The Shadow's Heart

by K J Taylor

  Two slaves walked beside Kullervo and Senneck, shading them, while the third went ahead to lead the way. People always moved aside for a griffin, sometimes if only because people who didn’t move aside were liable to get bitten, but here they stood back with much more reverence than Kullervo had seen in Cymria, bowing and murmuring in their own language. Some even held up their hands toward Senneck, as if they were asking her for something. Naturally, she ignored them completely.

  The slave led them through the winding streets, past the odd flat-roofed houses and through a marketplace, where Kullervo and Senneck were both happy to dawdle a while and see all the unfamiliar things that were for sale. Pots, clothes, food, spices, wood carvings … Kullervo bought one of those last, and pocketed it to take home for Laela. When Senneck looked at him reproachfully, he bought a lump of roasted meat as well and tossed it into her waiting beak.

  Up on the top of the hill that overlooked the city, they found the Sun Temple. It was a beautiful building, made in the Amorani style like the palace below it, with a great domed roof. But this roof was coated in gold, which, combined with the white stone of the rest of the building, made the temple almost glow in the early morning sun.

  The front entrance was huge and grand, with no gate or door in sight. On either side were a pair of humans carved into the stone in reverent postures with their heads bowed. Two griffins stood on their backs, talons reaching upward to make the lintel, and above them was the face of a smiling man with big, almond-shaped eyes. The face had been coated in gold as well, and the eyes were yellow gemstones.

  Senneck sat on her haunches to take all of this in. ‘Ah, the mighty power of humans makes such beautiful things,’ she said. ‘Have you seen anything like this before, Kullervo?’

  Kullervo found his voice again. ‘Never. It’s amazing! I wonder what it’s like inside.’

  ‘We will find out,’ said Senneck, getting up to go through. On either side, the slaves moved away. They didn’t try to follow when Kullervo went inside.

  The interior of the temple was nearly all white. The stone, the carvings, the tiles, everything. Only the red mats on the floor stood out. Those, and the statue at the far end.

  The walls of the temple were lined with archways that had no doors, only yellow and blue cloth hangings that billowed gently in the wind. It meant that the temple was full of sunlight, and all of it seemed to focus on the statue.

  It was a statue of a man, larger than life sized, and covered in pure gold. He held a bowl in his outstretched hands, with a fire burning inside it that threw more light onto his blue gemstone eyes, making them flicker with something that looked eerily like awareness.

  Senneck gave a long, soft hiss. ‘By my wings …’

  Kullervo said nothing. He approached the statue cautiously, almost as if he expected it to come to life. When he came too close, he stumbled.

  ‘Are you hurt?’ Senneck asked at once.

  Kullervo winced, but shook his head.

  When they reached the statue, Senneck stretched out her neck and nibbled at the gold gently.

  Kullervo kept well back. ‘Do you think it’s all gold?’ he asked, sounding a little strained.

  ‘I do not know,’ said Senneck. She moved back to her partner’s side. ‘This must be the human these ones worship.’

  ‘Xanathus,’ said Kullervo. ‘Gryphus. They’re one and the same, Laela says.’

  Senneck looked at him. ‘Are you certain that you are not hurt? You do not look well.’

  Kullervo grimaced. ‘I don’t feel that well.’

  ‘Do you need food? Rest?’

  ‘I don’t think so.’ Kullervo shifted. ‘I just feel … odd. Uncomfortable.’ He took a step back. ‘Scared.’

  ‘Of what? There is nothing here.’

  Kullervo shook himself. ‘You’re right.’ He went toward the statue, reaching out to touch it. But when his fingers were about to brush its surface, he pulled away and darted back to Senneck. ‘I want to leave,’ he said in a rush.

  Senneck turned around, raising her tail aggressively. ‘What is this? What is wrong with you?’

  ‘I don’t know,’ Kullervo said in a panicky voice. ‘I have to get out of here. I don’t like it. It feels wrong.’

  ‘Do not be a coward.’

  ‘I’m trying not to be …’ Kullervo edged away toward the entrance. Senneck stayed where she was, staring challengingly at him.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ Kullervo said at last. ‘I can’t.’

  He nearly ran out of the temple.

