Questing Heart: Fighting Heart Erotic Bad Boy Romance Series Book 2

by Hamilton, Nicole

  Seven hours later, I was in York. It was colder than London by degrees but it was truly pretty, atmospheric too and the air was noticeably cleaner. I had the address for the Festival in York. I’d Googled it and saw that today’s venue was a pub near the town’s central library. It was a multi- venue event, with a pub called The Great Stag housing poetry readings and later readings from new authors. Cantor’s note suggested Cody would be on this billing. The readings started at 8pm. The poets performed from 7pm. I had never really been a literary girl when I lived at home, but in the short time since I joined Smiths College I’d had a relationship with rock and roll writer Brandon Lynes, and now here I was pursuing my newly published friend, Cody Barnes. I couldn’t yet fathom it, but I told myself the rules - Cody was my friend, that was all, and I needed to see him badly. I hadn’t even booked into a hotel in York as yet, and the day was almost done, the poetry readings all but finished. The Great Stag pub was well done, with lots of space between the sofas and the tables. I sat back on an old brown leather Chesterfield, reading the festival brochure and avoiding a few inquisitive gazes from guys who were clearly wondering whether I was alone. I didn’t give them any encouragement. I drank and kept my eyes down. I heard Cody’s voice first, warm and familiar and full of mirth, bringing light to my mood. I smiled without looking then I turned around to face the door. Cody didn’t see me, so he didn’t see my smile drop off a cliff. Cody held the door open for a glamorous looking lady with long flowing brown hair and plenty of style. The woman was in her mid-thirties maybe, and was wearing a chic little suit. She looked sexy and cool, while here I was in yesterday’s clothes fresh from getting crumpled and tired on an inter-city train. Suddenly, I was unsure of myself. I watched them laughing and sharing a joke, oblivious of me and everyone else. Right then, I wondered why I had even shown up.

  Six

  I watched Cody with this beautiful professional lady and felt a lump rising in my throat. I willed them not to see me. They didn’t. As Cody led the way he chatted and laughed with her. They took a seat over in the far right hand corner of the big open bar space. It was a table for two. I could see them in profile, and I shifted a little on my Chesterfield so that a painted column would obscure me from their sight, but I could still see them. Cody had a folder with him, and opened it, splaying the contents across the table so that the lady could lay a hand on the papers and read. She was quiet for a time, then she looked up and spoke with enthusiasm.

  “That’s powerful stuff,” I heard her say. As she passed the papers back to Cody I saw her lay a slender hand on the back of his, just for a moment. Cody didn’t fight it. I guessed a lot had happened since I last saw him. He’d won some kind of literary competition and was in line to get published, and he’d met a mystery brunette who was older than him, but way attractive and clearly liked him a lot. What the hell was I doing here? I was due more pain and shame... Screw it. I decided to stay out of sight and wallow for a while. The truth of the matter was that I wanted badly to be wrong about their relationship – I wanted some sign that this classy woman and Cody were not an item, despite all the evidence to the contrary. I stayed in my seat and sipped on my drink, and as the crowds of students and older-aged book fans began to slowly congregate around me, I became even more invisible to Cody, and yet more obvious to the strange guys entering The Great Stag. I guessed I would have to leave soon, or else some guy was going to crack on to me at the worst possible time. If that happened I would either make a horrible mistake on the rebound, or I would torch the guy down to the ground. Nobody else deserved my unfettered temper yet.

  I saw Cody was getting nervous, keyed up for his reading. The sexy woman drew round the table in some kind of gesture to help Cody prepare, but I saw through all that. A girl knows how another girl plays this game. She was moving in for the kill and I could only watch. They read the papers and laughed. She put an arm across his shoulder and squeezed him and left her arm lingering there way too long. Then Cody stood up with their empty glasses and gestured to the bar.

  “But just one more, or I am going to be a write-off…” said Cody above the growing din of chatter.

  He threaded through the crowd, and I tried to sink deeper into the Chesterfield. The guy next to me looked over with a mix of curiosity and predator about him. Sooner or later he was going to ask me if I wanted a drink. I did, but not from him.

