The First Immortal

by Matt Elam

  She replied quickly, “Dolores Kahl said you did great work for her.”

  It didn’t take me long to recall the name. Nice gal who thought her husband was two-timing her. Turned out he was actually three-timing her, doing a pair of Siamese twins from a low rent travelling circus.

  I invited her to sit down in one of the guest seats and she took my offer. The ends of her black dress slid upward as she crossed her legs, revealing a very slender and smooth looking lower thigh.

  I operated out of the most northern part of South LHK, on Jack Dempsey Street. The southside was definitely the wrong place for a high class looking dame like this one. She looked like a smart young woman, however, in her late twenties, maybe? Whatever her age, she had her reasons for being here.

  I cleared my throat softly. “So, Mrs. - ?”

  “Miss,” she corrected me. “Bai Ray.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry,” I said. “I noticed the fancy ring on your left hand, Miss Ray.”

  “Yes.” She looked down at her left ring finger. “It’s a promise ring that my boyfriend made me wear on this hand.”

  “Made you?” I inquired. She didn’t seem like a pushover to me.

  “Well, Benny can be stubborn,” she said with a bit of frustration in her face.

  I leaned forward. Curiosity had its hold on me now.

  “Who’s your boyfriend, Miss Ray?”

  “Benny Tang.”

  “Benny Tang of the Blue Mantis Triad?” I eyed her intently.

  “Yes.” She looked almost embarrassed or ashamed or something.

  I leaned back in my chair.

  “But he’s not what people say he is - ”

  I put my hands up. “I never said he was anything, Miss Ray.”

  “He can be different, sweet in private, you know?” She was looking at me like she wanted me to know why she was with a guy like that. All I knew at that moment was that those light brown eyes were like two red-hot flames and I was a helpless moth.

  Plus, I needed the work.

  “How can I help you, Miss Ray?”

  “Please, call me Bai.”

  “Okay. Bai,” I said. It was pronounced bye, like the end of goodbye, in English, anyway.

  “I’m looking for a friend of mine. She’s working as a dancer here in Little Hong Kong, now.”

  I leaned forward again to take notes on my mobile. “What strip club is she at?”

  “She is not a stripper!” said Bai, mouth agape, looking deeply offended.

  “Oh. I’m sorry,” I said. “What type of dancing does she do?”

  “Her and I used to dance for the Rockettes four-point-oh team in New York.”

  That explains the legs for days.

  “She came here to work out a contract with a jazz company, and last week…” She looked like she was going to water works all over my dusty desk no one gave a crap about - including me - so I didn’t try to stop her. “And now she’s gone missing,” she managed to get out.

  “How do you know she’s missing?”

  “Mr. Jo - ”

  “Johnny,” I said.

  “Johnny. We talk almost every day. It’s been that way since we met almost ten years ago. I’ve called, texted, emailed,” she said, shaking her head. “Nothing.” She looked like she may lose it for good this time, so I cut her off.

  “Okay. Have you tried the cops?”

  She nodded this time. “Yes, but they said they couldn’t physically report her missing unless I had evidence of wrong doing or an accident.”

  Typical. These LHK cops were fucking useless, except my boy, Donnie, that is.

  She also went on to say that Benny Tang had gotten physical with her when he found out she went to the five-oh. He didn’t want the “pigs” sniffing around his personal or business life.

  So, like the dumbass I am, I agreed to take her on as a client. We spent the next half hour going over details of the case and loads of paperwork, which consisted of a single piece of paper that said she had to pay me whether shit went bad or good with a signature and date line at the bottom.

  I offered to walk her to her car. When we exited the one-story building is when I first caught site of a silver hybrid SUV - ability to use tires or hovering technology. One man got out of the driver’s seat and another from the passenger side. Both in black suits. Both Asian and built like fighters.

  I wonder if they’re Blue Mantis guys?

  “Miss Ray,” said the driver, walking toward us. “Mr. Tang said you need to come with us,” in a menacing voice.

