Ketchikan or Bust (Tom's Adventures in Alaska)

by Matthew Green

  Tom smirks at Vic. He has a hard time imagining a woman could put up with Vic for a week let alone take care of him.

  “Does it need a special coil?” Tom asks.

  “A coil’s a fucking coil!” Vic exclaims. “As long as the wires are there, we’ll make the fucking thing work unless you want to spend more than you paid for the bike to buy a factory one.”

  Tom nods at Vic. “Is there a wrecking yard that deals in bikes here that might have some saddlebags?”

  “Have you seen my yard at the Flats? I think there might be a set out there that’ll fit, if not we’ll make em fit. You know how to weld don’t you?” Vic says with a laugh. “So what’d that old bastard soak you for his bike? I wouldn’t have paid more than five hundred bucks for it.”

  “He said I could have it for a hundred bucks,” Tom says.

  “You lying little bastard, he did not!” Vic says. “It’s worth a hell of a lot more than that and he knows it. Guys have been trying to buy that thing from him for years and he’s chased every one of them off. I’m surprised that he sold it to you, did you get a title?”

  “I’ll get a title. You let me worry about that,” Tom says.

  “Well, let’s go. If we’re going to get that frame, we’ll need to get there before the dozers crush it,” Vic says as he gets up and heads out the door.

  Tom watches the road fly by on the trip to the dump. He admires the colors of the autumn leaves that paint the mountains along the road along the way. He’s surprised that the trees are changing color this early in the year; their contrast with the evergreens is striking. He memorizes landmarks and the curves in the road on this trip. He doesn’t want to be caught off guard when he gets the motorcycle running. Vic skids onto the gravel at the entrance of the dump and heaves the truck over the rough path leading out into the dump grounds. He pulls up in the middle of the trash pile and then drives slowly while scanning the junk. He stops the truck, throws open the door and hops out before Tom can react. He pulls a motorcycle frame out of the pile and chucks it into the bed of the truck. Vic climbs back in the driver’s seat and resumes his slow journey along the pile. At the end he turns around and heads down the entire length again looking for treasure. Tom helps load a pile of coiled wire and bits of scrap before they head back to the highway. Vic waits for a truck to pass, pulls out onto the highway and heads for Bell’s Flats.

  “That was a pretty good haul,” Vic says. “Some pretty good scrap and I think there’s good coil in that bike frame.”

  “What do you do with the wire?” Tom asks.

  “We’ll burn the insulation off and sell the copper for scrap. Copper and aluminum prices are pretty good so it makes it worth the time. I don’t pick up any steel unless I want to build something.” Vic says.

  Vic pulls into the yard and skids to a stop. Tom gets out and starts sorting the new junk onto the piles of copper and aluminum already in the grass. Vic picks up a stick and heads out into the grass. Swack, swack, swack. Tom watches him swing the stick, pushing the grass aside as he does. Vic’s almost to the trees at the edge of the yard when he stops.

  “Come here boy! See if these will work for you,” Vic calls out.

  Tom reaches down, picks up a stick of his own and heads out into the grass where Vic is. He stands beside Vic and looks at the rear frame of a motorcycle that’s been torched off just in front of some hard sided saddlebags and a trunk.

  “I thought about using these for gear storage on the boat but never got around to doing anything with them. I’ll let you have them for a hundred bucks,” Vic says.

  “Where’d you get them?” Tom asks.

  “At the dump,” Vic replies.

  “So you want a hundred bucks for something that you picked up at the dump?” Tom asks.

  “I’ve got it, you want it! That makes it worth money, and it don’t matter where it came from. If you don’t want them, leave em where they are!”

  Tom shrugs because he realizes that Vic is right. The saddlebags and trunk are in pretty good shape and the price offered is more than fair. Tom kicks at the grass grown up through the frame and struggles to free it. Vic leans in and rocks it back and forth as Tom kicks the grass. Each of them grabs a side and they finally pull it free. They carry it back through the tall grass and set it down in front of the shop door. Tom fetches the motorcycle frame from the back of the truck and leans it against the building.

