Ryan's Love (Sawyer Brothers #1)

by C. A. Harms

  “Have a fun night, baby girl.” I hoped a little time with her girlfriend would do her good. “I love you.”

  “Love you too, Dad,” Olivia said just before hanging up.

  ***

  Amber had no idea I was coming over, and I wanted to surprise her. So I parked my truck along the road in front of the bakery and walked around the back toward the door that led up to her apartment above it. I pressed the buzzer and waited with a huge smile on my face. This would be the first night I’d seen her since our disaster of an evening. But I was a little nervous about where she and I stood, and that made me irritated. It was time I clarified just how much I wanted her in my life.

  The door opened and Bailey stood behind it. She had a knowing gleam in her eye and a wide smile on her lips. “Well hello, handsome. You didn’t happen to bring your sexy-as-sin brother along with you, did you?” She leaned forward and peeked over my shoulder.

  “Sorry, I’m alone.” I shrugged and chuckled as she pretended to pout. Jackson had filled me in on their night at the bar. He couldn’t stop filling me in, actually, and the last thing I wanted to know was what Bailey could do with her tongue.

  “I’ll let it slide this time, but only because you’re too good-looking for me to hold a grudge against.” She motioned me inside and closed the door behind me. Bailey was a character. She looked so innocent, but she was far from it. “Top of the stairs, down the hall, and first door on the right.”

  I didn’t wait for further direction before I jogged up the stairs. I stopped at the door I knew belonged to Amber and knocked lightly.

  “Come in, goof. Why are you knocking?” she called.

  I twisted the knob, pushed the door open, and swallowed hard at the sight before me. Amber was lying on her bed, on her stomach, wearing only a tank top and panties. She appeared to be reading something.

  I stepped into the room and closed the door behind me. When she finally looked up and noticed I was there, she spun around quickly, grabbed for the nearest pillow, and placed it over her lap. “Ryan,” she said in surprise. “I thought you were Bailey.”

  “Sorry to disappoint you,” I whispered as I sat down on the bed beside her.

  “I’m not disappointed, I was just a little surprised.” She was eyeing me closely, trying to figure me out.

  I looked down at her lap and trailed the tip of my finger along her exposed thigh. Her skin was so soft, and she shivered from my touch. “I wanted to see you. I needed to see you, actually.” Her breath hitched when I slid my hand just beneath the pillow, and her body stilled. I was almost sure she even held her breath.

  I grabbed the corner and tugged as she released her hold and balled her fists in her lap. “You are so gorgeous, don’t cover yourself up,” I told her while allowing my gaze to scan her body. “So beautiful,” I whispered as I slid a little closer. “Sexy.” My voice felt strained even to my own ears. I traced the tip of my finger over the small strip of her exposed stomach, and Amber shivered. She remained silent, but her eyes were glazed over. The sexual desire pooled between us, and I couldn’t remember the last time I had felt this turned-on.

  I leaned over, pulled my boots from my feet, and let them fall to the floor before I spun around and crawled toward her. Her eyes grew wide and her throat bobbed as she swallowed hard.

  “What are you doing?” she asked as she rolled backward and rested her head on the pillow behind her. Allowing my body to rest against hers, I propped myself up with my arms on each side of her head. “Ryan,” she whispered while I nudged myself between her thighs.

  “I’m letting go. I’m acting on what my heart is telling me to do. I can’t continue to hold back.” I kissed her just below her ear. “I want you, Amber. I want all of you,” I whispered against her ear, assuring her this was exactly what I wanted. “Can I spend the night?” My heart raced as I waited for her answer.

  “Yes.” Her whisper was more of a moan. “Please stay.”

  Her body felt unbelievable beneath mine. She fit perfectly against me. I took my time kissing her and touching her. I wanted this to last. I wanted to leave no part of her untouched.

  Sliding my hand along her side, I soon felt the hem of her shirt beneath my fingers and slowly began to lift. As I felt the swell of her breast against my fingertips, my heart beat faster.

