Playing the Hand You're Dealt

by Trice Hickman

  Samantha’s mouth said one thing but her heart spoke another. If Brenda discovered that Ed was having an affair she would be livid, and if she learned that it was with the young woman whom she had treated like a daughter and welcomed into her home for summers and holidays over the last eleven years, she’d be devastated. And if she would be hurt, Samantha would be, too.The saying that blood is thicker than water wasn’t a cliché, and even if it were, I didn’t want to test it.

  I knew that I needed to work on getting Ed off of my mind and out of my heart. And the only way to do that was to start dating so I could have a chance at happiness. It was too late for Bradley and me, and it wouldn’t be fair to yo-yo back to him after my declaration last weekend. I knew the dating scene was rough, but I had to have faith that there was someone in this world for me.

  When Tyler double-parked in front of the restaurant, I hopped out and went inside to wait for Samantha while they kissed good-bye. The minute I walked through the door I knew I was going to have a good time. The interior was sleek with the perfect combination of bold colors and modern design. Its trendy location in the Verizon Center/Chinatown area made it a hotspot for people with an urban flair. I walked up to the hostess stand and stood to the side, trying to survey the crowd. It was packed like they were giving away food. A minute later Samantha joined me. “How long’s the wait?” she asked the ultra thin hostess.

  The Kate Moss look-alike studied her seating chart. “About an hour.”

  Just as the hostess was about to put our name on the waiting list, two prime spots opened up at the bar and we made a beeline in that direction. I noticed eyes following us as we glided across the room. I had to admit, Samantha and I looked good. I was sure they all thought she was a model, and as for me, well, I cleaned up pretty well. Because I was turning thirty in a few hours I decided to bring it in with a bang and shake things up a bit. My outfit of choice was a simple but ultra-sexy burnt orange halter dress that clung to the curves of my body. I accessorized my look with a pair of bronze-colored stilettos, and large gold and bronze bangles on my wrist.

  E-mi-leee! I heard a familiar voice call out my name. I lit up when I saw Ruben and Roger as we approached the two empty seats. Ruben was smiling from ear to ear, happy to see us. Samantha and I exchanged hugs with them before settling atop our bar stools.

  “You two are the hottest bitches in this place!” Ruben said as he snapped his fingers. Samantha ate up the adulation while I just smiled. Ruben pointed from Samantha to me. “Vogue model and beautiful temptress, that’s what you two are. Absolutely fierce!”

  I laughed. I had never thought of myself as a temptress, but I decided to embrace the compliment and go with the flow.

  “Thank you, cutie. Love your outfit, too.” Samantha smiled.

  As always, Ruben was fashionably dressed in a stylish pair of dark denim jeans, white linen top, and leather sandals—men’s sandals for a change! Roger sat beside him looking just as handsome in a similar outfit, which I was sure Ruben had coordinated. But instead of looking upbeat and happy like his partner, Roger looked bored, as though he were ready to go.

  “You okay, Roger?” I asked.

  He smiled. “I’m fine, just tired from so much travel with the job. It would be great if we could leave at, I don’t know . . . before dawn,” he hinted, nudging Ruben in his side.

  “He’s always tired. Don’t mind him,” Ruben said with a quick wave of his hand, his silver bracelets clanking together as he spoke. Roger just ignored him and smiled. They had been together for so long that they simply accepted each other’s quirks and kept on moving.

  “Well, we’re having a little pre-birthday celebration,” Samantha announced.

  Ruben clasped his hands together with excitement. “Tomorrow’s the big day, and I can’t wait for the faaaaabulous party!”

  Samantha rolled her eyes at the mention of the event.

  “What’s that look all about?” Ruben asked, raising his brow. “Do tell?”

  “I need a drink first,” Samantha said.

  I was with her on that one. “Make that two.”

  Roger raised his hand for the bartender. “Give these ladies whatever they like. It’s their birthday.”