  “We’ll cut off what we need and weld it onto the frame of that bike of yours. It looks like they’ll fit without too much modification. Why don’t you pull that coil off the other frame in case we need it. Cut off as much of the wires attached to it as you can. Then let’s go get your bike and run it out here so you can get it fixed up. If I remember correctly, we’ll have to stop in Kodiak on the way back for a while to let it cool down so we’ll have lunch on the way back,” Vic says. “I need to catch up with Bible Don anyway. I need to give him his crew share.”

  Tom walks into the shop and follows the path that leads to the workbench. He digs through the tools on the bench and lying around the shop. Eventually he finds the wrench he needs to pull the coil out of the frame. He struggles for a minute to squeeze his hand into the middle of the frame and slips the wrench onto the nut on the coil bracket. He gives it a quick turn and spins the head on the outside of the frame with his free hand. He eases his hand out of the small space and lets the coil drop to the ground so that he can shake the cramp out of his fingers.

  “Damn son, I ain’t seen wrenching like that from someone your age in a long time. How’d you know what wrench you’d need? That jap stuff is always tough to work on because they use them metric nuts and bolts,” Vic says while smirking at Tom.

  “You just have to look at the head of the bolt, if it has numbers, it’s metric. Lines on the head mean it’s a standard size. By looking at this stud I know it’s a 10 mm nut, simple,” Tom replies.

  They climb in the truck and Tom drops the coil on the floor at his feet. Vic spins the truck around, throwing gravel around the yard. He spits gravel all of the way to the highway. Tom sits quiet and wonders if they’re going to recreate the accident that put the dents in the roof.

  “Who taught you how to fix things?” Vic asks. “You must have learned from someone.”

  “I grew up on a farm and had to fix stuff that broke or do without. We weren’t rich so I had to learn pretty early how to put bicycles back together after they broke. I needed a bike to get off the farm to go fishing and exploring so it was pretty important to me. After we moved from the farm to the acreage in Water Valley, I had to fix chainsaws and stuff otherwise we would have frozen to death in the winter without firewood. Then I bought my first car when I was fourteen. It always needed something done to it and I needed money, so I got a job at the local garage as a mechanics helper. The grumpy old guy that I worked for used to throw wrenches at me if I brought him the wrong tool, so I learned to be right more than wrong. I worked for him for a quite a while, until he threw a hammer at me one day when he was half tanked up. I walked out and never looked back. It was watching him butcher stuff and charge people for it that made me decide that I better learn to fix stuff because I sure don’t trust anyone else to do a good job,” Tom replies.

  “You ever put a clutch in a truck?” Vic asks. “I’ve got a truck in the yard that needs a clutch. If you think you can do it, I’ll give you them saddle bags.”

  “The saddle bags and fifty bucks and we’ll call it square,” Tom says.

  “Fuck the fifty bucks, I’ve been feeding you and I haven’t seen you pitch in for vittles,” Vic barks at Tom.

  “I’ve got the hundred bucks for the saddlebags! Do you feel like crawling around on the ground to do the clutch yourself?” Tom says dryly.

  “Fuck you!…..I guess you’ve got a deal. …..But don’t think you’ll be able to use that shit on me again!” Vic says as he gives Tom a smile of defeat.

  Tom sits watching the road pass by as they head to Bible Don’s. He�
�s surprised at how things seem to be working out.

  Chapter Five

  “It’s about time you got around to see me. I’ve been sitting here wondering if you’d spent my money!” Bible Don says as Vic and Tom enter his house. “I called the cannery and they said the salmon check was picked up yesterday!

  “I’ve been running around paying bills and tying up loose ends,” Vic says in his defense.

