The Shadow's Heart

by K J Taylor

  Skandar snarled at him. ‘You think you special, but not special. Every chick of Mighty Skandar thinks to challenge, and all lose. You lose too, one day.’

  ‘We will see,’ said Kraego.

  Feeling that he had pushed his luck enough for one day, he backed away through the other entrance and into Laela’s bedchamber. Once he was out of sight he ran off into the Eyrie, hoping that Skandar wouldn’t think he was worth chasing.

  Back in his nest chamber, Skandar rasped to himself and took a long drink from his trough. The water tasted slightly odd, but not unpleasant, so he swallowed it anyway.

  The black-feathered youngster was as clever as his mother, and had invaded Skandar’s territory just as she had done. His invasion, of course, wasn’t welcome at all. Plenty of other griffins had said such boastful things to him before, but none of them had been youngsters. Kraego was far too bold for his own good.

  Skandar wondered if he should have just killed him on the spot. He had come close, but his instincts had made him hesitate over killing his own chick. Kraego was a fine example of his father’s virility and his ability to father big, strong young.

  Let him come back when he thought he was old enough, then. Skandar would be ready. The little fool had no idea of how many younger challengers his father had seen off over the years.

  ‘Am dark griffin,’ Skandar muttered to himself now. ‘Never lose.’ He took another beakful of the odd-tasting water.

  Sudden nausea twinged in his stomach. He coughed and shuddered slightly at the sensation, and drank more water to soothe the sensation. The feeling of sickness, however, only grew.

  Groaning softly, he curled up in his nest. He must have swallowed another big piece of bone. The feeling shouldn’t stay too long, and if it did he would make Laela fix it for him.

  Tiredness and weakness followed the twisting in his stomach. Skandar groaned again, and laid his head on his talons. He needed to sleep …

  Blackness closed over his eyes.

  THIRTY-FOUR

  IRON AND RUST

  Kullervo returned to Malvern more than a week after his sudden departure, but he landed on top of the Council Tower rather than returning to his rooms, and waited there until Laela came.

  When she arrived, she took one look at him and ran to his side. ‘Kullervo! Mighty gods, what happened …?’

  Kullervo was still in griffin form. His fur and feathers were bedraggled, his eyes glazed with exhaustion. A long gash down his flank made him drag one foreleg. There was no sign of anybody else with him.

  ‘It’s Warwick,’ he said. ‘Warwick’s fallen.’

  ‘What?’ said Laela.

  Kullervo was swaying slightly where he stood. ‘Resling and Della are dead, and so are their partners,’ he said. ‘The whole city … turned on us. Is Senneck here?’

  ‘She’s fine,’ said Laela. ‘What do yeh mean Warwick’s turned on us? What’s goin’ on?’

  ‘It’s Caedmon,’ said Kullervo, shuddering. ‘He’s alive. He’s taken over Warwick. He and Shar. They — ’

  ‘Wait, wait,’ said Laela. ‘Start at the beginnin’. What happened?’

  Kullervo sat on his haunches and shook his head slowly. ‘I was with Resling and Della. We went for a walk in the city. There was a riot. People saw us and they were angry. They threw things and shouted. Then when we started trying to get back to the Governor’s Tower, they attacked. Dozens of them. Even some of the city guard joined in. Della was killed. We got back to the tower, but then … then Caedmon came.’

  ‘Just him?’ said Laela.

  ‘He and Shar. They were on the walls, and Shar made a challenge to the tower. The griffins there went to fight her one at a time, and she defeated them all. But some of the griffiners in the tower were already on Caedmon’s side. They turned on us. Murdered the Governor, and Resling as well, and let Caedmon and Shar in. Your soldiers stood down. The people in the city started attacking them, and … I don’t know, it was chaos. People dying everywhere. Laela, they hate us.’ Kullervo looked dully at Laela. ‘They know what we did to Saeddryn, and they hate us for it.’

  Rage and horror distorted Laela’s face. ‘They what? She was a monster!’

  ‘She was the Night God’s chosen,’ said Kullervo. ‘The holiest woman in the North. And before that she was a war hero. Only our father was more respected. And we murdered her. We tortured her. We threw her body in her son’s face. And before that … we killed everyone who set them free. Nerth, Iorwerth … and Arenadd. Him first.’

