Shy Queen in the Royal Spotlight

by Natalie Anderson

  ‘Because you’re a tease.’

  ‘Yeah? Perhaps. But that doesn’t mean I don’t mean it.’ His hand tightened around her wrist. ‘Your pulse is quickening.’

  ‘It’s terror,’ she muttered.

  ‘Liar.’ He grinned.

  ‘You’re so conceited.’

  ‘Maybe because you’ve mastered the art of looking at me so adoringly...’ He chuckled as she flicked her wrist free of his hold.

  ‘Don’t we have to go on this visit now?’ She pushed herself back into work mode.

  ‘In an hour, yes.’ He leaned closer. ‘That’s just enough time for—’

  ‘Me to get changed, that’s right.’ She all but ran back to her apartment to where her stylists were waiting.

  * * *

  ‘You’re nervous?’ Alek glanced at her keenly as the car drove them out of the palace gates and through the banks and banks of cameras just over an hour later.

  ‘Is it really obvious?’ She worried even more and clutched her bag strap tightly.

  ‘Honestly, I imagine everyone would expect you to be nervous and it’s not a bad thing. People like to see the humanity in others.’ He reached for her hand and shot her that charming smile.

  ‘They forgive you your sins?’ She tried to answer lightly, but beneath it she was glad of the way he rubbed his thumb back and forth over her tense fingers. It was soothing, like when she counted her breathing. But better.

  But bad too. Because she didn’t want him to stop.

  ‘Nerves aren’t a sin.’ He laughed. ‘They’re normal. Everyone has them.’

  ‘Even you?’

  ‘Even me.’ He gave an exaggerated nod. ‘Does it surprise you that I might feel normal things, Hester?’

  That sense of danger as those undercurrents of heat and temptation swirled too close to the surface.

  ‘So this is the paediatric ward visit,’ she confirmed needlessly. Just to remember the job. Just to stop staring at him. Since when was she so seduced by physical beauty? She’d always tried not to judge people based on their appearance—she knew how it felt to be bullied about things.

  ‘You don’t think it’s cynical to use sick children to sell us as a couple?’ she asked.

  ‘I think that most of these little guys have a really rough road ahead of them, so why shouldn’t they get a little joy out of this? I’d far rather spend an hour with them than with some of the captains of industry who don’t think I can live up to my father’s legacy.’

  ‘You think people don’t take you seriously?’

  ‘I’m just the Playboy Prince, aren’t I?’

  ‘Wow, I wonder why they have reason to think that?’

  ‘I know, right?’ He sent her a mocking look. ‘If only they knew I now have a pure and innocent bride to mend me of my disreputable ways...’

  ‘Very funny.’

  Except she was revising her opinion on his reputation. It hadn’t taken long to see that Alek considered his country and his people in almost every decision he made.

  It seemed there were thousands waiting behind police-guarded barriers and every one held a camera or phone up. As she passed them she was terribly glad of her long dress and the firmness with which her hair was pinned. Alek released her hand so they could engage with the people in the receiving line and she received a small bouquet from a sweet young girl. She heard a child bellowing and glanced quickly to see a small boy being carried away by a nurse but she maintained her smile and pretended she hadn’t noticed. There was no need to draw attention to someone else’s sensory overload.

  Alek compelled attention like a black hole, sucking everyone, everything—all the light—into his vortex and onwards he spun, ever more powerful. But she also felt the people watching her, assessing, judging—she could only hope she passed. After a tour of the ward, they spent some time in the hospital classroom where a few children sat at tables working on drawings. At a table near the back, she could see the small boy who’d been hurried away at their arrival. With the ‘freedom’ to walk around, Hester gravitated towards where he was, subdued and firmly under the control of the teacher standing beside him. Belligerent sadness dimmed his eyes. Hester didn’t make eye contact with the teacher, she just took the empty chair at his table. She drew a piece of paper towards her and selected a pencil to colour in with. The boy paused his own colouring to watch her work then resumed his until they reached for the same emerald pencil.