  As Cody segued between the tables, his head became angled my way. He looked up from his feet and my face was directly in his line of sight. His eyes found mine. His mouth opened into a capital O, and then he grinned and started laughing. He actually looked happy to see me. My heart did a triple somersault as he approached and I felt the ambitions of the guy beside me crawl under a rock.

  “Ashley! What the hell are you doing here?!” he said.

  I stood up. “Well, it’s good to see you, too, Cody.”

  “Wow! That’s what I meant, of course. It is so good. Come here.” He pulled me to his chest and wrapped his arms around my back. I had been cool and didn’t even know it until he touched me, but in his arms I felt warm and safe, and I didn’t want to let him go… but eventually we parted and I looked up into his eyes. Why the hell hadn’t I seen how handsome he was before? He had a finely chiselled face, sculpted even, with freckles on his cheeks, and his wild sparkling eyes were green and brown, though much more brown than mine. Our eyes locked onto each other, but our gaze went much deeper than the surface. It was as if we were seeking meaning in each other… I know that sounds crazy, but it’s hard to explain. He was dressed in a crisp white shirt with no tie, and the collar buttoned to the top. His frame was slender but masculine, with muscle tone in all the right places to get noticed. He looked great. Yes, Cody Barnes looked like s star in waiting.

  “I got some of your messages, Ash. I’m sorry… but I knew you were still tied up with Brandon. I couldn’t bear the thought of it. I wanted you to have a clean break from him, but if you didn’t want that, well… I needed to get my head straight…”

  I was a little hurt, but I knew what he was saying was right. I had wanted his excuse to be that his phone was broken or there was no signal in Yorkshire or something… but he had ignored my calls because he couldn’t deal with my Brandon situation. I swallowed that and gave him a smile to hide my feelings.

  “It’s okay, Cody. You were right, I should have ended it sooner.”

  “Maybe I should have answered your calls, Ash. I was being selfish, looking after my own feelings first. I’m sorry.”

  “Hey. That’s okay, and I’m here now, right.”

  “Right. So…” there was a glimmer of excitement in his eyes and a change in his voice. “Are you still with Brandon?”

  “I’m here, Cody.” I saw Cody wanted more than that. “He got worse, Cody, so I left him for good this morning.”

  “You mean that?”

  “Yes, Cody. I mean every word of it and he knows that too. He got me evicted from my flat share, Brandon. He started stealing every bit of my freedom.”

  “I saw what he was doing. But you got out, good for you. Tonight we will celebrate… after my reading. But… jeez… I was supposed to go out with Joanna after the reading.”

  “Joanna? That’s a nice name. She’s a very pretty lady.”

  Cody made a tilting maybe gesture with his head.

  “No, Cody, that woman is pretty. You’ve got good taste in the company you choose,” I said.

  “Ashley, that’s Joanna Laws of the JLA Agency. Joanna Laws is my agent. You’re right, she’s a pretty lady and she has my future in her hands, so this is just a business relationship. She takes her ten per cent – when we get that far – and then we’re quits.”

  “Are you sure? You guys looked pretty close to me,” I couldn’t help saying it. I needed to know.

  “Look at me. I’m sure. She’s my agent Ash, and I was supposed to go to dinner with her tonight after the reading, but maybe I can get you into dinner with us…”

  “No, Cody. T
hat’s a bad idea. Business is business. I’ll stay and watch your reading. We can hook up tomorrow.” Hook up. I hoped so.

  “I’ll miss you now I know you’re here.”

  “Good. I’ll miss you too.”

  I took a moment to seal what we had just said by leaning against him, wrapping my arms around his body in a quick squeeze and I gave him a quick sweet little kiss on his cheek. If he really was going to miss me the way he said, my kiss would give him something to think about.

