Just One Touch: A Black Alcove Novel (The Black Alcove Series Book 3)

by Jami Wagner

  “As lame as this sounds, I think it’s us more than it is one person.”

  A deep chuckle comes from his throat. He turns to look at me, but his eyes catch sight of something else. The moment I see him reach for my mail on the table I straddle his lap.

  “I’m not sure we’re finished,” I say, distracting him and shaming myself for leaving something so stupid out in the open.

  When he looks me in the eye, I see the question there. The one asking me what I’m hiding, but I can’t answer him. Instead, I kiss him and I don’t stop kissing him until his sister calls to tell him she’s here with Jake.

  When he leaves I can think only one thing: every day that I don’t tell him, I’m making things worse, and there is good chance this won’t end well.

  Chapter Eleven

  Alexis

  From the moment Conner reminded me about this get together at his friend’s house, I’ve felt this weird vibe. Like he was nervous I was going to say no. His hands have been twisting around the steering wheel for the entire drive, and he hasn’t spoken but a few words here and there. Normally I’d let his odd actions pass and not think another thing of it, but his nervousness is making me worry. There’s only one way to address this: ask him the obvious question and hope that his answer isn’t the one I believe it is. I never asked him whose house we were going to—because who has a barbeque twice a month?—but right now, I wish I would have done that before we got in the truck.

  “Conner, is everything okay?” Although this isn’t my question, easing into the one I want to ask is probably the best idea.

  “Yeah,” he answers quickly, not pulling his eyes away from the road to look at me. Safety is good, but he’s always been the kind of person to make eye contact when he talks. Avoiding it isn’t a good sign. When he doesn’t add to his answer, I get the feeling he knows, and I get right to the point.

  “Whose house are we going to?”

  “A friend’s.”

  “What kind of friend?”

  “It’s Logan’s house,” he blurts out.

  Crap. I knew it. I can’t meet him now. I’m not ready to do this. What is Conner thinking, bringing me here? Oh that’s right, he has no idea because I’ve kept it a secret. Unless he does know, and then this is awful.

  “Like, the same couple who own the bar you work at?” It’s a stupid question, I know, but I’m secretly hoping he knows another Logan.

  “Yes, and I know how you feel about the whole thing, but Logan is my best friend and I really want you two to meet.”

  “I’m not feeling well. I think you should take me home.”

  “What?” At the same moment he pulls his truck into the driveway of a medium-sized dark blue house with brown trim. From the outside it looks as though it might be a bi-level. I can tell it definitely has an upstairs from the giant window in the arc.

  There are a group of people huddled around the middle of three garage doors and a group of women near the front door. I immediately recognize Beth and Kelsey, but the other woman, the one with blonde hair curled and flowing like waterfall to the middle of her back, I don’t know her. But I have a pretty good idea who she is. She’s another person I’m not ready to meet.

  “We have to leave,” I say, quickly. My body temperature rises and I feel the lunch I had earlier fighting its way to come up. “Now, please. Get me out of here now!”

  Somewhere in the three sentences I’ve managed to say since we arrived, I’ve started to cry and Beth has noticed us. She’s now looking at me with a puzzled expression as Conner backs out of the driveway.

  “Alex, I need you to explain what happened just now.” His voice is calm and sweet, but I still don’t answer. There is only one way for me to explain this without sounding like I’ve totally lost my mind. I’m going to have to tell him the truth.

  “Just at least nod to tell me it’s not a life-or-death situation.”

  Isn’t it, though? What happens when Logan decides he doesn’t want me to be a part of his life? Or what happens if it turns out I’m not really his sister and the letter was a fake?

  Still, I nod.

  We drive in silence, the same way as before until we’ve reached the apartment. I head for my door and Conner for his. If I don’t do this now, I’ll never find the courage to do it again, and if I don’t tell him something, anything, about what just happened, whatever this is between us could be ruined.

  “Conner, if you want to come over for a minute, I’d like to explain some things to you.” I say the words slowly, as if I need to say them to myself to reassure in my own mind that this needs to happen. Maybe by telling Conner, I’ll be one step closer to telling Logan.

  His step falters as his gaze meets mine. Worry and frustration take over his beautiful face. Finally, he nods and follows me inside. I point to the sofa and then take a seat across from him.

  “Why have you never asked what my last name is?” I ask.

  “It’s easy to see that you are still guarding yourself from me. I don’t know what this is, but I never asked you too many personal questions because I didn’t want to ruin whatever we have.”

  “And I adore you for that, Conner, but I didn’t just come here for a fresh start on a new life.” I slide a magazine on the table toward him, waiting until he reads it over. The moment he sees my name, Alexis Parker, I expect him to be furious, but instead, he’s the total opposite.

  “So it’s true? You really are Logan’s sister.”

  I can see in the way he slouches into one of my kitchen table chairs that he’s hurt. I should have told him sooner.

  “I came here to find my brother, and he just so happens to be your best friend. I didn’t plan that, but I’m glad you’re friends with him.”

  The way his lips twitch, I can see he’s fighting the urge to smile. Sooner than I’d like, the urge is gone and the frustration is back.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I didn’t want anyone to know.”

