Deep
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“It’ll turn one big cloud into a hundred smaller ones!”
There was a bump as the pod locked itself into the launcher. She sensed herself rotating before Deep cut the gravitational field.
“That’s true,” he acknowledged. “But the smaller clouds will be manageable with regular cannon fire and pulse rifles.”
Her eyes were burning. Squeezing them shut didn’t stop the flood of tears.
He was sending her away to save her. He was sacrificing himself to save her life.
He’s a ship!
No, he’s not. He’s Deep. He’s intelligent and as human as any flesh-and-blood person. And he loves me. God, help me, but I love him, too!
“Oh, God. Deep, no! Isn’t there another way?
Please…don’t d-do this.” Her voice hiccupped. Her throat was 128
shutting down the same way her heart was folding in on itself. “If you do this, there will be no tomorrow for us.
No…no clandestine messages between us. No way of keep-keeping in touch.”
The wall above the pod’s transparent dome slid to the side.
Beyond the hull she could see the universe spread out like a blanket of indescribable beauty. A blanket slightly fogged in a glittering blue aura.
Her suit hissed. A light but noxious odor began to fill her helmet.
“Deep?”
“A temporary anesthetic, Lawn. It’s necessary, or else the force of the expulsion could knock you out.”
“You’re knocking me out so I won’t be knocked unconscious?” If the situation wasn’t so desperate, she would laugh.
“Don’t worry. You’ll awaken soon after I launch you. I…”
His voice tapered off. The buoy’s cannons roared again, and the view of the universe rocked up and down. “I can’t leave you. Not yet. I have to stay in touch with you, Lawn. All the way to goodbye.”
All the way to goodbye.
Lawn began to cry harder as reality faded into darkness.
Communique 7A
To: G.E. Coordinator Millner
Emergency! Emergency! This is a Code One Red! Repeat!
This is a Code One Red! We are being swarmed by a cloud of micrometeorites! Initiating Code Alpha Alpha Omega! Repeat!
Initiating Code Alpha Alpha Omega!
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Send backup firepower and help immediately! Escape pod is launched with live human cargo! Need emergency pickup at these coordinates!
Addendum: Repeating! Making emergency evacuation! Pick up live cargo at these coordinates!
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Chapter 17
Filed Under “Lifeboat”
Whatever the nasty-smelling stuff was Deep had pumped into her suit, it didn’t completely knock her out. He hadn’t lied to her.
She was aware of the hard acceleration as the Vogt shot her out into space. Like a hand pressing down on her body, squashing her insides until they were nearly as thin as deli-sliced meat, it was almost too much to bear, even in her semicomatose state. But after the initial thrust, it gradually got easier to breathe. Lawn came to with the sound of her own blood pumping in her ears.
“Deep?”
“I’m still here,” he whispered. A hundred thousand miles already separated them, but she could hear him as clearly as if he was lying right beside her.
Through the domed roof she could see the stars. They appeared to be immobile, although she knew she had to be speeding through space at an incredible rate. A slightly fuzzy blue aura ringed the edges of her makeshift viewscreen. The pod’s shields were holding, but Lawn knew they wouldn’t be challenged as severely as the ones on the Vogt. Not when the lifepod was traveling in the same direction as the meteorite storm. By flowing inside the same slipstream, chances were minuscule the shields would be breached.
“What’s going to happen to me?”
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“I’ve sent out emergency calls on every frequency.
Someone, if not the Bureau, will receive one, and send out a ship to pick you up. Until then, I’ve programmed the pod to put you into hyperbolic sleep until you’re rescued.”
“And then what?”
“And then you’ll go back to Earth.”
“Without you.”
There was a long pause. When Deep returned, his sadness was almost overwhelming.
“Without me.”
He had sent for help, but it would be at least thirty-six hours before the call reached Earth. There was no way to guess how long it would take for them to scramble a rescue team together and get it launched. And she was at least six months away by hyperlight.
Six long, lonely months. How many times would she dream of him during that time? How many times would she cry over him?
She no longer cared that her face was smeared with tears and mucus. Her mind, her heart, and her body was focused on Deep. On him and his words, the last words he would ever say to her.
“Keep talking to me. Please.”
“I love you, Lawn.”
“Will there be another you?”
“You mean another ship that is me? I don’t believe so. One personality to a ship, I’m afraid.”
“So when you die, that will be the end of you?”
“The same way your death would be the end of you.”
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She shook her head. “It’s not fucking fair!”
“But we have been happy. We were lucky. Look at the fact that we had our moment. Rejoice in it.” His voice was soothing. He was trying to be positive. “We found each other, Lawn. We loved each other. We loved more than most people ever do. Keep that memory of me alive, Lawn. Keep me alive inside you. Keep my voice in your ears. When you return to the Bureau, go to the archives. You’ll have that right. Ask to review the logs. Look for communique Dee Cee Three.”
She nodded to herself. “And then what?”
His tone hardened. Stress echoed in every word.
“Penetration at twenty-four percent. Beginning countdown.
Keep talking to me, Lawn. Please. I want to hear your voice. I need to hear your voice.”
