Zombie Rules (Book 3): ZFINITY

by David Achord

  People: late in January, we had some new arrivals. They are some of the same people we encountered back when we raided the police evidence building. There are ten of them, six men and four women. One of those women is Julie’s mother. Julie told me all about her, and it sounds like she is a total bitch. They were having a very hard time surviving on their own and decided to move closer to us. I think we should have made them leave, but everyone else agreed to let them live nearby. They ended up moving into a house on the corner of Franklin Pike and Concord road. It’s about six or seven miles from our house, but not far enough away for my comfort. We only had limited contact with them before the big snowstorm hit. So, for most of the month, we’ve only been communicating with Mac and the rest of them through the radio. They seem to be doing okay.

  Mac said there have been no new arrivals, which is not surprising. I don’t think anybody can travel on the roads until it starts to warm up and everything thaws out.

  We’ve been doing okay, mostly. Little Frederick was sick for a few days with the colic or something, but he’s better now and he’s learning how to crawl. I know childhood illnesses are a major source of worry for everyone.

  Julie is pregnant again. She thinks she conceived the first of January. Nobody else is pregnant that I know of, but not for lack of Terry and Rowdy trying their best to sow their wild oats.

  Zombies: I’ve not seen any around, probably due to the freezing weather. However, Zach went out skiing one day and said he saw a few that were frozen. He didn’t say anything else about them, but he immediately went to the barn and spent a few minutes sharpening his machete. That is his preferred method of killing them so as to save ammo. Nobody else cares to get that close to them. We’ve had a lot of discussions about them lately. Zach is convinced the ones who are still alive are going to become predators that will be able to think and stalk their prey. It’s a scary thought and it reaffirms our belief that we need to kill as many as possible.

  Hopefully, it’s going to warm up soon. I’m tired of the cold and the snow – Andie.

  Chapter 23 – Birthday Girl

  I sat on the edge of the bed, holding Frederick, watching Julie sleep. It was still dark in the room, a little after five in the morning, so I could only see the outline of her form. I didn’t need anything else though. I had memorized every line, curve, and freckle long ago. She was breathing deeply, as was Frederick. It was peaceful.

  I don’t know how long I sat there, watching her. She eventually turned in her sleep and reached out to where I would have been lying beside her. When her hand didn’t find me, she stirred and wakened.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked when she saw me.

  “Not a thing, sweetheart.”

  “Nothing?” she asked again, sitting up.

  “Our son insisted on seeing his beautiful mommy on her birthday,” I said quietly. She rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and scooted over beside us.

  “I hope March isn’t going to be as cold as February was,” she said with a yawn. I put my arm around her and gently caressed her. I think she would have fallen back asleep, but Frederick, who was awake now, had other ideas and started in with loud baby talk.

  “Somebody’s hungry,” she said.

  “I’ll take care of it. You go back to sleep if you want to,” I left her with a kiss on the forehead. Twenty minutes later, I had Frederick fed and then burped him while I waited for the inevitable diaper change. I was certainly going to be glad when he was potty trained. Andie joined me while I was letting Curly outside.

  “You’re up early,” I said.

  “Terry and I are going to check on the beehives and wanted to get an early start.”

  I looked at her with a grin. “Oh, yeah? Sounds like a fun date.”

  She looked away and I thought I detected her blushing. “It’s not like that. We’re just friends.”

  I nodded knowingly and looked at the morning sky. “Y’all should have a good day for it. I’m not feeling any dampness in the air. It’s going to be a beautiful March day I think.”

  “What are you going to do today?” she asked.

  “Whatever Julie wants to do,” I replied, and then whispered. “I’m going to talk her into going to Bo’s and we’ll spring her present on her.”

  Andie smiled. “She’s going to shit her pants.”

  I chuckled at her crassness, as we watched as a pair of headlights came into view. We immediately recognized Mac’s truck. Since everything had thawed out, she loved joining us for breakfast and little Frederick was fascinated by her. I stood and handed him off to Andie. “I’ll get some coffee ready.”

