Broken

by Drea Blackery

The reason for that became apparent to me when we entered the restaurant. The back of it opened out into a large lake; this place used to be a boathouse.

  Karin quickly gave our orders to the waiter and settled into her chair eagerly. “Nice, isn't it? I've always wanted to come here.”

  I had to admit, it was. “You've never been here?”

  “Nope, it's my first time too, but trust me, this place has amazing reviews…”

  The ambiance here was different from the fast-paced bustle of New York, and the food turned out to be good. I found myself relaxing as the meal went on.

  Karin gave a satisfied sigh as she polished off the last of her breakfast eggs. “That was nice.” She settled back in her chair, cracking an eyelid open. “Are we going Dutch? I don’t mind—”

  “It’s a date, Karin. I’m paying.”

  She bit her lip, looking shyly pleased. “Okay.”

  But instead of leaving the place after our breakfast, Karin took me out to the back.

  “So that was a great meal,” she chatted, “but not exactly what I had in mind for the main event. It’s this. Behold.”

  I stared past her outstretched arms at the rows of wooden boats lining the harbor I’d somehow missed earlier.

  “Absolutely. Fucking. Not.”

  “But it’ll be romantic!”

  “Karin, be reasonable. These aren’t motorized. They have oars, and I’m wearing a jacket.”

  “Well then, take it off.” She said it like it was the most reasonable thing in the world.

  I stared at the rows of boats again in growing disbelief.

  Bloody hell. I was actually doing this.

  Shedding my coat, I handed it to Karin, returning her grin with a narrowed look. I folded up my shirtsleeves and paid the money to the attendant.

  Then we settled in the boat, which was small but thankfully sturdy.

  “It’s fucking freezing, in case you’re wondering.”

  “Well then, I guess you better start rowing,” Karin said demurely.

  She lay against the stern as we went out on the water, her hands spread-eagled and trailing on the surface of the lake.

  “This is so romantic,” she groaned dramatically at the sky. “I love it.”

  “At least one of us does,” I muttered. But I was pleased that she was so clearly enjoying herself.

  “I used to pretend I was Ariel, you know,” she sighed. “She’s short, I’m short. She’s got red hair, I’ve got red hair… ish.”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

  “The Little Mermaid? There’s this scene where the prince takes her out to the lake on a boat.” Her voice was dreamy and breathless. “She was wearing a blue dress just like me now, and he’s falling in love with her. On the lake, he leans in and…”

  “Fucks her?” I guessed.

  “It’s Disney!” Karin popped her head up and scowled at me from across the boat. “You’re doing this on purpose.”

  “Personally, I don’t see the similarities. It’s not night time, and there isn’t a singing Jamaican crab to annoy me.”

  “Ha.” She lay back down on the stern. “I knew it, you do know the movie.”

  “You told me about it before. Back then, you insisted you had blue eyes like the mermaid.”

  “It is blue, under certain lighting.”

  “Color-blind, are you?” I remarked.

  Karin shoved upright and splashed me with water. I cracked a slow grin as she laughed, taking in the way her face lit up.

  “I’ve half a mind to take you behind those trees right now,” I murmured. She looked so intrigued that I had to add, “There might be leeches.”

  Karin sighed wistfully. “I guess it’s not all like in the movies.”

  We settled into a companionable silence, Karin content to take in the surrounding lake as I rowed. Aside from a handful of other boats, we were alone out here. It was peaceful and strangely quiet, not something I’d ever have expected to feel in New York.

  I watched Karin as she closed her eyes, tipping her face to the morning sun. The light caught the gold in her hair, the light pink of her lips, the warm cream of her skin. She was utterly beautiful.

  Just for today, I thought. Just for today I’d be with her as her date, pretend that this day would stretch into a lifetime. And at night, I would take her back to my bed, worship her until morning. I’d see the sunlight reflected in her sleepy eyes as the sun came up, marvel at the way her hair spread across my pillow.

  But I also knew that one day wouldn’t be enough. It would never be enough.

