Ketchikan or Bust (Tom's Adventures in Alaska)

by Matthew Green

  “If you’re done out there, get in here!” Swan calls from the shower. Steam billows from the bathroom as he enters.

  “Get in here, dirty boy, I want to scrub you!” Swan says seductively.

  “That’s sure a change of attitude from a few minutes ago,” Tom says as he gets into the shower.

  Swan pulls Tom in and closes the door. “It’s amazing how a shower can make things feel better. Come here and I’ll show you.”

  Tom lies on the bed naked and watches Swan get dressed. She pulls on a shirt and bends over to grab her jeans.

  “I thought you said that you should never waste a hard on!” Tom says as she tugs her jeans up.

  Oh, don’t worry! I’ve seen it and have no intention of wasting it!” Swan laughs, “It’ll still be there when I want it later. Get dressed and feed me!”

  “I think we should pick up some cheap helmets,” Tom states. “It’s the law here in Canada and after that last stretch I think they’ll be good for our mental health. Something with a face shield would be nice.”

  “Good idea, I was thinking in the shower that if I have to pick that many bugs out of my hair again, I’ll just cut it all off. It was gross! Some of them were still alive,” Swan says. “Get your ass off of that bed and get dressed. There’s a sports bar across the street. Let’s go see what’s on the grill!”

  “So why is it that you’re so hungry right after we have sex?” Tom asks.

  “Don’t know, don’t care!” Get after it boy, I need to eat!” Swan says sternly.

  Tom struggles to get off the bed to get dressed. He’s feeling pretty stiff from the day riding the Alcan. He pulls on his clothes slowly and sits on the edge of the bed to put on the shoes he’d bought in Anchorage. Swan impatiently taps her foot as if it’ll make him hurry. He finishes tying his shoe and puts out his hand for her to pull him up.

  “Are you feeling stiff?” Swan asks.

  “Yeah, it wasn’t too bad until the shower,” Tom says with a groan as he gets up.

  “So shower sex is too wild for you? I guess I’ll have to go easy on you next time and try not to hurt you!” Swan says as she helps him up.

  Tom smiles and decides not to reply. She opens the door and taps her toe again waiting for him. They walk arm in arm across the parking lot and stand at the edge of the street for an opening in the traffic. Tom holds open the door of the sports bar for Swan to enter and follows her in.

  “I’ll need to see some ID, miss,” the waitress says. “No minors allowed in here.”

  Swan looks at Tom annoyed, pulls her ID from her purse and gives it to the waitress.

  “Oh, I’m sorry. You look like you’re only sixteen. What’ll you have?”

  “I’d like a menu and a large chocolate milk,” Swan says indignantly.

  “Kokanee,” Tom says.

  “Be right back,” the waitress says cheerfully.

  “It’s beginning to piss me off that I keep getting carded but you don’t!” Swan whispers to Tom. “You’re the fucking baby here, why don’t they ask you for ID?”

  “I make sure that my wad of cash is always sticking out of my shirt pocket just enough for them to see. Minors are usually broke,” Tom says.

  “He’s right, Honey,” the waitress says as she sets their drinks down.

  Swan shakes her head as the waitress walks away. “I guess you have the look, hell, I thought you were older than you are. I want a steak!”

  Tom looks at the menu and decides that a steak sounds good. He waves the waitress over.

  “We’d like the top sirloin,” he says when she steps up.

  “I’d suggest the steak sandwich. It’s the most popular thing on the menu and on special tonight. I’d order while it’s not busy, we’re expecting the soccer teams soon. Tonight’s a game and it’ll get busy.”

  Tom and Swan both nod at the waitress and she walks away.

  “I think we’re going to have a short day tomorrow compared to today. If we’re lucky we’ll make it to Watson Lake but I think we should get some grub and plan on stopping someplace in between for the night. I’d like to find a nice quiet spot and do some fishing or something,” Tom says.

  “Just as long as I don’t have to pick bugs out of my hair again. If I feel as disgusting tomorrow as I did today, we’ll keep going until we find another hotel room,” Swan says. “I’m game for anything but I can only handle so much blood and guts before I freak out.”

  “It should be a little better tomorrow. Up ahead, the bog dries up a quite a bit up,” Tom says. “It’ll be forests and mountains from here to the coast.”

  The waitress brings their meal as the bar begins to fill up. “It looks like the soccer team won tonight. They’re pretty stoked. It should be a fun night, you should stick around!”

  The soccer teams slide tables together as more arrive. It looks like it’s a co-ed team because both men and women are wearing the same uniforms. The waitress is kept busy refilling beer pitchers and serving steak sandwiches. Tom and Swan eat their steaks and watch the teams laugh and celebrate. Swan orders a margarita and licks some of the salt from the rim before she takes a drink. She hesitates for a second and looks at Tom over the rim of the glass like she’s trying to draw his attention. He looks quickly and looks behind her again. She tries to draw his attention by licking her upper lip the way he likes. Hoots and hollers break through the noise and the bar goes quiet. Tom motions for her to turn around. She slowly turns to look where Tom pointed and starts to whistle and laugh with the crowd. One of the women from the soccer team is standing on a table in the middle of the bar swinging her shirt above her head. She kicks her shoes to the floor at the same time she pops the snap of her bra. The crowd cheers when she pulls it free and swings it above her the same as she did with her shirt. She looks at Tom and smiles. Tom looks away to focus on Swan.

