Shattered

by Janet Nissenson

  “Happy to oblige,” he replied. “Now, tell me. Anything interesting on her schedule this week?”

  Cara glanced behind her nervously, making sure the door to her boss’s office remained closed. If Angela had any idea that Cara was not only secretly conspiring with Nick to get her to eat more, but was also letting him know about her personal appointments, she’d be throwing more than just books against the wall.

  Nick had told her in strictest confidence that he and Angela had been together a few years back – a fact that Cara had begun to suspect the first time she’d seen them together and observed how hot and fast the sparks had flown. Nick had also begged for Cara’s help in convincing Angela to give him a second chance, and Cara, who’d always been a starry-eyed romantic, had willingly agreed to do whatever she could. She would secretly let Nick know about any weekend plans Angela might have mentioned, or certain meetings or appointments where he could contrive to “coincidentally” be in the same area.

  “Um.” Cara hesitated now, not at all certain if she ought to be telling this particular bit of news to Nick. “Not really. I mean, no social engagements or races this week. Except, well, I’m not sure -”

  Nick placed his hands on her desk and leaned over a little further, bringing his darkly handsome face to within inches of hers. She gulped again as he very deliberately smiled at her, and she wondered weakly if it was really possible to drown in someone’s eyes.

  “Cara.” Her name sounded like a purr on his lips – the purr of a huge, menacing lion, that is. “You know you can trust me.”

  Cara shook her head. “It’s not that. It’s just, well, this particular appointment is different. It’s – more personal. Like -”

  “What?” asked Nick teasingly. “A pap smear? Bikini wax? Or some other type -”

  “Lunch with Dwayne,” she blurted out. “He’s meeting her here today at one o’clock.”

  Nick straightened suddenly, his grin fading. “I see. Well, things are going to get very interesting around here in a few hours, aren’t they?”

  Cara fought down a paralyzing sense of alarm. “What – you aren’t going to approach him, are you? Angela will go ballistic if you do anything.”

  Nick gave her another wink. “Didn’t you know I’m a huge track and field fan? I’d love nothing better than to meet a medal winning high jumper. Hey, no worries, Cara. I just want to size up my competition a bit is all. Everything will be just fine.”

  As Nick sauntered off with his usual careless swagger, Cara couldn’t help sighing in reaction. God, she thought, it was a real pity he was way too old for her, way too tall, way too out of her league, and way too interested in Angela. And, having met Dwayne Conroy more than once or twice, Cara thought rather smugly that Nick definitely didn’t have to worry about any potential competition coming from that end.

  ***

  Nick scowled as he read over the limited amount of information he’d been able to pull up on Dwayne Conroy. It was basically just his athletic bio and results from his college and professional competitions. There was an official photo posted on the U.S. Track and Field website that revealed a guy of average looks, large, squarish features, a shock of sandy brown hair, and a decidedly goofy grin. Aside from that, there was really no other information he could find.

  As he closed out the website and returned to the financial report he was really supposed to be checking out, Nick wondered what the hell he was doing anyway. When had he ever bothered to check out the competition, so to speak? Christ, he’d never had competition before now, never had to worry about wooing a woman away from another man. Women flocked to him automatically, ignored other men in the hopes of attracting his attention. So why the hell was he bothering to try and get Angela back again, especially when she continued to make it very obvious that she didn’t give a shit about him any longer?

  But it was precisely because he didn’t really believe that fact that he kept on trying. He refused to accept the reality that the blazing attraction that had existed between them four years ago had burned out and couldn’t be re-lit. And he wasn’t going to give up on her without a fight. He knew that she still cared for him, could see it in the way she reacted to him. Granted, her reactions right now consisted of alternately cursing at him or threatening to throw something his way, but, hey – wasn’t hate just one step away from love?

  Nick was grinning as that old saying came to mind just before one o’clock, and he started walking towards the elevator lobby. But the grin froze on his face as he saw Angela and Dwayne approaching from the opposite direction.

