Jennifer's Crush

by Laura Anne Turner

  I was just about to leave when I heard cheers and applause. I turned around to see what was going on and it took my breath away. Lena and Paulina were dancing together in a close embrace. I was so happy for them and admired their courage. I could not help myself and clapped my hands in applause.

  Will I ever have the guts to do the same?

  I turned around and left Goethe High School for good. I took my phone out of my purse and called Sherinia to pick me up.

  +++

  “And now I want to strip you out of this skimpy dress,” Sherinia said in her apartment a little while later.

  We were drinking Champagne and danced like children in her living room. She was wearing a short black dress and black stockings. We had both gotten rid of our shoes already. She took me in her arms and kissed me hard. Then she helped me to get out of my dress.

  “I want to do something special with you today,” she whispered in my ear.

  I shivered as she took my hand and led me to her bedroom.

  “Sit down on the bed, sweetie,” she commanded and I obeyed willingly.

  “Have you ever been blindfolded during sex?”

  I shook my head as another shiver ran down my spine. My eyes followed her as she moved to the dresser, opened a drawer, and took something out of it.

  “Do you mind me blindfolding you?”

  “Please do,” I answered in a husky voice as my excitement and arousal increased.

  Sherinia showed me a black silk scarf before everything became dark. I couldn’t see anything, but my other senses were alert.

  “Is it okay if I restrained you with another scarf? If you don’t like it just say no,” Sherinia said.

  “It’s okay,” I whispered.

  “Good girl,” she said as she took off my bra. “Now lay down on the bed and raise your arms above your head.”

  Again I followed her command and my whole body felt heated and flushed. I felt how Sherinia bound my wrists together.

  “Now I’m going to get you out of your panties,” she announced.

  I felt her kiss my belly button and then she began to pull my panties down. I lifted my butt to help her.

  “Spread your legs now, babe,” she said and I could hear the arousal in Sherinia’s voice.

  I willingly spread my legs and felt her tie another silky scarf or ribbon around my ankles, which she tied to the bed. My juices were flowing and I sweated profusely, while my thoughts were running wild.

  What is she going to do to me?

  Then I heard music, a piano that sounded like raindrops followed by a solo of an electric guitar. The next moment I felt Sherinia’s naked body next to mine. In spite of the heat I shivered. She began to kiss me, a soft and tender kiss at first that became more and more passionate while her hands began to move over my body. One hand cupped my breast and pinched my already erect nipple. She began to kiss her way down to my breasts and started to tease, lick, and suck my nipples.

  Suddenly she stopped and I felt a cold liquid on my breasts.

  “It’s champagne, honey,” Sherinia whispered.

  She started to lick the bubbly from my breasts and further down my belly and I began to squirm and cringe, but could not escape her soft touch. Next I felt the cool bubbling liquid flow from my belly down between my thighs where it mingled with my own juices. Sherinia’s tongue followed the rivulets and reached the places where I needed her most. She teased and tasted me and I heard her slurp and smack. I moaned loudly and arched my back to increase the contact, but she pressed my hips down on the bed. I groaned in frustration. Like in my dream Sherinia teased and aroused me until I felt my climax build and when I was nearly there she stopped and denied me orgasm. I began to tremble and tear at my restraints, but it was no use. She began to tease me again and the game started anew. I was close to desperation and thought I couldn’t stand it any longer. I began to beg and pray for my release.

  “Please Sherinia, make me cum, please, please, please, I can’t stand it any longer.”

  “Okay honey, you may cum now.”

  She began to suck my clit and fuck me with her fingers and I begged her to fuck me harder and faster, and harder and faster. At the same time I felt that she straddled me and pressed her pussy on my mouth and I sucked and licked her like crazy. And this time she made me cum. I cried out loud and exploded in an orgasm that I thought my brain and body and my whole self would dissolve into nothingness.

  I didn’t know how much time elapsed until I came to my senses again. I found that Sherinia had taken away my restraints and my blindfold. I squinted as I opened my eyes to the candlelight in the dark bedroom. Sherinia lay next to me on her elbow and watched my face. I saw the smile on her face and her sparkling green-blue eyes.

