Find Me Series (Book 3): Finding Hope

by Trish Marie Dawson

  “It’s from a car accident,” she mumbled.

  Her voice startled him, and though he wasn’t one to get flustered easily, he felt his face warm up. He snatched his hand off her calf, where his finger had been tracing the two-inch long scar without his realization.

  “I didn’t mean to wake you,” he said.

  The pillow slid off her head as she rolled over. “There’s probably half a dozen more where that one came from.”

  “Huh?”

  “Scars. From the accident.” She sat up and shoved her pillow behind her for support.

  “Oh. From before…or after all this?”

  She sighed. “After. This leg hasn’t really been the same since. Winchester patched me up as well as he could. We lost someone that day. Someone I cared about.”

  He watched her rub at her leg, as if remembering the pain from her past. He touched her knee. “Sorry.”

  “Drake. I need to see him.”

  With a sigh, he fell back onto his heels and pulled his hand away from her leg. The infamous Connor.

  “Yeah. I know.”

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  Z oey sat beside me on the front porch while the rest of the community ate their breakfast. We watched the rain fall in fat drops, leaving deep holes in the sand, the size of quarters. Her bushy eyebrows, just a tad sprinkled with white hairs, bounced from left to right every time her eyes moved. Like she was trying to track the rain. Poor dog had nothing better to do.

  Storms usually calmed me, refreshed me, but not this one. It had been two days since I found out that Connor was at the Ark, and for those entire forty-eight hours, I was unable to properly sleep, eat or think of much else. Because of my determination to see him, two guards were stationed between the community buildings and the outlining buildings, including the underground bunker that held the new arrivals. Keel was one of them.

  So while I considered my options, none of which included waiting three more weeks, I sat on the porch steps and watched the rain with the dog. A I was wearing only a long-sleeved Henley top and jeans, the moisture in the air seeped through my clothes and coated my skin in a chilly layer, but I ignored it by hugging my knees to my chest. Even Zoey seemed oblivious to the cold. She seemed to enjoy it, actually.

  “Are you going to sit out here all morning?”

  There was no reason to look up at the voice; I recognized it as Drake’s early morning gruff. “What else am I going to do? I can’t sit in there and chit-chat with the others like today’s just another morning.”

  He leaned against the railing nearby, with his hands in his jacket pockets. “Seems like just another morning to me. Well, instead of the snow from yesterday, we have rain today.”

  “You know what I mean.” I hugged my knees tighter.

  “Right. Your boyfriend’s here. And you’re dying to see him. Quite literally, especially if you don’t eat something. Or put on a damn coat.”

  I rolled my eyes. Then furrowed my brows in thought. Drake was right, but I wasn’t going to admit it to him at the moment. I was happy marinating in my depressive state. “Why are you out here?” I asked him, eager to change the subject.

  With a soft sigh, Drake leaned down and scratched Zoey on the head. “Just checking on you. Am I not allowed to do that, or is it breaking some sort of unspoken rule of yours?”

  “What does that mean?” With an irritated glance, I turned my face up toward his, which was closer than I thought it would be, since he was still leaning down to pet the dog.

  His laugh was dull and completely devoid of any trace of humor. “You said things wouldn’t be weird. And that we’d act like we always have with each other. But now…well, I think you’ve forgotten I might actually care about you. That we all do.” With a shrug, he stood up and stretched his back.

  With my eyes firmly set on his face, I watched him bend one way, then the other, as his spine popped loudly. “I am not having that discussion with you right now.”

  He paused to frown down at me. “Is this the part where you say something like, ‘It was a mistake…let’s just be friends…’ blah, blah, blah. If so, don’t. I’ve seen that movie.”

  It was my turn to stand, and I did it too fast, spooking Zoey. She scrambled up on all fours and blinked nervously out into the horizontal rain as if she’d missed some sort of approaching danger. I jerked on the cuffs of my shirt with my hands, and tucked them into my fists. “And what if I did say that? You going to run away and live on the top of some mountain all alone, just you and yourself to piss off?”

  In the poor light of the stormy day, it was hard to make out the emotion in Drake’s eyes, but it was there. I just couldn’t tell if it was anger or sorrow I saw before he looked away.

  “I have shit to do. I’ll see you around,” he said, stepping off the porch. The dog and I watched him until his form became nothing more than a blurry shadow.

  “I could have handled that better, huh?” I asked Zoey. She huffed softly, her way of answering.

  We left the porch as well, but walked in the opposite direction Drake had. I found myself on the dirt road, following the curve of it toward the Tank. Zoey dutifully walked at my side, water droplets coating her back and the top of her head, but she didn’t complain. Her eyes remained open so she could survey what little amount of our surroundings were visible in the rain, and she kept her tail tucked, alert as always.

  We saw the truck before we saw the bunker. Keel must have spotted us at the same time, because the door opened and he hopped out, pulling the brim of his cap down to block out some of the rain spray.

  “What the hell are you doing here?” he yelled over the roar of the storm.

  I stopped ten feet from him, judging the distance between his body and the bunker. He was armed, which was obvious from the bulge at the front of his waist. I was not.

  “I’m taking a walk,” I said. Which was true.