  Today had been the first time since he’d started working here that Angela had actually worn something other than one of those god-awful tailored pantsuits. And while the crisp, khaki-colored belted shirtdress wasn’t exactly sexy, it was a vast improvement over any of the other outfits he’d seen her wearing the past couple of months. It showed off the long, slender length of her legs, which, he was relieved to notice, didn’t look quite so scrawny these days. In fact, Angela was slowly beginning to gain a bit more weight, and while she was still a long way from where she needed to be, her cheekbones didn’t look so gaunt and she actually had a hint of cleavage.

  She’d also, Nick noticed grimly, bothered to do something with her hair and makeup today, and was even wearing a pair of earrings and a gold bracelet. And, he realized with a pang, she was smiling, really smiling, for the very first time since he’d seen her again. The fact that she was bestowing that smile on another man made his fists clench in mingled fury and frustration.

  Dwayne Conroy was every bit as goofy and somewhat nerdy as his photo had hinted at, but from initial appearances he also seemed like a genuinely nice guy. There was nothing the least bit pretentious about his appearance, dressed as he was in jeans, a red polo shirt, and athletic shoes, the latter two items both emblazoned with the signature Nike logo. He was exceptionally tall, perhaps even an inch or so taller than Nick, who certainly wasn’t used to having to literally look up to other men. But Dwayne was as lean as a greyhound, as opposed to Nick’s heavily muscled form, and Nick guessed the younger man had been skinny as a beanpole until just a few years ago.

  But, he acknowledged reluctantly, Angela didn’t seem to give two figs about how Dwayne looked, or that her current boyfriend wasn’t exactly stud material. And somehow or other, the tall, awkward looking guy had managed to work at least one miracle – getting the so-called ice queen to thaw out enough to actually smile.

  Angela glanced up first at the sound of Nick’s footsteps on the tiled floor of the elevator lobby, and the smile froze on her face, her dark eyes suddenly furious. Dwayne followed the direction of her gaze, but his own reaction at seeing Nick was vastly different. His eyes practically bugged out of their sockets, and his jaw dropped open in disbelief.

  “Oh, my, God,” Dwayne murmured in awe. “Are you really Nick Manning? The Nick Manning from the 49ers?”

  Nick gave his so-called rival his best “gotta keep the fans happy” smile. “Guilty as charged. Angela – introduce me to your, ah, friend.”

  Angela gave him a look that said she’d much rather introduce his crotch to the pointed toe of her shoe. Dwayne beat her to the punch by eagerly extending his hand in greeting.

  “Dwayne Conroy. Wow, this is unbelievable, such an honor to meet you, Nick. Uh, that is, can I call you Nick?” he babbled excitedly.

  Nick couldn’t help returning Dwayne’s grin. “Yeah, it’s all good. And – wait. Dwayne Conroy. Why does that name sound familiar?” He pretended to think for a few seconds before snapping his fingers in recollection. “I know. I watched you compete at the indoor track and field championships. You won the high jump, didn’t you?”

  By now Dwayne was almost leaping out of his size fourteen shoes in excitement. “Come on! No way does the Nick Manning watch indoor track. Or remember the name of the high jump guys. I’m being punked, right? Angie, did you put him up to this?”

  Angela crossed her arms over her chest, giving Ni
ck the most evil glare he’d ever seen. He could almost feel the ice pouring off of her, and he half-expected to feel sharp little icicles stabbing into his skin any moment now.

  “No,” she replied flatly. “I most certainly did not.”

  But Dwayne was too excited about meeting Nick to notice his girlfriend’s own unenthusiastic attitude towards the famed football star.

  “And why didn’t you tell me a big star like Nick Manning worked here?” Dwayne asked her. “Especially since you know what a huge 49ers fan I’ve always been.”

  Angela gave a careless little lift of her shoulder. “I guess I didn’t give it a second thought.”

  Nick dared to give her a cheeky grin and a flirty wink, letting her know that he wasn’t fooled by her apparent indifference. And then he ignored the evil eye she kept focusing his way while he chatted casually with Dwayne for several minutes about football, track, basketball. It was only when he was sure he saw steam rising from the top of Angela’s sleek raven head that he backed off his very intentional antagonizing.