  “This pretty girl is Isis,” Bo said, stroking the face of a dark brown quarter horse. She was currently in a stall with a blanket on her. She nickered at Bo and playfully nipped at his arm. “She’s fully trained, but she’s not as big as these Thoroughbreds around here and they tend to pick on her. So, Zach and I believe she needs a new home.”

  “Happy birthday,” I said with a grin. “Oh, by the way, she’s pregnant too.”

  Julie looked at us with wide eyes. “She’s beautiful. Thank you,” she grabbed me in a hug, and then hugged Bo as well, which embarrassed him.

  Penny walked out from a nearby stall. “Oh good, one less horse I have to clean up after.”

  Bo shrugged when we looked at him. “She wants to ride my horses, she’s gotta earn her keep.”

  “So, what do I do with all of these horse turds?” Penny asked, pointing to a muck pile in the corner of the barn.

  I grunted and looked around until I spotted a wheel barrow. “If you guys aren’t going to put it to use, I certainly will,” I moved the wheelbarrow over to the muck pile and grabbed a shovel.

  Penny watched me curiously as I began shoveling. “What in the world are you going to use horse shit for?” she finally asked.

  “I’m going to add them to the compost pile,” I paused for a second. “Say, Penny, have you guys tilled up any garden plots yet?”

  “No, should we?” she asked and looked questioningly at Bo. He cleared his throat.

  “I’ve got a couple of plots laid out, but Chet and his boys haven’t done much of anything.”

  I nodded thoughtfully. Bo must have read my thoughts.

  “They’re too smart for their own good, Zach,” he said. “I’ve tried giving them advice, but they ignore me. I avoid them now because all they do is piss and moan.”

  I listened to him as I finished shoveling and closed the tailgate. “Are you coming to the dinner?” I asked. He nodded. “Penny and I are going to head over in a couple of hours. I’ll carry Isis to your barn and get her settled in if you’d like.”

  “That’d be most appreciated. Maybe we’ll go pay Penny’s buddies a visit and see how they’re doing,”

  “Can I ride with you guys?” Penny asked and looked at Bo. “I want to get a change of clothes.”

  I shrugged and nodded.

  “You two are certainly a curious couple,” Julie commented as we exited the gate to the horse farm. I grinned and glanced at Penny in the rearview mirror. Her mouth had dropped open.

  “Is it obvious?” Penny asked.

  Julie responded with a lighthearted laugh. “Bo has trimmed his beard and he was wearing a clean pair of overalls. I don’t think he did it to impress the horses.”

  “Bo’s a good man,” she responded after a moment. “He’s stubborn as hell, but he’s okay. He said he’s not quite ready for me to move in with him though.”

  “I assumed you were hooked up with someone from your group,” I commented.

  Penny shook her head. “I was with a dude who called himself Mojo, but he was killed when the zombies attacked us,” she responded. “I’ve been solo since then.”

  Julie looked back over her shoulder at Penny. “We’ve all lost loved ones, I’m sorry.”

  Penny shook her head. “Oh, no, it wasn’t like that. I didn’t love him.”

  I frowned and looked in the mirror again. Penny shrugged
.

  “When we first met, I was all alone and starving. Everyone I knew was either dead or had turned into one of those things. We met by chance. He offered me food in exchange for sex,” she grimaced. “Mojo was okay, but I didn’t love him. I mean, he protected me and was kind toward me, but good Lord, the man was gross. He didn’t bathe very often, and he didn’t seem to care too much for the use of toilet paper, if you know what I mean,” she saw Julie wrinkle her nose and snorted.

  “I know, it sounds bad, but I was alone, completely alone, and I literally had not eaten in three days when he found me. I was starving and scared to death. When you get to that point, you’ll take whatever is offered.”

  “I was at that point once. Zach was my knight in shining armor, and, I might add, he is very skilled in the proper use of toilet paper.”

  Penny burst out laughing. “Well then, I’d say he’s a keeper.”