  The bartender made a big deal of it, calling attention to the “two lovely ladies celebrating their birthdays,” as he announced to everyone gathered near the bar. Before we knew it, Samantha and I had so many drinks coming our way we had to share them with Ruben and Roger, which elevated Roger’s spirits considerably.

  An hour and several appetizers and drinks later, I was officially buzzed. I was feeling so good I temporarily forgot about anxiety and forbidden love. But even in my hazy state I realized that something interesting was happening. This was the first time Samantha and I had ever gone out that she hadn’t flirted with every man in sight. Instead, she was wrapped in conversation with Ruben and Roger, explaining the complicated mother/daughter dynamics that led her to roll her eyes. If I had questioned her feelings for Tyler before, she laid them to rest tonight. She wasn’t thinking about any other man except the one who was back at her place, curled up on her couch, waiting for her to come home.

  While the three of them drank and immersed themselves in Samantha’s stories of family drama, I sipped and flirted with a few of the men who’d bought me drinks. I was feeling loose and free, but then my entire night changed when I saw Ed approach the bar.

  “Well, look what we have here.” He smiled.

  Samantha leaped from her stool and gave her father a big hug. “Hey, Daddy!” She threw her arms around Ed’s neck and then reached over toward a tall man standing by his side. “Hey, Uncle Ross!” she squealed like a kid. “When did you get into town?”

  “Your old man picked me up from the airport this morning, and he’s been running me ever since,” her Uncle Ross said. “Matter of fact, I wanted to rest and relax in my hotel room, but Ed insisted on dragging me out tonight.” His playful wink let us know that it was really the other way around.

  I had heard many stories about Ross Morgan over the years. He was Ed’s best friend. They had met in undergrad and became thick as thieves when they both entered Howard Law School. Samantha loved her Uncle Ross, who also happened to be her godfather, and a free spirit just like she was. And from what I’d been able to glean from listening to the stories she’d told me, Uncle Ross had a bit of an edge, which made his stock rise further in Samantha’s eyes. But I think what bonded her to him even more was that they both had contentious relationships with Brenda.

  Unlike Ed, Uncle Ross looked every bit a man in his mid-fifties, but his magnetic smile and high energy balanced out the hands of time. He also had a sexy swagger that could only come from self-assured confidence, which he exuded, just like Ed.

  “Good to see you again, Ed,” Ruben sang out. He was clearly tipsy, as were Samantha and I. Roger was the only sober head in our group, despite devouring several cocktails.

  Ed tipped an imaginary hat in Ruben and Roger’s direction, then introduced them to Uncle Ross. In the meantime I sat on the edge of my seat, my heart beating fast, my palms beginning to sweat.

  Ed turned his attention to me. “Having a good time?”

  I nodded. “Yes, I am.”

  His eyes found mine and locked into place. Over the last few weeks I had become accustomed to catching Ed’s subtle stares that hinted of something more, but tonight it was different. He looked at me the way I imagined he would one of his clients, professional and solidly business. There was also a noticeable shift in his body language, which was surprisingly formal. He folded his arms high across his chest and waited, like he was expecting more than the simple answer I had given him. I may have been buzzed, but not so much that I didn’t know there was something strange about Ed’s mood.

  “And you must be Emily,” Uncle Ross said with a smile. He slid past Ed and took my hand into his. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you. I’ve heard so many wonderful things about you.”

  “Likew
ise.” I nodded, wondering if the words of praise had come from Samantha or her father.

  Uncle Ross ordered a round of celebratory drinks in honor of Samantha and me, and then a short time later, Ruben and Roger bid us good night with hugs and air-kisses for everyone except Ed and Uncle Ross, who both received handshakes. “See you at the party tomorrow night,” Ruben called out on their way to hail a cab.

  As we sat at the bar laughing and talking, I was keenly aware of two things: Ed was completely sober and had not taken a sip of alcohol, and he was ignoring me on purpose. Beyond his initial greeting, he had not uttered another word to me or even looked in my direction, and I couldn’t figure out why. Just the other day he practically seduced me with his stare, but tonight he barely had two words for me.