  “You’re perfect, so sweet,” I breathed.

  Amber rested her hands firmly on my chest before she glided them over my stomach and brought them to rest at my hips. She gently tugged then, attempting to bring my body closer, and immediately wrapped her legs around my waist to hold me in place. My name fell from her lips in a needy whisper. “Ryan.”

  Hearing her pant my name so desperately urged me further. I reached over my shoulder, gathered my shirt, and began tugging it over my head. Her hands were just as busy as mine in removing the items of clothing that separated us.

  “I’ve thought about this moment so many times,” she confessed, and I smiled against her lips, immediately remembering her confession at the bar.

  “Me too, baby,” I assured her. “You are always on my mind, Amber.”

  Our moans and sighs mingled as we frantically continued to undress, eager to feel one another without restriction.

  Hovering over her now-naked body, I couldn’t help myself from taking a moment to appreciate her beauty. Her light brown hair fanned out over the light color of the pillow, and her perfect body beneath me begged to be touched.

  I dipped my head and traced her nipple with my tongue before pulling it into my mouth and sucking softly. Her body instinctively arched toward my lips, and she combed her fingers through my hair as she moaned, pressing her breast closer to my hungry mouth. I continued to suck gently before moving to the other side to show it equal attention.

  The only item of clothing still separating us were my boxers, and even they couldn’t hide how excited her body was. I could feel her heat against me as I thrust my hips forward and hit the spot that drove her wild.

  “I need you, Ryan. God, I want you,” she whispered against my ear, and I removed my lips from her breast and looked up at her hungry eyes with a grin. Slowly I kissed my way up her chest and neck and over her jaw until I reached her lips once more.

  Our tongues tangled as we explored each other’s mouths. “I want you too,” I confessed. “More than anything else, I want this.” We were both breathing heavily, and my heart was rapidly beating as I continued to roam my hands over her body.

  Amber lifted her hips and rubbed herself against me, begging me for more without saying the words.

  “It’s been a long time, so I can assure you I’m clean,” I said. I wanted nothing more than to enter her without restriction. But if she showed any amount of hesitation, I would get the condom I had tucked in my wallet before leaving the truck.

  “I’m clean, I’m protected. I just want you now.” Her voice was laced with impatient need. “I take the pill, and I was tested before I left Chicago.”

  I had forgotten until that moment about her bastard ex cheating on her and was glad she was smart enough to get checked out after that mess.

  I carefully began to slide my boxers down my thighs, and her eager hands rushed to offer assistance. It was almost funny how needy she had become within minutes. After kicking my underwear to the floor, I lowered myself against her once more, gliding my hardness through her warmth. My heart was racing, and my hands shook as I appreciatively roamed them over her body. Our gazes locked on one another, and in that moment my chest tightened at the longing in her eyes. Our desire for each other was thick. I knew this was what I wanted, more than anything.

  Slowly and as gentle as possible, I guided myself into her and watched as her eyes began to roll back from the pleasure our bodies were experiencing. She circled my waist with her legs and pulled me as close as possible. I had to fist the sheets at her sides to control my animalistic urges. The warmth of her engulfed me, and chills of pleasure covered me. I was fighting the need to let go and tak
e control.

  As Amber’s eyes fluttered open, she stared up at me, and something inside me changed in that moment. She was unbelievably beautiful, and any reservations lingering within me faded. I knew for sure now that Amber was my second chance.

  The emotional force of that understanding overtook me, and my throat ached and my chest constricted as I leaned forward and kissed her.

  She combed her hands through my hair as I gripped her hips and began to move in her. Our rocking bodies and the small moans of pleasure falling from our lips that were swallowed by our kisses were amazing.

  “Mm,” she moaned as I swiveled my hips against her, hitting the spot she needed. As she lifted her hips to mimic my movements, our bodies began to create a rhythm of equal thrusts, and the motion gave her the exact friction she needed to drive her over the edge. Within seconds, she tensed and began to tremble beneath my hands.