  ‘I think it’s a really nice colour,’ she said softly, encouraging the boy to take it.

  ‘It’s my favourite,’ he muttered.

  ‘Mine too,’ she whispered with a conspiratorial smile. ‘But don’t tell anyone.’

  She glanced up and encountered Alek’s inscrutable gaze. She’d not realised he was nearby.

  ‘Time for us to leave, Hester,’ he bent and said quietly. ‘But we’ll come back again.’

  As they were driven back to the palace he turned in his seat to study her face. She was sure it was only for all those cameras along the route.

  ‘You did very well. Again,’ he said.

  She inclined her head with exaggerated regal poise to accept the compliment.

  He suddenly laughed and picked up her hand, playing with the ring on her finger in an intolerably sweet gesture. ‘I mean it. Being able to make someone smile or respond—to make a connection like with that boy who’d been distressed?’ Alek nodded. ‘That was skilled.’

  ‘Not skilled.’ Hester shook her head. ‘I had no clue. I just tried to give him the time to let him get himself together.’

  ‘Natural kindness, then.’ Alek ignored the photographers calling outside the car as it slowly cruised through the crowd. ‘You told him your favourite colour. Or was that just a lie to make him feel good?’

  She paused. ‘It was the truth.’

  ‘So you could tell him something you couldn’t tell me?’

  She paused, startled by the soft bite in that query. ‘Have I hurt your feelings?’ She tried to deflect him with a smile.

  ‘Yes.’

  She shot him a worried glance. Surely he was joking? He intently watched her—not smiling, not glowering either.

  ‘I just wanted to be kind to him.’ She drew in a breath. ‘Some people get all the attention, right? The loud ones, or the ones confident enough to smile and call out, and the ones who have the tantrums like him. The ones I feel bad for are the quiet ones—who don’t push forward or act out, who are so busy being good or polite or scared...sometimes they need to know someone has seen them and I didn’t today.’

  ‘I did,’ he said softly. ‘I went around and saw some of those ones.’

  Of course he had—because he’d been doing it all his life. Sharing his attention.

  ‘Were you one of those kids?’ he asked. ‘One who was being so good she became invisible?’

  ‘Good but not good enough?’ She wouldn’t have minded being that kid. ‘No, that wasn’t me.’

  ‘I can’t see you confidently calling out things in front of everyone.’

  ‘No, not that one either.’

  ‘Tantrums?’ He lifted an eyebrow and sent her a sideways smile. ‘No? But what else is there?’

  In the safety of the car, riding on the success of her morning and the fact the worst of today was now over, she was relaxed enough actually to answer. ‘I was the kid who ran away.’

  He watched her. ‘You really mean it.’

  ‘I really do.’ She drew in a slightly jagged breath, regretting the confession.

  ‘Did they find you and bring you home again?’

  ‘They had to,’ she replied lowly. ‘I was young and they had an image to maintain. But that didn’t stop me trying again.’

  ‘Did you ever succeed in running away for good?’

  ‘Eventually, yes.’

  She wanted to
gaze out of the window. She wanted to end this conversation. But his coal-black eyes were so full of questions that she couldn’t answer and so full of compassion that she didn’t have the strength to pull back from him either.

  ‘Will you run away if you don’t like it here?’ he asked.

  ‘No. I’m grown up now and I’ll see this through.’ She made herself smile and clear the intensity. ‘I think it’s more likely that you’ll banish me like your ancestor did his rebel Queen.’

  To her relief, he followed her lead and laughed. ‘I have to banish you to her castle. I’ll take you after dinner. It’ll be a dark-windowed car tonight. Tomorrow is the glass carriage.’

  ‘The fairy-tale element?’

  ‘Absolutely.’

  * * *

  After another dinner devoted to preparation and planning, this time with several advisors attending and in which Alek refused to release her hand, they were driven to the castle on the edge of the city for Hester’s final night as a single woman.

  ‘Welcome to Queen Aleksandrina’s home.’ Alek spread his arms wide as the enormous wooden doors were closed behind them.