  “Fuck you Vic, I heard that you hit the bar before ten yesterday and painted the town ten shades of red before you were done!” Bible Don says loudly. “I might not have gone into town yesterday but people talk, especially when you’re drinking, flashing wads of cash and running your mouth off. If it hadn’t of been for young Tom here making sure that I got fed, I might’ve starved before you remembered you owe me money.”

  “Here’s your fucking share!” Vic shouts as he throws a bank envelope at Bible Don. “And HELLO to you too!”

  Bible Don shuffles through the envelope and smiles at Vic. “It never changes does it Vic? You want a beer?”

  “Yeah, bring a couple so that you don’t have to drag your crippled ass out of that chair so often to play host,” Vic says smiling at his old friend.

  “You want one Tom?” Bible Don asks.

  “Nah, I think I’m going to go out and change the oil in that motorcycle,” Tom says.

  “I did that this morning and took it out for a good spin to clear the varnish and carbon out of it. I think with a few miles it’s going to run pretty smooth. I called the tire shop and they’ve got a couple of skins ready to put on it. You aren’t going to go anywhere with my Swan with the tires that are on it!” Bible Don states.

  Tom nods and smiles at Bible Don.

  “Where the fuck are you going with Swan?” Vic asks. “Are you two timing the DQ girl?”

  Bible Don starts laughing. “Do you mean you told Vic that you’re running around with the DQ girl?” He asks before switching to look at Vic. “Tom hooked up with Swan before we went salmon fishing. He ran into her over at the college and they’ve been playing kissy face ever since. I’m pretty happy that she’s hooked up with someone that knows how to work hard and treat her like a lady,” Bible Don says to Vic. “You should see the way her eyes sparkle and the way she beams happiness when he’s around! I wish I could feel like that again!”

  “The little bastard’s been telling me that he’s been chasing that skirt from the DQ!” Vic says while swilling back his first can of beer. “I’d have been chasing her myself if I’d have known that he was sneaking up the hill for a smooch every day,” Vic says. “Why the fuck did you tell me that you were hooking up with that DQ girl?”

  “I didn’t,” Tom says, “you were the one who threw her into the conversation and I just never corrected you. Harley told me to let you think what you want and leave it alone so that’s what I did.”

  “You mean that fucking Harley threw me under the bus also? All of you fuckers knew, but me? Well,” Vic stutters, “….. I guess I at least have a chance at the DQ girl now! ….. You just better stay away from her you little fucker!” Vic laughs. “Go get us a few more beer and make yourself useful.”

  Tom looks in the fridge and sniffs at the jug of iced tea to see if it’s the booze kind before pouring himself a glass. He leans against the kitchen counter and listens to his two friends banter for a while before taking them the beer.

  “So you’re from Alberta?” Bible Don asks Tom.

  Tom nods.

  “I was through there one time on my motorcycle.” Bible Don starts,” We were bar hopping our way home from the lower forty eight and were on a long stretch of highway in southern Alberta when a thunderstorm blew up. Man, I ain’t ever seen a storm blow up that quick but was it ever cool! We’re cruising along at dusk and the lightning starts crashing around us and the rain was coming down in buckets. I put my head down below the windshield and skirted the dry ridges in the pavement to keep from hydroplaning. I’ve got to tell you, I thought I was going to die but I wasn’t about to try to hide from the storm because the lightning was just too beautiful! It was a real Come to Jesus moment for me! That’s beautiful country there, let me tell you.”

  “You’re full of shit Bible Don, you ain’t ever seen a thunder storm. Hell, I haven’t so I know you haven’t.” Vic states.

  “Honest to God, swear on the bible!” Bible Don says. “Tell him Tom, you come from thunderstorm country, don’t you!”

  Tom nods. “Yeah Vic, there are thunderstorms there every summer. They’re pretty cool. I think Bible Don must have been there, otherwise how would he know that they’re there?”

  Vic shakes his head. “Well, after the stories about the DQ girl, I know that both of you fuckers lie to me so I don’t think I can trust the pair of you together on this.”

