Shadows Within (The Dark Mind Trilogy Book 2)

by Matthew Goldstein

  He’s coming home now, the voice said. Get into a hiding spot in case they come down this block.

  He’s not home?

  Not yet. Now HIDE!

  The roaring silent voice scared her senseless and she stumbled up someone’s driveway into their backyard, constantly checking to see if anyone saw her. After a minute of paranoia, she had had enough. Is it safe yet?

  Yes, but keep out of sight of his house until I say.

  This is so boring! What do you want me to do?

  Not my problem.

  Her boredom and frustration ever growing, she wandered the neighborhood, shivering in the cool weather while the temperature continued to drop with the setting sun. By the time she had passed the same house for the fifth time, her patience was wearing thin. Her teeth were chattering and no amount of exercise or self-hugging could warm her.

  Screw this. I’m freezing to death. I’m going home.

  No, you’re not.

  Then I’m going in to talk to Cole.

  No, you’re not.

  Oh yeah? How are you going to stop me?

  Trust me. You do not want to disobey.

  You’re all talk. I don’t believe you can actually do anything. That time I was supposed to die? Well guess what? I’m still here. Cole stopped you and so can I.

  That’s not what happened.

  Don’t try to confuse me. I know what happened.

  You sure about that? Did you hear the instructions? Do you really think Dr. Stern’s disappearance was a coincidence? Perhaps the instructions said he had to kill Dr. Stern or you would die.

  I’m not listening. You’re just trying to mess with me.

  You can’t block me out. Cole knew that he couldn’t stop us from fulfilling our consequence. He killed Dr. Stern to save you.

  I don’t care what you say. I am not going to believe you. However, inside of her, the doubts had formed and they would not be so easily dismissed. She had to admit that the timing of Dr. Stern’s disappearance was strange. No matter how slim the chance, what if the voice was telling the truth? Was it really worth finding out? After all, it wasn’t asking that much of her. You win.

  Good.

  Distracted by this newfound mystery, Amy did not notice the cold as much. She found a spot out of the chilly breeze and huddled up to wait out the evening, playing games on her cell phone until her fingers were numb. She was aware that she looked like a homeless person, huddled up on someone’s front lawn, but it was late enough that few people were outside. She got a couple of odd looks but no one said anything.

  As the sun faded below the horizon, the voice spoke again. Find a way to the bowling alley.

  Now?

  Yes, hurry. It’s far. I recommend the bus.

  I have no idea how to get there.

  The 79 line. It’s two block away. I’ll guide you.

  Following the voice’s instructions, she was outside the bowling alley twenty minutes later, warmed up from the bus ride. As she expected, she was told to wait around the corner out of sight and an hour later she was riding the bus back, thankful for her student pass that gave her free bus rides.

  She returned to the same spot she had been huddled in before. As the night wore on, it brought with it an enveloping exhaustion. In the cold she could not get much sleep, but rather drifted in and out until her leg fell asleep and she had to stand up.

  You should wait outside his house now.

  Amy, her leg still stiff, walked the two blocks to Beth’s house and sat on the curb, her mind whirling, her body freezing. She sat there for a half hour until she heard a voice again, but this time it was not internal.

  * * *

  Cole listened to the story with growing horror and despair. Amy spoke quickly as if she was being timed for the story, and when she had finished, he had no idea what to think except that he knew the question that Amy would ask him.

  He was wrong.

  “There’s a lot we need to talk about but right now I need your help,” she said. “This stupid voice has been rattling off since I’ve been here. I need you to get rid of it. Please tell me you know how.” At Cole’s hesitation, the hope she had held out crashed and burned within her.

  “What is it saying?” Cole said.

  “Well, for starters it’s been saying I’d better not tell you exactly what I just told you. It’s not happy now. I only told you because I thought you’d be able to help me.”

  “Okay, we’ll figure this out. Do you remember those techniques you watched my mom teach me? Try to block it out. Put up a mental shield between you and the voice.”