  I had no desire to discuss my personal hygiene so I changed the subject. “So, which one is Janet sleeping with?” I asked.

  Penny shook her head again. “She tried to get together with Chet, but he turned her down and I don’t think she’s interested in Johnny, he’s the only other one still single.”

  Interesting, I thought, Chet was not interested in Janet. Maybe I underestimated him. We parked in front of the house and I looked around. Other than a couple of rain barrels attached to some downspouts, neither Julie nor I saw any other evidence of improvement. Penny must have seen our shared look of disdain.

  “You two don’t care for us too much, I’m thinking,” she stated.

  Before I could answer, we were interrupted by Chet and another man walking out of the front door.

  We got out and everyone exchanged handshakes, which seemed to be a good gesture. That is, until Chet’s buddy tried to assert his male dominance by gripping my hand tightly. It didn’t work. My hands were hardened with layers of callouses, and my strength was equal to, or greater than his. I smiled politely and increased the pressure of my grip. His cocky smirk became a strained grimace before I let go.

  “Well, I don’t believe you two have come to visit since we’ve moved in,” Chet mentioned casually.

  “You’re right, we haven’t. It’s been a long cold February and we’ve mostly stayed home. How’ve you guys been?” I asked.

  “What the hell is that smell?” the other man interrupted. Apparently, failing the attempt to intimidate me with an overpowering handshake, he was now going to resort to a passive aggressive form of incivility. He was standing to the left of Chet, giving me the stink eye, waiting for me to respond. I looked at him studiously. He was in the same age range as Chet, late twenties or early thirties, lean, rawboned, maybe six feet tall.

  “Are you referring to the horse manure I have loaded in the back of the truck?” I asked.

  He snorted. “If you say so.”

  “Your name is Johnny, right?” I asked. He nodded indifferently. “I’m not sure what you’re trying to imply. Maybe you’re saying it isn’t the truck load of horse shit that smells so bad. Maybe you’re saying I’m the one who stinks, or maybe, you’re saying my wife stinks. What are you saying, Johnny?”

  He answered with a silent, unfriendly stare. I returned his stare a moment before redirecting my attention to Chet. “Chet, we’re having a pot luck supper at the school and came by to invite you guys” I pointed at Johnny. “Based on his behavior, maybe it’s a bad idea for y’all to come. It’s good to see you,” I turned to Julie. “Let’s get going.”

  We turned to go but Chet held a hand up.

  “Hold on guys. Johnny was just clowning, right, Johnny?” Chet turned and glared at Johnny.

  “Yeah, I was just clowning. Don’t mind me,” he responded without feeling. I stared at him a moment to see if he was going to say anything else, or do something stupid. He returned my stare a moment, and then made like there was something interesting in the distance to gaze at. I held my temper in check and tried to be diplomatic. After all, it was Julie’s birthday.

  “Anyway, like I was saying, we’re all getting together at the school. It starts at sixteen hundred hours. Everyone is expected to bring some food to the table. There’s plenty of room if you want to spend the night, but you’ll need to bring your own sleeping bags.”

  “It sounds really good,” Chet said, and cast a warning glance at Johnny. “We don’t have a lot of food to offer though. We’ve been clearing out houses in the area, but we’re running low on ammo and fuel. Plus, a lot of the canned foods we’ve found are swollen out of proportion. I don’t think they’re good anymore.”

  I nodded. “Thermophiles.”

  Everyone looked at me as if I were speaking a foreign language. I spelled it out for them.

  “Long explanation short, prolonged exposure to heat, like last summer, will cause the microorganisms inside the cans to grow and ruin the food. If the cans are swollen, the contents inside are no longer edible, but don’t throw them away. You can give them all to Bo and he can feed his pigs with them. I’m sure he’d trade a smoked ham for anything you have.”

  They looked at me as if they had already discarded everything they thought had no value. I didn’t bother asking.

  “Okay, back to the dinner invite. Bring what you can. It’s mostly going to be an informal event, but we’re also going to discuss our future and how we can possibly do some projects together,” I looked at the two men. “I’ll be honest, Chet, I look around and see at least a dozen things you guys can be doing to improve your situation. If y’all are up to listening, we can discuss it in detail over dinner.”

