Say You Won't Let Go_A Return to Me/Masters and Mercenaries Novella

by Corinne Michaels

“What time does the bus leave?”

  I flip over to my other side so I can look at him. “Not until tonight. Luke likes to travel at night and see the city we’re in during the day. So, I have all day. Why?”

  He smiles while resting his hand on my hip. “Spend the day with me.”

  “Coop.” I sigh. We had talked about this last night. That we’d say goodbye in the morning and keep things light. No complications. No promises. Not until the tour was over and I was back in Tennessee. Then, who knows, but I’m all too aware of how easy it would be for me.

  “It’s breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Just a day of us hanging out,” he presses.

  My eyes narrow slightly, and I pull my lips to the side. “I don’t know. We agreed…”

  “Emmy, we have a very looming expiration date. I’m just askin’ my friend to hang out. Besides, what other options do you have?”

  I roll onto my back and put my elbow over my eyes. In all honesty, I want to spend the day with him. I want to spend as much time as I can with him. Maybe this will quench a little of my thirst for the man next to me.

  Maybe.

  “All right, fine. We’ll go see Dallas together.”

  He climbs on top of me, giving me a sweet kiss on my lips. “I knew you’d cave. You can’t resist me. I’m wearin’ you down.”

  My hand slaps his arm, and I shove him off me. “Yeah, right.” I laugh. “I need to shower. Go get yourself ready, and I’ll meet you in an hour.” I hop off the bed and open the door to the bathroom.

  “Need help?” he offers.

  I turn my head quickly, tossing my blonde hair over my shoulder and grinning. “You wish, Cooper Townsend. You wish. You best be goin’, time is tickin’.”

  * * * *

  An hour later, I’m outside Cooper’s hotel with a roadie’s car that I borrowed. I know exactly where I’m taking him today.

  Cooper comes out, wearing a tight pair of jeans and a flannel shirt with the sleeves rolled up. Dear Lord, he looks good. His wet hair looks almost black, and the green from the shirt makes his eyes look even more emerald. It should be illegal to look so sinful.

  “Darlin’, you need to go back and change,” Cooper says as he looks me up and down.

  “What?” I glance at my outfit, completely baffled by what the issue is. I’m wearing a jean skirt, white tank top, and an off the shoulder floral cover. I look cute.

  “I’m not lookin’ to fight anyone while I’m here.”

  He walks straight to me and pulls me into his arms. “Fight?”

  “Every single man is going to try to get to you, Emily. I’m goin’ to be a busy man fending them off.”

  My hand touches his chest, and I smile. “I think you’re big enough to take them all.”

  “You think so?” he teases.

  “Well, if you aren’t, it’ll be fun to watch you try.”

  He laughs and leans in for a kiss. To any passerby, we probably look like a real couple, and a small part of me wants to run. I know the real way this will turn out. It won’t be smiles and hugs. It’ll be yelling and disappointment because I won’t give up my life and neither should he.

  I’m getting so far ahead of myself.

  For all I know, Cooper just wants to get laid and be done with whatever this is between us. That would be great to delude myself with, but I don’t believe that’s the case.

  “What’s on the agenda?” Cooper asks, pulling me away from my doom and gloom thoughts.

  “Oh, you’re going to love it.”

  He laughs. “I’m sure I will, but I’m a little scared.”

  I hook my arm in his, and we head down the street. It’s only a few blocks away. Neither of us says much as we stroll along. It’s a beautiful day. The sun shines through the clouds providing a shadow.

  “Scared of me?”

  “Weren’t you the one who organized putting food dye in the shower heads?”

  I’d almost forgotten about that. Each year, the boys would prank the girls right before homecoming. It was always something lame and never actually did any damage, but there was no way I was letting them get the edge on us. Presley, Grace, and I snuck into the boys’ locker room with medicine capsules filled with food dye. Once they were in there, it was like a ticking time bomb.

  Whoever turned the shower on when the capsule melted enough was going to get a surprise.

  Of course, the poor kid who turned red wasn’t our target, but it stopped them from even attempting anything that year.