  Well, that solves that riddle. She grabbed my arm tightly, and I got the feeling she’d been ducking these clowns all day.

  “Hi boys. She’s enjoying my company now. So tell Tang Miss Ray will be home when she chooses to be home.”

  I had a feeling these guys were more of a show me, don’t tell me kinda’ crowd.

  Ten

  PASSENGER GUY WAS SNEERING at me as he approached. Yes, he was moving in a linear fashion, but with some calculated stops and diagonal steps too. These guys were smart fighters, obviously.

  “So, the legendary Johnny Jo,” said Passenger Guy. “Rumor is you’re the Kung Fu King?” he scoffed. “You don’t look so bad to me.”

  “That’s interesting, because I was just thinking about how you guys don’t look so smart to me.”

  “Please, Johnny,” said Bai Ray. “You’re only making things worse. I’ll go with them.” She looked utterly terrified.

  I knew I didn’t want to let her go back to that woman-abusing schmuck.

  The two men spread out and were beginning to circle around me.

  I shuffled to my left and pulled Bai backward with my left upper arm to which she let out a soft whimper. The area I’d touched was right below her right clavicle. It was covered by her sweater, but due to my First Immortals training, I could actually make out the bruising pattern formed behind the fabric of her sweater, dress, and bra. It was an asymmetric black and blue marking that easily had a knuckle or two imprinted into her myofascia.

  Sonofabitch. Now I was definitely not letting her go back to Tang. I told her to go into my office and lock the door. As she walked, I put my body between Tang’s two goons and Bai.

  I heard the lock click.

  “I’ve been waiting for this fight for a long time, Jo,” said Driver Guy.

  “That’s funny,” I said, “I didn’t even know you existed until five minutes ago, pal. But the way I see it, you’ve got two options: One, get in your hybrid now and leave with your health, or two, bleed on this parking lot.”

  The two men shot almost the exact same sinister smile at one another. I was always taught by Sifu to never take a fight or fighter for granted. These guys practiced the Hakka style of praying mantis kung fu. Their forearms and grips would be superiorly conditioned and they would seek to enter trapping range fast to smother my upper arms’ ability to deflect and defend.

  Driver Guy came crashing in - full speed ahead - with a looping right hand to my temple followed by a straight punch to my solar plexus. The second strike is what he wanted. Rather than moving back, I took a hard step toward him. I answered with a left high block and a right dropping forearm respectively, blocking both attacks. I launched my pow choi or long uppercut and clipped him under the chin.

  I spun around just in time to catch Passenger Guy unload a front kick aimed at my groin. It wasn’t that close so I didn’t honor it with a response. I threw a centerline punch to the level of his nose and he easily parried it, and latched on like a real mantis insect. I knew if I tried to pry my arm away from his grasp, he’d be sensitive to it, and strike vulnerable targets. So I just allowed my entire body to continue to move toward the force of his pulling hands. He was unable to reposition his hands or move backward in time.

  Crack.

  I caught him with the top of my head against his right orbital bone. I turned around to face Driver Guy but he was napping on the asphalt. My knuckles connected hard against the soft underbelly of his ch
in, a few inches away from his throat. I wouldn’t be surprised if I fractured his suprahyoid bone. I turned again to check on the formerly mouthy Passenger Guy who was holding his eye socket. He was out too. Not unconscious, but done nonetheless.

  Bai came out of my office and I locked the door. We passed by Passenger Guy as we made our way to the car. I stopped and leaned over him.

  “Tell your boss, if he’d like to lose more men, to keep sending them my way. Better yet, tell that little bitch who likes to hit women to come face me himself.”

  We got into my car and Bai studied me as I strapped in.

  “So what now, Mr. Jo?”

  “Johnny,” I said. I know a guy in the LHKPD that may be able to help us with your missing friend.

  I pulled the yellow stallion into 4260 Patagonia Ave., home of the Little Hong Kong Police Department. We got out and made our way to the entrance/exit doors. Once in, I went to the officer sitting at the desk and asked her to page Detective Donald Jinx. The young woman literally waved her two hands and a holograph computer screen appeared. She did some more orchestrating with her fingers.

