by Irene Brand
“Didn’t you talk to anyone about this?”
“Only to my roommate, Amelia Stone. She’s married now, to Chase Rause, and lives in Worthington, a few miles from here. We have lunch together occasionally, but we never discuss my crush on Allen. She knew how I felt, but perhaps she thinks I got over it.” She sighed. “Maybe to some people it seems silly, but to me it was very real. The love…and the pain. After that, somehow, everything just lost meaning.”
She avoided telling him of her second and worst romantic entanglement by saying, “I’ve been doing some soul searching, too, while you’ve been gone.” Briefly she recounted the days she had spent driving through the country trying to make some sense of her shallow life. “I know now that God hasn’t released me from the commitment I made years ago.”
Chad’s fingers tightened around Vicky’s hand which he was still holding.
“Don’t be too hard on yourself. It seems to me that every Christian is called to full-time service. Jesus doesn’t save us to warm a church pew on Sunday. The New Testament makes it plain that every believer has a service to perform—it might be on the mission field, in a flood-ravaged region, or in a hospital room at OSU Medical Center. I’m not sure I would have made it this far if you hadn’t gone out of your way to encourage my rehabilitation. You’ve helped me heal in a way I wouldn’t have dreamed possible when I first learned that I’d had a kidney transplant.”
Vicky experienced a profound pleasure and contentment at his words. “Thank you for confirming what I felt God wanted me to do. I thought He had given me the privilege of helping you as a way to deal with my own messed-up life. When I compared my problems to yours, they didn’t amount to much.”
“I’m not sure about that. I’ve not had the experience, but I’d imagine that a shattered romance could be very demoralizing.”
Chad saw the faint smile on her face fade to a brooding expression.
“To say the least,” she admitted wryly, wondering if she should go ahead right now and tell him about the situation with Damon. But his face held a hint of wonder and admiration as he looked at her, and still hurting from her mother’s cutting words, Vicky couldn’t destroy his trust in her.
“I’m considering returning to the actual place where I dedicated myself to Christian service and take up my cross there. I also need to apologize to my Mom and Dad for disregarding their wishes and causing them so much worry the past three years. But God hasn’t yet given me the grace to humble myself that much,” she said with some bitterness.
“You’ll have the strength to do what you know God wants you to do,” he encouraged. “Now that I’ve surrendered my future to God, I’m not sure what my next step will be. So let’s grow in faith together.”
Because she thought that a good way to end an almost-perfect evening, Vicky put aside the thought of telling Chad more than she had already told him. Perhaps she never would.
Chad left Vicky at her apartment, but instead of going home, he drove slowly through the quiet streets of the residential section of Columbus’s Victorian Village. He was puzzled by the strange feeling that came over him when Vicky had been talking about being in love. Was he jealous of the memory she still carried of Allen Chambers? Or did he resent the man for making her unhappy? He discarded that as an unreasonable thought, when the minister probably hadn’t had any idea that Vicky had a crush on him. But he didn’t like to see Vicky so distressed.
And he had a strange feeling that it was up to him to protect Vicky from being hurt again. How could he best do that? As her confidant and friend? Or as her husband? He knew that marrying someone to protect them was a poor reason for matrimony. Did he love her? And did she love him? Chad was still troubled when he parked his car and climbed the steps to his apartment.
Chad relaxed in Grace’s four-poster bed that was more comfortable than the one in the motor home—so short he had never been able to fully stretch out his long frame. He slept later than usual, showered and dressed. He hadn’t left any food in the refrigerator, and he’d forgotten to get groceries the night before. He made a cup of instant coffee, unlocked the door into the hallway and went downstairs, marveling at how much easier it was to negotiate the steps than when he had first rented the apartment.
He knocked on one of the doors. His landlady opened the door and the smell of fresh-baked bread floated into the hall. He hadn’t realized how hungry he was.
“Good morning, Grace. I’m back.”
She nodded. “I saw you come in yesterday afternoon. Come on in. I’ve got your breakfast ready. I was just going to call you.”
“Maybe I’ve already had breakfast,” he said, lifting his eyebrows inquiringly.
She answered his grin with a frown. “Humph! Have you?”
“No.”
“Just as I expected,” she said, smothering a smile as he followed her into the kitchen. Despite the fact that the room was large, it was one of the most cheerful places Chad had ever been.
A round table, covered with a blue-plaid tablecloth was in the center of the room. In one corner a lounge chair with a white afghan over the back faced a television. A sewing basket stood beside the chair, and a Bible was on the end table that held a reading lamp. Grace must spend most of her time in this room.
She placed a bowl of fresh fruit on the table and motioned for him to sit.
“I’ll boil a couple of eggs to go with the biscuits. I take it you watch your diet.”
“That’s right. Biscuits are only an occasional treat. But I don’t have to watch my diet this morning.”
“Now that you aren’t playing football, you don’t want to put on any fat. That’s apt to happen,” she warned.
“But I won’t,” he said, dipping into the fruit. “My father hasn’t gained weight, but he does work out, as I intend to do regularly now that my wound has healed.”