  Senneck followed at a more leisurely pace and found him a little way down the hill, breathing raggedly while the slaves anxiously fanned him.

  ‘What was that?’ Senneck demanded. ‘What were you afraid of?’

  Kullervo took a deep breath. ‘I don’t know. I’m sorry, Senneck. I tried, but … I just couldn’t stand being in there.’

  ‘This is foolish!’ said Senneck, confusion making her irritable. ‘It is a human nest, nothing more.’

  ‘But I feel better now,’ said Kullervo. ‘I started feeling bad the moment I stepped through the door, and the moment I left the feeling went away.’

  Senneck shook her head. ‘We should go back now.’

  ‘Yes.’ Kullervo touched her gently. ‘I’m sorry.’

  ‘Do not say that. It does not matter.’

  Senneck walked back down the hill with him, keeping close to his side. She said nothing and let him talk — about other things than the temple and what had happened in it. Senneck walked slowly, still limping slightly from her old wounds, keeping her eyes on the path ahead. She looked as expressionless as only a griffin could, but behind those eyes she was thinking.

  When they reached their rooms in the palace, Kullervo took his boots and belt off and lay down on his bed. Senneck settled down nearby and groomed herself. When she had smoothed down the last feather, she lay on her own pallet and rested her head on her talons.

  After a short while, she lifted it again. ‘Kullervo, there is something I must tell you.’

  He sat up at once. ‘What is it?’

  Her blue eyes were fierce. ‘I knew your father. You know this. I fought against him. I saw his powers for myself.’

  ‘I know,’ said Kullervo.

  ‘You know,’ Senneck agreed. ‘I saw his powers, and I saw his weaknesses as well.’ She lifted a forepaw and slowly scratched her neck. ‘Long ago, just before the war began, your father was arrested. For his crimes, he was hanged. In Malvern, in front of the Eyrie where you and I live. I witnessed the execution, along with Erian and many others. We thought he had been dealt with that day. But he rose again. Only moments after the hanging, before he could be carted away, he rose again. He went after Erian. He tried to kill him, and I was not there to protect him. Erian would have died that day, but he found shelter. He hid in the one place that Kraeai kran ae could not follow.’

  ‘Where?’ asked Kullervo.

  ‘In the Sun Temple. Malvern’s own temple. It is not there now; Kraeai kran ae had it destroyed after the war. He hated it, and all sun temples — and for good reason. I did not see it myself, but Erian told me. Your father — Kraeai kran ae — could not enter one, not without suffering terrible pain. If he went inside, he would lose his powers and be weakened. Until now, I have not been certain if this was true. Today I have found a reason to be certain.’

  ‘What reason?’

  ‘You, Kullervo.’ Senneck nibbled her talon nervously. ‘You are the son of Kraeai kran ae, conceived after he was given his powers. Your sister was made before then, when he was only a mortal man, but you … you were the son of Kraeai kran ae, and you have inherited something from him. You have the dark power, Kullervo.’

  Kullervo’s heart froze. ‘I don’t! Don’t say that, Senneck. I’m not like him.’

  Senneck did not look away. ‘You are, Kullervo. You have not seen it in yourself yet, but I have. You look like him. And you have his power, or a touch of it.’

  The room was
warm, but Kullervo suddenly felt very cold. He hunched down, clutching his upper arms. ‘I don’t. Stop it.’

  ‘You pulled Saeddryn out of the shadows, when I could not see her,’ Senneck said impatiently. ‘You knew where she was, and you reached into her hiding place without effort. And like your father, you cannot bear to be inside a temple to the sun. The darkness in you makes it hurt. You are the son of Kraeai kran ae, whether you like it or not.’

  Kullervo hunched down even further, trying to hide within himself. A tear ran down his nose. ‘I’m sorry,’ he whispered. ‘I’m so sorry.’

  Senneck stood up. ‘You do not understand. Do not be afraid, Kullervo. This knowledge is a good thing.’

  He looked up. ‘How?’ he shouted. ‘How is it a good thing, if I’m a monster like he was? If I’m … dark too.’ The anger left his voice as quickly as it had come.

  ‘It is a good thing,’ Senneck insisted. ‘You are our weapon, Kullervo. And our knowledge. You can drag our enemy out of the shadows, and you have shown us both the key to defeating her.’

