First Time: Ian's Story (First Time (Ian) Book 1)

by Abigail Barnette

  Our waitress, a lovely young Asian-American woman with short, highlighted red hair, took our orders. She tried to hide a wince of pain when she picked up our menus, and Carrie said, “Carpal tunnel?”

  “Yeah, I forgot my brace,” the girl said sheepishly.

  “I had surgery for that. Didn’t help.” Carrie sniffed. “Try acupuncture.”

  “Thanks. Well, I put in your orders, and I’ll be right back with some hot tea and your sake.”

  “You would get along with my girlfriend,” I told Carrie. “She believes in a lot of new age nonsense, too.”

  Carrie shook her head. “I hate to tell you, but our guests expect a full ‘new age nonsense’ spa in each of our properties.”

  There we were. Seamlessly shifting into the business portion of the evening. God, she was good at what she did.

  “Do they? Maybe it would behoove me to visit one, then.” I’m sure Carrie could afford to send a prospective contracted employee on a little working vacation, somewhere Penny could tag along and we could sip drinks in the sand.

  Carrie nodded. “So, you’ve given thought to my proposal, then.”

  “Thought, yes. I’ve looked at some of your other properties, and I do think I can see some opportunities to shake things up. But you have to remember, the closest I’ve come to resort design was a conference center with an attached hotel. My team isn’t used to working on guest experiences.” Was I trying to talk her out of hiring me? I supposed that would be the easiest route to making my decision, letting her make it for me.

  “You worked on that Catskills rehab when we were at Stafford,” she reminded me.

  “I’d forgotten all about that.” I hadn’t particularly enjoyed that project, but at the time it had been experience I had truly needed. There were some young guys and gals at the firm who would probably jump at this opportunity. “But what size property are we looking at?”

  “Our budget is three-point-four billion.”

  If we’d been eating already, I would have choked. “You’ve got to be kidding me. Carrie, we did a conference center outside of Boston for sixty-three million—”

  “Ian.” She sat up a little straighter. “I’m not a stupid person. I’ve been watching you for a few years now. You and I both know that Burt Baker isn’t going to take you guys anywhere. He’s happy where he is. I’m offering you the opportunity to make major money. We’re talking eight figures. This would take your firm to a level you were never going to attain drawing up Midtown office buildings and out-of-town conference centers.”

  “Exactly. We’re not on your level, Carrie. I couldn’t, in good conscience…with the people I have now…”

  “Hire new people. Do what you need to do.”

  The waitress returned to the table with our tea, and Carrie waited until she’d left again to say, “I’ve worked with you, Ian. And I’ve seen your recent work. I think you could do this. I have consultants and designers you’d be working with, and it’s a challenge. You do still like those, don’t you?”

  Ah, she had me there. I’d been so bored and frustrated at work lately, a drastic change might be what I needed. And that kind of money… I could provide a wonderful life for Penny, and for our children, should we have them.

  “I do like them,” I agreed. “Why don’t you tell me what you’d specifically like to see your property become.”

  As we ate our meal, Carrie outlined her issue with the current structure of her properties. They were mostly comprised of several hotel towers surrounding luxurious pools and lush outdoor spaces, predominately featuring sweeping ocean vistas; the new property wasn’t in Nassau proper but on a man-made island near it, allowing them three-hundred-and-sixty degree views. But she wasn’t looking for the overdone aquatic theme or the sterile sameness of her other resorts.

  I had to admit, the project made me curious, and not just because I wanted the money. It would be a challenge, and a good reason to hire some new talent.

  But could I really put a price on delaying my life with Penny? She wanted to have children within the next couple of years. That would be put on hold—a hold I couldn’t really afford, myself—unless she was willing to move to the Bahamas with me.

  “And we’re still talking about me relocating?” I clarified.

  She covered her mouth and swallowed. “Mmhm. Is that a problem?”

  “It…” I paused. I would have to bring this up with Penny. I couldn’t stall anymore. “I need to consider it a bit more. Can I have a week?”