“I’ve had people come to the door looking for you.”
“I hoped no one would know where I’m living.”
“I sensed that, so I told them nothing, but I thought you should know.”
“It’s okay. I’m ready to come out of hiding anyway. My popularity won’t last very long. Soon people will transfer their interest to athletes who are still playing ball.”
Her eyes compassionate, she sat opposite him. “And you’re resigned to that?”
He hesitated slightly. “Yes, I am. I never did enjoy being in the limelight. I lived to play football, but I didn’t care for the notoriety. These two weeks I’ve been away have been good for me. I finally concluded that God has some other plan for my life rather than football. I’ve put my trust in the wisdom of God.”
She dipped a tea bag in a cup of hot water. “That’s the only way to live,” she said, “but I lived a long time before I finally learned that.”
“You’ve had your struggles, too?”
Her mouth tightened as if her memories weren’t pleasant. “Losing my husband nearly killed me. Even after my husband became bedridden, I absolutely would not let him die. I defied the doctor’s diagnosis, and knowing how I felt, my husband hung on to life long after he wanted to die. I finally realized that keeping him alive was for me, not for him. I was being selfish. I tried to explain that I’d released him into God’s hands. He died the next day.”
Grace swiped at the tears sliding down her cheeks and Chad was beside her in an instant. He knelt by her chair and put his arm around her trembling shoulders.
“And it’s the same way with this house. I’ve lived here alone for ten years, determined to keep my memories alive. My daughter has begged me to sell the place and come live near her and the grandchildren, but I refused. I’m a stubborn old woman.”
“Of course, you aren’t. Maybe God had you stay on here so you could give me a home when I needed a place to live.”
She patted his hand. “I wouldn’t mind selling out if I knew who was buying it, but if I put the property in the hands of a Realtor, I won’t have any control over what happens to it. I hate to th
ink of the home I shared with my husband belonging to someone who didn’t love and care for it as I do. I’d like to see it remain a home where people could live as a family.”
“I don’t know how to say this, but if you’re having a financial problem now, I’d be more than happy to help you.”
“You’ve already given me the boost I needed by leasing the apartment for six months.” She retrieved a handkerchief from her apron pocket and blew her nose. “I’m all right now. Go on and finish your breakfast.”
Chad stayed with Grace an hour or more, asking her questions about her husband and her family before he went to his apartment. In a further effort to deal with the present, he dialed his agent’s number.
“Man! Am I glad to hear from you,” Howie shouted, and Chad held the receiver away from his ear. “People have been driving me crazy—wanting to talk to you, wanting commitments from you, wanting to know where to reach you. But first, before we talk business—how are you?”
“Physically, I’m great. I still have a few emotional and spiritual hang-ups, but I’m mending. Thanks for being patient with me. I’m ready to talk now. I’ve got tons of mail that you should check through.”
“Are you coming back to Pittsburgh?”
“Not now, if ever. When can you come to Columbus?”
“Tomorrow, if I can get a flight. Call you back?”
“I’ll give you my new cell number. That’s the only phone I have right now.”
Chad met Howie at the airport the next afternoon and took him to the apartment. After the agent looked through all the mail that Chad had laid aside as important, he said, “Most of this is the same as the offers I’ve had. I suppose when I told them I didn’t know where you were, they tried to contact you directly.”
“I’ve already decided on things I definitely want to do, but I have questions about others. Let’s hear what’s number one on your list.
“You need to snap up in a hurry the offer to publish the story of your life. An athlete’s public is fickle. You’re still news now, but in a year you won’t be. Once you’re out of the limelight for a while, they’ll turn to new heroes.”
“I’ve accepted that, but I’m not sure I want a biography written.”
Howie shook his head, perplexed. “I can’t understand that! You have a great football record that started in high school. Why not publish a book about it? This company is also interested in movie rights on the book. They have a ghostwriter ready to hop on the project and they’ll push it through to quick publication. It will make you more money than anything else offered.”
“I don’t care anything about the money. I’m concerned about personal issues—things I’d prefer not to have aired to the public.”
“You know that unauthorized biographies can be published,” Howie warned.
“That’s a risk we’ll have to take. I won’t agree on it yet. But there are some things I want you to start working on right away, all of which will have to be approved by my accountant and lawyer. I want to establish a football scholarship at my alma mater, Wallace University, to aid underprivileged students who can’t afford tuition.”
He riffled through a pile of mail and pulled out an envelope. “I also want to invest a million dollars in this program designed to provide lifesaving vaccines to children in Third World countries. The information is included in this pamphlet.”
He handed the pamphlet to Howie and picked up two other letters. “And I will let my name be used to promote contributions to the Red Cross and Salvation Army. I’ll speak on their commercials if they want me to. You can take these letters from the two organizations to get the facts.”
During their three-year association, Chad had become adept at reading Howie’s reactions, and he knew his agent wasn’t pleased. None of the things Chad had mentioned so far would put much money in Howie’s pockets.