  Kullervo stilled. ‘What key?’

  Senneck turned her head, tilting it to soak up a shaft of light from the window. ‘The sun,’ she said softly.

  NINE

  BORN AGAIN

  Saeddryn turned around again, searching in vain for any sign of another person.

  ‘Arenadd? Where are ye?’

  With you, said the voice by her ear. Always, Saeddryn.

  Still unable to see anything, she stopped moving. ‘Why can’t I see ye?’

  His laugh sounded hollow. There’s nothing to see. I don’t have a body any more.

  Saeddryn’s neck prickled. ‘Are ye a ghost, then?’

  An evil spirit, probably. Here, let me try something …

  Saeddryn’s vision flickered briefly, and she took a step back when she saw something appear in front of her. It looked like a shadow at first, but as it grew as tall as her it lost some of its shape and looked like a faint black mist. The shape that remained looked just barely like the outline of a man standing there.

  Saeddryn reached out. ‘Arenadd … I see ye.’

  The shape vanished abruptly. Don’t tell anyone about me, Arenadd’s voice told her flatly. They won’t see me, or hear me. Only someone with our power can do that.

  ‘I understand.’ Saeddryn wanted to touch him now. She wished his hand were there to hold. ‘Arenadd, what do we do now? Together?’

  The only thing our kind can do, he said. Kill.

  There was no joy, or excitement, or any life in his voice at all. Saeddryn shivered. ‘Arenadd, are ye all right?’ she asked tentatively.

  I’ve never been better, he said, but she had never heard anyone sound so far from it.

  ‘Are ye sure?’ she persisted. ‘Ye don’t sound … right.’

  It’s fine, he told her. I’m different now, that’s all. I’ve learned to love her.

  ‘The Night God?’

  Yes. With all my heart.

  ‘But …’ Saeddryn trailed off, unable to find words for what she was thinking. It was good that Arenadd had learned to love the god the way every true Northerner should, but … but this wasn’t right, not at all.

  ‘Caedmon’s here,’ she said at last, hoping to get a reaction out of him. ‘He looks so much like ye.’

  He’s the true king, Arenadd said, in a voice like death.

  ‘The two of ye fell out,’ Saeddryn persisted, ‘but I know how close ye were before. If things had worked out differently I know ye would have been friends again.’

  I was wrong, said Arenadd, without the slightest change in tone. Caedmon was always my true heir, and you were my true queen.

  ‘Arenadd — ’

  Go to him now, and tell him so, said Arenadd. You serve him now, and I serve you. He will give us a task.

  ‘Later,’ said Saeddryn, feeling ill. ‘He needs some time alone, to think.’

  Of course, said Arenadd.

  He said nothing more after that, and Saeddryn sat down outside her makeshift stone circle and waited in silence while the last of the day dragged out toward night. She had the help she needed now, and she knew she should be feeling grateful toward her master — and glad on behalf of Arenadd, who had finally learned to see sense.

  But despite all her efforts, she felt neither. She had Arenadd back now and he was hers, just as she had always wanted, but he was not Arenadd. Not the Arenadd she remembered. The man she remembered had been angry and passionate, and bitter. He had hated with all his heart, and loved in the same way. He had done his duty even while resenting it, and once he had made his mind up nothing short of a dagger in the chest would change it — and even a dagger would only slow him down for a little while.

  Those were the qualities she had known him for, hated him for, loved him for — and now they were gone. And without them, he was not Arenadd any more.

  Despair welled in her chest.

  She wished, again, that she could find something to say. But there was nothing she could think of that would change anything.

  Come on, now, Arenadd said unexpectedly, and with a hint of gentleness finally showing through the deadness in his voice. It’s time to go to work. There’s nothing to be afraid of. Not for us.

  Saeddryn did not move. ‘Arenadd, what did she do to ye? I want to know.’

  I told you. She taught me the truth.

  ‘That’s not what I mean,’ Saeddryn said sharply. ‘What did she do, Arenadd?’

  She … Arenadd faltered.

  ‘Tell me.’ Her voice was a mother’s voice, and a commander’s.