  I grew annoyed, and my body filled with the same indignation I had experienced my first night in town when he failed to notice or mention my new hairdo. I wasn’t one to brag about myself, but I looked hot tonight. Nearly every man in the restaurant had glanced my way, even Uncle Ross! And each time I went to the restroom I was handed a new business card to slip into my clutch on my way back. Men were salivating over me, but Ed merely looked at me as though I were wrapped in a burka.

  I had told myself that I was going to move on, that I was going to do a little flirting tonight and maybe even set my sites on getting a date out of the evening. But now I was reduced back to the eighteen-year-old girl trying to free her heart from a coffin. I couldn’t stay a minute longer without either exploding or crying. I looked at my watch and leaned over to Samantha. “I think I’m heading home.”

  Samantha looked tired and ready to go, too. “Girl, I’m right behind you.” She yawned, checking her cell phone.

  She’d been drinking her stress away in an attempt to forget about the threat that Carl had made earlier today. I watched as she scrolled through her phone, then a minute later she smiled, sensing my worry. “I’m good. No unknown calls,” she assured me.

  I breathed a sigh of relief. Now I just needed to get home so I could take a shower, lie down, and sort out my feelings.

  “Daddy, can you and Uncle Ross give Emily and me a ride home?” Samantha asked.

  What! I couldn’t be confined inside a moving vehicle with Ed. “That’s okay, I can take a cab,” I said, hopping down from my bar stool.

  Samantha shook her head. “Now, what kind of sense does that make? You’re just a few blocks away from me, we can drop you off.”

  I was quiet as I rode in the backseat with Samantha, who was slumped over with her head on my shoulder, half-asleep. She was tired from work, worn out from her move, but most of all, she was exhausted from dealing with the weight that Carl had put on her mind. After this weekend, and when Tyler was safely back in Atlanta, I planned to have another long and more serious talk with my friend.

  We reached Samantha’s condo first. Ed double-parked, then walked her to her door, making sure she was safely inside. I watched as he walked back to the truck, but then looked away when his eyes caught mine. I shifted against the soft leather seat. A few minutes longer and I’d be free.

  Finally, we turned onto my street. Ed double-parked again and put on his flashers. “You don’t have to walk me to the door, I’m fine,” I told him.

  “Nonsense.”

  I thanked Uncle Ross again for the birthday drinks and told him that I would see him at the party tomorrow night, then I held my breath and quietly walked to my door with Ed by my side.

  “Emily, about tonight . . . I need to explain my actions.”

  My alcohol-induced courage hijacked my sober mind. “You don’t owe me any explanations. The only person you’re accountable to for your actions is your wife.”

  He looked at me like he was genuinely hurt. As much as I wanted to be angry with him and not give a second thought to his feelings, I couldn’t deny mine, which were still centered around a long-held love. I lowered my head, embarrassed by the saltiness of my words. “I’m sorry.”

  “No, I’m the one who’s sorry.” Ed took a deep breath, rubbing his hand against his neck. “Let me explain . . .”

  “It’s okay, really.” The hot, muggy air, multiple margaritas, and hours of pent-up frustration all hit me like a tidal wave. It was one in the morning, and the only thing I wanted to do was lay my head on my pillow. “Good night, Ed. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  I turned my key in the lock, about to push open the door when Ed stopped me. “Happy birthday, Emily.”

  I smiled. “Actually, it’s technically not my birthday until five fourteen.”

  “So that’s when it’s official?”

  I smiled again and nodded.

  “Listen, about tonight,” he tried to continue again.

  “Ed, I’m so tired I can’t think straight, as you can see. Can we have this conversation later?”

  He nodded. “Of course we can.”

  Once I was inside, I looked through my peephole and watched Ed walk to his truck. I was exhausted from my pre-birthday celebration, so I dragged myself up my stairs and fell into bed—sexy dress, stilettos and all. I drifted off to sleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

  Chapter 20

  Ed . . .

  Sucker Punch!

  “You got it bad, my man,” Ross told me.

