Redemption

by Jessica Ashe

  “ ‘Shove off?’ ” Adrian asked, mocking my choice of words. “Aren’t you the polite one. I think the words you were looking for were ‘fuck off.’ You remember that word, right? Fuck?”

  “I don’t need to use vulgar language to get my point across,” I replied, crossing my arms over my chest and pushing up my tiny breasts in the process. Not that he could see them anyway. I wore a cardigan that was buttoned up enough to completely cover my chest even though it was easily warm enough to go without.

  “Oh really? In that case, when I took your virginity you should have been saying ‘oh yes, put your penis inside my vaginal canal with more speed and pressure.’ Was that what you said? I’m sure it was more along the lines of ‘oh yes, fuck me. Fuck me. Harder, harder.’ ”

  I cringed as I thought back to the third time we’d fucked that night. The second time I had been on top of him and ridden him hard, but I’d still not said a lot. The third time, something had come over me and I’d moaned in the same way porn stars did. Presumably.

  What if someone in the room next door had heard us? I must have sounded like a complete slut.

  “I’m going to walk home now,” I said slowly. I was blushing furiously, but there wasn’t much I could do about that so I ignored it. “Don’t you dare follow me.”

  “Vicky,” Caiden said as he grabbed my wrist.

  I turned and yanked my hand free from his wrist before placing both hands on his chest and pushing him hard. He stumbled back with a shocked look in his face and ended up in the bush behind him.

  I nearly apologised out of habit, but then forced a smile and turned for home. My childhood house was located off the main roads and down a long driveway. We lived on the outskirts of town, and with such a long driveway we were fairly secluded from most other houses. I often saw envious looks from nearby residents as they peered up the driveway to catch a glimpse of the house and the surrounding land.

  As I walked up the driveway, I noticed a second car parked next to my dad’s silver Mercedes. My knowledge of cars extended to recognizing the difference between some with three doors and some with five, but that was about it. This car looked brand new and more expensive than my dad’s which meant he would soon go out and buy a new one soon. He hated having friends with a nicer car than his.

  The new car had the familiar logo of a rental company on the back window. Rented cars were a familiar enough site around London, but not many tourists came visiting our little town.

  I dug my keys out of my bag, but the front door opened before I needed to use them. My dad stood in the doorway and beamed with pride at seeing me return. Something must be wrong. Dad never looked at me like that. He would never say as much, but he didn’t actually like having me at home. I got in his way. The last time I’d come back he’d completely forgotten about it and gone on a golfing holiday to Italy with some friends.

  “Victoria, welcome home,” he said with feigned enthusiasm.

  It was then I noticed the woman standing behind him. A blonde lady, with a generous bosom, and an even more generous helping of make up. My first thought was that she looked like a TV personality. My second thought was that I recognized her. I was right on both counts, although I mainly knew her face from books not television.

  The woman smiled at me and held out her hand. “Hello Victoria, I’m Sheri Ramsden.”

  “I know who you are, Ms. Ramsden,” I replied, shaking her hand excitedly. “I’m a big fan.” Sheri was a famous chef and I had one of her cookbooks in my bag right now. I just barely resisted the temptation to ask for her autograph until I knew why she was here.

  Sheri looked over my shoulder and her face turned sour. “There you are,” she said sternly. “Where have you been?”

  I looked over and saw Caiden standing there openly holding his box of condoms.

  “Don’t panic, I’m here now,” Caiden said calmly, walking into my house as if he owned the place. “So what was it you wanted to talk about? This had better be important, Mum.”

  Dad ushered us all inside and told Caiden and I to go and sit in the lounge. I didn’t intend to be alone in the same room as him, but when Sheri walked in as well I decided it would be safe to follow.

  Dad went to make some cups of tea for everyone, which immediately put me on edge. Dad was acting far too nice; he never made tea, even when we had guests. When Mum was around he would tell her to do it and now that she no longer lived with us he would usually have me make the drinks.