  ‘I did not kill him!’ said Laela. ‘An’ Saeddryn killed Iorwerth. Senneck killed Nerth. I never …’

  ‘Doesn’t matter,’ said Kullervo. ‘I realised all that while I wasn’t talking to anyone. Saw what we’ve done. They already didn’t like us. Now we’ve killed Saeddryn, and we’re consorting with Southerners. We’ve lost, Laela. Lost the North.’

  ‘No we ain’t,’ Laela snapped. ‘We’re gonna take the Unpartnered out there an’ get Warwick back. Once Caedmon’s dead we’ll be fine. We’re gonna be all right, Kullervo.’

  Kullervo looked her in the eye. ‘No, we’re not,’ he said. ‘We’re all going to die. And we deserve to.’

  He turned and limped away.

  When Kullervo entered his quarters he found Senneck there, relaxing in front of the cold fireplace. His heart lightened at the sight of her. Wordlessly, he limped over to her and lay down by her flank.

  Senneck relaxed against him. ‘I am glad to see you again, Kullervo.’

  Kullervo laid his head down. ‘I missed you so much.’

  ‘And I missed you. Why did you leave here alone? You are wounded. What happened?’

  Kullervo told her.

  Senneck hissed softly. ‘Then I was wrong. He did escape.’

  ‘You found him, then?’ said Kullervo.

  ‘Yes. He was where Kraeaina kran ae said he would be, with his mate and a band of other rebels. His mate was carrying his pup, but I killed her.’

  Kullervo’s head came up sharply. ‘She was pregnant? You killed a pregnant woman?’

  ‘I did not mean to; she threw herself in the way when I tried to kill Caedmon. But I would have killed her anyway. She was a rebel and if her pup had survived she would have used it against us.’ Senneck shook her head. ‘Caedmon escaped. The Unpartnered killed every human on that island, and I thought that he must have been among them, but he was not. Now he has returned to make war again, and that is good. Out of hiding, we can kill him.’

  ‘I don’t know if we can, Senneck,’ said Kullervo. ‘The people are on his side. If he comes here, they’ll rise up just as they did in Warwick.’

  ‘It does not matter,’ said Senneck. ‘His death will make them lose courage.’

  ‘But I don’t know if we can kill him,’ said Kullervo. ‘We’ve failed every other time. Maybe … maybe the Night God is protecting him, somehow …’

  ‘Foolery!’ Senneck snapped her beak. ‘There are no gods. And if there were, your Night God did not protect the one who was meant to be her most powerful servant.’

  ‘No.’ Kullervo looked away.

  Senneck softened, and nibbled gently at his neck feathers. ‘I am glad to be with you again. Do not be afraid. I will protect you from Caedmon.’

  ‘And I’ll protect you,’ said Kullervo. ‘I’m not leaving Malvern again. I’m tired of travelling. I want to feel like this is my home.’

  ‘It is. But Kullervo …’

  ‘Yes?’

  ‘It is time you made yourself human again,’ said Senneck. ‘You have been a griffin for too long.’

  ‘No,’ Kullervo rasped. ‘I don’t want to be human.’

  ‘But you are human,’ said Senneck. ‘You wear a griffin’s shape, but your nature is not griffin. If you do not change again, you may forget how to.’

  ‘I won’t,’ said Kullervo. ‘I’ll change back when I’m ready. Just … not now.’

  Senneck nudged him with her beak. ‘You are sad. I smell fear and misery on you.
Are you afraid to be human?’

  ‘Yes.’ Kullervo shuddered. ‘I’m afraid of everything. I’m afraid of what’s going to happen.’

  ‘And what is going to happen?’ asked Senneck.

  ‘I don’t know, but … I feel …’ Kullervo’s talons curled. ‘I feel … judged. I feel as if we’re going to be punished for what we’ve done. I feel cursed.’

  ‘You are only afraid of Caedmon,’ said Senneck. ‘Do not be! You have defeated your greatest enemy. You and your sister destroyed what was said to be undestroyable. What do you have to fear from a mere mortal?’

  ‘Nothing, but …’ Kullervo struggled to find words, and finally gave up.

  ‘Then that is enough,’ said Senneck. ‘Stop this now. We have done our duty a hundred times. Now we may rest and eat, and enjoy our rewards. Your Southern friends are doing well, and will be glad to see you again. Visit them, and they will make you happy.’

  ‘What about Kraego?’

  ‘He is well. Growing larger, and roaming the Eyrie as if he owns it.’

  That made Kullervo feel better. ‘He’s a good griffin. Sometimes I feel like he’s my son.’