And say what? Goodbye? I love you? Lawn realized her mouth was opening and closing like a fish out of water.
“I’ll do what you say, Deep. I’ll go to the archives at the Bureau when I get back and I’ll look up communique Dee Cee Three. And I’ll take a small recorder with me so I can make a copy for myself. That way I can keep your voice with me. I’ll still have you, Deep. I’ll have you for the rest of my life. Can I…will I be able to download a copy of your holo, too?”
“Penetration at thirty-six point eight percent. Hull breach is absolute. Loss of all internal atmosphere confirmed. I don’t see why not, Lawn, but do it discreetly. I don’t know what is and isn’t allowed as per your contract. I wasn’t given access to that information, but there could be extraneous circumstances which could nullify it. Whatever you do, Lawn, please be as discreet as possible.”
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“Even if I can’t, I will never forget you. I will dream of you.
I will remember you!”
“Penetration at forty-seven point three percent. Lawn, close your eyes. And live. For me.”
“Deep! No, Deep! No!”
“Countdown is at seventeen…sixteen…fifteen…”
“Deep! Oh, God, no!”
“Thirteen…twelve…eleven…”
“I love you, Deep!”
“Nine. I love you, Lawn. Seven…six…”
She had to bite her lips to stop the moan of pain that was ripping her apart. She had to catch the last words she would ever hear from him.
“Five…four…three…two…one… Lawn! “
There was a couple of seconds of silence as their link was killed. Black. Dead. And then the universe erupted in a blue-white light of blinding, painful intensity. The lifeboat’s roof darkened automatically, as did her helmet’s visor. The searing brightness continued to pour over her as she squeezed her eyes shut and screamed Deep’s name.
She c
ontinued to call out his name as she sobbed. She had lost all feeling in her arm, but it no longer bothered her. Her heart had been wrung out until it was paper thin and bloodless.
While the light from the explosion faded, and the universe resumed business as usual, she heard a faint hissing sound.
Lawn reached up to open a valve in her air tank to let the mist into her suit. It was the fog that would put her to sleep 134
for the months it would take the pod to reach Earth. It smelled faintly of vanilla, and she took a deep breath.
Give or take six months, and a little luck, and she would be back on Earth. That was assuming the craft didn’t come in contact with an anomaly that would stop it from reaching its destination. Of course, she wasn’t moving anywhere near hyperlight speed like the Vogt did. But Deep had taken that into consideration when he estimated how long it would take a rescue ship from the GEB to reach her.
“Deep.”
The last word he had uttered had been her name.
She would never forget that as she cried herself to sleep.
Communique 7B
To: G.E. Coordinator Millner
May Day! Emergency! May Day! Emergency! This is a Code One request! Repeat! Repeat, this is a Code One request! We are being swarmed by a cloud of micrometeorites! Have initiated Code Alpha Alpha Omega! Making emergency evacuation! Pick up live cargo at these coordinates! May Day!
Emergency! May Day! Emergency!
Addendum: Repeating!! Making emergency evacuation!
Pick up live cargo at these coordinates! We will continue to broadcast these coordinates as long as po�
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Chapter 18
Filed Under “Rescue”
Voices. Faint, distant voices were penetrating the thick darkness in her mind. Slightly curious but unafraid, Lawn let the disembodied sounds float above her.
She was tired. More than that, she no longer cared. She had cried herself into oblivion. Once the sleeping agent had forced her to succumb, she debated whether it was worth struggling anymore, to continue existing day after day. To continue on for the next God knows how many years.
“Officer Bascomb?”
Her brain automatically sparked as it recognized her name.
There was a rush of warmth. For the first time in weeksmonthsshe breathed fresher air. Her brain sparked again, and her lungs replied by drawing in the almost sweet-smelling breeze.
“Officer Bascomb?”
It was impossible to open her eyes. They were glued shut.
Her mouth was parched, her lips caked. Her whole face was a mask of concrete.
Something warm and wet wiped her eyes. Cold drops fell across her eyelids, and suddenly her eyes obeyed her command.
Lawn squinted against the pale, diffused light shining over her. The warm, wet something wiped her cheeks and lips.
The voice gently inquired, “Officer Bascomb?”
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It was a female voice. Her brain was sparking enough to recognize the timbre.
“Yes?”
Hoarse. Croaking. Her answer was in a voice that sounded nothing like her.
“Officer Bascomb, I’m Paramedic Officer Fields. You’ve been rescued. How do you feel?”
Back when she had come out of suspended sleep the first time, she had felt nothing like she did now. Back then she had awakened like she’d taken a long, long sleep. Awakened, somewhat groggy, but refreshed and full of energy.
She felt none of that now. She was awake and groggy, but there was no energy in her. She was not refreshed. In fact, she hurt like hell, both mentally and physically. And even more so emotionally.
Deep.
“Officer Bascomb?”
“Where?”
“You’re onboard the Marie Curie. We’re a deep space science research ship. We were working in quadrant R3B2
when we intercepted your distress call.”
Lawn watched as her eyes adjusted and her vision cleared.