  Sheri sat down on the middle of the sofa, but didn’t look entirely comfortable. She wouldn’t look at either Caiden or me and she kept picking at her fingers as if nervous.

  I sat down in the armchair that used to be Mum’s favourite seat and Caiden sat on the ottoman. He immediately pulled out his phone and began typing away as if he didn’t have a care in the world. Surely he must be wondering what was going on as well? Or did he already know?

  I’d grown up in this house yet right now I felt like a stranger, especially with Sheri sat to my left. I’d admired her ever since I started taking cooking seriously and it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that I wanted to be like her one day. On any other occasion I would be delighted to have her in my home, but Caiden had ruined that for me.

  He didn’t even have the decency to take his shoes off before coming inside. How could he be Sheri’s son? Sheri always looked immaculately dressed and, while that was sometimes for the camera, she still carried an air of sophistication about her that was the polar opposite from the debauched way Caiden looked and dressed.

  In addition to the tattoo on the back of his neck, I could also see the ones going down his entire right arm all the way to the wrist. I thought back to when I had first seen him naked and remembered that the arm tattoo was connected to the one on his neck. He also had a tattoo on his right calf although that was covered by his jeans at the moment.

  Next to Caiden on the ottoman was Caiden’s large box of condoms that he had just thrown down there as if it was just a pack of gum. We’d only had sex a week ago and I distinctly remembered there had been at least five condoms left in the packet when I bailed from the hotel in the morning. Obviously he hadn’t been lying when he said I didn’t keep him satisfied.

  I felt a twinge of jealousy in my chest as I pictured him with other women. I didn’t care about the ones before me. I’d picked him solely because he had experience with other women. Well, that and the biceps that my eyes couldn’t look away from. And the muscular back. And the messy, dishevelled hair that just begged for me to run my hands through it. Just those things.

  I ached as I pictured other girls pulling his hair as they fucked. In my head, I heard Caiden tell them how much better they were than me. He probably screwed them in all sorts of positions we never got to like ‘doggy style’ and… other ones. They’d probably given him head too.

  Why hadn’t I given him a blow job? I’d been so selfish. No wonder he had to get his satisfaction elsewhere after me. I remembered going down towards his penis and seeing it close up after we’d screwed. It was a good job I hadn’t seen it in its full glory before he put it inside me; I’d have chickened out and run a mile.

  I’d heard the rumours of him being well-hung, but I hadn’t known what well-hung truly entailed. Say one thing about me, when I do things, I don’t do them in half measures. I didn’t lose my virginity to a fellow virgin with an average penis. I lost it with an experienced guy with a monster cock.

  Finally Dad came back into the room carrying a tray with four cups of tea on it. I raised my eyebrows at my dad’s shoddy attempt at impressing his guests. He clearly still had no idea where the nice china was, so the four tea cups were all mismatched mugs of different shapes and sizes. He brought out some biscuits and encouraged Sheri and Caiden to dunk the biscuits in the tea “as is traditional in England.”

  Dad had never dunked a biscuit in his life. If he had, he would have known that you don’t give Rich Tea biscuits to someone inexperienced with the art of dunking, wh
ich encompassed most Americans. That was just asking for a “Code Spoon” situation. At least let them get started on Hobnobs or Digestives as a practise run.

  Fortunately Sheri rejected the offer of biscuits while Caiden just shoved one in his mouth without dunking. My father smiled awkwardly at him and sat down close to Sheri. Very close to Sheri as it turned out.

  “Thank you both for coming today,” my father began. Was he speaking to Sheri and Caiden? Or me and Caiden? “As you have both no doubt noticed...” he trailed off as he caught sight of the box of condoms. Caiden just stared at my father as if it were the most normal thing in the world to plonk a box of condoms down in a stranger’s house. “As you have no doubt noticed, we have a big announcement to make here today.”

  He was talking to Caiden and me. The big announcement was coming from Dad and Sheri. I might have been a virgin as of just seven days ago, but I wasn’t completely naive. Sheri’s knee was nearly touching my dad’s and the way they were angled towards each other meant I shouldn’t have been surprised by what I was about to hear.