  The idea I had been toying with for weeks became impossible to ignore:

  If I could somehow become worthy of her…?

  “You’re frowning again.” Karin watched me curiously. “What are you thinking about?”

  For an inexplicable reason, I felt almost brave. “Karin, I know it’s too early to ask, and I know I don’t deserve to ask it.” I set the oars aside, not wanting anything else in the way of the most important question I’d ever ask.

  “But I’ve been thinking,” I began carefully. “I have a plan to… to change, if you will. And no matter what you decide, it’s something I’m going to do. But it would mean a lot, that is, it would give me hope if you think you could…”

  “Forgive?”

  I let out a breath. “Yes. That.”

  I waited for Karin’s answer, every heavy beat of my pulse seeming to hinge on her next words.

  A slow, beautiful smile spread across Karin’s face.

  “Of course I could,” she said softly. “I want to.”

  “Good.” I nodded, relieved and hardly believing my ears. “That’s good.”

  Karin beamed at me, and suddenly I felt like a right tool for putting this off for so long.

  This was right. This was what I should have done from the start.

  “Now would be a good time to kiss me,” Karin prompted.

  I obliged, pulling her to me for a long, lingering taste. She was sweet, warm with sunshine and innocence.

  “Does this mean you’re going to stay?” she asked breathlessly when we broke apart.

  I ran my thumb over her cheek, drunk on the way she was gazing up at me through her lashes. Now that I finally had a shot at her forgiveness, I would not stop until I earned it.

  “Yes,” I murmured in wonder. “I suppose I am.”

  ***

  Karin took me about the city for the rest of the day, showing me her frequented spots and sharing anecdotes about her life. It was late in the night by the time we were done with dinner at her favorite pizza place.

  New York was packed at night, that I could see, but the part of the city we were in was also brimming with a less than savory crowd.

  However, Karin was adamant that we get back to my place via subway.

  I was reluctant to be traipsing around like an easy target, but she assured me repeatedly that it was perfectly safe.

  “We’re only five minutes from the station. I know a shortcut.”

  Her shortcut turned out to be a dark alleyway between two buildings.

  My hackles raised instantly. “Karin, do not tell me you’ve been going this way alone.”

  “Heck no, never alone. Always with someone.”

  That didn’t ease me much. “We’re going to take a cab.”

  “The subway’s faster,” Karin insisted. Without waiting for my reply, she turned into the alley, throwing me a sultry glance over her shoulder. “I don’t know about you, but I’m kinda in a hurry to get back to your place.”

  Then she went on ahead of me, her ass swishing with every step.

  My lips curved reluctantly. Bloody hell, but she knew exactly how to get to me.

  Nothing would happen in five minutes, I surmised. We were a single block away from the main street, and I could hear the bustle of heavy traffic and pedestrians loud and clear. My paranoia was residual of my time in Barclay, but that was a good twelve years ago. I had to let go of that no
w.

  Besides, I was far too eager to have Karin in my bed again.

  I caught up with her, and she gave me a grin that made me glad I had given in.

  We weren’t alone for long, however.

  My instincts grew alert when a man in a hooded coat turned into the alley from the end across us, but I relaxed slightly when I saw that his gait was steady. Not a drunk, then.

  Nonetheless I shifted Karin to my right, putting my body between her and the man when he would pass.

  Karin grinned at the gesture, slipping her hand into mine.

  “Thanks,” she whispered. “I knew you’d take care of me.”

  But nothing happened as it should have the next few seconds. The man didn’t pass us like I’d expected.

  I caught the moment his footsteps angled towards us. There was a glint of metal, and without thinking I shoved Karin behind me.

  Pain shot through my abdomen like I’d been punched, and I staggered a step back.

  “Excuse me, sir!” Karin cried. “What do you think you’re—”

  “Run,” I rasped, thrusting her away from the man and me. “Run!”

  “Theo, why—” She froze when her gaze fell to the knife plunged in my side. “Oh my god.”

