02 Outwitted

by Beth Solheim

  "I read the article." Sadie said. "At least they determined it wasn't foul play. The coroner shipped her body down to St. Paul for an autopsy and the funeral will be in Minneapolis where her grandmother lives."

  "Poor Pete. First he lost custody of his daughter and now he has to deal with this." Jane released a sigh heavy with empathy.

  Sadie crossed over to the mirror and pursed her lips. She dabbed at the excess lipstick before turning to Jane. "Don't you think this makes me look younger?"

  "Younger? No. You know who you remind me of in that lipstick? You remind me of Hollywood. Remember her?"

  "That's the same thing you said last time I bought new lipstick. I didn't like your comment then either. Hollywood's pasty makeup made her look like a cadaver with lipstick."

  Jane smiled. "E-x-a-c-t-l-y. Now you know what I think about your lipstick." She turned the burner up under the soup kettle.

  "For your information, I bought this color to go with my purple mini skirt."

  "If you're wearing it to the Fertile Turtle tonight, I'm not going."

  "Why? All the old ladies wear purple. It's what they're supposed to wear."

  "Not when they bend over and don't have on underwear."

  "I'm wearing underwear. I'm wearing a purple thong."

  "Oh good Lord," Jed muttered, turning away from Sadie's exposed buttocks. "Why can't you dress like a respectable adult? Look how professional Jane looks."

  "I'm not going to dress like Jane. I happen to like color."

  "Who are you talking to? Is Jed here?" Jane put her hands on her hips and glowered at her chair. "He better not be sitting on my chair with his bare ass."

  "How come Jane lets you sit on her chair with a bare butt, but I can't?" Jed tugged his hospital gown down around his hips.

  "Because she hasn't added up the numbers yet," Sadie whispered, tapping her temple.

  Turning her back on Sadie, Jane picked up a wooden spoon and slammed it into the stock pot. "I worked all day on this soup, and you can't even come home on time for supper."

  "Somebody's cranky," Sadie said.

  "I'm not cranky. I'm a nervous wreck." Jane shook the spoon at Sadie. "You made Aanders keep an eye on Sally while you helped Nan at the mortuary. She's a handful. Aanders darted around this cabin all afternoon, slamming doors and hollering while he tried to keep track of her." Jane sank into her chair. "I can't take much more of this."

  "Where are they now?" Sadie watched Jed frown as he walked over to the window.

  Jane groaned. "Why do you ask, you know I can't see her."

  Sadie dipped a teaspoon into Jane's stock pot and took a sip. "What is this?"

  "Oxtail soup." Jane placed two bowls on the table and a third bowl for Mr. Bakke.

  Sadie had hoped Jane's grieving ritual would have diminished by now, but it hadn't. At least she'd quit putting food on Mr. Bakke's plate. Belly had gained nine pounds since Jane's best friend and love had passed.

  Belly's toenails clicked against the wooden floor while he begged for a sample.

  "You're not serving swinging sirloin again, are you? I'm tired of eating rear end."

  Jed shifted in his chair and rubbed his eyes with two index fingers.

  "Are you tired, Jed?" Sadie placed her hand on his shoulder.

  "I must be. I'm seeing things." Jed leaned closer to the window.

  "You're probably losing your stamina. That's not uncommon at this stage."

  "I hope that's what it is." Jed craned his neck forward and gazed more intently through the window. "I don't believe it."

  "What?"

  "That looks like Clay going into Cabin 12."

  "What? It can't be." Sadie joined Jed as he strode to the window. "Good grief, it is. What's he doing in Pinecone Landing?"

  "What's going on?" Jane pulled the curtain aside and followed Sadie's gaze. "Is that Clay? Does Nan know he's back? If she doesn't, she's going to have a conniption."

  Three raps against the screen door interrupted the trio's concentration.

  "Sadie?" The resort manager's voice faltered. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

  Sadie waved him in. The manager blurted, "I made a mistake. A big mistake." He tiptoed quietly across the wooden flooring as if a silent approach would make him invisible. He joined them at the window.

  "Are you sure it's Clay Harren?" Jane looked back toward Cabin 12. "I don't' remember Clay looking so heavy."

  Eight disbelieving eyes watched Clay lift a second box out of his trunk and carry it into Cabin 12.

