Five Minutes to Love

by Jennifer Wilck

  Meryl held the first item: a certificate entitling the bearer to a three-day weekend in the Hamptons, including guest lodging at a private estate on the ocean, golf and tennis privileges at one of its premier country clubs, a private winery tour for two, and dinners at two of the area’s most famous restaurants. Bidding started at $5,000. The winner paid $25,000.

  The next item was a private dinner for four cooked by Emeril Legasse at the winner’s home, with a wine steward and world-renowned French pastry chef. The opening bid was $10,000. It sold for $50,000.

  Despite her mood, Aviva was astounded at how easily items sold. She craned her neck to see who bid. She found many hands raised for each item up for auction throughout the event, as coveted spots in private schools, weeklong vacations, luxury cars and boats, theater experiences, and more were auctioned off. Aviva could almost feel her jaw drop.

  Yet Jacob remained unfazed. It was if he belonged in this world of the über rich, as if the lifestyle John enticed him with sank into his pores. He could be a part of this life. From his reaction, or lack of one, maybe he already was.

  By the time the auction ended and dessert was served, Aviva’s stomach was heavy, as if she’d already eaten more than she could fit into her body. She picked at her Schaum torte without actually tasting it.

  “Are you sure you’re all right?” Jacob whispered in her ear.

  She gave a half smile. “Yes, I’m just full. Do you want this?”

  With a nod, they switched plates. He dug into her untouched dessert with gusto.

  Russell came over and leaned toward her ear. “Come with me, I’d like to introduce you to our CEO.”

  She followed.

  “Marcus, this is Aviva Shulman, the woman I told you about. She and Meryl are responsible for this evening.”

  Marcus shook her hand. “Aviva, it’s good to meet you. Thanks to your amazing event, we’ve raised more than two hundred fifty thousand dollars for medical research. We couldn’t have done it without you.”

  She nodded wondering when he’d release her hand. “It was my pleasure. I enjoyed working with Russell and Meryl on this. I’m happy it was a success.”

  Marcus handed her a business card. “I’d like to talk to you about some upcoming events we have planned.”

  Aviva took his card. “Meryl and I would be happy to help you.”

  “Good. I think you and I should get together to go over the preliminary details first. I’ll have my secretary call you.”

  He walked away, leaving Aviva staring after him.

  Russell laughed. “Don’t worry, he’s always like that.”

  “Okay, but he really should talk with Meryl too.”

  “You’ll remind him of it when he calls. I’m glad he was taken with you. I think we can continue to do some great work together. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to say good-bye to some people. Thanks again for an amazing night.”

  Russell was right—it was an amazing night. She couldn’t guarantee tomorrow, though.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Jacob stood outside Aviva’s apartment staring at the closed door. He was on the wrong side of it. Instead of standing in the hallway alone, he should be inside with Aviva.

  One look at her in her spectacular dress, and he’d envisioned an after-gala scenario far different than this. It included removing her dress inch by inch, kissing her bare skin and making love to her all evening, with a walk of shame sometime around sunrise. Standing in the hallway, wearing too many clothes and feeling frustrated wasn’t in his event plan. With a sigh, he jammed his hands in his trouser pockets and strode to the elevator. He punched the button and traveled to the lobby, staring at his glossy shoes the entire way.

  By the time he made it home, he was frustrated, tired, angry, and confused as well. Why did she shut him out? What was wrong? Why wouldn’t she tell him?

  He reflected on the evening. She’d seemed nervous, but fine when he arrived to pick her up. Once at the gala, she built a wall of professionalism he’d never witnessed before, but it filled him with pride. He’d put a chink in the wall when he dragged her into the shadows to kiss her. Those kisses softened her for a few moments, whet his appetite for later. Her comments about kissing places and partners turned him on, even as it sparked some jealousy. But she’d left and everything had changed. What happened?