  “Not around here, you don’t.” He stepped forward a foot.

  The first tremble of cold ran up my back. It was as if my body was finally feeling the drop in temperature. I shook it off and squared my shoulders. Not willing to back down quickly.

  “I just want to look in the window. That won’t cause any harm, will it?” I was referring to the narrow slits along the top side of the bunker where the small library was. The windows wouldn't help me much if someone wasn’t actually in the library. But I had to look; the curiosity was going to kill me otherwise.

  “Nah, we don’t need you stirring up the newbies. Your boy sees ya, then he’ll want out, and then there will be a mess on my hands I’m not interested in cleaning up.” He inched closer, and I could see the water dripping off his nose. “Go back before you find yourself in trouble.”

  “With whom, you?” I laughed. “You don’t scare me. You’re all bark and no bite.” I knew it was a lie the moment I said it, but showing fear with a man like Keel would be a mistake.

  He moved closer, putting himself within striking distance. Zoey growled softly, but I doubted he heard the sound muffled in the downpour. “Oh, I can bite, little lady. You should be plenty scared of me. Things don’t end well for people that piss me off, remember that.”

  “Like your last scouting partner? Did he piss you off?” I wasn’t sure why I said it; perhaps the nagging question about what had happened had been lingering closer to my thoughts than I realized.

  Keel’s face hardened. His jaw clenched a few times, and then he smiled, baring all of his front teeth. “If that’s what people say, sure.”

  He was playing a game, holding his cards close to the vest so I wouldn’t guess his next move. That was okay with me. I had my own cards to play. “Fine. What do I need to do to get to that window?” I pointed at the berm behind him.

  His smile held as he rocked back on his heels a bit. “I don’t think you could afford what that would cost you.”

  “Try me.”

  I watched him hook his thumbs into his jacket pockets and circle around me. Zoey barked at him t
wice, her warning that she found Keel’s behavior threatening.

  “Not sure you have anything I’m interested in, at the moment,” he said. “Maybe another time.”

  * * *

  The entire way back to the Ark I cursed. Keel pissed me off on purpose, just to see me squirm miserably. As the buildings came into view again, I was arguing with myself when a man came at me from the right, a gun drawn and aimed at my head.

  “Whoa!” I yelled, and scrambled for a hold on Zoey’s collar. At the dog, I hissed, “You could have warned me.”

  “This area is currently off limits. What are you doing here?” he hollered over the rain.

  It seemed walking around the property outskirts wasn’t allowed, and not for just me. “I was taking the dog for a walk,” I said. Again, it was an accurate explanation for being outside. But without rain gear, dragging my dog through the storm for the sake of a little exercise didn’t make much sense to anyone.

  “Get back inside! There’s a community meeting in half an hour. You should be there,” he ordered.

  “Gee, thanks,” I grumbled.

  We stalked off toward our room, where I could put on dry clothes and leave Zoey indoors where it was warmer and dry. The lobby was empty when we made our way inside the main building, as was the elevator that led down to the living quarters. It appeared no one was in their rooms on our floor, and I quickly stripped out of my cold and wet clothes and into the thickest and warmest outfit I could find. I pulled on a coat and a hat and towel-dried off Zoey before leaving her under a blanket on the bunk. For the first time in two days, I was hungry and thirsty for something other than water.

  When I opened the door to step into the hallway, Winchester was standing on the other side with his hand up, as if ready to knock.

  He jumped back, startled. “Sorry, I thought I heard you moving around in here.”

  “It’s okay,” I said, pulling the suite door shut. “I’m on my way to this ‘community meeting’.”

  “Oh, so you know about it?” The concern on his face deepened and I got a whiff of antiseptic on his skin.

  “Yeah, one of the guards outside told me. How’s Connor?”

  His cheeks paled. “The Doc has been in twice to see the injured. Connor is stable, Riley. But he’s not out of danger. There is a tremendous risk of infection still, and it’ll be weeks, if not months, before the burns fully heal.” Immediately he sucked his lower lip in and cursed.

  “Burns? He’s been burned?” I grabbed Winchester by the arm. “How badly? Where?”

  “Riley, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.” He sighed, and looked up and down the hall. We remained alone.

  “It’s just us here, Win. Tell me what happened to him!”

  “Fine, relax!” Winchester stiffened and I reluctantly loosened my hold on his arm. “Look, he has 2nd and 3rd degree burns across half of his torso. They’re bad but treatable, the Doctor says. All I can do is prepare more bandages. I don’t know much about burns, which makes me pretty helpless right now. I’m just as frustrated as you are, Riley. I can’t get in there either. Only the Doc. And only once a day. If anything happens while he’s not there, well…” Winchester’s voice trailed off and I felt my heart rate slow.

  “They’d just let them die? The ones who are injured?”

  “This isn’t a hospital, Riley. We’re already running out of supplies treating just the three that are injured. And that’s only their medical supplies. We used half the gauze stock already. The others need resources too. They all have to eat, right? Anyway, it might be better that you have to wait to see him. There’s nothing you can do right now. You’d just go crazy if you were in there with him.” He looked sad for a moment, then straightened his back like he had more bad news to tell me. “Connor’s important. I know. But that’s not why I’m here,” he said.