  “He’s been notified, sir,” said the officer. “Please have a seat.”

  “Thanks,” I said, wondering if the word “page” was even a thing anymore. The young lady had looked at me funny.

  I sat down next to Miss Ray. She brushed a long strand of black hair behind her ear with her fingers.

  “I want to thank you for doing that back there,” she said.

  “For introducing you to Frank Sinatra songs? It was my pleasure,” I said with a smile on my face.

  Bai laughed. “I was thinking a little further back. You know, with Benny’s guys.” She was slowly twirling the ring around her finger, as if contemplating taking it off, but too afraid to go through with it.

  “Not a problem,” I said, casually.

  “Are you always this stoic?” asked Bai, half teasing.

  “I just find it’s better to not be too up or too down.”

  “Can you give me an example?” said Bai.

  “It’s kind of like this police precinct we’re sitting in.”

  She looked confused.

  “Half of the people in here are saints, and the other half, diarrhea of humanity. All under one roof. What do you get in the end? A split, right down the middle. Not too high or not too low. And that’s how life seems to play out.”

  She looked at me intently, trying to make sense of my words.

  “Mr. Jo? Detective Jinx will see you now.”

  We stood up.

  “Ponder that first lesson for a long while, Grasshopper. When you’re ready for the second one, you know where to find me.”

  “Who’s Grasshopper?” said Bai innocently.

  Jesus fucking balls. History is lost on the youth. And I was feeling outdated.

  Eleven

  DONALD WAS WAITING FOR me outside his office. He frowned when he saw Bai Ray walking by my side. That sourpuss expression on his face seemed to sum up our relationship over the past three years. I had to chuckle internally, however, because Donnie was such a fun-loving guy by nature. So much so, in fact, he was voted Most Likeable our senior year of high school.

  At this moment, he was getting my vote for Most Irritating.

  He ushered us into his office, where I pulled a seat out for Bai. Before I could sit down, Donald tapped my shoulder.

  “Can I, uh, speak with you a second out here?” said Jinx.

  He made it sound like he was asking, but I knew it was a command.

  “We’ll be right back, Bai,” I said.

  He shut his office door and we moved a few paces toward the main hallway that led to the lounge. He stopped when we rounded the corner.

  “Are you crazy?” said Jinx.

  “Depends on the context,” I said.

  He ignored my flippant response. “Do you know who that young woman is?”

  “Her name’s Bai Ray, and she’s a client of mine.”

  “Her name’s Bai Ray and she’s Benny Tang’s girl,” said Jinx quietly, with grit in his voice.

  “I know that.”

  “Well, then you know that Tang’s a big time roller.” Jinx scanned the corridor. “He’s even got low-lifes in this department that are on the take.”

  I explained the events that had happened at my own office. All of them. I wanted to be completely transparent with Donald. About this matter, anyway.

  Donald sighed.

  “You’re the only one I trust in this place, Donnie.”

  We stood there just looking at each other for a beat.

  “What do you need from me,” asked Jinx.

  “I just need a safe place for her to stay while I search for her missing friend.”

  Donald rubbed the top of his shaved head.

  “I can’t ask anyone in this department,” he said. “We don’t know who the moles are.”

  “That’s pretty damn sad,” I said.

  “Tell me about it.”

  “Our best bet is to go to Patricia and ask her for assistance.”

  “Thank you, brother.” Part of me felt relief, even though Patti hadn’t said yes yet.

  “Now if I do this for you,” said Jinx, “you owe me.”

  “You got it, man. Anything.”

  “You need to come clean with me,” he said, eyes burning with intensity. “I want to know what you’re hiding. I want to know why you left the NFL.”

  I told him I’d tell him everything once the case was over. I was lying, of course, but in my defense, I was only trying to protect him and his family from harm.