  Amy’s face was frightened but she nodded. She closed her eyes and was still for many seconds before her eyes flew back open. “I don’t know how,” she whimpered despondently. “I don’t know if I can. It only gets louder the more I try. It’s so hard to concentrate with it yelling at me.”

  Cole wrapped his fingers around hers reassuringly. “Keep trying.”

  “Okay, okay, yeah I can do this.” She closed her eyes tighter, an intense look of concentration on her face.

  Cole held his breath as he watched her face, any of his feelings of resentment washed away in his concern. He prayed for her success, that she would not have to share his blight, which would be yet another thing that was his fault.

  She squeezed her eyes tighter, and then she was holding her head and moaning. “I can’t do it. It won’t leave. It’s saying it will kill me.” Her eyes opened, glistening with welling tears. “I’m scared, Cole. I don’t want to die.”

  This has to be up to me, but am I capable of doing this? Is it even possible? He sank into his subconscious, keeping half his mind in the real world. “What’s it saying right now? I’m going to attempt to find it. Just keep repeating what it’s saying.”

  Amy’s voice was weak as she recited the words in her head. “Bitch. You’re only making it worse for yourself. Repeat one more thing I say and you’re going to suffer. Okay, if that’s what you want.” She stopped speaking as a scream of pain escaped her mouth.

  Cole had been trying in vain to find the voice that was saying those words, but with each menacing sentence his concentration waned and his desperation rose. The scream annihilated his concentration and he pulled Amy in close. “No, don’t give in. Fight it. I know you can. You’re stronger than it.” She gave no response save for a whimper, her face contorted in agony.

  Come on, you have to do this! He dove headlong into his subconscious, completely leaving the world behind except for his safety image of Amy that would bring him back. Help me, someone! he yelled at the drifting voices, but they were apathetic to his plea. He searched desperately, coming up empty, and then raced back to his consciousness to check on Amy.

  She was on the floor now, curled up and unmoving except for heavy, raspy breaths. “Hang in there,” Cole said. He changed his tactic, focusing on Amy. Instead of pushing his mind inwards, he pushed it out, staring intently at her face and straining for a sign of a voice.

  Then, in a moment of elation, it was there. He could not hear what it was saying but there was a distinctive muttering and he was certain it was not coming from within himself. He focused all of this energy on the voice, reaching out to it but uncertain what to do when he found it. It was like trying to find a specific cloud in an impenetrable fog, but he strained every ounce of concentration he had and finally pinpointed the voice. He latched onto it and yanked his own mind back into his own head. Unsure what he had just done or how he had done it, he was back in his body with no sign of the voice he had snagged. He looked to Amy in defeat, ready to try again, but then he heard a faint angry muttering.

  You son of a bitch, it said. How dare you-

  Cole shoved up his mental barrier and the voice was gone. He became slowly aware of his heavy breathing and a tingling sensation in his limbs, and with it came the euphoria of success.

  Amy lowered her hands from her head and sat up, her wide eyes scared but elated. “It’s gone. Did you do that?”
<
br />   “I don’t know. I think so.”

  “Oh, Cole.” She flung her arms around him and planted a kiss on his cheek. “I really thought that was it. You saved my life. Twice now. Thank you so much.”

  “Well, you were only in danger because of me.”

  “It wasn’t your fault. Take the complement.” She pressed her lips to his and he returned the kiss, dumbstruck but unable to resist.

  “What was happening to you?” Cole said.

  “I’m not sure exactly.” She shivered at the memory. “It was like he was in my brain, triggering every nerve of my body. There was so much pain everywhere, I couldn’t even think straight. Then all of a sudden, I stopped hearing that godforsaken voice and the pain up and disappeared. All at once it was as if nothing had ever happened. How did you get it out?”

  “I wish I knew. I was desperate and tried to reach into your head and then I grabbed it and fled. I thought I had lost it but it must have had a weak connection to you, which I think is the only reason it worked.”