  “Well, I’m still considering you, as well,” she said dryly. “I need to see at least some preliminary designs, so that I know we’re on the same page.”

  “Yeah,” I agreed. “I’ll draft a proposal, PDQ.” I didn’t know when I would find time to do so, but for eight figures, I would fit it into my schedule.

  We finished up our dinner, dollar signs still dancing in my mind. I couldn’t wait to tell Penny, though I did dread the possibility that she might not be so enthusiastic about running away to the tropics or putting our plans for a family on hold.

  My earlier wish to speak to Penny must have been more effective than I’d thought, because as Carrie and I walked to the door, Penny stepped in.

  “What are you doing here?” I felt faintly uneasy. Penny hadn’t… No, it was ridiculous to think she might have come looking for me. She seemed just as surprised to see me as I was to see her standing there.

  Penny put on a big smile that was so fake it wouldn’t have convinced me in total darkness. Oh no. After what had happened with Brad, this couldn’t look good. But she would understand, I was sure, once I explained it all.

  Her voice betrayed a slight tremble as she spoke. “I dropped off a wrist brace. Rosa’s girlfriend works here, and she left it at the apartment. In return, I got dinner.”

  “Oh, the carpal tunnel waitress,” Carrie said with a little laugh. “What a coincidence. Penny, was it? I’m Carrie Glynn.”

  “Glynn?” Penny repeated, taking the hand Carrie offered. “As in Glynn resorts?”

  “Guilty.” Carrie smiled her dazzling white smile.

  “This is my girlfriend, Penny,” I said, adding, “whom I was telling you about,” so Penny would know I wasn’t trying to be sneaky. “Penny, Carrie is an old friend I worked with in the 80’s.”

  “Ah.” She nodded in understanding but didn’t say anything else.

  “Well,” Carrie said after the pause in conversation. “I was just leaving. Ian, it was wonderful to see you again. Please, do give consideration to my offer. The sooner I have an answer, the better.”

  I shook her hand and she left. I turned to Penny.

  There was absolute murder in her eyes.

  Chapter Sixteen

  “I’m counting to ten,” Penny said, through what sounded like clenched teeth.

  “Pardon?”

  “I’m counting to ten before I run out of here. So, your ‘old friend’ doesn’t see.”

  “Or, you could come with me,” I suggested evenly. “I can give you a ride home, and you can tell me why you’re so angry.”

  “You want me to tell you why I’m angry?” She tilted her head, her lips pursed. “What if I canceled my plans with you for a ‘work dinner’ and it turned out to be with some hot billionaire I happened to be acquainted with?”

  “I think Sophie would rip your hair out at the roots,” I joked. Then, I realized how foolish it was to name drop a woman I’d slept with in my defense. “But there was no romancing going on tonight.”

  “Oh, please,” she hissed. “You’re an architect, Ian. You do office buildings. What, are you going to build Glynn world headquarters or something?”

  The disdain her voice rankled. Did she not think me capable of doing just that? She didn’t know anything about my work. It was such a low blow, and not like the Penny I thought I knew. “No, I was planning on designing a hotel. Like I told you before. Can we either discuss this in my car, or at another time? Because I don’t feel like having our first
argument in the lobby of a restaurant.”

  “Well, I didn’t feel like running into my boyfriend with a hotter, more age appropriate billionaire in the lobby of a restaurant, so maybe we don’t all get what we want,” she snapped, but she turned for the door, anyway.

  “Aren’t you supposed to drop off a brace?” I called after her.

  “I already did!”

  Time must have blipped forward or something, because I hadn’t seen her do anything of the sort since she’d come in, but I did have the good sense, at least, to not argue the point.

  It was biting cold. Penny walked with her head down and her arms folded; I didn’t dare put my arm around her, even to keep her warm. I worried I might pull back a bloodied stump.

  She didn’t speak the entire way to the car, and the silence didn’t improve once we were inside. I turned on the engine to get some heat going.

  “Are we going?” she asked.

  “I don’t want to fight and drive. Do I get a chance to explain here, or have you just decided that I’m stepping out on you?” I tried to keep the exasperation out of my tone.