  The look in the man’s eyes was intent as he turned to Karin, and I knew that whoever hired him had also given another order:

  Leave no witnesses.

  I grabbed onto his hand around the knife handle, holding the blade in my side. The pain was pure fire in my veins, but Karin couldn’t get hurt. Not her.

  “Run.” The pain was making me black out. I yelled when the man twisted the knife, but I held on tight. “Go!”

  Karin took off towards the main street. I knew she was crying for help, but I couldn’t hear anything above the blood rushing in my ears.

  “Who?” I gasped. “Who sent you?”

  The man said nothing as he yanked the knife free from my body, sending white-hot sparks of pain through me. He took off deeper into the alley, away from Karin.

  I slumped onto the ground on my knees, furiously blinking the spots from my vision. My hands were pressed into my side where I thought the wound was, but I couldn’t see anything but blackness.

  I heard footsteps around me, voices yelling.

  “Karin.” I grasped blindly.

  Her hands clutched mine tightly. “I’m here. Theo, I’m here. The ambulance is coming, hold on…”

  “Hurt?”

  “No.” She sobbed. “No, I’m okay. Just hold on, please. It’ll be okay.”

  I vaguely felt myself keeling, but I was caught against a soft, small body before I hit the ground. The blood pooling around me felt disconcertingly warm, even as the rest of my body chilled.

  The life was literally draining out of me. No matter what Karin said, it would not be okay.

  But she was safe.

  Karin was safe, and that was all that mattered.

  “Theo? Theo!” I let out a choked cry as I shook his shoulder. His body felt unnaturally heavy against me, slumping in my arms as he passed out.

  There was so much blood everywhere. It coated my arms, soaked through Theo’s shirt. It gathered on the asphalt under him, slowing growing into a dark pool.

  I sensed that a small crowd had gathered around us, but I couldn’t care. I held Theo close, feeling his shallow breaths against my arm. They were too faint. I was terrified that each breath would be his last.

  “Theo, wake up,” I whispered hoarsely. “Stay with me.”

  My eyes were strangely dry in my panic, and I never took them off Theo’s face. Within seconds he had gone completely ashen. Of all the times, my irrational mind decided now to remind me of the day Theo had fallen asleep in the watchtower. He looked just like that now, eyes closed, lips slightly parted, hair tumbling over his forehead.

  I brushed his hair aside with clumsy, stiff fingers.

  Should I give him CPR? I didn’t know how to do it, didn’t know if it would worsen his wound. I was completely useless, and the thought that he might never wake frightened me.

  “Stay with me,” I begged, not daring to take my eyes off Theo even for a second in case he slipped away. “Please stay, please…”

  I clung on to him even after the ambulance arrived, my fingers cramped and unable to let go. The paramedics had to pry my fingers off before they could put him on a stretcher and transfer him to the back of the ambulance.

  I clambered on, anxiously staying close behind. An oxygen mask was put over Theo’s face while another medic cut his shirt open.

  I let out a cry before I could stifle it.

  The wound in his side was not a slit like I had seen in movies. It was an ugly, gaping gash, torn around the edges and seeping blood, so much blood. It seemed to flow in time to the beating of his heart.

  “Ma’am, please stay back.”

  The medics applied pressure to the wound, reading out numbers from the machines they’d hooked him up to. The numbers made no sense to me, and yet they summed up all the life that was left in Theo.

  “Blood pressure severely low. Patient losing large amounts of blood, going into cardiac arrest. Requesting immediate surgery upon arrival.”

  I pressed my hands over my mouth to hold in my cries. The tears that had been absent in my shock earlier was now pouring out with everything the medics were saying.

  “Prepare the defib.”

  “Clear.”

  Theo’s torso jerked when they applied the metal paddles to his chest, but he remained unconscious.

  “No response, recharge.”

  “Clear.”

  Theo never moved a muscle. I forced myself to stay out of the medics’ way, praying to every god and deity that we reached the hospital soon.