  “It’d take me more than a couple of beers to get me up on a table to strip like that!” Swan says loud enough for Tom to hear. “Take it off!” she shouts as she turns back to watch the show. “Take it ALL off!”

  “Sara! Get your ass off that table and cover up! If you don’t stop stripping in here I’m going to have to ban you!”

  Sara quickly bends at the waist and yanks her soccer pants to her ankles. She stands up and kicks them toward Tom and Swan. She stands for a second wearing nothing but a G-string, kicks her leg above her head and spins in the middle of the table. A bouncer runs over with a table cloth and scoops her off the table, the crowd boos.

  “That’s enough! You’re out of here! If you want to get naked so bad, why don’t you go work at the strip club?” the bouncer says gruffly. “Grab her clothes and let’s get her dressed before the cops show up!”

  Swan turns to Tom. “Was she stripping for you? It looked like she performing us!”

  “Nah, I think it was for you,” Tom says with a loud laugh.

  “I hope so, she’s hot!” Swan laughs back at Tom. “She could do both of us, I wouldn’t mind!”

  Swan sips at her margarita. Tom leans over and licks the salt from her lip before sneaking a kiss. She bites his lip and slips her hand up his thigh.

  “Did that turn you on as much as my show on the boat?” she asks between kisses.

  He shakes his head, and replies with a long passionate kiss.

  “GET A ROOM!” a voice calls out.

  Swan pulls away from Tom for a second and shouts, “WE’VE GOT ONE, WE’RE JUST WAITING FOR SARA!”

  Laughter rolls through the crowd.

  Tom leans in, “You sure are a feisty little bitch when you’ve had half a drink!”

  “Really?” Swan says seductively. “Maybe I was serious!”

  Tom sits back and looks her over. She smirks at him and sips her drink.

  “So, did you enjoy that show as much as mine?” Swan asks.

  Tom feels like he’s been put on the spot. “Well, you said yourself that she’s hot.”

  “Yeah, I’ll give you that! Let’s finish our drinks and hea
d to the room. Maybe we’ll run into Sara on our way out.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  “I think you need to revise our plans. I’m not sure if you lied to me but it looks like we’ve got a lot farther to go than you said.” Swan says bluntly.

  “Oh, you looked at the trip planner map on the wall in there too?” Tom asks. “I looked at the mileage chart and almost shit. It’s not that far if we head south on Highway Thirty Seven but there’s nothing there for hundreds of miles. I don’t even know if there are any gas stations. If we take the Alcan Highway it’s another fifteen hundred miles from here to get to the ferry. I’m sorry my calculations were off, I made a quick measurement on the map in Tok and I guess I was looking at Highway Thirty Seven. We can turn around and head back if you want, it was only an afterthought to go to Ketchikan anyway.”

  Swan walks away for a minute and leans against the corner of the building. Tom looks in her direction and wonders what she’s thinking. She has a concerned look on her face that Tom hasn’t seen before. Swan pushes off of the wall and walks toward Tom. She hesitates for a second and turns away. Tom walks up, gently places his hands on her shoulders and begins to rub her neck.

  “What’re you thinking?” Tom asks with concern in his voice.

  Swan spins around to face him and places her hands on her hips. “I’m trying really hard to act like I’m pissed off at you but it’s not working. I can’t blame you for making an error like that but I thought we should be half way there and it turns out that we’re only a third the way,” Swan says half smiling, half straight faced. “I want to keep going but I don’t want you to miss the next fishing season either. That’s why Dad’s over in Cordova, he’s helping a friend get ready. We’ve been burning through a lot of cash and I’m sure that you’ll need to get out fishing to survive the winter!”

  “I’m doing ok on cash, I got paid for two trips when we got back from salmon fishing and I’ve been trying to conserve as much as possible. If we camp along the way down the Alcan, it’ll be about the same cost as I was expecting but I’m not too worried about a few hundred extra anyway. If I miss the next opening, I can get a job at the Ford dealership changing oil. I’ll tell you what, it’s your choice what we do. I won’t care either way as long as I get to spend my time with you!”

  “Honey,” Swan says as she wraps her arms around his neck and kisses him on the cheek, “I don’t have anything to get back to. I think my ass will regret it but if you’re still into going to Ketchikan, I’m up for the adventure.” She continues, “Tom, Honey, can I ask you a personal question?”

  “Sure,” Tom replies.

  “Who was better last night, Sara or me?” Swan asks seriously.

  Tom rolls his eyes, picks up her helmet and throws it at her. “Get your helmet on and let’s roll. We need to try to get to Fort Nelson today!”

  Tom smiles as they roll out of Whitehorse. Even though they’ve had a setback, he’s happy that Swan decided to continue on. Swan scoots forward and sticks her thumbs into the waistband of his jeans. She presses into him and they bump helmets for the first time. Tom swerves a bit and quickly adjusts the bike back into their lane. It takes them a few miles to get used to the new helmets. Nothing is as comfortable as riding with the wind in your hair and the bugs in your teeth, especially when you can rest your head on someone’s shoulder.

