Santa' Wayward Elf

by Paige Tyler

  “What is that terrible noise?” she asked, raising her voice so he could hear her.

  He didn’t answer as he calmly rolled over and thumbed a button on top of a piece of some type of electronic equipment on the bedside table. The terrible noise ceased immediately.

  Derek rolled onto his back to look up at her. “It was the alarm clock. Don’t tell me you don’t have those where you come from, either.”

  Her face colored. “Of course we do. Ours just don’t sound like that.”

  “What do they sound like?”

  “They have a series of soothing tinkling bells that are nice and peaceful. Nothing like that torture device you have. That thing is enough to wake a hibernating polar bear.”

  Derek chuckled and pulled her down for a kiss. She had no problem snuggling up with him again now that her ears weren’t ringing.

  “Why didn’t you use the clock to wake us up yesterday?” she asked.

  “Because I didn’t have to go to work yesterday.”

  Sosie lifted her head from his chest. She’d hoped they would be able to go sightseeing again. “You have to go to work?”

  “Afraid so, babe. I already had two days off and unfortunately, crime doesn’t take much of a holiday, so it’s back to the grind.”

  She threw her leg across his and rubbed his semi-hard cock with the inside of her thigh. “Sure I can’t convince you to stay home and play hooky instead?”

  “Woman, are you attempting to interfere with an officer of the law in the performance of his duty?”

  Regardless of his stern tone, Sosie had the feeling he was teasing her. Since she couldn’t be sure, she decided it might be best if she stopped rubbing her leg against his penis. But when she went to move it, he wrapped his hand around her thigh, pressing it more firmly against his now rock-hard shaft.

  She leaned forward to kiss her way up his chest. “I’m guilty as charged, Detective. Perhaps you should punish me by staying home and making me scream at the top of my lungs for the rest of the day.”

  Derek groaned. “You are a bad girl, aren’t you?” He lifted her leg and slid her over so that she was beside him. “And while I’m tempted, I have to go into work this morning.”

  She gave him a playful pout. “You wouldn’t leave a poor damsel in sexual distress like this and run off to work, would you?”

  “Sexual distress, huh? Well, we can’t have that, can we?”

  With a growl, Derek urged her onto her back, then settled between her legs and drove his cock into her very wet and waiting pussy.

  “I thought you said you had to get to work,” Sosie said, the words coming out in a rush as he drove the breath from her lungs with his fast, hard thrusts.

  She wrapped her arms and legs around him. This wasn’t going to be the same kind of slow, languorous lovemaking like they’d had the night before, but something wild and frantic. Primal. Not that she was complaining. Derek could do this to her as long as she was trapped here in the land of the BPs as far as she was concerned. Which, hopefully, would be for a good long time.

  “I do have to get to work,” he said, bending his head to nuzzle her neck. “But I’m not the kind of guy to leave a woman in sexual distress. Besides, I set the clock early in case I woke up horny.”

  Sosie was pretty sure he hadn’t sprouted horns since last night, but decided it must be another one of the strange phrases BPs used and concentrated on what Derek was doing to her body instead. And right now, he was doing incredible things. Like finding that perfect spot inside her with his cock that sent her tumbling over the edge into oblivion and had her coming so hard she was dizzy from it.

  Afterward, Derek stayed where he was, his breathing ragged, his cock pulsing inside her as the last tremors of orgasm faded. He bent his head to kiss her. A slow, deep kiss that made her moan.

  “Now I really do have to get ready for work.”

  She groaned. “Couldn’t we stay in bed for a little while longer? I’m as tuckered out as a flying reindeer after that.”

  He chuckled. “You can stay in bed and sleep some more. I’m just going to hit the shower, then take off anyway.”

  As much as she wanted to spend the day lazing around in bed, she couldn’t let Derek go off to work without breakfast. Her mother had always told her it was the most important meal of the day. Though they all seemed pretty important to her.