  When she’d joined him and John, talking about his future law position, she’d been quiet. Could it have been the focus on his hours that bothered her? He tried to remember exactly what was said and how she reacted.

  At the table, he’d put his hand on her leg, hoping to reignite the spark from the shadows, but he wasn’t sure if she realized it was there. Sure, she was there in body, but her mind and spirit were far away. When they left? She’d barely spoken a word to him. Just a simple good night at the door. When he suggested he come inside, she claimed she was too tired to do anything but go to bed.

  Of course she was tired. It had been an exhausting event. Hell, it had been an exhausting week for her. But fatigue wasn’t stopping her from letting him in. Something else was. He was determined to find out.

  He dialed her number, but it went straight to voicemail.

  “It’s Aviva. Sorry I missed your call. Please leave a message.”

  “Aviva, it’s Jacob. Are you okay? Call me.”

  Placing his phone on the dresser, he undressed and got ready for bed. As he climbed into bed, he checked the phone for the last time, but there was nothing. He texted her.

  —hey, what’s up?—

  He stared at the screen for five minutes, but she didn’t respond. With a sigh, he put the phone on the nightstand and turned out the light. He’d give her tonight, but tomorrow he would get some answers.

  ****

  Aviva awoke to her buzzing phone. Before she reached for it, she knew it would be Jacob. It was. Multiple texts, starting last night:

  —hey, what’s up?—

  —r u okay?—

  —please answer me—

  —i need to see u—

  —i’m coming over—

  She sat in bed and typed her response:

  —meet @ coffee shop—

  —10 minutes?—

  —40—

  —k—

  She scrubbed her face free of leftover makeup. She splashed it with cold water to try to get the swelling down, but a night full of tears had done damage. There was no way he’d miss it. He was too observant. Throwing on jeans shorts and a T-shirt, she stuffed her feet into flip-flops—those heels last night hurt—grabbed her purse and left the apartment.

  Jacob stood outside the coffee shop, the one they thought of as theirs. His forehead was wrinkled. He scanned the sidewalk looking for her. His face cleared as soon as he spotted her, but at her approach, his frown returned.

  She took deep breath. “Hi.”

  “Hi.” He leaned forward to give her a kiss, and she turned and gave him her cheek. “I was worried about you. Is everything okay?”

  The hostess waved them to an empty table. The waitress appeared with a coffee carafe. Both nodded, and she poured and left them alone.

  “Not really.”

  He took both her hands in his. “Tell me what’s wrong. I thought the gala was fantastic.”

  “It was. It’s not that.”

  He swore under his breath. “Did John freak you out? I knew he did. Listen, Aviva, it’s not going to be…”

  “Jacob, stop. It’s not John. I mean, it is, but it’s not. There’s always going to be a John, whether it’s him or someone else. I can’t compete with that.”

  “Compete? What do you mean? There’s no competition.”

  She chewed her bottom lip. “I can’t compete with your dream, Jacob.”

  “What are you talking about? The hours? Sure, they’ll be long in the beginning…”

  “You don’t understand me, Jacob. Your dream is to be a big, high-powered attorney. You’ll be amazing at it. I watched you when you talked to John. There was
a light about you I can’t even explain. Sure, the hours will be long, but your attention will always be on your work, as it should be. I know the environment, Jacob. I’ve lived with it. I watched my mom live with it. It never stops. I can’t live that life.”

  “Is this about your dad? I’ve told you over and over I’m not like him. I showed you how different I am from him.”

  She placed a hand over his. “I know you did, Jacob, but your dream is the same. Maybe you’re a different person than he is, but you’ll always be drawn to that high-powered life. I can’t, and I won’t, stop you from trying a case in front of the Supreme Court! I don’t want to be that kind of girlfriend, but I don’t want that kind of boyfriend, either.”

  He reared back in his chair. “Are you serious?”

  She nodded as numbness spread throughout her body. She felt like she was getting a buzz, but the only thing in her coffee was milk.