He fidgeted in his chair, scratched his head with his pen. “How about a half hour interview on the National Athletes network?”
“That I will do,” Chad agreed readily. “I’ll only be interviewed about my football career—they won’t be delving into my personal life. You can arrange it when you want to.”
“Will you go to the network’s studio in Chicago?”
“Yes.”
When Howie drew a sheaf of papers from his briefcase, Chad threw up his hands.
“Let’s take a rest. I’ve made about all the decisions I can make at one time.”
“When will you give me an answer on the book and movie?”
Chad didn’t like to be pressured, but he might as well make the decision and get it out of the way. “After the Christmas holidays.”
“That’s not soon enough but I’ll try to put the publisher off for that long. One other thing—you’ve been asked to endorse a new ointment designed to soothe and heal athletes’ aching muscles.”
“Have a sample of the ointment sent to me and to my lawyer. I’ll also want to see a copy of the type of promotion they plan to release.”
“Will you let me know about this endorsement before Christmas?” Howie asked hesitantly.
To see such meekness in his agent, whose nature was brusque and demanding amused Chad.
“I’ll try to do that.”
Chad’s face spread into his normal, friendly smile. “It will all work out, Howie. Let’s have dinner and then I’ll take you to your hotel. We can talk again tomorrow before you leave town.”
It bothered Chad that he wanted to talk to Perry and Lorene about his offers more than he did his parents. But if he allowed the story of his life to be published, he intended to tell everything and Lorene and Perry would be hurt more by that revelation than the Reeces. It was common knowledge that they had adopted him, but so far only a handful of people knew about his illegitimate birth.
Lorene answered his call, and he said, “Is Perry around? I want to talk to both of you at the same time.”
“Yes. He’s playing horse with Amy, but I’m sure he’s had enough of that. I’ll get him and let Amy entertain herself for a while.”
“Hi, Chad,” Perry said, and he was a bit breathless. “I don’t recommend waiting until you’re in your fifties to become a father. Keeping up with a toddler is for a young man—not me.”
“But admit you love it,” Chad said, fondly thinking of his baby sister.
“I don’t love crawling around on hands and knees and being kicked in the ribs by an exuberant toddler, but I love Amy and that makes it worthwhile.”
“How are you?” Lorene asked.
“The doctor says I’m doing great. I spent a couple of weeks doing a lot of walking in the forest, and I feel as strong as I did before the accident. I’m ready to make some decisions now, but I need your input since it will concern your past.”
“Whatever it is—we want what is good for you,” Perry said. “We owe you that.”
“I’ve been offered a deal with a major company to publish my biography, potentially with movie rights. I’m hesitant to do it because I couldn’t very well suppress details about my birth. I don’t want to ruin your reputations.”
A silence greeted his words, and instantly he was sorry that he hadn’t turned down the project.
“I won’t go any further if you’re opposed to it.”
“I was waiting for Perry to speak,” Lorene said, and there was a gentle softness in her tone. “I have no objection to having the truth come out. We made a mistake, which can’t be erased. But I’d be proud for the world to know that I’m your biological mother.”
“Ditto,” Perry agreed. “The circumstances of your birth shouldn’t be suppressed. It makes your story even more impressive because you triumphed in spite of your birth circumstances. Telling your story will encourage others who have similar problems.”
“As far as we’re concerned, go for it. Or are there other reasons you’re hesitating?”
“It’s going to put a lot more money in my pocket and I have trouble dealing with what I already have. Any advice?
”
“Perry, I’ll pass on that question and let you take it.”
“You might put all the income from the book and movie, if it’s made, into a separate account and ask God to tell you what to do with it.”
“I’ve been thinking along that line, too.” He mentioned the decisions he’d already made. “During the two weeks I was away, I put the past behind me as much as is humanly possible and promised my future to God. About the only thing He’s taught me so far is that trusting Him means that I have to walk by faith.”
“And no blueprint for the rest of your life?” Perry asked, and there was humor in his voice.
“Nope. Just one day at a time. I suspect that during this walk by faith, a lot of times I’ll wish for the days when I went from one football season to another—knowing months in advance where I’d be.”
“All of us would like that,” Lorene agreed huskily. “I had no idea when I was forced to go to Woodston, to fulfill a contract to publicize their bicentennial that I’d meet Perry again, that my life would make a complete turnaround, and we would have a new life together.”
“And you’ve never been sorry.”
“Never. In a year’s time, I had sold my company and became a wife and eventually a mother. That was God’s plan for me all along, but I took a detour that lasted twenty years.”
“If I agree to the book, when you come to Columbus in January, maybe we can agree on what we want published.”
“You have the right to know everything about your birth—and it’s up to you what you want to reveal. I’m all for it.”
“We’re looking forward to seeing you again,” Perry said.
“My landlady has a nice suite of rooms across the hall from my apartment. Her daughter’s family will be staying there over the Christmas holidays, but it might be good if you could rent those instead of going to a hotel. She could use the money and we would be close together. Incidentally I have a car now, so I can meet you at the airport.”