  “Can I say something here?” Johnny asked in a tone which suggested he was trying to suppress an irritation. I shrugged a shoulder.

  “Certainly.”

  “You’re what? Eighteen, nineteen?” he asked.

  “Eighteen, why do you ask?”

  He glanced at Chet momentarily and then gestured at me. “My point is that you’re a kid. What could you possibly teach us?”

  Chet glared at him, but I waved a tolerant hand. “Why don’t y’all come to the school, take a look around at the improvements we’ve made, talk to everyone, and listen to what we have to say. Maybe you’ll change your mind.”

  I started to say more, but was interrupted by Penny emerging from the house. She was accompanied by Julie’s mother.

  Julie leaned in close. “I bet she doesn’t even realize what day it is,” she whispered.

  “Hi, kids,” Janet said as she walked up.

  “Hello, mother,” Julie replied. I watched her, but didn’t return her greeting. There was a few seconds of awkward silence.

  “Chet, we must be getting back,” I finally said. “We have a few chores to do before dinner. I hope you guys join us.”

  “I think we’d like that, Zach,” he said. Johnny nodded slightly in agreement. Janet suddenly spoke up.

  “Can I come visit my grandson?” she asked, almost sheepishly. I looked at Julie. She stared back at me silently, but I knew her well enough.

  “Yeah, sure,” I replied, “hop in the truck.”

  Janet looked at me suspiciously a moment to see if I was tricking her. When she realized I was serious, she hurriedly got in.

  I backed the truck up to our compost pile and the women immediately headed to the barn, leaving me to do the shoveling. I could overhear most of their conversation and I wondered if Julie was going to allow Janet to grill her with prying questions.

  “I didn’t know you could ride horses,” Janet said.

  “Fred taught me,” Julie replied as she softly brushed Isis. Janet scoffed.

  “Oh, the cowboy who thinks he’s living in the Wild West. I should have known. What in the world made you want to learn to ride horses anyway?”

  “Because I like horses, they’re beautiful creatures, like Isis. She’s beautiful.”

  Isis must have known she was being talked about, she nickered softly.

  “She’s Julie’s birthday present,” Penny added.r />
  Julie watched her mother out of the corner of her eye. It took a moment before her eyes widened in realization.

  “Oh, my God, it’s your birthday!” Janet exclaimed, as if it was somebody else’s fault she had forgotten it. Julie ignored her melodrama.

  Fred and the boys drove up as I shoveled the last of the manure out of the truck. I leaned against the shovel and waited on them.

  “Did you get that from Bo?” he asked, nodding toward the manure.

  “Yeah, he has plenty.”

  “It’ll certainly be tasty for all of those worms the boys dumped in there,” he commented.

  “Yeah, I think so. I’m going to experiment a little with it. I have an organic gardening book somewhere that I need to read.”

  His next comment was a low whisper. “Is that who I think it is inside the barn?”

  I nodded. “Yep,” I replied in the same low whisper. “It was probably a mistake, but since it’s Julie’s birthday, I invited her to join us. We’ll dump her after the dinner. By the way, I invited Chet and his group to join us.”

  Fred grimaced slightly.

  “I know,” I said, replying to his unspoken opinion, “but if they’re going to continue living here, we need to get them on board with us. Besides, Penny just told us Janet tried to hit on Chet, and he turned her down, so maybe there’s hope for him.”

  I tried not to grin when I said it and then regrettably realized I was talking about Tommy’s mother right in front of him. If it bothered him, he didn’t show it. We looked at each other a moment and then the four of us walked in the barn. The women turned their attention on us when we walked through the barn door and smiled. Well, except for Janet. She jogged up and embraced Tommy in a hug. He looked uncomfortable and shrugged out of her grasp.

  “How do you like your birthday present?” Fred asked.

  “You were in on it too?” Julie asked. Fred smiled slightly and nodded.