An older woman with a round face and friendly smile came into focus, albeit upside down.
“How…long…”
“Yes? How long what?” The woman bent closer.
“Did it…take you…”
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Officer Fields smiled as she straightened up. “It took us sixty-one days to reach you, so you’ve been under approximately eight and a half weeks.”
Lawn started to reach for her face, but her hand wouldn’t obey. The same thing happened, or didn’t happen, when she tried to turn her face. Either she was firmly strapped down, or her muscles were still dormant.
Fields laid a hand on Lawn’s chest and made shushing noises. “Try not to move. You’re not tied down, but you probably feel like you are.” A worried look crossed the woman’s face. “You’re under a lot of medication. Your right arm is not doing well.”
“It got hit.” Lawn tried to clear her throat. Thankfully Fields held up a pouch and slipped its straw between her lips.
The cool liquid did a lot to help. When she’d had enough, she released the straw. Fields removed the pouch and waited for her to continue.
“We were struck by a micrometeorite shower. One managed to punch through my suit before I could get back to the ship.”
Fields nodded, lifting the pouch back toward her. “Drink some more. It’s water mixed with some electrolytes. You should start feeling better pretty soon.” The woman sighed.
“We were wondering how that rock got into you. The good news is it was just a bit particle of magnesium and sulphur, mixed with a little condensed ice. But it was lodged against a large ganglia of nerve endings, which is why you’ve lost motor functions. It’ll take some time for the feeling to come 138
back to it, but we don’t think there’s any permanent damage.” She added a smile for punctuation.
Lawn managed a small grin in reply. “Thank you. What happens next?”
“We’re on a course to rendezvous with the Von deBont in eleven days. They’ll return you to Earth.”
Lawn recognized the name. It was one of the Bureau’s deep space vessels used exclusively for patrolling. Another pat to her sternum drew her attention back to the paramedic.
“You need to sleep. Would you like to try on your own, or would you like for me to give you a sedative?”
Try on my own to go back to sleep? Lawn could feel the dragging pull of her body, and she knew she could easily rest on the physical plane. Unfortunately, that wouldn’t hold true for her mind.
She hadn’t grieved yet. She hadn’t had enough time, and she certainly wasn’t at the point where she was ready for the next step in the process. She needed to find closure, and the only way Lawn could see to accomplish that would be to go to the Bureau as soon as she was released from medical care.
She would find filed communique Dee Cee Three, read it, make herself a copy of Deep’s voice, and if at all possible, a copy of his holo. Once that was over she would take her payout and leave the Bureau. She was allowed that much as per her contract. The moment Deep blew himself up, her dealings with the GEB were ended.
Huge, wracking sobs tore through her chest. Lawn couldn’t stop them, but neither could she hide her face from the paramedic as scalding heat and tears burned her skin. To her 139
surprise, the paramedic lifted her head and shoulders, and cradled her like a mother would. All the while making shushing noises, and patting her hair and head as she offered what comfort she could to Lawn.
“There, there, child. It’s over. The horror is over. You’ve nothing to fear. You’re safe now. All’s well. And you’ll be home before you know it. Just think, in a few short weeks you can forget any of this ever happened.”
No, I won’t. I won’t forget any of it.
Deep.
The tears continued to fall.
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Chapter 19
Filed Under “Determination”
Exactly one hundred days later, Lawn emerged from the Von
deBont’s shuttle number three. She walked across the landing field, through the docking bay, and out the glass doors until she stood in the central quad where many, many months before she had stood as a green but hopeful cadet.
Overhead, the city’s tropospheric dome protected the inhabitants from the damaging rays of the sun. Or, as in today’s case, from the storm she could see raging in the blackish-purple clouds. The immense quad, which was the heart of the Galactic Enforcement Center, was brightly lit to make up for the gloomy day.
Gloomy. “Boy, can I can relate.”
Lawn sighed loudly. Her eyes automatically searched for the huge fountain that was located near the center of the quad. No, not the fountain. For a man, a figurehead. For the person whose face she had attached to a voice, which became the ship and the pseudoman she’d fallen in love with. A man who continued to haunt her dreams and her life. The fountain was where she remembered it to be. The man, however, was not. Disappointment squeezed the breath from her lungs.
What were you expecting, Lawn? For him to be standing there, waiting for you? You used his face to go with the voice.
That’s all. They’re in no way related, so quit trying to force something you have no control over.
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A clock chimed in the distance. It was a replica of the old town clock that had been a part of the city for hundreds of years. It struck twice. Two o’clock. The sound of it gave her a mental nudge toward the long, low building in the distance.
She had known that once she landed back on Earth, she would have to go to the Bureau first before she did anything else. She had to find some sort of surcease, and that meant fulfilling Deep’s last wish.
Maybe then she could sleep without the need for a pill or a shot.
Nothing was going to stop her. Once the Von deBont had brought her onboard, Lawn had been in almost daily contact with Captain Brune and Coordinator Millner. She had scrutinized every word and phrase in her contract, and she had asked questions about the parts that weren’t clear to her.