  Throwing back the blanket, Sosie put on the T-shirt Derek had given her to wear that first night and padded barefoot into the kitchen to whip up something while he took a shower. While she would have loved bacon and eggs again, she wasn’t brave enough to try making them. On the other hand, she didn’t want the cold cereal they’d had for breakfast yesterday. That left bread pudding. She could definitely manage bread pudding.

  She was setting the bowls down on the table when Derek walked into the kitchen. He wasn’t wearing jeans today, she noticed. Instead, he had on a pair of tan-colored pants and a dark blue button-up shirt, along with a tie.

  “You look very handsome,” she said.

  He seemed embarrassed by the compliment. “Thanks.” His gaze went to the table. “You made breakfast? You didn’t have to do that.”

  “I wanted to.” She pulled out her chair. “I wasn’t sure how to make bacon and eggs, so I made bread pudding instead. I hope that’s okay.”

  He flashed her a grin as he sat down across the table from her. “That’s fine.”

  Sosie watched eagerly as he spooned some into his mouth. “I put butter, honey, maple syrup and some of those yellow packs of sugar in it along with the milk. What do you think?”

  He shook his head, letting out a chuckle. “I think it’s sweet.”

  She caught her lower lip between her teeth, unable to ignore the pang of hurt she felt at his words. “You don’t like it?”

  “I love it. I mean, it tastes amazing. It’s just that I…um…like to watch what I eat.” His mouth quirked. “No one wants an overweight cop with clogged arteries on the force, right? How could I go out and catch bad guys?”

  Her shoulders sagged. “Oh. I didn’t think of that.”

  She’d completely forgotten BPs dealt with a myriad number of health issues as a result of poor nutrition. Elves didn’t have that problem, which meant they could eat whatever they wanted. She’d have to remember that when she cooked for Derek again. She didn’t want him to be unhealthy.

  She picked up her spoon. “What are you doing at work today?”

  “I’ll probably be catching up on some paperwork this morning, then see if anything new has turned up on any of the cases I’m working. If I’m lucky, one of my informants will have something for me.”

  “Informant. What’s that?”

  Derek looked at her over the rim of his coffee mug. “People who give information to the cops that helps them out on whatever case they’re working.”

  She thought about that. “I see. They’re concerned citizens.”

  “Not exactly. Most of the time, they’re petty criminals who give information on other, not-so-petty criminals in return for the cops looking the other way.”

  She frowned. “That doesn’t seem right. If they’re criminals, shouldn’t they be imprisoned, too?”

  “Yeah, well sometimes you have to let the little fish go in order to catch the bigger fish.” He downed the rest of his coffee in one swallow. “I’ve got to get going.” Pushing back his chair, he got to his feet, then bent to kiss her on the mouth. “Thanks for breakfast.”

  “You’re welcome. Although it probably would have been better if I hadn’t made it so sweet.”

  He kissed her again. “You’ll be here when I get home, right?”

  “Of course.”

  His mouth curved into a sexy smile. “Good.”

  Sosie followed him into the entryway. “Where is your workshop?”

  He chuckled. “It’s called a precinct, not a workshop, and it’s a few blocks over from here.”

  She nodded. Maybe she’d surprise him by stopping by
his precinct later.

  He grabbed a folded leather pouch and a set of keys from the table, shoving them in his pocket. “I know you’re probably eager to meet up with your friends, but you’re more than welcome to stay here for however long you’re in the city. If you want to, I mean.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Of course, I’m sure. In fact, I was kind of hoping you would.”

  “I’d love to.”

  “Good. Feel free to hang around and watch TV if you want, or do some more sightseeing. Be careful if you go out, though. The neighborhood is safe during the day, but you still have to keep your wits about you.” He opened the drawer underneath the table and took out a key. “This is for the door and there’s some money in the cookie jar in the kitchen, in case you want to go shopping for more clothes or something.”