  “Whatever do you mean?” I feign innocence.

  Cooper laughs and jerks his arm out, causing me to sway. “I know better. Presley got double the barn duties that month. I know you all were behind that mess.”

  I grip his thick arm a little tighter. “It was meant for Zach and Wyatt. Those bastards always got us. I did feel bad for Mason. He didn’t deserve to be red for a week.”

  “His mama was mad.”

  I giggle. “Oh, I know.”

  We walk a little farther, and I start to get excited. I’ve never been here, but I thought the irony was just too perfect to pass up.

  We make it to the entrance of Pioneer Plaza, and Cooper bursts out laughing.

  In front of us are hundreds of cattle sculptures. They line the park and walkways, cutting through the water and grass as we enter.

  “This is incredible.”

  I look up and smile. “A little of you is right here in Texas. Cows and all.”

  Cooper throws his arm around my shoulders, tucking me against his side. “Look!” He points over to the sculpture of the cowboy riding alongside the roaming cow.

  “It’s you!”

  He kisses the top of my head. “I don’t wear chaps.”

  “You could totally pull them off.” I joke, sort of.

  “Not since my rodeo days.”

  My hand runs down from his chest over the hard planes of his abs. “I think you should try them on the next time you move the cattle. I bet your ass would look mighty fine in some chaps.”

  His eyes glimmer with amusement. “Only if you agree to ride with me.”

  “Do you remember me ever riding a horse?”

  So not my thing. My parents weren’t in the same crowd as the Townsends, Henningtons, and Rooneys. My father was the town drunk, and Mama was always making excuses for him and doing God knows what with other men. Daddy tried to quit once, but then he lost his job at the stables. Instead of going out and finding another job, he decided to drink more and sleep all day. My childhood was the opposite of my friends.

  I didn’t have nights at the creek or long horseback rides. I had driving to the bar, helping Daddy in the car, and then going to pick up Mama from waitressing three towns over. Not to mention the fact that Rhett Hennington gave me a job at night cleaning stables so we could afford to eat. There was never any money for a horse in my life.

  Sad little poor girl with the crumbling house and a drunk for a father.

  No one ever said it to me, but I was side eyed a lot.

  “You know, I don’t remember all that much about you as a kid.” Cooper looks off and rubs his chin. “I know you were around, and we talked, but you never spent the night at the house, did you?”

  “There were never many sleepovers in my childhood. I didn’t spend all that much time around your house especially. Grace and I hung out here and there, but it wasn’t until after my daddy passed away that I started hanging out with Presley more.”

  A frown forms on his lips, and I have a feeling he’s remembering why now. “I forgot about that. I’m real sorry ’bout your dad.”

  “I’m not,” I say with no hesitation. “Good riddance.”

  Cooper looks down with surprise.

  “Don’t get me wrong, I loved my daddy just fine, but he didn’t make life easy on me or my mama. I didn’t enjoy workin’ at night on the farms just so we didn’t have the electric shut off.”

  “I never knew.” He stops walking and puts his arms around my hips. “Why didn’t any of
us know?”

  “I never wanted you to.”

  I became a professional at hiding things. I was lucky I had Grace and Cooper’s sister Presley as my friends. They would pass me clothes so I didn’t have to wear the tattered jeans and shirts that were falling apart. Since Grace was always in pageants, she was slipping me makeup and beauty products. I never looked poor, but I was.

  “It wouldn’t have mattered.”

  “No?” I challenge him. “I never had friends sleep over. Your mama and Grace’s wouldn’t let them. I didn’t have boyfriends because I wasn’t going to bring them home to meet my daddy, who probably would’ve been passed out anyway. I had Pres and Grace, but my best friend was my guitar and my notebook.”

  Music was the only way I could breathe. I wrote songs, learned how to play guitar, and sang my heartbreak out of my soul.

  “We didn’t have money like you think.” Cooper tries to soften whatever hurt he saw on my face.

