What if no pilot volunteers?”

  Chapter 9

  CAYLA DIDN’T HAVE to worry after all.

  “Tallas, you don’t have to do this.” She helped pack a small war bag with Tallas’s meager necessities.

  “I want to, Cayla.” Tallas, her childhood friend, studied her with those great golden Kasar eyes that knew so much but revealed so little. “Sean needs me. I can’t let him go alone. Besides, I promised your mother on the day of his naming to protect him—always. If that means I go to Earth, I go.” She shook her hair back from her face and swiftly braided the thick mass into a warrior’s knot at the base of her neck. “He may hate me, but he needs me.”

  “He doesn’t hate you!” Astonished, she grabbed Tallas’s long fingers, clutching them in her hands. She felt the corded knots in the knuckle joints that contained the long nails that became lethal talons in battle, so very much like Vadyn’s. And Tallas had been in many battles. Countless scars hid in her friend’s soft pelt. She shuddered, remembering the bloody visions she had shared in Vadyn’s memories. Surely, Tallas wasn’t a part of those. She was too young, barely older than her and Sean. She had been a friend of theirs since childhood. “How could you possibly think that Sean could hate you?” she asked.

  “Oh, Cayla.” The warrior shook her head and gave a thin, patient smile. “Sean hates all of us Kasar. Didn’t you know?” She waited for her statement to sink in before she continued in a softer voice. “For the past seven turns, Sean has fought against everything about us. Think, Cayla, when have you last seen him in my company? Or in any Kasar’s presence, willingly?”

  Cayla wrinkled her brow amid her whirling thoughts. When had she last considered anything Sean did? Shocked disbelief filled her with the truth. “Why didn’t I notice this before? How could I have been so blind? Was I always so caught up in my own selfish thoughts and desires?”

  Tallas batted her shoulder rather roughly. “You were only a child yourself, Cayla. You couldn’t stop his rejection of us. We all saw it, but couldn’t prevent it. Not even your mother
.”

  “But did Mother know why?”

  “I think Quanta knew, but wouldn’t speak of it. She just acted more kindly toward me.” Tallas stopped and bowed her head. Obviously, she still grieved, as they all did. Cayla knew her mother had been the closest thing to a parent that Tallas had known—outside of Vadyn, who had fostered Tallas when her own mother had died, a time when she was merely a cub. For a moment, unexpected jealousy flared in Cayla’s thoughts. Jealous of Tallas’s time with Vadyn? She surely didn’t just hear the pleased mind-chuckle she thought she did, did she?

  A knock sounded. The warlord called to her through the door even though he could have spoken in her mind. Oh, he was still playing at being polite, wasn’t he? Tallas pulled her hands free from Cayla’s grip and straightened to attention. She obviously awaited her last minute instructions from her leader. With a suppressed grumble about an arrogant ass, Cayla hurried to let Vadyn in. Funny, how he always showed up just when she thought of him. Secretly, she craved more and more of his attention. At times, her new knowledge about Sean’s estrangement left her feeling so cold and alone. And now she felt so guilty. For how long had her brother struggled with no one to talk to? How long had she been blind to his problems? She even felt guilty about her newfound happiness, giving in to a strange loneliness, as if her brother had already gone. Stepping inside, Vadyn lifted his arms, offering warm comfort in his quick embrace, and, for once, she met his sheltering hug with welcomed but unspoken gratitude. He held her gently until her shudders stopped. Her jumbled thoughts quieted. She stiffened. Whatever was she thinking? She didn’t need him for strength. A low chuckle again echoed in her mind. She stepped back, and Vadyn let her go without protest. He faced the waiting Tallas, his face held in severe beauty. No one but Cayla knew the quick stab of pain he suppressed at her rejection. Her cheeks burned.