  “Sheri and I,” Dad said slowly, “have been spending a lot of time together recently and have grown rather fond of each other.”

  Oh God, don’t say it. Don’t say it. I glanced over at Caiden, hoping to see him looking as horrified as I felt, but he just smiled at me. He knows what’s going on and he doesn’t care. He thinks it’s funny.

  Sheri looked like she was about to speak next. The whole thing had clearly been rehearsed so that they could take turns. “Royston and I—” Sheri started, before Caiden interrupted.

  “Your name’s Royston?” Caiden asked, incredulously. “Fucking hell.”

  “Caiden,” Sheri snapped. “Watch your language. Royston and I,” she stared at Caiden, challenging him to make another comment, “are an item.”

  “I asked Sheri to marry me,” Dad said, taking hold of Sheri’s hand. “Much to my surprise and delight, she has agreed to do me the honour of becoming my wife.”

  “You’re getting married?” I asked. Even though I had predicted what my dad had been about to say, actually hearing the words leave his mouth had been a shock, and my words sounded unusual as I asked the obvious question.

  “Yes, dear,” Dad said. He never called me ‘dear’ but apparently being nice to me was part of this new dynamic we would have to get used to.

  “So we’re all... family now?” I asked.

  “Don’t worry sweetie,” Sheri said. “I have no intention of replacing Stephanie.”

  I didn’t care about Sheri replacing my mother, because there was no way in hell she could ever do that. I admired Sheri and would probably grow close to her, but she wasn’t my mum. As long as I kept in touch with Mum and spoke to her regularly, Sheri would never take that role from her.

  Dad had been slowly removing all signs of Mum from the house anyway. All the old furniture that she loved and cared for while Dad was at work, was being replaced by new, modern pieces that felt out-of-place in our old home.

  No, I didn’t care about Sheri replacing my mum. What I cared about was sitting to the right of me. Caiden pursed his lips and blew me a kiss when Dad and Sheri weren’t looking.

  He was loving every minute of this. What’s more, this news clearly hadn’t come as a surprise to him. Caiden was the type of guy to take everything in his stride, but even with his reckless, carefree attitude, news as big as this should have come as a shock. But he knew. How long had he known for? Had he known when we slept together?

  Caiden had been reluctant to sleep with me. That had come as a shock. He didn’t have any standards as far as I could tell, and yet that night he had hesitated. Surely I couldn’t be that repulsive?

  I had a slim figure and even though my breasts were small they were at least pert. I got more than enough wolf whistles walking down the street to maintain some degree of confidence in my figure.

  Had he hesitated because he didn’t want to have sex with his new step-sister? Why the hell had he let this happen? I shivered and felt a sudden—and urgent—need to throw up. I didn’t care about my dad marrying Sheri. I’d long since ceased caring about what Dad did. But Caiden as a step-brother? That was too much.

  “Are you okay?” Sheri asked. “I know this can’t have been easy for you to hear, but we didn’t know how else to break the news. Your father wanted to tell you over the phone a few weeks ago, but I thought it would be better in person.”

  A few weeks ago. A few weeks ago would have been perfect. If I had known a few weeks ago I would never have slept with Caiden. I’d still be a virgin, but at least I wouldn’t have slept with my… I couldn’t even think it.

  “Yeah, sis,” Caiden said, drawing the short syllable out longer than I would have thought possible. “It’s not that bad having me for a brother is it?”

  Dad and Sheri were looking at me, so Caiden took the opportunity to bring his fingers close to his mouth in a V-shape before running his tongue between them.

  I quickly crossed my legs as I thought back to that night as he buried his head between my legs and ran his tongue up and down my slit, exploring my folds before sucking gently on my clit.

  It hadn’t taken me long to come. I’d finished on his face and had seen the visible evidence of if as he came back up to kiss me. I made him wash his face first, because I’d been repulsed at the thought of tasting myself on him.