  ‘You helped to raise him,’ Senneck admitted. ‘And I know that he likes you. But I do not think he will stay here forever. He will grow too large, and will be a threat to the Mighty Skandar. If he has sense, he will choose a human and leave. In another Eyrie, outside Skandar’s territory, he could become a master of his own territory. And he would be safe there.’

  An ordinary human might have found this incomprehensible, but Kullervo’s griffish instinct was strong enough for it to make complete sense to him. ‘Or he might decide to stay here and challenge Skandar. He’s confident enough.’

  ‘Foolish enough,’ Senneck snorted. ‘But that is his choice. I have done all I can for him, and so have you.’

  ‘You think Skandar’s too strong for him?’

  ‘Until Kraego reaches maturity, he will be too strong,’ said Senneck. ‘And even then it would be a dangerous battle. But let Kraego choose his own way. Now we must rest, and think of what we will do when the rebel Shar brings her human here.’

  ‘I won’t fight,’ said Kullervo.

  ‘You must,’ said Senneck. ‘If the enemy comes to our nest, you must fight to defend your territory. Every adult male must, and you are a griffiner. A true griffiner fights beside his griffin.’

  But Kullervo looked away. ‘I won’t fight ever again,’ he said. ‘Not even to save my own life.’

  ‘Or mine?’ Senneck asked sharply. ‘Or your sister’s? Would you stand aside and do nothing if the enemy came after her? Is that what you would do?’

  Kullervo jerked away as if she had hit him. ‘No! I … I don’t know, but I can’t … I don’t want to hurt anyone.’

  ‘In warfare, you must. Only cripples and chicks hide from fighting.’

  ‘I know. I …’ Kullervo stood up abruptly and limped out of the room, almost as if he were trying to escape from something that confused and frightened him, but would not leave him alone.

  Up at the top of the tower, Arenadd drifted through the familiar chambers that had once been his home, and into Skandar’s nest. He knew that his old partner was there; the griffin’s presence and dark power made him feel stronger and more vital. More connected with the world, somehow, as if he could nearly touch it.

  Skandar lay curled up in his nest, breathing slowly.

  As he had many times before, Arenadd reached out to him in the only way he could. Skandar. Skandar, it’s me.

  The dark griffin’s eyes opened, and he looked up blearily at the dark spectre. ‘You come back,’ he croaked.

  Yes. Skandar, listen. I’ve been to Warwick. Caedmon’s coming. He’s coming here. There are griffiners with him, and others are coming too. He’s sent messengers to Skenfrith and Fruitsheart, and they’re coming. Griffiners are rushing to join him, and they’re coming here. Dozens of them. You have to warn Laela!

  Slowly, Skandar raised his head. ‘Enemy … not come,’ he rasped. ‘I go … go catch them. Take Unpartner. Kill …’ His head fell back.

  Arenadd drifted closer. Skandar, are you all right?

  ‘Am strong,’ said Skandar. But his voice sounded weak, horribly weak. He tried to raise his head again, and once again it fell back.

  What was left of Arenadd’s emotions turned to fear. You’re sick.

  ‘Not sick!’ Skandar gathered his huge paws beneath him and heaved himself upright. He took several steps forward, but they were shaky steps. His great body swayed precariously from side to side. ‘Not sick!’ he insisted. ‘I go, go now, fly with … with Unpartner. Go kill …’

  No, Skandar, said Arenadd. You need to rest. Please, just lie down again …

  Skandar ignored him. Moving slowly and unsteadily, he made his way into the audience chamber.

  Laela was there, dismissing a tough, scarred Northerner. ‘Go get them organised,’ she told him as he left. ‘An’ be ready for my orders.’

  The man nodded curtly and exited just as Skandar made his shambling arrival.

  Laela turned to greet him. ‘There yeh are. I was just about to come and see … Great talons, what’s wrong with yeh?’

  Skandar sat back on his haunches and regarded her regally. ‘Am not wrong,’ he said.

  ‘Good,’ said Laela. ‘Listen, Caedmon’s taken Warwick. I need yeh t’go out there with the Unpartnered.’

  ‘No,’ said Skandar. He blinked slowly. ‘Arenadd say Shar’s human come here. Come with other griffin, and griffin from Skenfrith and Fruit-heart and other nest. Come to fight here. So I go kill them in forest, away from nest.’

  Laela stared. ‘Arenadd says?’