  “Great. So, what’s happened now? Is it Kris?” My mind whirled like a tornado, and I found it impossible to focus on anything without Connor’s face popping up. We stood at the base of the stairwell and Winchester glanced up the first flight, and didn’t speak until he seemed certain we were alone.

  “Look,” he started. “You should probably hear this from me first.” He was nervous, more nervous than I’d seen him in a long time. And maybe afraid of something.

  “Okay, Win. Now you have me worried. If I’m in trouble for taking a damn walk around the property, they can ground me.” It was meant as a joke, but he didn’t laugh.

  He grabbed at my elbow and began leading me toward the elevator. There was an urgency in his voice when he spoke, and his voice was low so only I could hear him. “No, it’s nothing to do with you. I mean, not directly. Riley, there was a murder here earlier. And for some reason the leaders are looking for Drake. He’s missing.”

  * * *

  Drake wasn’t pleasant to people he didn’t know. In fact, Drake could be an asshat to anyone who looked at him sideways, but he was loyal and caring once his trust had been earned. It was no secret in our little group that he’d killed before. But a murderer? That wasn’t Drake. He’d only take someone down if they were a threat. And the forty-one-year-old woman who had been found stuffed inside the compost bin that was just behind the community building kitchen was not a threat.

  “This is absurd,” I snapped at Ryder. He was pacing from one end of the kitchen to the other, with two other leaders standing in the corner, talking in hushed tones.

  “Ms. Curtis, the woman who loads up the buffet for breakfast? She swore she saw your friend, Drake, speaking with the deceased this morning after clean up.”

  “Speaking with the deceased. Really?” Ryder was either trying to sound more official, or was dropping major hints about what he did before the plague. An image of him crammed inside a closet-sized office pushing papers for his local mortuary or coroner came to mind, and I almost laughed at him.

  “Well, that’s what she is, Riley. She’s dead. Poor woman had her throat slit from ear to ear. And…well, looks like something else might have happened to her. But I’m no Doctor.” He cleared his throat to steady his voice and glanced at the other two people in the room, who were still talking.

  Probably didn’t work for the coroner, then. “What was her name?” I asked.

  “Her name? Oh. It was Ms. Justine.”

  I shook my head. “Never met a Justine, that I remember. Drake’s never mentioned her name. Plus, he’s not someone who would do this. It’s not his…way.”

  A woman spoke at my back. “And what would his way of killing be, exactly?”

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  They refused to let me leave the stainless steel kitchen until I responded to more questions than I realized I had answers for. And no one had yet seen Drake. What promised to be a cold and brutal night was quickly approaching. Because of the clouds, it already looked like evening, but it was still afternoon when I finally headed back outside. People weren’t wandering the grounds, not in the severe weather. But shadowy figures danced around in the rain, occasionally taking on an almost human form. I knew better than to assume those shapes were completely harmless.

  “Psst.”

  I glanced to my right, expecting to see a bird perched on the porch railing. Instead, I saw Kris huddled in her overcoat, with the hood pulled half-way down her face. She waved at me once, then ducked back around the corner of the building.

  Casually, so as not to draw attention in case anyone was watching me from inside, I stepped off the porch and moved to my right, staring straight ahead. I walked past the building, directly into the rain until I couldn’t see the ground in front of me. When Kris caught up, she hugged me from behind.

  “Hey,” she said as loudly as she could without yelling. “Is it true?”

  “Is what true?” I resisted the urge to cup my hands around my mouth. Even though we were hidden in the storm from view, it didn’t mean our voices couldn’t carry back to the community structures.

  “About Drake? Do they really think he killed someon
e?” she asked.

  I nodded, then realized she probably wouldn’t notice with the rain pelting down onto the tops of our heads. “Yeah. He didn’t do it, Kris.”

  With an exasperated shrug, she threw her hands up in the air. “I know that!”

  “Do you know where he is?” I asked, stopping next to a patch of weeds. It had become harder to walk, since my wet jeans were plastered to my thighs.

  “No, he stalked off all pissed this morning. At you, probably. What happened, anyway?”

  “I don’t want to talk about it,” I mumbled.

  “Huh?” she shouted.

  “Nothing. Just had a difference of opinion, is all,” I said back.

  For a minute we stood in the rain, our bodies fully soaked, unsure of what to say or do next. I could go back to the room and wait for Drake there, but he wouldn’t be able to get down to our bunk without walking through the lobby first, which meant someone would definitely see him if they were bothering to look.

  “So, now what?” Kris asked.

  “Today is turning into one bitch of a day.” I sighed, then sucked my air back in. A shiver vibrated through my lungs and immediately I coughed. “We should be inside where it’s dry and warm. Last thing we need is to get pneumonia.”

  She followed me back along our makeshift foot trail to the compound, but half-way there, the rain had washed away any semblance of a trail to be seen, and we ended up making a wide arc around the gardens. I didn’t know where we were at first, when a water tank came into view. Kris tugged on my arm to pull me around the backside of the building but I stopped at the narrow metal stair case that led up to one of the gardens.