  “So beautiful,” I whispered against her lips before kissing her through her orgasm. Her facial expressions during the most intense moment I’d felt in such a long time made my mind race. Amber was what I needed. She made me feel more in the last five weeks than I had felt in the last three years.

  She gripped my waist and dug her fingers into my flesh. “Ryan,” she gasped as the final shivers left her body.

  I continued to move against her, watching her heaving chest, her lust-filled eyes. Relaxing completely against her, I cupped her jaw and brought my lips to hers. Our tongues tangled once more as I picked up the pace and began thrusting my hips. Whimpers of pleasure and grunts of satisfaction fell from her lips as I drove back before slamming against her once more.

  I was so close. Those little flickers of lights were beginning to fill my peripheral vision. My legs began to tingle, and all at once my own orgasm took over.

  I buried my head against her shoulder and rocked against her over and over as my body shook with pleasure.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Amber

  Oh my God. Wow.

  Any coherent thought had fled. I couldn’t think, I couldn’t form full sentences. I was momentarily speechless, and it felt amazing.

  Ryan’s body was heavy against mine, still covering me completely. His head was still buried against my neck as his deep, exhausted breaths fanned out over my shoulder. He was silent as he softly stroked my thigh.

  I hadn’t expected him to show up here tonight, though I knew the person who knocked at my bedroom door wasn’t Alena, since she had gone back to Chicago yesterday. I certainly didn’t expect him to make love to me, but I had to admit it was mind-blowing. He was so attentive and careful and made me feel beautiful and desired, something I hadn’t felt with any of my past lovers.

  He shifted against me as he rolled a little to the left, taking the weight of his body off mine. He still hadn’t spoken, and for a moment I worried he regretted what had just happened between us.

  “Are you okay?” I asked.

  Still breathing deeply, he nodded against my neck without speaking. His silence stirred panic deep within my stomach.

  “Are you sure everything is okay?” A burning sensation filled my throat.

  He rose up on his elbow and looked into my eyes as he lifted his hand and ran his thumb over my jaw. “Everything is perfect. You are perfect.” He leaned over and placed his lips against mine, and the emotions I was attempting to hold back washed over me.

  I tried to hide the trembling of my lips by pulling him closer, but he noticed.

  “Hey.” He pulled back once more and looked into my eyes. “What’s going on in that head of yours?”

  I tried to blink back the tears, but one fell anyway. I felt the moisture as it rolled down my cheek. Ryan swiped it away with his thumb as he looked down at me with concern.

  “Did I hurt you?” I could hear the worry in his voice.

  I shook my head and tried to stop acting like such an overemotional girl. “I’m fine, really.”

  “Baby, you aren’t fine. Talk to me,” he insisted.

  “I just thought maybe you regretted being with me. You were so quiet, and I worried that—” His lips smashed against mine, stopping me from continuing my craziness.

  Our kiss quickly changed to more than just a gentle reassurance. I could feel him becoming aroused once more against my thigh.

  “I don’t regret being with you. I’m overwhelmed by you,” he whispered as he covered my body with his once more. “You are quickly becoming someone I need in my life. I adore you, Amber. Yes, that’s scary and something I never thought I could feel, but I do. Don’t let your mind roam there. I don’t regret tonight.”

  His kiss took me over once more as he pulled his hips back from mine and his hardness nudged against me. I opened up to him and wrapped one leg over his hip, allowing him to enter me again. I bit my lower lip as I looked up at him. His eyes were shifted downward as he watched where our bodies were now joined as one. His jaw tensed, and he rocked his hips gently until he was completely inside me, then his gaze moved back to mine. “You are amazing, and I could never regret a moment of the time you allow me to share with you. I’m alive when I’m with you, baby. I’m finally able to feel again, and that, beautiful girl, is because of you.”

  Holy shit. If I hadn’t already been an emotional mess, I was now.

  Ryan made love to me once more, with gentle touches and sweet kisses, and my heart felt like it was going to explode from his meaningful words. My body instinctually responded to him, as if his touch had been pleasing me for a lifetime.