  “You reached into my head? Weird...“

  “Amy, what the hell?” a voice interrupted.

  They both whipped around to see Beth standing in the open doorway.

  “When did you get here?” she said and then her face fell. “Please tell me you didn’t run away.”

  “It’s a long story,” Amy said, averting her eyes.

  “No, she didn’t run away,” Cole said. “But looks like our theory was accurate. A voice infected her.”

  Beth’s eyes widened. “What? Are they in her now?”

  “No, I extracted it.”

  “How?”

  “I honestly am not sure. But it seems to be gone now.”

  “Can it get back in?” Amy said, afraid once more.

  “I have no idea,” Cole said. “I’m hopefully keeping it locked up but if you hear it again, let me know immediately.”

  Amy nodded. “You bet I will.” She turned to Beth. “Sarah thinks I’m spending the night at Alexia’s. I don’t really want to go back now.”

  “You can stay the night,” Beth said. “I don’t want to drive you now anyway. I’m going back to sleep. We’ll discuss this in the morning.” She yawned and trudged off.

  Now that the emergency had passed and the adrenaline was wearing off, Amy’s presence was taking on a whole new meaning. “So, I guess you’re staying the night?” Cole said.

  “I’m sorry. I know this is kinda weird but it’s too late to go home and I’d be afraid to be away from you in case it comes back.”

  “No, you’re right. You should stay here.”

  “I’ll sleep on the couch.” She picked herself up off the floor and turned to go.

  Cole grabbed her arm. “You don’t have to.”

  Amy looked down at him, torn. “Look, I appreciate what you did for me. I really do. But I still don’t know if we can work. You have to understand that.”

  “I know, it’s okay.”

  Amy gave in and sat back down beside Cole, who arranged the blankets to go to sleep. The two of them lay down side by side, facing each other.

  “There’s something I need to ask,” Amy said, biting her lip.

  “Of course, anything,” Cole said, although he dreaded the question he knew was coming.

  “Did you really…are you responsible for Dr. Stern’s disappearance?” Cole’s silence was answer enough. Amy simply nodded and closed her eyes. “I thought so.”

  “It was the only way I could save your life. It’s been eating me inside every day.”

  Amy did not open her eyes. “I know.” She paused. “I really hope I’m worth it.” A single tear traced a streak down the side of her face.

  “You are.”

  Amy squeezed the blanket tightly in her fist. “I’m going to sleep. I’ve had enough for today.”

  Cole ran a hand through her hair but she gave no response. “Good night.” He expected to be awake all night, but the excitement took a greater toll than he thought and he was soon fast asleep.

  32

  He was awoken by Amy stirring, and he opened his eyes to find that his arm had found its way around her while he slept. He retracted it and, overwhelmed by a sudden longing to be with her, he sat up and scurried back to the wall.

  Amy sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. “Good morning.”

  “Morning,” he said, keeping his back to the wall.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Bad dream.”

  Amy opened her mouth to respond but was interrupted by a knock at the door.

  At Cole’s invitation, Beth poked her head in. “Almost time to leave for school. You’d better get ready quickly.”

  “Sounds good,” Cole said, fleeing to the bathroom to brush his teeth.

  Beth was waiting for him outside the bathroom. “We need to go. Today,” she whispered. “This has gone too far.”

  Cole nodded. “I just need to talk to Travis’ mom one more time. Can you find out when the next visiting hours are?”

  “All right.” She placed a call to the prison and informed him they had two hours of visiting hours after lunch.

  Cole had hoped to skip school since it was soon to be a thing of the past and the last thing he wanted to do was see everyone one last time. However, as visiting hours at the prison weren’t until lunchtime and he wanted to be close to Amy as long as possible in case she heard another voice, he proposed he stay for the morning and leave at the beginning of lunch. Beth approved, saying she would sign him out of school. Once the plan was finalized, there was one loose end to tie up. Before they left, he pulled Amy into the library and told her they had to talk.