  “Coop.” I touch his chest. “We weren’t just not-makin’-ends-meet kind of poor. We were getting bags of food from the Rooneys so I didn’t starve. I was shoveling shit at night after all the farmhands went home at the Hennington Horse Farm without anyone knowin’. I’m just a poor girl from a small town in Tennessee. It was the way my life was, and it was nothing like what you remember.”

  Cooper’s eyes fill with a mix of sadness and awe. “And look where you are today.”

  The awe wins out.

  His head dips, and his lips touch mine. When he pulls back, a small smile paints his face. “When I look at you, I don’t remember that. I just see the strong, beautiful girl that I can’t seem to look away from. I see long blonde hair, big blue eyes, and the sexiest woman I know. I see a girl who came from a going-nowhere town and is takin’ the music world by storm. You’re not your past. You’re not what you remember either.”

  My pulse quickens, and tears pool in my eyes. He has no idea how much what he just said means to me. I can’t stop myself even if I wanted to.

  I have to kiss him.

  I lean up on my toes, grip his head, and kiss him right in the middle of this park. I hold him to me, thanking him, needing him, wanting him with everything inside me. I’ve struggled my whole life with not thinking I was good enough for my friends. I wondered if any man would ever see past the trailer park and rumors of my family.

  When I pull back, Cooper grins. “What was that for?”

  “Bein’ you.”

  His hands glide up my back to tangle in my hair before he dips me low, pressing his mouth to mine. Cooper’s tongue glides against my lips, and I open to him. He kisses me hard and ardently.

  “Whooo hoo!” We hear people calling around us. “Hell yeah! Kiss her, man!”

  I turn my head and tuck against his chest with a giggle.

  Clapping and cheering happens from passersby.

  Cooper laughs and finally straightens, pulling me back up with him.

  “I’m so embarrassed,” I admit.

  He leans back and shakes his head. “I’m not. I’ve waited a long time to feel this way. To not give a shit about kissin’ a girl in the middle of wherever we are. To want nothing but to wrap my arms around her any chance I get. I’ve waited a long time for you, Emily. I’m not sure I’ll be able to let you go.”

  Fuck, fuck, fuck.

  I don’t want to lie and tell him I don’t feel exactly the same, but I can’t say the truth either. Not yet.

  I release a nervous laugh that I try to play off as cute. “Oh, umm,” I stammer. “You’re makin’ me blush.”

  Cooper’s smile falls, but he recovers quickly. His arm goes back around my shoulders, and we start to walk again. I try not to hear his words echo in my head, but I fail. I know this isn’t a typical boy-meets-girl situation. There’s history and a very established friendship, but I’ve never been tied down. That’s what has made this so easy. The traveling, recording, playing night after night in a bar. Being single has allowed me this life.

  I hate that I ruined what has been a really great morning. I need to fix it because Cooper doesn’t deserve it.

  I pull him over to the bench, and we sit. “I’m sorry,” I say with his hand in mine. “I got weird, and you don’t deserve that. It’s just that I like you. I’ve always liked you, but now, it’s different. I liked you in Bell Buckle, but we weren’t makin’ out in the center of town. It’s different, and we’re in two really different places—and states,” I tack on.

  “I’m not tryin’ to push you, but we’re not gettin’ any younger. I don’t want to look back on my life and wish anymore.”

  Cooper runs his thumb across the top of my hand, and I look off at the bronze cattle in front of us. “That’s your life, Coop. The farm, the family, Tennessee, but it’s not mine anymore. My life is music and traveling. I don’t know how long I’ll make it in this business. I’m not young and fresh. I can’t give you all my heart. Not now. Not when I’m living on borrowed time in the music industry.”

  He leans back and grins. “Well, I’ll just have to wait.”

  “Wait?”

  “Here’s the thing…” He moves close, giving me a glimpse into his heart. “I know what we have isn’t just one sided. I know what that looks like.” Cooper pauses, and I know he means with Grace. “You like me more than you want to. You like kissin’ me and touchin’ me, and we both know this is more than either of us is ready for. I’ve got the farm and you’ve got your music, but why the hell does that mean we can’t have each other? Who says you have to live in Bell Buckle for us to work? Who says you have to give up your career? Who says I have to? Why have you already decided a future that neither of us can see? So”—Cooper lifts my chin, forcing me to look him in the eye—“are you willing to wait?”