  She made me love her, Arenadd said at last, and now it was his voice, his real voice, breaking free. She made me love her in the void, the way I loved Skade.

  Saeddryn’s stomach twisted. ‘She what?’

  Arenadd laughed softly. I’ve slept with worse. She wanted me to do it. She said it was for me, but it was for her. Do you want to know the truth, Saeddryn?

  ‘What truth?’

  She’s like us. She’s got no heart. That’s why she needs us. Needed me. She needs to be loved the way we do, to take away the feeling inside. Gods don’t love. They can’t. But she tried.

  Saeddryn wanted to cry. ‘So she made ye do that.’

  Yes, said Arenadd. When I saw it, I knew I had to love her. Because I was all she had.

  ‘And me?’ asked Saeddryn.

  And you. One human needs another. I need you, Saeddryn.

  She realised that she really was crying now, silently. ‘Ye told me ye didn’t love me. Ye turned me away, made me marry Torc instead. Ye had Skade instead.’

  I met her before you, and I didn’t want to betray her. After she died, I knew you were the only one who could be my queen, but how could I steal you from Torc? He loved you, and he was my friend. He was a better husband than I would have been.

  ‘So ye made Caedmon yer heir,’ said Saeddryn. ‘Treated him like he was yer own son.’

  Yes. My whole life I wanted a son of my own. Caedmon was the closest I would ever come. I tried so hard for him, and you, but … I was weak.

  ‘No, ye weren’t.’ Saeddryn stood up. ‘It’s too late for us now, an’ we’ll just have to live with that. But it’s not too late for Caedmon.’

  No. Caedmon is our heir. Your son, my apprentice. The only heir to my throne. Go to him, Saeddryn, and we can make amends at last.

  Saeddryn wiped away her tears. ‘Together, Arenadd.’

  Together, sweet Saeddryn.

  While Saeddryn was gone, Caedmon pulled himself together and set everyone to building a temporary camp. The frozen waterfall and the clearing around it weren’t the best spot to stay at, but he knew that for now at least they would have to. Most of his followers were wounded, and all were exhausted. A night’s rest would help, even if they would have to go without food.

  Before long some fires had been lit, and several crude shelters built out of branches. Every human there was a griffiner and would share their shelter wit
h their partner, which should keep them warm despite the lack of bedding.

  Once the camp was finished and several of the fitter people had wandered off to forage for food, Caedmon went a short distance away to be alone. Even Shar stayed behind, nursing a slash left across her chest by an Unpartnered’s beak.

  But Caedmon was not left alone to think for long. As he stood by a tree and stared out at the snowy landscape, he sensed someone coming up behind him. He didn’t turn around, but his heart beat faster when Myfina slipped an arm around his waist.

  For a moment the two of them stayed like that, close but not quite embracing, and Caedmon felt Myfina’s warmth soak comfortingly into his aching back.

  ‘We could go back and find Heath,’ he said eventually, once the closeness started making him uneasy.

  ‘Don’t be silly,’ said Myfina, but without sharpness. ‘You know that would be suicide.’

  Caedmon did know. ‘He’ll be all right,’ he said, hoping to convince himself as much as her. ‘He’s a survivor. They don’t know who he is, anyway, and they wouldn’t kill a sick man in his bed.’

  ‘Wouldn’t they?’ Myfina said bitterly. ‘You know what griffins are like.’

  ‘The infirmary is too small for them to get in,’ said Caedmon. ‘I’m sure we’ll see him again some day.’

  ‘Some day.’ Myfina let go, and moved around to stand in front of him. ‘Lord Caedmon,’ she said formally, ‘it’s time we made plans. Where do we go from here? We should decide quickly, because we can’t stay here forever, and the others need to have a plan to follow or they’ll lose heart.’

  ‘Yes,’ Caedmon found himself saying. ‘You’re right. What do you suggest?’

  ‘Lady Saeddryn,’ Myfina said at once. ‘She’s our greatest asset now. We don’t have a stronghold or many followers, but she can’t be killed, and she can go anywhere she likes.’

  ‘Yes,’ Caedmon muttered. ‘We lost today, but that was my mistake. We weren’t ready to try and defend a stronghold like that. With the Unpartnered out of the way we might have won, but we can’t do that now.’