  “Welcome back to earth, honey,” she said softly and placed a kiss on my lips.

  I still wasn’t able to speak, nor could I move. Later I remembered the night after my graduation as the night of my most powerful climax ever and as the beginning of the end of my being high all the time.

  CHAPTER NINETEEN – THE END OF MY WORLD AS I KNEW IT

  “So what are you going to do now that you have graduated,” Sherinia asked.

  “That’s the same question my mother keeps on asking me. Only she is going to kick me out of the apartment, if I don’t come up with an answer soon.”

  We were sitting outside on the terrace of a coffee lounge overlooking the river. It was one of those fancy places in town I’d never been to before. The weather was nice and sunny with mild temperatures. I had on a black sleeveless T-shirt and faded blue cutoffs. Sherinia wore a skimpy light-green sleeveless V-neck shirt that revealed her cleavage and her belly button piercing, and dark-blue shorts. She looked gorgeous as always. Her right arm rested casually on the back of my chair and her hand on my arm.

  “Why don’t you move out anyway?” Sherinia asked.

  “That’s about the only thing I’m planning,” I said. “Now that I have achieved my most important goal, the graduation, I feel completely drained. I’ve no idea if I want to study or not and if so which subject. I think I’ll take my time to decide.”

  Sherinia put her Gucci sunglasses on.

  “I guess that’s a good decision.”

  “I will get me a fulltime job and find me an apartment. I think these are the next steps I have to take.”

  I took a sip from my Latte Macchiato. “And I want to be together with my wonderful girlfriend as often as possible,” I added.

  I leaned in and kissed her. Normally I was too shy to kiss Sherinia in public, while she didn’t know such scruples. She took me in her arms and we began to make out. As usual I was completely lost in her kiss and when it ended I opened my eyes again – to look into the flabbergasted faces of Robin and Andrea.

  Jesus Christ!

  My stomach clenched and I bit my bottom lip. Sherinia saw the horror on my face and turned around.

  “Oh hi! Good to see you guys,” she exclaimed as if it was her greatest pleasure to see them.

  “Hi!” Even a tough guy like Robin didn’t manage to say more. Andrea’s mouth stood wide open.

  “C’mon sit down and have a drink with us,” Sherinia said as she made an inviting gesture with her arm.

  “Uh, sorry we can’t. We are meeting up with some other folks to hang out,” Robin stammered. “See you on Friday, I guess.”

  “Yep, see you on Friday,” Sherinia said.

  Robin and Andrea turned around and left without another word.

  “Guess we just came out to our band mates,” Sherinia said as her eyes followed Robin and Andrea.

  I covered my mouth with my left hand, unable to say something. I felt sick and exhausted.

  “C’mon, honey, don’t take it too seriously. It was quite clear that something like this would happen sooner or later anyway,” Sherinia said.

  “Oh my God, they are going to tell it Martin,” I whined. “He will feel cheated and betrayed and I will lose my oldest friend. Oh God, what shall I
do?”

  Sherinia took me in her arms.

  “Hush, babe, chill down. Either he will understand or he isn’t worth your friendship.”

  “I need to tell him,” I said, my eyes brimming with tears. “It’s better if he heard it from me than from them.”

  “You’re probably right.”

  With trembling hands I took my phone from my purse and dialed Martin’s number. He took the call after the third ring.

  “Hi Blacky, what’s up?”

  His voice sounded normal, so I assumed Robin had not called him immediately. My throat was very dry and my heart racing as I answered with difficulties.

  “Hi Martin, I need to talk to you. Urgently. Are you at home?”

  “I came in just a few minutes ago. You sound very upset. What is it?”

  “I can’t tell you on the phone. I’ll come to your place. Let’s say in 30 minutes?”

  “Okay Blacky.”

  I ended the call and my hand with the phone dropped to my lap. Sherinia looked at me with concern.

  “Are you sure you can make it? I’ll give you a ride.”