  “You don’t have to talk to me like I’m a child, just because I’m angry,” she seethed. “How do you think it looks, you calling me and leaving a voicemail saying we can’t get together tonight because of work—which, by the way, I totally understand—and then you’re out with a woman, an ‘old friend’ who doesn’t even work in your field, let alone at your firm?”

  She had a point there. “I should have been more specific. It wasn’t business within the firm. Carrie is looking for a team to design her next resort. And because she knows me—”

  “How does she know you?” Penny interrupted.

  “She started in architecture. We worked together thirty years ago, and we’ve kept in touch on and off. It’s nothing sinister, I assure you.” I groaned and scrubbed a hand over my face. I could have told Penny that I’d slept with Carrie a few times and that it had been nothing serious, but there had to be a statute of limitations on disclosing past sex partners in an argument. “And I really don’t appreciate your condescension.”

  “When did I condescend?”

  “‘What, are you going to build Glynn world headquarters or something?’ Does that ring a bell? Because you said it about five minutes ago.” I tipped my head back and took a breath. I hated fighting. I’d already had enough of that to last a lifetime. Arguments were stressful, and they hurt. And this was Penny.

  I didn’t want to hurt Penny.

  “I’m sorry,” she said quietly. “That was…really uncalled for. I just… I was intimidated. And shocked. When you said you had a work thing, I was envisioning you and several other people, not you and one stunning blond.”

  “I would have much rather been with one particular stunning blond this evening, but I had to meet a potential client, instead.” I shook my head. “Have I ever done anything to indicate that you shouldn’t trust me?”

  She didn’t say anything but looked down at her hands, her face flushed, shoulders slumped.

  I wanted to feel vindicated that she couldn’t come up with an answer. I wasn’t that cheap. “I know that your last boyfriend did something horrible to you. And it’s perfectly natural that you’re suspicious. But I promise, there is no other woman on this planet that I want to be with more than you. I wouldn’t risk what we have for something as stupid as a one-night stand with Carrie Glynn, or anyone else.”

  “I wasn’t worried about a one-night stand.” She sniffed and raised her head, staring at the fogged windshield as though she could see through it to some bleak future outside. “Cheating is never about a one-night stand. It’s a symptom of a bigger problem.”

  “That’s a bit trite, isn’t it? What have you been reading?”

  My joke didn’t go over well. The set of her jaw hardened, and she looked at me, finally, but only to glare. “I’m not a child, Ian. Don’t treat me like one.”

  “I’m sorry. Now I’m the one who’s condescending,” I admitted. “Go on. You said you were intimidated. Why?”

  She sighed, her expression softening. “I just turned twenty-three a few weeks ago, Ian. I’m working at a job I got with a degree I didn’t want in the first place, I have practically no money, no idea of what’s going to happen in my future… I am the definition of not-having-your-shit-together. And you’re so… I mean, you have your own firm, you’ve accomplished things, you’re actually doing what you want to do—”

  “No, I’m not,” I corrected her. “I’m not doing what I wanted to do. I wanted to be an artist. I wanted to go ‘round Paris sleeping under bridges and sketching beautiful, tragic women in cafes. I never wanted to be an architect. It was just something I happened to be good at.”

  Her eyebrows drew together. “I forgot about that.”

  “Well, sometimes I do, as well. And believe me, that’s almost worse than knowing that I’ll never have that life. Forgetting your dream, that’s a hell of thing.” I wasn’t making this any better. “You’re worried that I would want to be with Carrie Glynn? Why? Because she has money?”

  “No. I mean, the money does figure in. But it’s more about the overall picture. The reason she has that money is because she’s confident and accomplished and successful. Literally everything I’m not.” She shrugged hopelessly.

  “Exactly. She’s everything you’re not,” I agreed. “Which is why I don’t want her. I want you, Penny. Not the opposite of you.”