  I chose not to say hello to Joanna Laws, Cody’s new agent. For one, I resented her obvious overtures towards Cody, and secondly, I had the feeling that seeing her up close would only make me feel worse. Even from where I was sitting, I could tell she looked pretty good for a woman in her thirties. Flawless, even. So I hung back on my Chesterfield, but I was more than happy now. Cody had apologised for the lack of contact and even had me understanding why he might ignore me like that. Beyond that, I felt something good in his eyes when we shared that look.

  When he finally took the stage and started speaking, I heard him read the same piece he had read in the Vegetarian café back near our college. What he read was the same but different. The words had been augmented with an awesome passion in Cody’s voice. He seemed a different person than before. He had gravitas and poise. Suddenly I saw this man could be a writer in the way that Brandon had failed to be. I was so proud when he received a long ovation from the audience. My Cody.

  But I was counting my chickens. I waved at Cody after he’d finished and gave him a double thumbs up. He smiled and waved back, and then I packed up and decided to find a room before the town ran out of them. But before I shifted altogether I looked back through the window of The Great Stag. There amidst the drinkers and the festival folk Cody was talking excitedly to his agent. She threw her arms around him and held him under the excuse of celebration. But I saw where she wanted to take this. I hoped Cody stayed true to what could be between us. But in a sense, I knew it wasn’t my right to determine his future or where his love settled. Back outside the Union bar he had given me the bare facts, and I had made my choice. Through fear of losing everything I’d worked for I had stayed with Brandon – even when I knew it wasn’t good for me… and in the meantime Cody had moved on and a new woman had noticed him. If I lost Cody tonight I would only have myself to blame. I turned away from the window before I could see something I didn’t want to. Even if my hotel was the most comfortable in York, there was no way I would sleep well tonight. I hoped tomorrow I would end up as Cody’s lover… but there was a chance I would end up just a friend. And I would have to accept it either way.

  Seven

  The day before Ashley arrived in Yorkshire things had been so very different. Cody had realised Joanna Laws was keen on him and he knew it within a day of arriving in Yorkshire. They’d spoken by phone and swapped emails before the trip and he just knew she was going to be sexy just from her telephone voice. Her voice was soft but forceful and there was humour and play thrown into the mix. She was a businesswoman who saw Cody as a sound investment for her agency and her time. When someone showed belief in Cody’s writing – the thing he had put his whole time and self into – Cody couldn’t help but automatically like them. He liked her before he even met her, and then when he saw her he struggled to stop his eyes revealing the awe he felt. Throughout the trip they had talked business about a three book publishing deal and anthology of short stories with a major publisher. Joanna had the contacts and she said Cody had the talent. From this point on Cody began to pick up subtle and sweet vibes, yet still thought some of it was just in his head. Ashley’s inability to move on from the jerk of the year – Brandon Lynes - had left Cody hurt and confused. For all the texts she had sent him Cody reckoned if Ashley was still with Brandon by now then she was destined to never leave him. The idea that Ashley’s potential and beauty ruined and abused by such an idiot burned him up. Whenever he thought about it Cody winced. So now he was in Yorkshire he put it away deep inside and decided only to look at what was before him. And what he saw was good. Joanna Laws was hot, but not in the glossy magazine, bikini and thong type of way. No. This woman was classy. Cody liked the attention he got from her, revelling in the warmth of her gaze. It felt good and mostly took his mind off Ashley. Those feel good vibes had been simmering all week, and on the night before Ashley arrived in town they boiled over...

  They were on the rural leg of the Yorkshire festival. Joanna had said this part was mostly for a social media campaign to build Cody’s profile after winning the new writer award. They arrived at a small country pub in the afternoon. There were multi-coloured festival banners everywhere and some press people around, but to Cody it looked more like a political hustings than a reading venue. He took a drink with Joanna while they waited for his turn to read. So far she’d paid for all the food and drinks on their tour along with all their accommodation. As they supped their drinks in the country pub, with the day heading towards evening, Joanna shared her plans for the rest of their day. She wore another of her chic expensive suits, her immaculately combed brown hair cascading down past her shoulders. There were hints of her years in the fine lines on her brow, but aside from the suit and those fine lines, Joanna could have been aged anywhere between twenty-two and thirty-six. Cody enjoyed that unknown. As he looked at her Cody wondered what it would feel like to go to bed with an older woman. What that would be like? When she looked at him – glossy eyes smiling, her lashes fluttering as she laughed – he went into a spin. Joanna Laws was far too easy company to be ignored.