  “I’m going to leave school at lunchtime today,” he said. “I don’t know where I’m going or how long I’ll be gone but it may be far and it may be a long time.”

  Amy’s face was full of trepidation. “Why do you have to leave?”

  “I’m going to find some answers. I need to end these voices once and for all.”

  “But what about me? Take me with you. You can’t leave me alone. What if they come back?”

  “You can call Beth’s cell if anything happens, but trust me, the farther away from you I am the better. They attack those close to me and the less contact we have, the less power over you they will have. Soon enough, you will be safe. But with me, you’ll never be safe. I can’t chance that.”

  Sorrow added itself to the trepidation. “Wait, what are you saying? I need you in my life. I changed my mind. I do want to be with you. Whatever that means, and whatever the risk, I want to be there with you. I’ll take my chances. Wherever you need to go, I’m coming.”

  Cole kissed her gently, calling forth every ounce of strength within him. “I’m sorry. I can’t chance it. I could never handle being responsible if something were to happen to you. You have to understand that. Maybe someday, if I’m successful, we could be something.”

  Amy was too choked up to respond so she nodded and embraced Cole in a firm hug. “Good luck,” she whispered in his ear.

  The awkward ride to school was quiet, as was the walk with Amy to homeroom. Cole did his best to avoid looking at her as every glance threatened his resolve. Amy held his hand throughout homeroom, but also avoided making eye contact.

  At the end of homeroom, Michelle came running up. “Hey, guys! Last night was really fun. We should hang out again soon.”

  “Yep,” Cole said. “I have to get to class.” He turned and walked away, leaving Michelle immobile, staring after him. When he reached the intersection of the hallway where he had to part ways with Amy, he finally chanced a look at her. “I’ll meet you outside the cafeteria at the beginning of lunch to say goodbye.”

  “Okay.” Amy ducked her head and hurried away.

  Cole observed the three classes before lunch as if from far away, as if he had already left. He had already detached himself from this life, his mind on the journey ahead and what it may bring. Much hinged on the information that Travis’ mother may or may
not know, and he could not stop kicking himself for failing to ask Travis for this simple information during the ample time he had. Now what should have been an easy task would have to be a miracle.

  When lunch arrived, he hung back against the wall outside the entrance to the cafeteria to wait for Amy. Martin and his friends came by and Martin stopped next to Cole.

  “What are you waiting outside for?” Martin said.

  “Just waiting to talk to Amy.”

  “All right…Guess I’ll see you inside?”

  “Yep.”

  Martin walked away but did a double take before entering the cafeteria. Amy arrived a minute later, the same trepidation showing on her face as before.

  “So you haven’t changed your mind about anything?” she said.

  Cole shook his head. “This is goodbye for a while. But hopefully, if it goes well, I’ll be able to see you again soon.”

  The tears returned to Amy’s eyes and she squeezed Cole in a passionate hug before planting a long kiss on his lips. “Come back soon, ‘kay?”

  “I will try.” Before his emotions got the best of him, he left, refusing to look back, afraid he would lose his conviction. He met Beth in the principal’s office where she signed him out for the day as if he was going home sick and would be back tomorrow.

  He sure felt sick, enough so that he wanted to vomit. He already missed Amy dearly and he could not fathom the thought of not seeing her again. He prayed that he would find a solution quickly so that he could return to her. Until then, he knew her face would fill his every waking moment. It already did.

  “How you doing?” Beth said, interrupting his circle of depression.

  “I'll be okay,” he mumbled, ending the conversation.

  When they arrived at the prison, Travis’ mom was ecstatic to see him again, something which Cole found odd.

  “How have you two been?” she said.

  “I - We’re good. There’s something I was hoping you could help us with. Do you happen to know how Travis found me? What kind of technique he used to locate me?”

  Travis’ mom’s eyebrows furrowed suspiciously. “Why can’t you ask him? He would obviously know better than me.”