  When she didn’t reply, I let my statement settle in the silence. After a long moment, I said, “You mentioned her age. Is that another thing…”

  “Yeah.” Penny nodded vehemently. “Yeah, your age is intimidating, and it’s something that I haven’t brought up before because… I don’t know. I’m afraid that I make you feel bad about being older than me. But you make me feel bad about being younger than you.”

  “Oh?” I couldn’t think of anything else I could say that wouldn’t come off as a challenge to her perception.

  “Yeah. You make these little comments all the time about how old you are in comparison to me. ‘My knees used to be able to do that,’ or ‘humor an old man.’ If I complain about something, you just brush it off with, ‘imagine how you’ll feel in thirty years.’ Why would you want to be with me, if I make you so self-conscious and self-critical?” Her breath trembled as she inhaled. “It just made sense to me, when I saw you with her. Wouldn’t you rather be with someone who doesn’t make you feel like Methuselah?”

  “I never said I felt like Methuselah, did I?” I asked then waved my hand. “No, I know that’s not the point. I—” All of the air went out of me. She was right. I had made all of those negative comments. They hadn’t seemed harmful, at the time, just self-effacing. “Penny, when I say those things… It’s because I’m intimidated. You’re so beautiful, and you have so much energy and optimism… I say those things because I feel dishonest if I don’t remind you that you can do better.”

  “I don’t want better,” she protested. “I want you.”

  I waited for her to make the connection, and laughed softly as I saw the understanding pass over her features. “You’re not out there looking for someone better. I’m not, either.”

  She nodded and looked straight forward, wiping her tears away almost angrily. “Just so you know, I didn’t follow you here. I really did have to drop off Amanda’s arm brace.”

  “I believe you. She was our waitress.”

  “I was just coming back in because I forgot the food she was bribing me with—” She paused. “Wait, was Carrie Glynn the woman who told her she should get acupuncture?”

  “Yeah, why?” Hopefully, the answer would lift the mood a little.

  Penny shook her head and smiled. “Nothing.”

  “Are we okay now?” I asked, wishing that I’d cleared my throat first.

  She turned to me and shook her head, as if she were dismissing some silliness that didn’t matter. “We’re okay. I’m embarrassed that I didn’t trust you
. But we’re okay, as long as you can forgive me.”

  “I’ve forgiven people for worse.” I leaned over the center console and cupped her jaw as I went in for a kiss.

  She laid a hand on my chest and met my mouth, her lips soft and sweet on mine.

  When we parted, I said, “All right. I haven’t been home yet, and I have to feed Ambrose. Do you want to come stay the night?”

  “Ah. You know…” She dipped her head. “I don’t want you to think you have to—”

  I put my hand on her arm gently. “Penny. Come home with me. Neither of us wants to be alone tonight.”

  “Sure,” she agreed, looking almost disappointed with herself.

  We went to her place, where I waited in the car while she grabbed her things. Then we drove back to my apartment, where I was confronted by a very angry Ambrose. I couldn’t tell who he was less pleased to see, me or Penny.

  As much as I would have loved to fuck away the memory of our first fight, Penny and I were both emotionally exhausted. She curled up beside me in my bed, which only felt right when she was in it, anyway, and laid her head on my shoulder.

  “I wish we hadn’t fought,” she murmured sleepily, her breath tickling my bare skin.

  “It was inevitable. And it was our first. We should celebrate.” I yawned. My eyelids weighed six tons apiece.

  “Well, I’ll pop the champagne.” She didn’t say anything else for a long time then she suddenly sat up, like someone had shocked her with a taser. “Oh my gosh! Ian, I’m such an asshole, I didn’t even ask you about the project!”

  She’d given me quite a fright, and it took me a moment to recover. “It’s the Bahamas project I mentioned before. You could stop someone’s heart doing that, you know?”

  “The one you would have to go away for?” She nibbled her bottom lip. “Are you going to take it?”

  “It looks as though I’ll have to. It’s…going to be a lot of money.” Did I sound like I was bragging?

  “So? That’s good, right? You’ll get a lot of money for your firm?” She shifted, the sheets falling away from her gorgeous breasts.