  “Angela looks hungry,” he told Dwayne. “I’d better let you two head out for lunch.”

  Dwayne looked crestfallen for a moment, then brightened again as he asked, “Hey, why don’t you join us, Nick? Man, that would be the greatest! You wouldn’t mind, would you, Angie?”

  Angela looked like she minded a great deal, but before she could voice her objections, Nick shook his head.

  “I appreciate the offer, Dwayne, but I’m afraid I already have a lunch engagement.”

  Angela sniffed disdainfully. “Another new girlfriend, I assume?”

  He gave her a knowing smile, quite certain that was jealously he heard in her voice. “A client, actually. I’ve, ah, been out of the dating game for quite some time now. It’s tough meeting the right girl these days.”

  Angela made a very undignified snort of disbelief, while Dwayne was all too eager to offer his assistance.

  “Oh, I could probably introduce you to someone, Nick,” he chimed in. “There’s a whole group of single women who train with me up in Oregon. Or Angela’s got this friend she could introduce you to. Her name’s Lauren.”

  “No!”

  Angela and Nick both uttered the exclamation simultaneously, causing Dwayne to stare at them in bewilderment.

  “Ah, I don’t think that’s a very good idea, Dwayne,” Angela mumbled hastily. “I mean, Lauren travels so much and she’s so independent that I don’t think she’d appreciate anyone setting her up.”

  “Yes, thanks for the thought, Dwayne,” Nick told him amicably, “but I’m not much into blind dates at this point in my life.”

  “Sure. Okay.” Dwayne nodded, still looking a bit bemused. “Probably all for the best, anyway. I mean, you’re a big, tough dude, Nick, but Lauren – well, she can be kind of scary. Some of the stories Angela has told me about her are hard to believe.”

  Angela took Dwayne firmly by the arm. “We should let Nick go meet his client, Dwayne,” she said, not even trying to sound tactful. “Besides, he was right before. I’m starving.”

  “Okay, let’s go. Hey, great to meet you, Nick,” enthused Dwayne. “I hope we meet again soon.”

  Angela practically yanked Dwayne into the waiting elevator car, not giving Nick a chance to reply.

  But it didn’t matter, thought Nick in a very satisfied manner as he walked back to his office. Because, having seen Angela and Dwayne together now, he had all the answers he needed. And knew what his next step in luring her back into his life was going to be.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Late June

  Angela had been trying – really trying – all evening to get into the swing of things. It was, after all, Julia’s bachelorette party and a night to just let loose, have fun, and drink until she got shit faced. But so far she had only been able to achieve one of those goals – namely, the latter one. And, as she sipped at another tumbler of lemon infused vodka, she wondered if part of her problem was because she was secretly jealous of Julia, or that she wasn’t wishing it was her own bachelorette party being celebrated tonight, or her own wedding scheduled for a week from now.

  She shook her head angrily, finishing her drink and motioning to the bartender for a refill. Julia had been considerate enough to hire a stretch limo to pick up and drop off all her guests tonight, so no one had to worry about driving home drunk. Though admittedly she hadn’t been drinking much at all as of late – part of the so-called healthy eating plan that Dwayne had designed for her. He was thrilled that she’d gained a full twelve pounds, was feeling stronger, and laying off the booze. What he didn’t know was that she’d gained most of the weight by stuffing her face in angry reaction each time that jackass Nick popped his arrogant head inside her office.

  She refused to think about that heartless bastard tonight, and instead focused her thoughts back to Dwayne. Angela couldn’t help but smile as the goofily grinning image of her – exactly what was Dwayne to her anyway – came to mind. He really was the sweetest guy – kind, considerate, funny. She’d laughed more in the past few months than she had in years, and most assuredly during the past four years – a time when she’d feared she had forgotten how to laugh. Dwayne had been a great friend to her, they’d had a lot of fun together, and he was one of the few people in her life that she genuinely liked.