  Hester knew the story of Aleksandrina well. Her marriage had taken place after the King’s coronation and was such an unmitigated disaster that a law had been passed stipulating that any future prince could not claim the King’s throne before being married. Furthermore, at the King’s coronation, his bride must bow before him—before all his other subjects did; she was to be prime symbol of deference to his rule. It was appalling, but ‘tradition’.

  ‘The rebel Queen who defied her husband and decided to build her own castle at the other end of town?’ Hester nodded in approval. ‘She sounds amazing.’

  Alek grinned. ‘You know I’m named after her?’

  ‘Really?’ That surprised her. She’d thought the rebel Queen was frowned upon. ‘And you don’t want to live here?’

  She hoisted her little backpack on her shoulder and gazed up in awe at the carved constellations in the vaulted ceiling of the castle’s great room. Where the palace was gilded and gleaming, the castle was hand-carved curves and lush plantings. It was softer somehow and very feminine. Carved into the coastline, it had a wild element to it; part of it actually overhung a cliff.

  ‘There’s a tunnel to the beach below. I’ll show you.’ He grinned at her. ‘The rumour was it was how the Queen smuggled her lovers in without the King knowing.’

  ‘Lovers—plural?’

  ‘Apparently she was insatiable.’

  ‘And did you say you’re named after her?’ Hester clarified a little too meekly.

  He chuckled. ‘My mother always said those rumours were just slut-shaming to steal her powerful legacy from her. The fact was she was a better queen than he was a king and he couldn’t handle it.’

  Hester stilled at the mention of his mother. She sensed she was an off-limits subject and Hester of all people understood the desire to protect those precious memories. ‘It sounds like your mother was quite a woman too,’ she said lightly.

  ‘She was.’ He turned and headed towards a doorway. ‘Come to the ballroom.’

  Yes, he wasn’t about to elaborate and Hester didn’t blame him. ‘This isn’t the ballroom?’

  Two minutes later Hester gazed around the vast, ornate room, uttered moved by gorgeous wooden carvings and low-hanging candelabra. ‘I...wow... I just...’ She trailed off; her throat was too tight. It was so incredible.

  Alek stepped in front of her and brushed her cheek with his hand as he gazed into her eyes. ‘You really do struggle to express yourself sometimes, don’t you?’

  Of course, he saw that. Somehow he was right there, too close. Making her want...too much. Everything she felt around him was too strong and so easily he weakened the bonds with which she held herself together.

  His hand on her waist was so light, so gentle, she couldn’t quite be sure it was even there. But the electricity racing along her veins confirmed it. ‘What are—?’

  ‘Practising for our first dance,’ he answered before she’d even finished asking.

  ‘You’re kidding—we have to dance?’ She groaned. ‘I can’t dance, Alek. I don’t know how to.’

  ‘Just relax and follow my lead.’ His dimples appeared. ‘It’ll be fine.’

  She put her hand on his chest, keeping him at that distance as he stepped fractionally closer. But the tips of her fingers burned with the temptation to spread, to stroke. And they weren’t dancing at all, they were standing still as still, close but not breathing, not blinking either. Somehow time evaporated. Somehow he was nearer still and she’d got lost in the depths of his dark eyes and the current of his energy coiling around her.

  ‘Why try to fight it?’ he whispered.

  Of course he knew, of course he saw the terrible yearning within her. But self-preservation made her deny it. ‘Fight what?’

  ‘The inevitable.’

  ‘I refuse to be inevitable,’ she muttered hoarsely, her instinctive self-preservation instincts kicking in.

  ‘There’s a saying for that,’ he countered with a smile. ‘Cutting off your nose to spite your face.’

  ‘You think I’m missing out on something amazing just because I won’t fall for your flirting?’

  ‘I think it’s interesting that you’re making it such a big deal.’

  ‘Maybe I want something meaningful.’

  ‘You think I don’t mean it?’ A frown entered his eyes. ‘Because I do. There’s something about you...you’re growing on me, Hester.’