  Jacob’s chair screeched as he pushed away from the table. He stalked out.

  Aviva closed her eyes. She wanted to call him back. She wanted to run after him. But she couldn’t. He needed to make a choice. This time, it couldn’t be her.

  ****

  Jacob’s breathing was labored. His chest was on fire. At the corner of James Street and University Avenue, he bent over, hands braced on his knees. He tried to catch his breath as he and Adam waited for the light to change. Adam had decided they needed to get into shape—too many days and nights studying and eating crappy food had taken their toll—and he’d chosen running, dragging Jacob along with him. It had been three days since his breakup with Aviva. Jacob tried to protest, but Adam hadn’t listened. He simply pushed him into the hallway and only allowed him to turn around to don shorts and running shoes before pushing and prodding him along on the sidewalk. Too depressed to care, it was easier to go along with Adam’s wishes. However, an inability to draw in enough oxygen and Jacob started to think holed up in his dark room, surrounded by stale pizza would be an improvement over this.

  “I’m done,” he gasped, right before the light changed.

  “No, you’re not.” Adam pulled him off the curb. It was either cooperate and move his feet, or land on his face in the middle of the intersection. He didn’t think “road kill” was high on the “Jewish Mother’s List of Their Kindelah’s Achievements,” so he forced one foot in front of the other. He plotted ways to kill Adam in his sleep.

  After what seemed like ages, they stopped. Jacob sank onto the nearest bench. He forced his head between his knees.

  “That was pretty good for your first time, Jake. You’ll feel much better after we do this for a few weeks.”

  It took Jacob a few seconds to register Adam had spoken. It took several more until he could control his breathing long enough to speak. “You’re out of your effing mind.”

  Adam laughed. Jacob would have gotten angry his friend was laughing at his obvious misfortune except he was amazed he had enough breath to laugh.

  “Come on. This run was good for you.”

  “Are you insane?”

  Adam stretched. He fixed Jacob with a knowing stare. “Tell me what you thought about on the run.”

  “All the different ways to kill you.”

  “Exactly.”

  Too tired to parse out what Adam was talking about, he stared at him.

  “You spent all your time thinking of ways to kill me, rather than moping about Aviva.”

  Hearing her name was like getting hit in the chest with a fastball. Once again, Jacob struggled to breathe. He tried to hide it by drinking from the bottle of water Adam tossed him. He had difficulty swallowing. Yeah, he’d been distracted. But if jogging was what it took to get Aviva off his mind, he really might die.

  “You don’t have to kill me.”

  “No, but if that’s what it takes to get you out of your room, maybe I do.”

  Should he talk to Adam? Aviva was the only person he’d ever confided in before, but she wasn’t an option any longer. Maybe Adam could help him. “I’m pissed at her. She has no faith in me, no matter how many times I showed her I was different from her father. I showed her. Her father’s an ass. I’m not like that. I can’t believe she compares me to him.”

  Adam clapped him on the shoulder. “I’m sorry, Jake, that’s a tough one. But think of it this way. You’ll meet lots of women when you start your job next week, ones you’ll have more in common with. So maybe this was a good thing.”

  As he hauled himself off the bench, he followed Adam on rubbery legs to their apartment. He thought about what Adam said. He couldn’t possibly meet anyone better than Aviva.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Jacob stared bleary-eyed at the computer screen. The lines blurred and swirled before him. All the As swirled like Aviva’s. He blinked. His fourth night in a row working until two in the morning. Technically, it was his twentieth, as he hadn’t gotten home before four since he started here a month ago. Reaching blindly for his sixth—was it his sixth? Maybe it was his seventh?—ultra-large sized cup of iced coffee, he chugged it and wiped his mouth. Around him, muted conversations buzzed, punctuated by the occasional thump as another exhausted first year associate’s head hit the desk. Usually, the person would wake up, mutter or groan and get to work. Occasionally, they’d be so tired they’d sleep right through, sometimes until morning. There had been more than one occasion when Jacob passed an associate leaving, yesterday’s clothes rumpled, his or her face stained with drool, as Jacob was coming in for the day. They’d nod, not even embarrassed anymore. Embarrassment took too much effort. All of the first years’ efforts were focused on survival.