  We were sitting in my truck under the portico in front of Ross’s hotel, talking about our long day and the tense moments that had just unfolded. More specifically, how those uncomfortable moments involved the beautiful passenger we had dropped off just five minutes ago.

  “Yeah, you can say that again,” I agreed. I leaned back in my seat and thought about all that had transpired and led up to my encounter tonight with Emily.

  After I picked up Ross from the airport earlier this afternoon, he checked into his hotel room before we zipped out for a quick round of golf. Other than women, golf was Ross’s favorite pastime. While we shot holes, I revealed my true feelings for Emily. I had talked about her over the years, and he’d heard his fair share of Emily stories from Sam, but until now, I had never had the balls to completely admit the depths of my emotions for her.

  “You’re fucked,” Ross said as he pulled out his nine iron and eyed the ball. “If you go there with this girl, there’s no good way to recover from it.You’ll have so many women up your ass you won’t be able to take a shit in peace.”

  I frowned, listening to my friend as he continued. “First of all, Brenda will plot murder against you, maybe worse. Sam will definitely catch a case, and might even stop speaking to you for hookin’ up with her best friend. And Emily . . . she’ll want some kind of commitment. So you’ll be jumping from one lockdown straight into another.”

  “But that’s the thing. Being with Emily won’t be like lockdown, it’ll be the freedom I’ve been waiting for.”

  “You’ve been watching Oprah, haven’t you?”

  I hated to admit it, but Ross was right. I was in the middle of what had the potential of turning into a big mess. Still, I had to argue my point. “My marriage is a joke,” I said. “And to be perfectly honest, Brenda would care more about how our divorce would affect her social standing than the actual demise of our relationship.” Hearing myself admit that fact aloud was sobering, but it was true. “And I know that Sam is emotional and can be irrational at times, but she’ll come around. Hell, she’s made enough mistakes not to judge.”

  “Man, I know you don’t really believe what you just said,” Ross replied. “I’m with you on the Brenda thing, but baby girl, that’s a different matter. It’s one thing to tell Sam that you’re screwing another woman and leaving her mother, which actually, I don’t think she’d be too broken up over. But it’s a whole other issue to tell her that you’re doing it with her best friend.”

  “It’s not like Emily and I would be a one-night stand.”

  “Ed, you’re missing the point. What do you think it’ll do to Sam and Emily’s friendship? They’re like you and me, they’re like blood. And let me tell you, if you ever
stepped to my mama,” Ross said, sounding repulsed as he shook his head. “Enough said.”

  I simmered on Ross’s words for the rest of the day and didn’t bring up the subject again until hours later when we were eating dinner at Rosa Mexicano. I knew that Sam would be shocked and more than a little dismayed at the prospect of Emily and me together, but would she be so disappointed and angry that she’d stop speaking to me, and Emily as well? Then I thought about what Ross had said about me stepping to his mother. It made me cringe and forced me to ask myself the same question. If my mother were still alive, how would I feel if he became intimately involved with her?

  The hard truth was that I would definitely have a problem. Ross has had more ass than a toilet seat, so I’d take issue if he became involved with anyone I cared about, let alone a relative. I loved him like a brother, but the truth was the truth. I, on the other hand, while not perfect, didn’t qualify in the dog category like my man. I hoped my daughter knew me well enough to understand that I wouldn’t become involved with Emily unless I was really serious. It wouldn’t be some kind of fly-by-night fling.

  “Ross,” I said, wanting to drive my point home and solidly win my case. “Once Sam realizes that I have genuine feelings for Emily, she’ll understand.We’ve always had a great relationship and we can talk about anything. I know it’ll be awkward at first, but she’ll come around.”

  Ross chewed slowly, thinking over what I’d just said. “Okay, let’s take Sam, and for that matter, Brenda, too, completely off the table. Let’s just deal with Emily.”

  I nodded, knowing that he was getting ready to hit me with a new angle. “All right.”

  “Going strictly by what you’ve told me, you and Emily have never had a conversation about how you feel about each other, right?”