  ‘Like a kind of bacteria? Fungus?’

  ‘Not fungus.’ Beneath her fingertips she felt the laughter rumble in his broad chest. ‘Are you trying to put me off?’

  ‘You know I am.’

  ‘I do.’ He shot her a look. ‘And I love that you feel the need to try so hard. It makes me think I’m getting beneath that prickly shell of yours.’

  ‘So now I’m a porcupine? And here I was thinking you were supposed to be impossibly charming and irresistible.’

  ‘You know what I think? I think you’ve decided I’m some big, bad philanderer. And that makes me terrible, for some reason. Sorry for liking sex, sweetheart. Maybe if you tried it, you’d discover it’s not so awful. But instead you feel you have to keep me at a distance and not explore the fact that we have quite spectacular chemistry.’ He leaned closer. ‘Sparks, Hester. Every time we touch. Every time we even see each other.’

  She ducked her gaze. ‘I just don’t think it’s wise for us to blur the boundaries. We have a contract. That’s all.’

  ‘A contract that contains two kisses.’ He smiled happily.

  Something swooped low in her belly. ‘Only two.’ And they were both going to be in public so it wasn’t as if they were going to develop into anything out of control.

  ‘But you’re a lot more fun to be around than I imagined you’d be, Hester.’

  ‘I’m so glad, given I live to please you, my lord.’

  He laughed and lightly tapped her on the nose. ‘Call me Alek.’ He leaned closer and breathed, ‘Always.’

  Her smile faded. She wished he wouldn’t get like this—the combination of playful and serious that was so seductive it shut down her brain and made those dormant secret parts of her roar to life.

  ‘I...don’t—’ She broke off as a shiver ran down her spine. She stepped back, seeking distance from his intensity.

  He stayed where he was, studying her intently. ‘Are you afraid of me?’

  ‘Surprisingly, no.’ She was too shaken to lie. She didn’t fear him so much as how she felt when he was near.

  ‘So you’re worried about...?’ A frown knitted his brows.

  It was easier to talk about everything else other than the riot of emotion he invoked within her. ‘The press, the Internet trolls.’

  ‘You’re such
a liar, Hester. No, you’re not. You never would have put yourself in their firing line if you really were. Tell me the real reason.’

  ‘Words can hurt,’ she argued.

  ‘Maybe. Sometimes.’ He nodded. ‘Depending on who’s doing the talking, right?’

  He was very right. And now her voice was stolen by memories she had no wish to recall.

  The teasing light in his eyes dimmed and he stepped closer. ‘You can tell me,’ he assured her quietly. ‘I know you’re prickly, you won’t believe even the littlest of honest compliments. I know you don’t let many people into your life.’ He paused. ‘I know this is an arrangement. I know I’m effectively paying for your company. And I know I tease you...but you can trust me. I hope that you might be able to trust me enough to be able to tell me why you’ve built such high barriers.’

  She knew she shouldn’t let the past constrain her future. And even though she had no real future with him, there was here and now. And she didn’t want to lie to him any more. ‘Because I’ve had my trust broken before.’

  He waited, watching her. She knew she didn’t have to explain it to him if she really didn’t want to, but he was patient and quiet and somehow compelling.

  ‘You’re right,’ she growled. ‘I’m not really worried about the cameras or all the crowds or the online commentators. It’s my three cousins.’ She breathed out. ‘I shouldn’t have invited them.’

  ‘You don’t see them much?’

  ‘I haven’t seen them in years.’ She didn’t want to tell him how weak and vulnerable she’d been. And it wasn’t all their fault, right? She probably hadn’t made enough effort and they couldn’t understand her and it had been too easy for her to shut down.

  ‘I know no one is perfect, but they pretty much are.’ She glanced at him quickly, offering superficial detail. ‘And I wasn’t. I was like a troll in the elven realm. They were a party of extroverted sporting elite. I liked reading in the corner. We just couldn’t relate.’

  He blinked, his expression perplexed. ‘But how did they break your trust?’