  ‘Arenadd go see,’ Skandar said serenely. ‘See Warwick, see Shar. Come here, tell me. Tell me everything.’

  ‘Skandar, Arenadd’s dead,’ said Laela. ‘He’s not here.’

  ‘Is here!’ said Skandar. ‘Come here many times, help Mighty Skandar. Warn where Kraeaina kran ae is. Show him where you are. Talk to human with wings. Only he and Mighty Skandar hear him.’

  ‘But — ’ Laela began. She stopped, and frowned. ‘Kullervo …? Is that what he …’ She looked around quickly. ‘Is Arenadd here now?’

  ‘Is here,’ said Skandar. ‘Is there.’ He poked his beak toward a spot of empty air beside Laela. ‘He say, not bother tell you, you not see him. Mortal not see. Only ones with dark power see. Me, winged human, Kraeaina kran ae.’

  Laela’s frown deepened. ‘My guards told me Saeddryn kept talking to him when we had her locked up.’

  ‘Yes, Arenadd there,’ Skandar said impatiently. ‘Now here. Say where enemy is. Say must kill before they come here, not break Malvern.’

  Laela pulled herself together. ‘Right, then,’ she said. ‘I’ve got my human army here, an’ they’ll stay here to defend the city. Meanwhile, you an’ the Unpartnered can fly out an’ attack the bastards along the way. That oughta take care of it.’

  ‘I go,’ Skandar agreed. ‘Go now.’ He stood up, and immediately toppled over onto his side.

  Laela ran to him with a shout of dismay, but the moment she tried to touch him he lashed out at her with his beak and nearly tore her ear off.

  She backed off hastily, and watched the dark griffin try to get up. He managed it, but his legs splayed out awkwardly, and when he tried to walk he stumbled and nearly collapsed again.

  Laela’s heart shrank into a tiny, withered ball. ‘Skandar, yeh can’t fight,’ she said. ‘Not like this.’

  Immediately Skandar let out a maddened scream and leapt at her with his beak open wide. The movement was so sudden and violent that if his back legs hadn’t given way mid-spring he could well have killed her. ‘Can fight!’ he bellowed from the floor. ‘Am not weak!’

  Laela thought very quickly. ‘All right, then,’ she said as soothingly as she could. ‘I know yeh can fight. But the Unpartnered are tired and weak after so much fightin’. They might not be much good. So why don’t we let them stay
here for a bit? They can attack our enemies when they’re closer. That way they won’t have t’go lookin’ for them an’ they won’t be tired from flying.’

  The tactic worked. Skandar relaxed. ‘Wait, then,’ he said. ‘Mighty Skandar need water.’ He stumbled back to his nest.

  Laela too relaxed, though not much. Maybe her baby had picked up on its mother’s nervousness, because it kicked restlessly. Laela patted her belly. ‘There, there,’ she said. ‘Don’t yeh worry; Mama’s gonna sort this out. Somehow.’

  She hurried off, slowed down by her aching back, to the Council Chamber for an emergency meeting. The walk gave her plenty of time to think. Or rather, to fume and worry. Pregnancy was not helping her mood at all. Neither was Caedmon.

  Damn him! No matter how many times she thought she had done away with him, he always managed to come back. Forget his mother; he was the real pain in her side, and had been for far too long.

  Not for the first time, Laela wished she hadn’t judged her father for his heavy drinking. Nowadays, even getting drunk wouldn’t have given her much relief. Jumping off the tower or maybe just running away to live in an Amorani monastery would have been preferable. Ruling the North was far harder than she had ever imagined. But she refused to consider doing what some Eyrie Mistresses did and relegating the harder duties to others. It was her Eyrie, and the decisions were hers to make, stress be damned.

  The hardest part, though, wasn’t all the work she had to do, or the fact that she had almost no time to herself any more. The hardest part was simply knowing, every moment of every day, that thousands of people depended on her. Everything she did affected them. Every mistake could cost lives. Punishment made enemies, and mercy made the enemies she already had bolder. Nothing was simple any more. And now she had to worry about becoming a mother as well. How in the world was she going to raise a child on top of everything she already had to do?

  Akhane wasn’t much help either. She loved him dearly, but her husband had very little interest in politics. He preferred to spend his time reading and writing, or talking to people and asking them questions about his interests. Laela hadn’t tried to encourage him to be more of a help. It made her feel better to know that he at least had time to be his own person, and his calm presence always managed to cheer her up.