  But, she realized with real regret, what she felt for him would never be anything more than friendship. There was zero physical attraction on her part, and aside from some friendly hugs and a few awkward kisses, there’d been no intimacy between them. Dwayne had never once pressured her about having sex, and frankly, she’d had her doubts for some time that he’d ever had sex with anyone. Via a couple of somewhat uncomfortable conversations, she’d learned that he was not, after all, a virgin but he was most definitely still very awkward and inexperienced with women. As for herself – well, after spending nearly a year as Nick Manning’s lover there wasn’t much she hadn’t done in bed.

  She’d kept that knowledge to herself, however, and had never fessed up to Dwayne that Nick had been the man responsible for the deep funk she’d fallen into. She preferred, in fact, not to talk about those eleven months with anyone, be it Dwayne, Lauren, or Julia. And while Dwayne knew there had been somebody, she’d never told him any details, whereas the twins at least had some vague idea of what her ill-fated relationship with Nick had been like.

  Angela grimaced as reluctant thoughts of her annoying ex-lover came to mind now. Nick continued to make a pest of himself, sticking his head inside her office door almost daily and saying something to get under her skin. By now her suspicions that he and Cara were in cahoots to get her to eat more were well founded, and if either of them thought they were continuing to fool her then they badly needed a reality check. Oddly, though, it didn’t irritate her any longer and she almost looked forward to both Nick’s deliberately antagonizing comments as well as whatever tempting treat Cara would oh so subtly plunk in front of her. It felt good to actually have something of an appetite again, and she even found herself eating dinner most nights of the week now. And by now she’d put on a few more pounds, enough to necessitate wearing her size four wardrobe and even some of the slimmer cut size six pieces.

  Like, for example, the dress she wore tonight. It was one of the first things Nick had bought her and had always been one of her favorites – a strapless Dolce and Gabbana with a pleated bodice and full skirt. The black background was relieved by the pale pink and green floral print. The fine, silky fabric felt luxurious against her skin while the fuller skirt helped to hide how slender her lower body still was. Almost defiantly she’d added a pair of strappy black sandals with a towering heel, so that she stood well over six feet tall. And so far this evening – both at dinner, the first bar they’d hit up, and now this place – Angela hadn’t spotted even one guy who might be taller than she was. Not that trolling for men was even close to being on her agenda this evening, especially not on the night of Julia’s bachelorette par
ty where almost a dozen other semi-inebriated women were along for the ride.

  Lauren, of course, had organized the whole thing, though she’d consulted with Angela about what places they ought to hit up. Lauren didn’t venture up to San Francisco all that often, and had never been a big city girl, unlike her twin. But Lauren certainly seemed to be in her element tonight – daring one of the other women to order a dangerously potent sounding drink; asking the DJ to play a certain song; bullying several of the others in their group to get up and dance; openly flirting with one good looking guy after another. Angela, who’d watched her best friend in action at bars just like this one far too many times to count, knew that the vast majority of Lauren’s flirting was all for show. She was extremely picky about the men she dated, much less slept with, and Angela couldn’t recall the last time Lauren had actually gone home with a guy.

  As she remained seated on her barstool, ignoring Lauren’s attempts to cajole her onto the dance floor, she had the oddest sensation of being watched. But a quick glance around the dimly lit bar revealed nothing amiss, and she told herself she was just being paranoid. Someone as tall as she was got a lot of curious stares, from men and women alike, and she should certainly be used to it by now.

  It had been Angela’s idea to come to this particular bar, even though it was more on the subdued, darkly sophisticated side than some of the others on Lauren’s schedule for the evening. This place had always been one of Nick’s favorites, and the owner was an old friend of his. They had always been assured of their privacy here, had always been given a secluded little booth in a darkened corner where they could talk, touch, kiss.

  She bit down on her lip to stifle a groan as she recalled one of the times he’d brought her here, and, if memory served her correctly, she’d been wearing this exact dress. The full skirt had allowed Nick easy access to her, and he’d taken quick advantage of that fact by finger fucking her to a heart-stopping orgasm. He’d made her suck on an ice cube the whole time, cautioning her not to make even the slightest sound or else he’d stop what he was doing. It had been one of the many, many ways he’d enjoyed exerting his control over her, and she’d loved it.