  "I'm afraid so." The manager backed away from the window and cleared his throat. "I didn't realize it would be Clay who would occupy Cabin 12 when I signed the contract."

  Jane removed her glasses and wiped them on her apron. She slid the bows back over her ears and leaned closer to the window. "What do you mean you didn't know it was Clay? He doesn't look tremendously different. How long has it been since you've seen him?"

  "Clay didn't sign the contract."

  Jed and the Witt sisters stared at the manager.

  "Well?" Sadie's shrill remark caused the manager's elbows to jerk at his sides.

  His Adam's apple rose slowly and sank. "Judge Kimmer signed the contract and paid for a year in advance. He said he wanted to rent it for a friend."

  "A friend," Jane cried. "Since when is Clay a friend of Kimmer?"

  Echoes of foreboding ping-ponged back and forth between the sisters.

  "I'm sorry. I had no idea. If I'd have known, I wouldn't have signed the lease." A pallor of remorse dulled the manager's expression.

  "Can't you cancel the lease?" Jed returned to the table. "Tell Kimmer someone else already rented it."

  "Call Kimmer and tell him it's a mistake," Sadie said. "Tell him you already rented it to another party. We've got to get Clay out of there before Nan finds out."

  Jane dropped into her chair. She rubbed her index fingers against her temples. "I bet this is what Kimmer meant by bringing in reinforcements. He thinks we'll sell Cabin 12 just to get rid of Clay."

  "Then he's mistaken." Sadie pointed at Jane. "You just sat on Jed."

  Jane jumped out of her chair as the manager peered around Sadie and stared at the empty seat. He looked at Sadie and back at Jane.

  Jane drew in a deep breath and set her jaw before noticing the manager's wide-eyed stare. She looked over the top of her glasses at her sister. "Somebody better be making their way toward the towel."

  Puzzled, the manager inched toward the chair with the towel.

  "Not you," Jane said. "You can sit over there."

  Sadie paced the kitchen floor. "Go back to the lodge. Call Kimmer and tell him we're cancelling the lease."

  "I already tried." The manager peered at the empty chair under the clock. "Judge Kimmer said he had a signed contract and we couldn't get out of it. He said he'd sue if we tried."

  "That rat!" Sadie swallowed hard. The bitter taste of hatred stung her throat.

  "How are you going to tell Nan?"

  "Me?" Sadie shot Jane the evil eye. "Why do I always have to bear the bad news?"

  "Because you're always in trouble."

  The manager shifted his eyes from his lap to look at Sadie and dropped them back again.

  Sadie gestured frantically. "This is going to devastate Lon. He loathes his cousin. It will end his romance with Nan." Sadie ran her hands through her spiked hair, dislodging an earring. She tried to catch it as it bounced off her shoulder. It skittered across the floor. She crossed the planking and bent to pick it up.

  "Dear Lord," Jed said.

  "Oh geez." The manager grimaced, looking even harder at the bony butt pointing at him. "You've got a tattoo?"

  Sadie put her hand on her left cheek. "You mean this?" She pointed at the array of colors.

  "What is it?" The manger grimaced again.

  Sadie placed her hands on her hips. "It's Paul Bunyan."

  "It is?" The manager wrinkled his nose. "Why would you put Paul Bunyan down there?"

&
nbsp; "I needed a tattoo to cover my birthmark. I had to choose between two large tattoos and I didn't want Oinketta the Wonder Pig following me around forever." Sadie waited for the manager's reply as she watched Jed shake his head. "It's bad enough Oinketta's brother is trying to buy Cabin 12. I didn't need her on my ass, too."

  Sadie appreciated her manager's capabilities when it came to running the resort. Anal to a fault, he'd make a good match for Jane if he wasn't thirty-five years too young. Sadly, his preference for cleanliness and minuscule details had squelched his sense of humor. Dipped it into the minus column.

  "They make Oinketta tattoos?" The manager's upper lip skewed up to meet his nose as he stared at Sadie in disbelief.

  Sadie had the urge to hand the manager a leaf of lettuce. He looked like a rabbit with his large front teeth exposed.

  The manager jammed his hands into his pockets. "Speaking of Oinketta, she accompanied Kimmer when he signed the lease."

  "Oinketta was here?" Sadie and Jane looked at one another.