  “Why not?”

  “I didn’t want anyone to treat me differently once they knew.”

  “Not even me?”

  “Especially you. Logan’s your best friend, and I knew if I told you, you’d make me tell him.”

  “You’re not going to tell him?”

  “No.”

  His hand curls into a fist on the table as he lets out a breath. Now his voice is low and firm.

  “Logan looked for you for over a year. Not finding you tore him up. It caused problems with him and Sara, and he sacrificed a lot for you. And here you are, in the same town, and you don’t even have the respect for him to tell him who you are.”

  “Conner, it’s not that easy. I’m not ready to admit to him that I’m here.”

  “Why not?”

  “I’m just not ready.”

  “You’re not ready to tell your brother that the family he searched for, the family he thinks wants nothing to do with him, came to Wind Valley to find him?”

  “Yes, and I’d really appreciate if you kept this between us.” The last word comes out almost in a whisper. I know how he feels about secrets, or holding the truth from someone. Asking him to do this is asking him to go against everything he is.

  The gaze that usually seeps right into my soul and warms my heart turns cold and angry. I have to look away before I start crying again.

  “You can’t be serious.”

  “I know how it sounds, but—”

  “Nothing good will come from keeping this to yourself, Alexis Parker.” The bitter way he says my full name stings. “I don’t want to be a part of it. Either you tell Logan or I will.”

  He doesn’t wait for me to respond before he exits my apartment. I don’t even know what I would have said if he had waited. He’s right, I need to tell Logan. I just hope Conner gives me the time I need to do it on my own.

  Conner

  It’s been a week since Alex told me she’s Logan sister. Alexis. She’ll always be just Alex to me. I shouldn’t have doubted
it for so long. I should have just manned up and asked her about it. Been there for her instead letting it dwell in my mind or instead of walking out on her when she did finally admit the truth.

  Every day I wait for Logan’s call to either tell me about it or ask me how long I knew. Each day that phone call doesn’t come, it becomes harder for me to not say anything.

  I know I should let her do it, but she wasn’t here. She doesn’t know what Logan went through. Although he never came out and told me he decided to give up, all the signs were there, and I’ll never forget the way he acted.

  My phone rings and the hope that it’s Logan strikes again.

  It’s not. It’s Alex.

  I press the ignore button, the same way I’ve done since she told me. We weren’t even officially dating, but the fact that she couldn’t trust me, that even after everything I told her she still kept it a secret, pains me. Was she ever really listening to me, or was she just using me to get closer to Logan?

  I’m such a coward for acting this way when I have things of my own I’m keeping from her.

  I shake the thought the moment I’ve made it. Alex and Logan haven’t even met, that I know of, so it’s impossible she could have been using me. Still, another woman I brought into my life didn’t trust me enough to let me into her own.

  “Knock, knock,” Heather’s voice comes from my doorway. Jake runs in, his hair spiked and his Ninja Turtle backpack half the size of him bounces off his legs as he jumps on the couch next to me.

  “Dad! Mom said I was staying for a whole week! How cool is that!” Every word that comes out his mouth is filled with excitement. There is no possible way I can be anything but happy when he’s around. My feeling toward his mother however, is not so happy. She picked him up for two days from my parents’ house no less, probably avoiding me. And now, something new apparently came up, and he’s back. His mother’s lack of commitment to him these last two weeks is not okay.

  “Yeah, bud, it’s a boys weekend for sure,” I say, but he’s already focused on pulling some toys out of his backpack.

  “I’ll be back on Thursday,” Heather says, still standing in the doorway. I get off the couch to join her.

  “I need to talk to you about something,” I say as she turns to leave.

  “Can it wait? I really have to go.”

  “No, it can’t wait.” I follow her out into the hallway, leaving the door cracked so Jake can’t hear us but just in case he needs me.

  “You’ll have to call me,” she says.

  “Heather, no, we need to talk.”

  “Call me.” She exits through the building door. I follow her.

  “Heather!” She doesn’t stop and I’m not going to chase her down.

  “Dad?”

  “Yeah?” I turn. Jake is standing in the hallway, leaning against the wall, bouncing from his butt to his back as he talks. “You said this was a boy’s weekend.”

  “Sure is,” I say with a smile.

  “What about Alex? She isn’t a boy.”

  I swallow then, my heart tugging at the way his bummed out voice recognizes that we won’t be hanging out with Alex.

  “No, bud, we won’t. Maybe next time,” I tell him, praying inside that Alex tells Logan soon. I want to hang out with her, too.

  Jake watches me for a moment, his little brown eyes looking at me like he knows I’m keeping something from him. He’s quickly distracted, and the moment he sits back on the couch, that’s when it hits me.

  My chest aches at the mess things are in right now and my fist is curled and digging into the couch cushions. Five minutes. That’s all I needed. I wanted to be respectful and talk to Heather in person, but if she won’t let that happen, then over the phone it is. The fact I haven’t told her and the fact I can’t confront anyone is making things worse.

  That’s going to change.