  The highway stretches before them and the miles tick by through the day. They only stop for gas and food and make good time to Watson Lake. It’s mid afternoon when they arrive in Watson Lake. After a quick discussion they decide to pick up some road grub and press on to Fort Nelson. Their intent is to go as far as they can and camp when they get too tired to continue. Swan takes a shift as evening approaches and she’s about an hour in when they approach a bridge. She brakes hard and stops in the middle of the bridge.

  “I think this is as far as I can go, I think I’m starting to get calluses on my ass. Now I know why women with fat asses don’t get sore on a bike. I feel like my tailbone is sticking through the leather of my pants,” Swan says, exasperated. “I might make it for another hundred miles but we’ll have to take two days off before I’ll be able to get on this bike again.”

  “I was just thinking the same thing. Let’s go back a few miles. There was a sign for a hot spring. Let’s check it out and see if there’s any place to camp there. At least we can soak for a while if the waters nice,” Tom says. “A hot bath would feel so good right now!”

  Swan swings the bike around and heads back the way they came. They head up the road a couple of miles and pull off the road into Liard Hot Springs Provincial Park. Swan navigates the gravel road into the treed park and follows the signs to the hot springs. A heavy sulfur odor permeates the humid air. The mosquitoes are thick and huge. She pulls off the road and they look over the area.

  “Well, I’m sure not staying here!” Swan says pointedly as she waves mosquitoes from her face. “These fuckers will suck all my blood and have me turned inside out by morning.”

  Tom reaches down into the water. “The water’s nice and warm. Let’s get away these blood suckers. We’ll get ready for a dip and make a mad dash for it!”

  “There’s a gas station just up the road, let’s go see if they have some skeeter juice,” Swan suggests. “You drive.”

  They hop on the bike and pull out of the park to try to find some bug repellant. Tom heads up the road to the lonely gas station and pulls into the lot. He fills the bike with gas while Swan heads in to look around. He takes the steps two at a time and opens the door. He finds Swan down one of the narrow aisles, kneeling down looking at stuff on a shelf.

  “Find anything?” he asks.

  Yeah, but they want fifteen dollars for a small can,” Swan says.

  “Are you folks looking for something?” the old man behind the counter asks.

  “Mosquito repellant,” Tom says.

  “Well, it’s right there where she’s looking. I think there’s a can left down there,” the old man replies.

  The price tag says fifteen dollars,” Swan says. “Is that right?”

  “Yep, that’s the price,” the old man says.

  “Why so much, it’s only worth a couple of bucks,” Swan says, more than a little disgusted.

  “It might be worth a couple of bucks in the city, but if it’s the only can for a couple of hundred miles, it’s worth whatever the sticker says. You folks are free to go into the city and get a cheaper can if you want,” the old man says.

  Tom walks around the end of the aisle and looks at t-shirts. He picks up a couple of XXL that say Liard Hot Springs. They are on sale for two dollars. He returns to Swan and holds them out to her.

  “I think if we put these on we can make it in without getting chewed up too bad,” Tom says to Swan. “They should protect us as good as repellant. Besides the repellant will wash off in the water and we’ll be clean fresh meat on the way out. If these get wrecked we’ll only be out a few bucks. I think he can stick that can up his ass!”

  She looks at the heavy t-shirts and nods. They go to the counter to pay for their gas and the shirts.

  “So you decided not to get the spray?” the old man asks.

  “Yeah, this will be all,” Tom replies as he flips a twenty on the counter.

  The old man rings everything up and hands Tom his change. “Good luck out there. I once watched four of them skeeters pick up a moose and fly off into the bush to eat it.”

  They leave the store and head back to the campground. Tom stops the bike away from the clouds of mosquitoes, but not too far from the hot springs.

  “Where do we change?” Swan asks.

  “Right here!” Tom replies as he looks her up and down. “What’s wrong? Are you afraid of getting naked in front of Mother Nature?”

  “What if someone drives in?” She asks.

  “I guess they’re going to get to see the best set of tits for a few hundred of miles,” Tom says while laughing.

  Swan thinks for a second, s
trips off her clothes and throws them on the bike seat. Tom follows her lead and they each pull on one of the new shirts at about the same time. Swan runs across the gravel toward the hot springs and slows to walk across the planks that form a path to the pool. Tom follows and swats away the mosquitoes that she’s stirred up. They rush along the path and practically dive into the water to get away from the flying beasts. They sit in the warm sulfur water and instantly feel the aches and pains fade.

  “This feels beautiful! I’ve never had a bath that did this to me,” Swan says. “I feel more relaxed than I think I ever have!”

  Tom splashes her and tries to dunk her under the water. She screams. They’re startled when a moose, spooked by her scream, crashes through the trees a few feet away. It stops after a few gangly steps and starts to pull plants from the water to eat. They stay quiet to watch the moose wander through the pool and graze the plentiful vegetation.