  I knew I was falling for him hard and fast. He was everything I had ever wanted, and if I could have stayed in that moment with him forever, I would have. I had never felt so treasured in my life.

  He kept his eyes locked on mine, even when I felt the familiar tingle in my stomach. And when I reached the point of ecstasy and my back arched off the bed, his stare still stayed on me.

  “You are so amazing,” he whispered as I gripped the sheets at my sides. “Unbelievably beautiful. I feel like my heart is going to beat out of my chest when I’m with you.” His mouth hovered over mine, and I could feel his breath on my lips. “I love how you make me feel every time you look at me. You give me back so much of the man I’d thought I’d lost.”

  He covered my mouth with his, and I knew in that moment I was in love with Ryan Sawyer.

  ***

  A faint ringing filled the silence of the darkness. Ryan was spooned behind me, his arm wrapped around my waist and his leg thrown over mine. I tried to shift to my back, but he tightened his arm around me and pulled me closer.

  It sounded like a phone ringing, but it had finally stopped.

  I cuddled back into Ryan just as the ringing began once again. I nudged him with my shoulder, and he groaned in protest. “I think your phone is ringing.”

  Attempting to wake Ryan was like trying to wake up the dead; he did not budge. I pushed a little harder, and he released his hold on me, rolling over onto his back.

  “Woman, you’re gonna wear me out.” He chuckled, peeking out from under the arm he had resting over his eyes.

  I smiled in return, remembering how we had eventually passed out after our last round of sex. “I wasn’t waking you up for that. Your phone is ringing.”

  He looked to the other side of the bed and was just about to reach for his phone when the bedroom door burst open and light poured in. I clutched the sheet to my naked chest, and Ryan sat up straight in bed.

  Noah filled the open doorframe, and Bailey stood a few feet behind him. Both of them looked terrified.

  “Olivia’s been in a car accident.” Noah’s voice was laced with panic. “They convinced Jackie’s parents to let them walk to the ice cream parlor. They gave them an hour, and when they didn’t return, her parents went looking for them.”

  “Is she okay?” Ryan began scrambling for his clothes, not caring he was completely naked and his brother and Bailey could see him. “Tell me she’s okay, Noah,” he demanded while placing one leg into his jeans,
followed by the next one.

  “They were with Charlie,” Noah continued. Ryan’s body tensed at the mention of the name. “They were out on Willow Grove, and he took the bend entirely too fast.” I began to shake as I imagined what he was describing. “He flipped the car, and it rolled into the ravine.”

  Ryan sat down on the edge of my bed with his head hung low. His shoulders shifted as he took in a deep breath. “Please, Noah, just tell me my little girl is okay. I can’t lose her too.”

  His words made my throat feel as if it was constricting and cutting off the air I needed to breathe.

  “Jackie was able to call 9-1-1, and we got them. They’re at the hospital. All three of them are banged up pretty good, but they’ll be fine.”

  Noah’s reassuring words seemed to bring Ryan back to life. His back began to shake as he sobbed into his hands, the emotional roller coaster he had just experienced hitting him hard.

  Noah came forward and helped him from the bed, then led him toward the hallway. “I’m sure he’ll call ya later,” he said to me as they left.

  I sat in my bed, still clutching the sheet to my chest. My heart was breaking.

  Bailey followed behind them, and once she’d locked the front door, she joined me in my room. “Are you okay?”

  I nodded and grabbed my tank top off the floor before turning my back to my best friend. After I slipped it on over my head, I began searching for my panties.

  “Do you think I should go be with him? Or do you think it isn’t my place?” I felt horrible for not offering him support, but I worried my presence would only make things worse.

  “I don’t know. I mean, I wouldn’t want him to think you didn’t care,” she replied.

  That was my exact concern. I was worried that not showing up would make me come across as a self-absorbed bitch to his family. “Maybe we could just drive to the hospital, just so they know I do care about Olivia. I may not truly know her, but she’s Ryan’s daughter, and that means she’s important to me too.”