  Chapter Twelve

  Conner

  I texted Heather early this morning, asking her to call me when she had a free moment today, seeing as how again she wouldn’t answer my calls again last night. At 3:00 p.m. on the dot, like she said, my phone vibrates in my hand. I press the green button, accepting the call and praying for the best.

  “Hello?” I sound like an idiot because I know who it is.

  “Conner, you wanted me to call you?” There’s a hopeful tone to her voice that stabs me.

  “Yes, I just wanted to talk to you about us and the suggestion you made a few weeks ago.”

  “Okay, I’m free now. Where do you want to start?”

  I take a nice, deep breath and release it as calmly as I possibly can. Please let this go well.

  “A while ago, the apartment across from me was rented out and the woman who moved in,” I stop right there. This is not the best way to start this. I have to tell her, yeah, but just in case she uses Jake against me, I still need to be nice about it.

  “Alright, so, I don’t think our becoming a couple is the best idea for us or for Jake.” Yeah, okay, that sounds better.

  For a second, she doesn’t respond.

  “You don’t?” Her voice is soft and then I hear her sniffle.

  “I love Jake with all my heart. Don’t ever doubt that. But, Heather, I don’t have those same feelings for you, and you deserve someone who is going to love you that way. We both do.”

  “But we can get there. We have a son together. Doesn’t it mean something to give this a try?”

  “It does, yes, as long as both parties want it.”

  “And you don’t want me. You don’t want a family with me and Jake. He deserves it. You won’t even do it for him?”

  “Even if I did this for him, it wouldn’t be fair to him. He needs parents who are happy and who get along. That’s where we are now and I don’t want to ruin it by forcing something that isn’t there.”

  “But it’s there with this new person, who moved in across from you. Was that where you were going with that? That you fell in love with someone else?”

  Am I in love?

  I run my hand over my face. Going into detail about Alex wasn’t part of my plan, but I guess I messed that up the moment I opened my mouth.

  “It’s Logan’s sister.” I say each word slowly. It’s the first time I’ve said it out loud.

  “I wasn’t aware he had a sister.”

  “Yeah, she’s younger than him.” I scratch the back of my neck as I push off the couch and lean against the counter.

  Silence takes over the phone call.

  “Is she attractive?”

  The question catches me off guard, causing me to hesitate on my answer, which apparently isn’t the right answer right now.

  “An attractive woman is going to distract you from your son, Conner.”

  “Nothing will distract me from my son.”

  “You don’t know that, I know it.”

  “Heather, I swear to you, Jake is and will always be my first priority.”

  “Conner—”

  “Trust me.” My voice raises and immediately I regret it. This is not how I wanted this conversation to go. “Please,” I say, my voice much more calm and pleading.

  “Fine, but I don’t like it. I don’t like knowing my son is around another woman when he isn’t with me.”

  “Alex is great with him; you have nothing to worry about.”

  “Can I meet her?” This questions throw me completely off. “Please, for peace of mind. When I bring Jake over next weekend.”

  “Okay,” I answer. Alex will understand. “As long as she isn’t working at the gym, she should be here.”

  We hang up and I sigh with relief. Our conversation didn’t go anything close to what I had imagined it would, and I also covered a second dreaded topic. Now, I just need to patch things up with Alex so she can meet Heather. I should probably not start by mentioning this conversation.

  Alexis

  Conner doesn’t answer my phone call, again. I consider texting him but there is no emotion in a text and I want him to know and
hear that I’m serious. I’m going to tell Logan soon, and I’d really like it if Conner would help me out with what I’m going to say, because everything he said was right. I need to tell Logan and I have to stop pretending like I’m the only person whose life this is going to affect. Conner never actually said those words, but they were definitely implied about the choices I’ve made up to this point.

  As usual, I clock in when I get to work and head to the back to take the pool temperatures. I put out fresh towels and pick up random hand weights, jump ropes, and any other workout tools left unattended before heading back to the front. If tonight could stay busy until I got off, that would be fantastic. I plan to go to Conner when I get off and I don’t need to spend my entire night stressing over how he might react.

  “Boyfriend troubles?” Pete asks when I pass the CrossFit area and the indoor track where a younger couple is running laps.

  “I’m sorry?” I ask. Pete hasn’t ever shown the interest Abby said he had for me the day I met him, so I’m not upset he’s asking about Conner. It does, however, bother me that he assumes something is wrong.

  “You just look lost in thought, and I since I have a sister, I’ve seen the look before,” he says.

  “Oh, well, no, everything is great.”

  “I’ve also heard that fake ‘I’m not going to tell you about it’ answer before, too.”

  Shoot.

  “Look, you don’t have to tell me what happened if you don’t want to, but I am a good listener if you change your mind.”

  I’m about to apologize when a woman turns the corner near the yoga studio. She has short, dark hair and porcelain skin that reminds me of a girl named Heather I grew up with in my last foster home. She smiles, gaining my full attention. Pete walks around us without another word.

  “Alexis?” the woman asks when I’m close enough to touch her. I pause to get a better look—she is the same girl from my foster home. Her face lights up, probably a mimicked reaction to my own, and we hug.