  Sosie didn’t know what to say. Not only had Derek offered to let her stay at his apartment for as long as she liked, but he’d given her a key and told her to use his money, too. Could she have run into a nicer guy? While she didn’t mind staying at his place, she wouldn’t feel right about using his money.

  She was about to tell him as much, but stopped when she saw him shrug into a strange collection of leather straps. She thought at first they were some kind of suspenders designed to hold up his pants like Santa wore, but then she spotted the gun tucked into a pouch on one side. Even though she’d never seen one before, she knew what a gun was and what it was used for. According to The Polar Evening News, every BP owned at least a dozen of them. Since she hadn’t seen one since she got here, she thought the news had been mistaken about that, too. Apparently not. She chewed on her lower lip, worried Derek was taking one to work. Maybe the “organized” criminals he went after were more dangerous than their names implied.

  As he put on his coat, she opened her mouth to confess her fears, but he bent his head to capture her lips with his.

  “Have fun today and don’t get into too much trouble.”

  She didn’t know what kind of trouble he expected her to get into, but she smiled up at him anyway. “I’d have more fun if you spent it with me.”

  Derek chuckled. “It’s tempting, believe me. But if I don’t go now, I’ll never get out of here.” Tilting up her chin, he gave her another kiss. “I’ll see you later, babe.”

  After Derek left, Sosie stood in the entryway. Figgy, she forgot to ask him what time he’d be home. If it was anything like the hours an elf put in at Santa’s workshop, he probably wouldn’t be home until after dark. How was she going to occupy herself all day until he got home?

  She considered his suggestion to do some more sightseeing, but quickly decided against it. After spending the day with Derek yesterday, wandering around the city by herself didn’t seem as if it’d be very much fun. She could always ask Tracee and Linda if they wanted to go with her, she supposed. If they weren’t working. Then again, she’d promised Ben she would take a look at the air conditioning unit while she was here. Maybe she should do that instead.

  Before she did anything, though, she needed to get dressed. Walking around in Derek’s T-shirt probably wouldn’t be a good idea.

  As she passed the huge television in the living room, she stopped. It was much bigger than the one she’d had back home, and according to The Polar Evening News, BPs had hundreds of channels to watch—unlike elves. On impulse, she picked up the remote control from the coffee table and turned it on.

  Since she was unfamiliar with the stations, it took her a while to figure out what she was watching. At first she thought it was a news program because the man talking to the viewers was sitting at a table reporting on something called football, but as she continued to watch, she realized it was a station devoted to nothing but sports. Eager to see what else was available, she went through the channels, pausing to watch each of them for a few minutes before going on to the next. When she came to a show about healthy cooking, she put down the remote control. She watched in fascination as the woman on the screen made a delicious-looking pasta dish. According to the host, it had less fat and calories, which made Sosie think Derek would love it. She couldn’t find anything to write the recipe on, so she had to commit the ingredients to memory.

  Luckily, she was good at that kind of thing. It was like assembling a toy.

  That show went into another, then another, and before she realized it, two hours had gone by. Abruptly remembering she wanted to help Ben, she went into the bedroom to change clothes. She left the television on so she could hear it, though. She didn’t want to miss out on any great recipes.

  After getting dressed, she checked her appearance in the mirror to make sure her long hair was covering her ears. Turning to leave the bedroom, she caught sight of the alarm clock on the bedside table and frowned as she remembered the horrific noise it had made earlier. She chewed on her lower lip. It probably wouldn’t be too hard to adjust so it didn’t screech so terribly. She’d have to remember to ask Ben if she could borrow a few tools.

  Going back into the living room, she shut off the television, then left the apartment, making sure to lock the door with the key Derek had given her.

  Ben opened the door of his apartment as soon as she knocked. “Sosie! I thought you’d be out sightseeing with Derek. Come in.”

  She gave Mabel a wave, then turned to Ben. “Derek had to go to work today, so I thought I’d see if you wanted help with the air conditioning.”

  “That’s mighty nice of you,” Ben said. “I was about to go do the maintenance rounds, but we can take a look at it after that. You’re more than welcome to come with along me if you want. I sure could use the help.”