  Tom leans against the counter again and listens to the two old fishermen tell stories and try to outdo each other. He’s amazed at how the stories get wilder and more farfetched with every beer they drink. He plays bartender for them into the afternoon and wonders how long they can keep up the drinking and bullshitting before their tempers begin to flare.

  “Tom, we’ve got to go!” Vic says with a slur in his voice. “You can drive. I think I’ve had one too many to be out on the road. Bible Don, you still got those ramps lying in the barn? We should load that motorcycle in the back of the pickup so that the boy can get it fixed and get the fuck out of my hair for a while.”

  “They’re inside the door of the barn hanging on the wall. Just a minute and I’ll give you a hand,” Bible Don says.

  Tom stumbles over the junk in the barn to get at the ramps. He pulls them from the wall and tosses them out the door. As he’s setting them up on the tailgate of the pickup, he wonders what kind of a comedy show is about to take place when he and the two drunk men try to load the bike. He hears the motorcycle start. He looks over and is surprised to see Bible Don sitting on the seat. Bible Don drops it into gear and lets out the clutch. The bike takes off and disappears around the house. Tom listens as the motorcycle goes through the gears as it disappears down the drive. It fades into the distance and then gets louder as it returns to the yard. About 20 feet from the back of the truck Bible Don shuts off the engine and coasts up the ramps into the back of the truck. He stops with the front wheel in the corner of the bed, tips it back onto the stand and walks down the ramps to stand beside Tom.

  “You only needed to bring out one ramp son, I could’ve made it. You look surprised at me riding it up there. Remember, I’ve been riding drunk most of my adult life! I couldn’t do it sober because I’d be too scared,” Bible Don says. “I’d come to town with you boys but I’d better stay here so I stay out of trouble.”

  Vic pours himself into the passenger seat and hollers at Tom to hurry up. Tom puts the ramps away and ties the bike securely in the back of the truck. He climbs into the truck and slowly pulls out of the driveway. The little truck sways and complains about the heavy load sitting in the back. Against Vic’s urges, Tom drives below the speed limit back to town. He cautiously drives through town because of the recklessness of the other drivers on the road.

  “Pull into the DQ and buy some takeout. Then you can drop me off at home!” Vic barks. You can use my truck tonight as long as you don’t leave any pecker tracks on the roof!”

  Tom pulls into the DQ parking lot and swings in the drive through lane. As he pulls up to the speaker, a head pokes out of the drive thru window. It’s the DQ girl; she waves. Tom leans out the window of the truck and places their order into the speaker. She repeats his order over the scratchy speaker and asks if there’s anything else.

  Vic leans over, “Yeah! I’d like a fur burger and a side of thighs!” He sits back in his seat and chuckles.

  “All right then, your order will be ready in about ten minutes. I’ll bring it out to you.” The DQ girl says through the speaker.

  Tom backs into a parking spot. Vic grumbles at having to wait and about how hungry he is. They both watch as
the DQ girl comes out of the door carrying their order, wearing street clothes. She walks over to the passenger side and motions for Vic to get out. He does and she climbs into the middle. She slides over close to Tom as Vic gets in.

  “Your timing is perfect! I just got off work. I hope you don’t mind but I have exactly what you ordered right here and I can’t wait to see you eat it!” The DQ girl says excitedly. “Now I assume you both ordered burgers but which one of you ordered the fur burger and thighs?” she asks, looking at Tom.

  “I did!” Vic says, “Tom, take us up to the house.”

  The DQ girl swings her head to look at Vic. “But…..I was hoping to swing in the other direction!” she exclaims.

  She looks back at Tom and grabs him by the inner thigh. Tom shrugs, pulls away from the DQ and heads toward Vic’s house.

  “This one over here was at the top of my list,” she says as she gives Tom’s thigh a squeeze, “but I guess if you’ve got beer, you’ll do,” she says as she turns to Vic.