  "The cops took Oinketta's driver's license away," the manager said. "I heard Kimmer gives her a ride to town now and then. Maybe that's all it was."

  "I doubt it." Foreboding darkened Sadie's expression. "She'd do anything to coattail her brother's authority. Every time she sees us she rubs in the fact he's a judge."

  "I didn't know she'd lost her license," Jane said. "That must be why she drives down the highway on her riding mower."

  "That's what happens when your car crashes through the church wall and ends up in the elevator shaft." The manager chuckled. "I'd have given a free month's rent to see how the firemen hoisted her car out of the pit."

  Glancing at his watch, the manager reached for the door. "We've got guests coming in a few minutes. I'd better get back to the lodge."

  "I just realized we're missing the obvious." Jed watched the manager cross the lawn. "I'm supposed to figure out what held me back. I think my unfinished business has something to do with Clay. If he's still drinking, maybe I'm supposed to scare him straight."

  "That isn't possible." Sadie waved her hand in dismissal. "Nobody can scare Clay straight. You can't unpickle his brain."

  "Don't' be so sure. I'm the one who has to figure it out. I'm the one who's dead."

  Sadie didn't like Jed's wry challenge. Most crossers lingered in denial. Not Jed. He acknowledged his demise. He also cleverly avoided tackling his decision by making others his priority. First Sally. Now Clay. But not his sister. That conflicted with Jed's original insistence the sheriff keep Celeste's case open after it had been declared a cold case.

  Sadie tapped a manicured fingernail on the table. "You've got one issue to solve and it's to find out what happened to Celeste." She grabbed his fist as he rose from the chair. "Sit down, Jed. You've skirted this issue long enough. You owe it to Celeste. Something happened to her and you need to figure it out."

  Sadie opened the drawer on the sideboard, pulled out a pad of paper and a pen. She handed it to Jed. "Start writing."

  "Start writing what?"

  "Start with the year before her disappearance and make notes. Where did she work? Who did she date? Did anything odd happen you know about?"

  "While you're writing, Jane and I have to figure out why Kimmer rented Cabin 12. That scares me."

  10

  "Did you really let Jed put his own makeup on after you embalmed him?"

  "Sure. Why not?" Impatience etched Sadie's face as she watched her sister. "He knows he's dead."

  Jane grasped the neck of her blouse and fanned it against the clinging heat. "That's a bit morbid, isn't it?" She pulled the rotating fan close to the kitchen table before pressing the on button.

  "I let him select his own clothes, too. His folks brought a couple shirts when they met with Nan. He picked his favorite."

  "What about pants?"

  "We rarely put pants on the deceased," Sadie said. "No one realizes it because it's hidden below the casket's lower lid." The corner of Sadie's mouth twitched upward as she watched Jane mull her comment.

  "You're kidding. That's disgusting. You better put pants on me. I'm not going to meet my maker naked from the waist down."

  Jane glared at her sister, crossed her arms, and pressed her back into the chair rungs. The glare eased into compassion. "Did Jed see his folks when they came to the mortuary to view his body? I can't imagine seeing them and not being able to tell them he stood next to them."

  "He saw them." A sigh of sorrow escaped as Sadie relived the scene. "There are events too private to be witnessed by bystanders. Jed's encounter with his parents was one of them. At first Jed sobbed in the background while his parents stood over his body. Then he stopped. It seemed he had flipped a fortification switch." Sadie had watched the gentle giant run the back of his fingers down his mother's cheek before he patted his father's shoulder. Pure devotion filled the room. Intrusion had not been Sadie's intent.

  Tears spilled from Jane's eyes and settled on her apron while she listened to Sadie relive the experience.

  "I wanted to shout out and tell Jed's mother how much he loved her. Then Jed touched my arm. 'She knows,' he said. 'She's always known.'"

  The bond linking the twins constricted as the image overwhelmed them. An unbearable loss. An unbearable reality. An unbearable sorrow.

  "That's the second child they've lost." Jane dabbed at her eyes with her apron. "Who's going to take care of them now?"

  "Jed provided for them in his will."

  "That sounds like Jed." Jane's shoulders sagged.

  A loud clap of thunder broke overhead. Jane spread her arms wide in front of the rotating fan. "I hope the rain brings relief."

  Sadie paged through the stack of mail Jane had placed on the bookshelf. "Did my Victoria's Secret catalog come today?"