  Her lips curved. “I’d be happy to.”

  She and Ben spent the next few hours going from one apartment to the next doing minor repairs. The work was easy and fun, and she had a great time meeting all the people she hadn’t met at the Christmas party. When Ben explained she was staying with Derek, more than a few commented on what a great guy he was—which she already knew—and that a woman could do a lot worse than getting “hooked up” with him—which she thought she knew, but wasn’t sure. She smiled and nodded anyway. She had never in her life imagined an elf would be so welcome in the land of the big people. In a lot of ways, she felt more accepted and comfortable here than she had up in the North Pole.

  After she and Ben were finished the repairs, he led her down to the basement to show her the central air unit. Even though she’d never seen one before, she was able to figure out the problem fairly quickly. Ben didn’t have the parts to fix it, however, and wouldn’t be able to get to the store to get them for a few days.

  “Mabel should be getting lunch ready,” Ben said as they walked back into his apartment. “Do you want to join us? A free meal is the least I owe you for all your help this morning.”

  “Actually, I was going to take a walk over to the precinct and see Derek. But thank you, anyway.”

  “I made a fresh batch of cookies,” Mabel said from the kitchen. “I’ll put some in a container, so you can take them to him.”

  “That’s very nice of you. I’m sure Derek will love them.” Sosie looked at Ben. “I don’t suppose you could give me directions to the precinct, could you? Derek said it wasn’t far from here.”

  “I’ll do better than that.” The older man smiled. “I’ll draw you a map.”

  As it turned out, Ben was very good at drawing maps, which made it easy for Sosie to find the precinct where Derek worked. For some reason she thought the place would be more grand since Derek and his fellow detectives did such important work, but it was a rather nondescript gray building with a set of steps leading up to big double doors.

  Reaching up to make sure her hair still covered her ears, she walked up the steps and went inside, only to stop and stare at the strange scene that met her eyes. Half a dozen men dressed up like Santa were cuffed and sitting on a bench along one wall. On the bench across from them were four women similarly restrained and wearing green outfits Sosie assume
d were supposed to be elf garb. Except Sosie had never seen any self-respecting elf dress like these women. They literally had parts of their anatomy falling out of their clothes. It would be completely impossible for an elf to work in an outfit like that. The men dressed as Santa didn’t seem to mind, and were ogling the women in obvious appreciation. She frowned as she looked at the men again. Now that she thought about it, their outfits didn’t look quite right, either. In fact, one of the men didn’t have any pants at all. If it wasn’t for the tiny briefs adorned on the front with a felt Christmas tree, the man’s entire lower body would be naked.

  “Excuse me, ma’am. Can I help you?”

  Sosie dragged her gaze away from the strange group of people to see an older man in a blue uniform sitting at a counter in front of her. She walked over to him.

  “I’m looking for a friend of mine. Derek. He said he worked here.” She held up the plastic container in her hands. “I brought him some cookies.”

  “Derek who?”

  “Derek Clayton. You can’t miss him. He has these amazing biceps and his stomach is so tight you could bounce gum drops off it. Oh, and his eyes absolutely smolder when he’s…”

  The man behind the counter grimaced. “Detective Clayton is in the Organized Crime Division. Third floor, turn left. You can’t miss it.”

  Sosie opened her mouth to thank him, but he’d already directed his attention back to the clipboard in his hand. Murmuring a quick word of thanks anyway, she started to walk away, but then stopped and turned back to him.

  “Um, excuse me. I’m curious about something.” She pointed at the men and women sitting on the benches. “What did they do wrong? Is parading around as half-naked Christmas figures a crime in New York?”

  The man gave her a wry smile. “Only when they do it in the middle of Times Square and proceed to put on their own sex-filled version of ’Twas the Night Before Christmas while every car and tourist in town stops to watch and take pictures. They backed up traffic all the way to the tunnels.”