  Survival. That was something you did on a deserted island, or after an accident or trauma. It wasn’t something you should have to associate with your job, especially when you were twenty-five. Visions of Aviva’s face filled with recrimination, flitted through his brain. He was losing it.

  “Hey, wake up! We’re going out. You’re coming with.”

  Jacob jumped at the sound of Chuck’s voice. Chuck was also a first-year associate, a stereotypical frat boy. He had appointed himself the cruise director on this “ship from hell,” as he called it. He always came up with ways to entertain everyone. Jacob spent half the time wondering how the heck he didn’t get fired. But he’d read some of his briefs. They were brilliant, so maybe they saved his ass.

  He shook his head. “Going out? Where the hell are you going at two in the morning?”

  “Last call is in an hour. There’s a bar across the street a little ways. If we hurry, we can make it.”

  “Sorry, I can’t. Too much work.”

  Chuck closed Jacob’s books. “There will always be too much work. It’ll still be here later. Let’s go.”

  Too tired to argue and somehow finding logic in his argument, he followed Chuck out of the office. There were four other associates in the bar, all as tired as he was. They gave halfhearted waves as they nursed their beers.

  They made some small talk and discussed their cases. Like Jacob, they had put in inhuman hours for the past month. Like Jacob, they were all single.

  “Do you ever wonder if it’s worth it?” Jacob asked when there was a lull in the conversation.

  “Doesn’t matter if it’s worth it,” said Katie, the blonde on the end. “I have college and law school loans to pay.”

  The others nodded.

  “But there has to be more to law than this.”

  “There is,” said Phil, Jacob’s office mate. “It’s called making partner at thirty.”

  Thirty. Five years from now. Five years of working his ass off like this, alone, with countless days of falling into bed at four in the morning and returning at ten. Great if you were a robot, less if you were human.

  “Come on,” said Chuck. “It’s only the first month. You’ll get used to it.”

  Conversation moved on to the partners they worked for. All agreed Jacob’s boss was by far the best.

  “You lucked out.” Matt was in the firm’s
malpractice division. “Cole is a hard ass. I can’t stand him.”

  Jacob thought about Robin. She was brilliant and passionate about environmental law, but tough. Not unfair, though, if you discounted her motto “work was life.” She had no family. She spent as much time in the office as he did. This was what they thought was lucky?

  “Yeah, but where’s her life? She’s a partner but still at the firm the same number of hours as I am.”

  “That’s much better,” said Katie. “At least she shares the time with you. Mike puts in some time and goes to the golf course. He expects me to have everything ready for him when he gets back. I can’t wait until I have associates under me.”

  The others agreed, but Jacob stayed silent. He didn’t want to make others miserable. Abject misery wasn’t what he’d bargained for. He grabbed his phone to check the time. He started when he saw a voicemail notification. Aviva? As his eyes focused, he identified the sender as his mother. His stomach dropped. He’d barely talked to her since he started working. He hadn’t told her about the breakup.

  “Hello, Jacob, this is your mother. When are you and Aviva coming to Shabbat services with me? Please call me back.”

  He swallowed. Luckily it was too late to respond. Looked like they’d have an interesting conversation. If he ever had time to talk to her.

  ****

  Aviva’s voicemail message notification was highlighted. She frowned. Other than Hannah or her mother, she hadn’t spoken to too many people recently. Tapping her phone, she listened to the message.

  “Hi, Aviva, this is Karen.”

  Aviva’s stomach dropped.

  “I hope you don’t mind my calling, but it’s impossible to get hold of Jacob these days, as I’m sure you know, so I thought I’d call you to find out how things are. Please call me when you have a chance. I’m worried.”