  "No. If it had, I would have dropped it in a trash barrel on my way back from the mailbox. You've got enough sexy underwear. Why can't you buy regular underwear like I do?"

  "Because I refuse to wear my waistband up under my boobs like you do."

  Jane's hand slid to her stomach. She frowned and pushed at the elastic with her thumb.

  Sadie grabbed her purse. "I'm going to the nursing home to gather Jed and Sally. I'll be right back."

  "I'm going with you." Jane slipped her fingers through the handles on a plastic bag and followed her sister onto the porch.

  "You are?"

  "Someone needs to wipe off the shuttle seats." She held up a spray bottle and a roll of paper towels.

  Jane braced against the dash as Sadie started to pull away from the parking spot. "Wait," she shouted. "There's Aanders."

  Sadie pushed the gear into park.

  Aanders slipped into the back seat. "Thanks for waiting." He ran his fingers along the tufted purple fabric lining the door. "I'm sure glad you bought this hearse from Mom. It's really cool." He stretched his legs across the back seat and nestled into the soft fabric.

  Sadie pulled out onto Witt's Lane.

  "Don't encourage her," Jane grumbled. "It's ridiculous she thought this would make a resort shuttle. How would you like to wait for a shuttle at the airport and a hearse pulls up beside you? That would scare the bejesus out of anyone."

  A huge grin crossed Aanders' face. "Who wouldn't want to ride in a hearse? It has the Witt's End Shuttle sign on the door, so people should understand." Observing Jane's wilting glare, he slunk back against the seat.

  "Is your signal broken?" Sadie jerked at Jane's shrill voice piercing the air.

  "No. Why?" Sadie tested the signal up and down.

  "You didn't signal when you turned onto the road."

  "Signaling is for tourists. I know where I'm going."

  Jane unrolled two paper towels and tore them from the roll. "Did you see the new guest who checked in this morning? When he walks, he looks like a flamingo riding a bicycle. I've never seen such long, skinny legs."

  "What's with you and flamingos? First you criticize my hair color, now you're criticizing a ma
n's legs."

  "You're the one who said I never use my imagination. So I used it. That's exactly what he looks like minus the feathers." Jane jutted her chin in defiance.

  "What cabin is he in?" Aanders cast a wary peek at Sadie.

  "Cabin 6."

  "Have you met him yet?" Sadie returned Aanders' anxious glance.

  "Met him? Why would I meet him? I don't meet all our guests. I suppose you think I'm not being a good host because I didn't meet him." Jane squeezed the spray trigger and a scented mist settled over the paper towel cupped in her hand. She handed the wad to Aanders. "Wipe off the fabric on the back seat."

  "You seem to know a lot about his legs, so I thought you met him," Sadie said.

  "Oh pish posh." A strand of hair escaped from behind Jane's ear as she spritzed another layer of paper towels. "Now where did Jed sit this morning?"

  "He always sits in the same spot in back. Aanders just cleaned it. Now I can hang a sign on the side of the van declaring the shuttle is 'pecker-track free'."

  "Sadie! Shame on you. Aanders shouldn't have to listen to your vulgar comments."

  Aanders tried to stifle a snicker before tucking his chin against his chest.

  "I told you to quit encouraging Sadie." Jane contorted her body to stare at Aanders over the front seat. She clenched her fists behind her elbows as she crossed her arms. "I fibbed."

  "You what?" Sadie looked at her sister.

  "I said I fibbed."

  "A little lie now and then doesn't hurt. What did you lie about?"

  "It wasn't a lie. Just a fib."

  "Okay. What did you fib about?" Sadie set her jaw in anticipation. She guessed Jane had tossed her favorite catalog in the trash after all. Jane had been overly accommodating all morning. Syrupy and clingy. She had even changed Sadie's bed and washed her sheets. One for the history book.

  "I met the flamingo man."

  Aanders' head swiveled from Jane to Sadie.

  Apprehension wafted overhead as Sadie stared at Jane. As Jane sank lower into the passenger seat, Sadie coaxed, "And?"

  "And nothing." Jane tightened her elbows against her fists.

  "Then why mention it? You've met other guests before."

  There it was. Jane's evasive posture. Ignore the question and all will be well. Sadie had put up with this annoying habit for the past six months since Mr. Bakke's death.