  My heart slams against my chest and my hands tingle. How has this happened to me so quickly? How has just two nights of being with him caused me to feel so much? It’s crazy and way too fast and so…right.

  “For how long? How long are you willing to wait?”

  He shakes his head, and his eyes are full of hope. “I don’t have the answer to that. I know that I’m willing to do what I can. Are you?”

  It’s not as if I’ve never wanted a man; I just wanted the right man. I saw no reason to waste my time on silly crushes because nothing was worth it. Now I’m sitting here with him and it feels like everything is new. The sun is brighter, the sky is bluer, and the world is more exciting because I’m seeing it for the first time.

  The words fall from my lips as my skin prickles. “I’ll wait. It’s only a month, and then, when I’m back in Tennessee, we can see what this is.”

  Cooper’s fingers touch my cheek, and he slides his hand back, cupping my face. “A few weeks and then you’ll fall in love with me.”

  If he only knew how I felt already. Last year, when he and Grace were no longer a possibility, I felt something. I thought it would go away, but it clearly hasn’t. Instead, it’s grown stronger than I ever imagined. There won’t be weeks. I’m pretty sure I’m already in love with him.

  Chapter Four

  My day with Cooper is magical. We spend it doing all kinds of tourist things like having lunch at the most amazing barbeque place and then standing on the grassy knoll where the alleged John F. Kennedy killer stood. Everything is perfect, and there isn’t any more talk about what we could be or what we already are, just light and fun.

  Until the sun starts to fall.

  Then we know that the time we’re enjoying is drifting away from us. When the sky moves from beautiful purples and blues to black, our spell is broken.

  “I should get back,” I say with my forehead resting against his.

  “You don’t want them to leave without you,” he agrees.

  Don’t I? I don’t want to leave Cooper.

  Which is fucking stupid and exactly what I am trying to avoid being.

  My fingers grip the sides of his flannel shirt, and I tug. “I don’t want to go.”

  He cu
ps my face, waiting until my eyes meet his. “I don’t want you to either, but you have a music world to conquer, and I’ve got an expo that I skipped out on today.”

  “Always the responsible one.” I rib him.

  “Not at all. If I could have my way, we’d be up in my room right now. I’d be kissin’ you and convincin’ you to stay with me.”

  My lips part, and I think about how much I want that. I want him—so much. “Coop.”

  “But it’s not right and not what I promised you.”

  I nod. “I hate bein’ right.”

  Cooper laughs and brings his lips to mine. “Go. Before I change my mind and lock you in my room.”

  I raise my brow and grin. He chuckles again, and this time, I lean up and kiss him hard, hoping to convey just how much I don’t want to leave. I would happily stay with him, learning more about the man who is quickly stealing my heart.

  Damn adult responsibilities.

  “Is it crazy that I miss you and I haven’t even left?” I ask and instantly wish I hadn’t.

  He’s been open and honest, though. He’s told me clearly how he feels, and as much as I hate being vulnerable, it’s just true. The fact that tomorrow I won’t see him makes me sad.

  “I think it would be crazy if you didn’t miss me. I’ve been told that I’m a catch.”

  I roll my eyes and grin. “Yes, I guess you’re lucky I’m so good at fishin’.”

  Cooper looks down at his watch and groans. “You gotta go, darlin’.”

  Darlin’.

  I’ve heard it my whole life. Daddy called Mama that, Zach called Presley it, and Lord knows, Southern boys love saying it when they’re trying to blow a girl’s skirt up. When Cooper says it like that, though, I could cry. Two syllables laced with so much emotion that it forces the word to take on a new meaning.

  It’s a song and a prayer.

  It’s a promise filled with hope.

  It’s a sign of something more between two old friends.

  If I don’t walk away now, I won’t go. My feet move back, and my fingers hold the fabric, letting it slip from their grasp. “I’ll call you.”

  He smiles. “I’ll be here.”