  It took another thirty minutes for Donald to finish up things at the precinct before the three of us headed out to the parking lot. The plan was to go in separate cars to the DA’s office. Donald’s Cadillac was right up front while my Mustang was fifty yards away in the outer third of the lot.

  On the adjacent street, the windows of a black SUV hybrid rolled down and a barrel of an AK appeared in each frame.

  It was dark, but I noticed the vehicle as if it were moving in slow motion. At that point, I was opening the passenger door for Bai. This is when the first round of bullets zipped across the lot.

  I instinctively pulled Bai to the ground. The sound of metal scraping metal filled the night air.

  Bai let out a scream.

  Donald Jinx was starting his car when he first heard gunfire. He quickly reacted by reaching back and unlocking the rear driver’s seat door and flinging it open. He squatted behind the door while drawing his Beretta.

  Several stray bullets had impacted the brick wall behind him.

  “Johnny! You okay?!”

  “We’re good!” I yelled back.

  Once Jinx gained visual confirmation that Bai and I were out of harm’s way, he took a shot at the rear passenger window.

  It clanked just south of the opening, but caused the rear gunner to lurch backward into his seat.

  The SUV switched to hover mode and accelerated forward like a jet. In two seconds, it was gone from view.

  Jinx sprinted toward our position.

  Everybody was good. A little shaken, but we still had our heads on our shoulders. I was royally pissed about my paint job being chipped, though.

  Fuckers had no respect for the classics.

  Twelve

  BACK AT THE STATION, Jinx filed the paperwork pertaining to our little meet and greet in the parking lot. Bai and I were hanging out in the lounge sipping tea. When he was finished, we followed him down the hallway to the main department floor.

  Detective Daniel Rodriguez was leaning against his desk when we walked by. He was smirking, so I knew the rascal was up to something.

  “Hey Jo,” said Rodriguez, the dumbass expression still on his face.

  The three of us stopped.

  “Yeah?”

  Rodriguez crossed his arms. “I think my ninety year-old neighbor may be making two-dollar counterfeit coupons for Sack & Save on her computer.” He raised and lowe
red his eyebrows.

  I said nothing. I was waiting for the punch line.

  “Yeah, I was thinking you may want to get on the case and crack this bad boy open before SWAT has to get in there.” His smile upgraded from mischievous to ball buster. “That’s what you PI guys do, right?”

  The typically loud and chaotic precinct had lowered to just under a whisper. Nobody wanted to miss this exchange.

  Without a single pause, I said: “That’s funny that you mention that, Rodriguez,” I said, donning a smile of my own. “Just last week, I got a call about someone in a Chewbacca costume who was disturbing the peace.”

  Rodriguez’s head tilted to one side like a Border Collie.

  “It turns out it was your mom walking around naked in her house. Apparently, she’s got a bush like a Wookiee.”

  A bunch of oohs and laughter ensued. Even Donald couldn’t help but laugh. My sense of humor had always cracked him up. However inappropriate it was.

  “Damn, you took it to a weird place, Jo,” said Rodriguez, shaking his head to get the image I painted out his mind. “A sick, sick place, man.”

  Having Donnie with us reduced the amount of security we had to trudge through. We made our way to the fourth floor where the District Attorney’s office was located. Patricia was sitting at her desk and taking a call when we approached the window. She waved us in.

  We each took a seat. I looked around the room. It was what you might expect to see in a DA’s office. The only distinguishing features were Patti’s name on her law degree and license framed and mounted against the wall behind her, and an eight-by-ten picture of her and her mom on her desk.

  She hung up the phone. I introduced her to Bai Ray and relayed the event that had transpired in the parking lot of my office. Donald then proceeded to fill her in regarding the attack that took place in the parking lot of his office.

  Man, I should avoid lots of any kind, for a while.

  Patricia looked at Bai, sizing her up, no doubt. If Donald knew who she was, then it was a safe bet that Patti knew as well.

  “Unfortunately, I have nothing to go off of here that would give me any legal grounds to warrant the use of a safe house,” she said.