  I nodded. Sherinia paid our check and we walked to her car. We were silent during the ride to Martin’s. Only Sherinia patted my thigh every now and then. She parked the car at the curb in front of Martin’s home. His car was in the drive.

  “I’ll wait here for you, babe. If you need help just call me. Okay? Now get going.”

  “Thank you, Sherinia.”

  I took a deep breath before I got out of the car and made my way to the entrance door. I hadn’t even rung the bell when the door opened and Martin stood in the entrance. His face was tight, his mouth a thin line. He was very pale and did not look into my eyes. Neither did he hug me as usual.

  Jesus Christ, now he knows.

  My stomach clenched and I felt sick. I wanted to turn around and run away.

  “I’m so sorry, Martin,” I said with a trembling voice.

  “Sorry for what?” Martin barked. “That my best friend is gay? That you fuck the girl I love?”

  His words were like a punch into my stomach and I staggered a step backward.

  “Martin, please, let me explain.”

  “There’s nothing to explain. I’ve always loved you Jenny, even when you were a slut and a bitch and lay drunk in the gutter. I accepted that you didn’t love me back. But why didn’t you tell me you were gay? And why the hell do you date Sherinia? Did you turn her into a lesbian? Did you have fun when she turned me down? Were you laughing out loud about a fool like me? I feel like an idiot. Have you ever in your life told me the truth, Jenny? I begin to doubt it. I think you had better go now. And by the way, from now on your lesbo friend can pick you up on Fridays.”

  He yelled the last words at me before he slammed the door shut. I was totally numb. I had lost my only friend. Slowly I dragged my feet back to Sherinia’s car. She hopped out of her SUV and took me in her arms.

  “This didn’t go very well from what I heard,” she said.

  I shook my head and tears trickled down my cheek.

  “C’mon let’s go, we should not be seen like this here,” Sherinia added.

  Like a mom with her child she took my hand and pushed me to the passenger side of her car. She opened the door for me and I climbed inside.

  “Please drive me home, I want to be alone,” I said as Sherinia climbed behind the wheel.

  “Are you sure, honey?”

  “Yes, I am, Sherinia.”

  “If you wish,” she said, sounding annoyed.

  I laid my hand on her arm.

  “Please, Sherinia, don’t be mad at me, I’ve got enough for one day.”

  She smiled weakly as she said “It’s okay, babe, I understand.” But this time her smile didn’t reach her eyes.

  +++

  The doorbell rang at a quarter past 6pm. It was Friday afternoon, two days after the disaster with Martin. Of course Sherinia was late and I hated it.

  I had had a job interview earlier that day and despite of my bad mood I had been able to get a part-time job at a coffee bar and would start next Monday. Yesterday I had video chatted with Emilia and told her what had happened with Martin only I didn’t mention that I had been together with Sherinia when we were caught. Emilia had been very sweet and had comforted me. Somehow it felt as if she were my only friend left.

  Even though I felt terrible, I grabbed my bass guitar and walked down the hallway to the entrance door of our apartment, when I saw that my mother already opened the door.

  “Hello sweetie – oh, I mean hi Mrs. Meier,” Sherinia said. “I’m Sherinia Walter, a band mate of Jenny, and I’m here to pick her up.”

  My mother ignored Sherinia’s offered handshake and turned around to me. My heart sank.

  “Where is your friend Martin? Why doesn’t he pick you up as usual?”

  “We had a fight recently, but it will be alright, we’ll meet up with Martin at the rehearsal,” I said, hoping to sound convincingly.

  “Bye, mom,” I said and sneaked out the door.

  “Hi Sherinia,” I said, hugging her and putting a quick kiss on her rosy lips.

  “Hi babe,” she answered and returned my kiss.

  We rushed down the stairs and jumped into her SUV.

  “Are you okay?” Sherinia asked.

  “I’m not quite sure, but we’ll see. The band means a lot to me and I don’t want to give up on it.”

  “Besides, with the gig at the summer festival coming up soon they can’t kick us out of the band,” Sherinia remarked.