  Now he was sat there reminding me of what he had done to his step-sister. He might have hesitated before agreeing to fuck me, but he’d obviously decided to go ahead and screw me anyway.

  “Don’t call me ‘sis,’ ” I said, through gritted teeth.

  Our living room was huge and yet right now it felt smaller than the dorm room I’d spent three years in and only just escaped. Blood rushed to my head as I struggled to focus. All the chairs in the room seemed to be squeezed together. Dad and Sheri were staring at me with concerned looks on their faces, but Caiden was just grinning.

  “But you are my sister now,” Caiden said. “Don’t worry I’m sure we’ll get to know each other and come to be best of friends.”

  I stood up on weak legs and the room came back into focus. Everyone was sat down calm and collected as they had been this entire time. I took a deep breath before speaking again. “I am not. Your fucking. Sister.”

  Dad screamed at me for my choice of words, but I heard Sheri tell him to lay off as I fled into the kitchen for a glass of water.

  I can’t be his sister, or stepsister, whatever it’s called. I can’t be, because if I’m his step-sister then that means he is my step-brother.

  I quickly drank a glass of water which helped with the dizziness, but not with the reality of what just happened in the living room. No glass of water would change the fact that I had lost my virginity to my step-brother.

  This is what happens when I break my own rules. The rules are there for a reason, but I’d gone and broken the most important rule of all. Rule number one. The golden rule. Never fuck virgins. If I had stuck to the rules none of this would have ever happened.

  Admittedly, the virgin rule was not in place to avoid potentially fucking my future step-sister. I didn’t fuck virgins because they got clingy. It was always the same. I could spot the virgins a mile off, but each one would insist they were different.

  “No, I won’t get like that, Caiden,” one girl had pleaded when I’d been about to walk home without her. What was her name again? Naomi? “I just want to lose my virginity to someone who knows what they’re doing. Show me a good time and you’ll never hear from me again.”

  Bullshit. I hadn’t been able to get rid of her the next morning and she kept conveniently showing up at the same places as me for weeks after. In the end, I invited her to my place and left the door unlocked to ensure she walked in on me balls-deep in some other girl I was screwing.

  She’d fled my apartment crying when I asked if she wanted to join in. The last thing I heard was some whimpering comment about how she loved me. I felt a touch bad a
bout that for a few moments, right up until I came all over the new girl’s tits.

  My ‘no-virgins’ rule had already been in place when Naomi added her notch to my bedpost, but my experience with her led me to bumping the rule up to number one. My golden rule. No virgins.

  If I’d stuck by the golden rule then the introduction to my new step-father would have been a lot less painful. He’d still be an uptight dick, but at least I wouldn’t have to look at him thinking about how I saw his daughter wince as she was penetrated for the first time.

  I blame my decision last week on the toxic combination of alcohol, surprise, and a serious case of blue balls. Vicky caught me after a few drinks and I’d been so taken aback by her blunt proposal that I found myself thinking about it—or rather, my cock did—before I could remember my golden rule.

  I’d also been a week without ejaculating which was almost a record for me. I hadn’t gone that long since I was about thirteen. A bad cold had kept me locked up in the penthouse so I couldn’t go out and get laid or hook up with any of my casual fuck buddies.

  The temptation of masturbation had raised its purple head a few times, but I’d resisted. I liked to save up as big a load as possible for the next lucky lady. Better on some hot blonde’s face than in a tissue. That was rule number two.

  Considering all those factors, I didn’t really have a choice but to fuck Vicky. Three times in one night. My cock made the decision immediately and it had taken just a few minutes for my brain to catch up. I took in the eighteen-year-old virgin in a buttoned up blouse and knee-length skirt standing in front of me; how could I resist?

  Vicky had been a good fuck for a virgin. Hell, who am I kidding, she’d been a good fuck period. I’d assumed one fuck would be enough and that she would be too sore to go again, but she took me by surprise by rounds two and three later on. That girl must have watched a fair bit of porn because she knew how to ride a guy and get into the rhythm of it.