  “I know this little crowd will love you, Cody. The smart literary guy from the big city, come to inspire them with your prose full of passion and desire.”

  “You think? I thought these guys would much rather drink an ale and eat a pie in peace round here.”

  “Not these people. Think of this pub as a stage set. The publishers have bussed in a lot of people and the literature fans, the real book fans, have driven in themselves. It may look very parochial but all these people matter. And as my hottest property, I think you will go down very well.”

  “Hot property? Moi?”

  “Absolutely, Cody. I’m staking a lot on you. But it’s your passion which will sell your work the most. Tell me… do you still love that girl?”

  “What?” Cody looked up from his drink.

  “The girl in the book. It’s obvious your feelings were very strong for this girl. It must have been some affair…”

  Joanna was being personal but somehow Cody didn’t mind. In fact, it felt good to discuss it.

  “Love?! I’m not sure it ever even got that far. I liked the girl a lot. I saw her potential and I wanted to help her. But she just couldn’t help herself, she sold herself short for a bad guy with a very big rep.” Cody didn’t mention his name in case there were consequences.

  Joanna Laws eyes glimmered. “So it didn’t work out between you.”

  “I guess not.”

  “Shame,” said Joanna. But the way she said it had undertones. Cody picked them up and felt a heat stirring within.

  They talked about his book some more and then Joanna said, “I’ve decided that we shouldn’t go back to York tonight. We’ll stay out here. This is a lovely place, don’t you think?”

  She made a flourishing gesture of the rustic pub. It was a nice place, and Cody didn’t have to pay. He didn’t object.

  “Sure… sure, that’s fine,” he said. She left Cody at the table with a smile and went to arrange their stay. It wasn’t until after Cody’s reading that the arrangements became much clearer.

  ***

  “Outstanding performance, yet again,” she said as Cody climbed down from the stage to a burst of applause. Joanna put a tankard of ale in his hand and led him to a quiet table at the side of the bar. The Q & As were all done. Cody had shaken hands with the readers and signed a few festival brochures. Work was finished for the evening.

  “Now, it’s time for my little star to relax,” said Jo
anna.

  They drank ale and then ate a special pub dinner of steak and kidney pie. At half past nine when dinner had long finished, Joanna’s face changed with intent. She leaned forward across the table. Her hair fell by her face. “It’s time we retired for the night. You’ve got a busy schedule tomorrow.”

  “You’re sure you don’t want another drink, Joanna?” Cody asked.

  “Of course I do. But let’s share a drink upstairs before we go to sleep. If we stay down here we’ll end up drinking all night.”

  “Sure…” said Cody. His eyes widened at the possibilities and his throat got a tight with excitement. Surely, this wasn’t going to happen… was it? They stood up and he let Joanna lead the way. His heart was pounding.

  “This is our room,” she said. “I hope you don’t mind us sharing, but my business budget can only stretch so far…” she laughed, and gratefully Cody heard the nerves in her voice. She was taking a risk, and they both knew it. Cody reassured her immediately.

  “No, that’s fine. I can take the sofa. A lady deserves a good bed to sleep in.”

  “A lady,” said Joanna, grinning. “That’s me is it? We can work out the sleeping arrangements after we have a drink,” she said. Relaxed again Joanna took control. She was demure and confident and approached Cody with a feminine swagger as she poured a drink from the bottle she brought up from the bar.

  Joanna sat down close by Cody. For the first time, she was intimately close. Her hip pressed firmly against Cody as they chatted. He felt it press more firmly over time. Her presence was intimate and suggestive. Cody’s heart was racing faster and he smiled at her over the noise of his feelings.

  “Cody…” she said, breaking the silence, “I think you are going to be a star and you’re going to be a star because I am going to make you one. I really believe in you.”