  We rang the doorbell at Marlon’s place and his girlfriend Sofie opened the door.

  “Hi Jenny, hi Sherinia,” she said as she let us in. “I guess the guys are waiting for you.”

  At least Sofie behaved as usual.

  We went downstairs. In front of the heavy wooden door of the band room I hesitated for a moment. Sherinia looked at me with a smile on her face.

  “Ready for the wolves?”

  I took a deep breath and nodded. “Let’s go.”

  Sherinia took my hand, opened the door, and in we went. Robin sat behind his drum kit, Marlon at his keyboards, and Martin was just tuning his guitar.

  “Hi guys,” Sherinia and I said in unison.

  Martin briefly looked up and continued to tune his guitar. Marlon waved his hand and greeted us with his usual, “Hi girls.” There was a derisive grin on Robin’s face as he too said “Hi girls.” None of them made a comment.

  Marlon took the initiative and reminded us of our upcoming gig and the setlist we had prepared. “Okay then, let’s play the songs in the correct sequence as during the gig.”

  We began with the extended instrumental intro we had played at the Carnival performance, so the first part was only synthesizer and my bass guitar play. I was pretty nervous and it took all of my willpower to get focused on my part. When Sherinia walked over to the microphone tripod and began to sing, I felt a huge relief. I squinted at Martin from time to time, but he ignored me completely and it hurt.

  +++

  “What do you think about it?” Sherinia asked as she stepped out of the changing cubicle to show me the new outfit she intended to buy. It consisted of a black satin blazer and very skimpy and tight black satin shorts. Her sight still took my breath away.

  “Drop-dead gorgeous,” I said.

  It was late Saturday morning two weeks after our coming out to the band. The rehearsals went well, but Martin still didn’t speak to me. Neither Robin nor Marlon said anything negative to us, but the tension in the band room was palpable.

  I had started my part-time job at the coffee bar and had also taken over additional shifts at ‘The Mirror’. I had made up my mind to earn as much money as I could to rent my own apartment. I also had decided not to begin any studies before the spring semester next year. I hoped this would give me enough time to find out what I really wanted to do.

  Sherinia smiled and went back to the changing cubicle. Before she closed the curtai
n she curled her fingers and signaled me to come inside. I knew what she wanted and the familiar rush and throbbing began to spread through my body. I went into the cubicle and closed the curtain behind me. At once Sherinia pressed my back against the thin wall of the cubicle and we began to make out. It was a different shop than last time and only a very short time later we heard the shop assistant approach and ask if everything was okay.

  “Fuck,” I muttered below my breath.

  Sherinia quickly changed to her regular outfit, grabbed the new black satin blazer and shorts, and opened the curtain, while she placed a last brief kiss on my lips. As I looked over her shoulder my whole body became rigid and my heart beat furiously in my chest. I looked directly into the shocked eyes of my mother.

  I wanted to say something, but no word came out of my mouth. Sherinia saw the terrified expression on my face and her head turned around. As usual she was the first to react.

  “Oh hi, Mrs. Meier, good to see you,” she said.

  My mother ignored her completely and kept staring at me.

  “What the hell where you doing in this changing cubicle?” She demanded.

  “She helped me to get dressed, Mrs. Meier, nothing to worry about,” Sherinia offered.

  My mother kept on staring at me with a frown. “I think we need to talk young lady,” she said, turned around and left the shop.

  “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” I cursed.

  “Don’t take it too seriously, sweetie, what could she have seen?” Sherinia said casually.

  “She saw how we kissed.”

  “So what? It’s not that she’s an old spinster. She will cool down.”

  Knowing my mother and her mood swings I was not so sure about it. Sherinia bought her new outfit and we drove back to her fancy apartment. Since I had to work at the wine bar later I needed to go home to change. I dreaded this moment. Sherinia offered to give me a ride home and I was grateful for it. When she parked at the curb in front of our apartment complex I didn’t dare to kiss her goodbye.

  “Do you want me to wait here?” Sherinia asked.

  “No, thank you. I’m okay.”

  “Good. See you later, sweetie.”