  The last I saw of Theo when we got to the hospital was him being taken through to the operating theatre, the light above the doors turning on as he disappeared through them.

  “You can’t go that way, ma’am. Please come with me.”

  I followed numbly as a nurse took me into a medical room to check my pupils and temperature.

  “Please drink this.”

  My hands were shaking so badly I nearly dropped the paper cup they handed me. “Is he going to be okay?”

  “We can’t say. Please rest here for now, you’re in shock and in need of sugar. A doctor will be with you in a minute. You may wish to contact your family.”

  The nurse thankfully left me alone after that. I focused on my breathing to get my emotions under control before taking my phone and calling the only person in the world I could think of now.

  “Allie?” I croaked when the line connected.

  “Heya, baby sis, you’re just in time! Ryland and I just got back from the airport.”

  Oh god, I had forgotten that they were returning today.

  “I brought back so much junk for you,” Allie continued. “There’s a purple pigment paint made from seashells, oils from—”

  I choked at the sound of her voice. “Allie, I’m at the hospital.”

  “The what? Oh my god, are you okay? Which hospital, we’re on our way.”

  “I’m fine. It’s—” Tears filled my eyes again, and I blinked them away. Crying wouldn’t help anyone now. “It’s Theo.”

  “Theo Valentine?”

  “He’s in surgery now. H-he was stabbed. We were together in town and there was this man—”

  “You were with him?” Allie yelled. I heard Ryland’s voice in the background, sounding none too happy about it himself.

  “I’m okay,” I pleaded. “I’m not hurt at all, I swear. I’ll explain everything when you get here.”

  “You better.” Allie’s voice was unsteady. “And you’ll start with what you were doing with Theo Valentine in the first place.”

  After the call, a doctor came and treated the scrapes on my arms, then got me to fill out a form in the waiting area.

  “We’ll need the patient’s particulars for administration. Any family or next-of-kin who ne
eds to be informed?”

  Estelle wouldn’t leave her safehouse and risk herself. I didn’t even know if she was behind this yet, and aside from her, there was no one else.

  “No. He has no family.”

  “Then any close friends who can be here?”

  Mrs Smith was the only other person I could think of, but she was halfway across the country by now. “N-no. I don’t think so.”

  The doctor frowned. “Isn’t there anyone who can sign on his behalf?”

  “I’ll do it.” I took the clipboard and filled in as much information about Theo as I could, then signed my name on the form.

  Ryland and Allie arrived soon after that. My sister’s hand flew to her mouth when she saw me.

  “Oh my god, you’re bleeding!” She stared in horror at my bandages. “Oh my god. Oh god!”

  I had never seen my sister in such a panic before, and I hastened to reassure her. “I scraped my hands on the asphalt, that’s all.”

  Allie pulled me into a gingerly hug, brushing her hands down my body. “You sure you’re okay? There’s so much blood on you.”

  I swallowed. “It’s Theo’s, none of mine.”

  Ryland looked just as on edge as Allie. “What exactly happened here?”

  I reached into my pocket, producing the flash drive that Theo had given me that morning. Our disagreements over it all seemed so petty now that he was lying in the surgery room with no sign of gaining consciousness.

  “Estelle's confession is right here, from start to finish.” I swallowed. “And that’s not all. She’s still here in New York, and Theo gave me her location too.”

  Ryland took the flash drive with a look of disbelief, while Allie went still as a statue. Instead of looking relieved, her face went white, which meant that she was really upset. “K, you agreed you wouldn’t be involved in this!”

  “I’ll handle matters with the police,” Ryland muttered. “Cam and Gabriel will be here soon. You two talk in the meantime.”

  “I can explain.” I grabbed Allie’s hand, desperate for some comfort. “Theo isn’t what you think he is. He protected me earlier when…” I drew a deep breath when my voice broke, before trying again. “We were out together, and this man came from nowhere with a knife. He stabbed Theo before turning on me, but Theo held on to him.”