The Demon Inside Me

by Christopher Nelson

  "The Consortium and the Syndicate have been trying to rescue everyone we can," he said. "Purgatory doesn't like living creatures. The souls have been more than happy to guide us to the survivors."

  "Did Hikari and Becky make it?" I asked.

  "Yeah. We got them out onto another layer just as the Gates blew, otherwise they'd be floating around here with the rest." Kibs gestured at the souls still dancing around us. "Caleb got out too, some of the Syndicate caught up to him. Most of the Lucifer fools survived the blast, but it scattered them all over the place. We've been phasing them out as we find them. It's been a bitch. This place is creeping me the hell out."

  "I don't know. It's sort of pretty," I said.

  Tink mumbled something against my shoulder. Kibs leaned in to peer closer at her. "You sure she's ok, Zay?"

  "She's ok," I said. Her scowl was gone, her expression peaceful as she slept. Sort of cute. "Yeah. She's going to be ok from here on out. It's all over. Let's go home."

  Chapter Twenty Two

  For the past week and a half, I hadn't had anyone trying to hurt, maim, or kill me. None of my friends had been murdered. I hadn't come home to find any strangers crashing on my couch. I hadn't even had a mild threat of bodily harm.

  In a way, I missed it.

  In other ways, I didn't. Hikari and I had found a small apartment, not far from where my previous apartment was. We barely scraped together the security deposit and first month's rent, plus a down payment on a cheap used car. Furnishing the place involved some creative accounting, credit, and Craigslist. Luckily, my job with Silvatini Construction was still available, and there were a few contracts coming up over the summer that would give us enough income to live on.

  For her part, she had a part time job lined up, as well as a small stipend from the Northeastern Regional Conclave for living expenses. While we struggled now, in a couple of months we'd be just fine. Insurance was arguing that the collapse of the building was an Act of God, but at least a partial payout was in the works. That might be months away. We weren't holding our breaths.

  The apartment would have been a fixer-upper if it was a house, but the landlord flat out told us that we couldn't do any work on it. Part of the charm of the complex was its age, he said. I didn't find things falling to dust all around me to be especially charming, but I took his word for it. Hikari defied him and did a little handiwork here, a little there. It might never be as nice as my previous apartment, but we'd leave it in better shape than when we came.

  On the way home from work one night, I swung out toward the north and took a detour. First Revelation Church looked just like it did the last time I had been there, old and proud. I turned into the parking lot and saluted the scorch mark in the parking lot that represented the grave of my last car. Jase hadn't ever had it cleaned off. As I started to loop around to leave, another car entered the lot and pulled into the nearest parking space. I put the car in park and waited.

  Jase stepped out of the car and waved at me. I lowered the window and waved back. "Been a while," I called to him as he walked over.

  "It has," Jase said. He looked a little older, a little grayer. Maybe stress from having to flee the city? "Good to see you again, Zay. Would you like to stop in, have something to drink, catch up a little?"

  "I'm already running late," I said. "Hikari will be worried if I don't get home soon."

  "She will?"

  "We're living together. Living in sin, so to speak."

  His eyes twinkled. "I knew that already. I forgive you."

  "Thanks, and how?"

  A small figure phased into place behind Jase's right shoulder, wings flapping slowly. "Because we've been chatting on and off," Kibs said. "The good pastor is trying to civilize me, so to speak. Good fucking luck with that."

  "Language," Jase said.

  "Sorry."

  "How about it, Zay? I'd like to hear about what happened at the Gates from your perspective," he said. "Kibs has told me what happened in the most general sense, but no one knows exactly what happened, except for yourself, Caleb, and Anna."

  "And Caleb won't tell you?"

  "Caleb says it is your story to tell. Anna refuses to talk about it."

  I paused. I hadn't heard much from Kibs or anyone else after the incident, so I was missing a lot of information myself. I wanted to know what had happened from the other side just as much as they did. "Yeah, let me park and call Hikari and tell her I'll be late."

  A few minutes later, I was sitting across the kitchen table from Jase, a cup of soda on the table in front of me. Kibs was sitting on the table itself, slurping away at his own cup. Hikari had wanted to come and see them herself, but we only had one car between us, and I had been less than willing to drive all the way home and all the way back here. She extracted a promise that I'd take her to visit Jase at another time before letting the matter drop.

  "Are you all right?" Jase asked. "You seem distracted."

  "Sorry, just thinking. Where's Caleb, by the way?"

  "He's been busy lately. I imagine the Choir has been asking him some pointed questions about his involvement in recent events."

  Kibs burped, then spoke up himself. "My Syndicate contacts say he's been getting called in to speak with at least one of the Seraphim, maybe more than one. He's a popular sort of guy these days. Not like you."

  "I greatly prefer being unpopular." Opheran had told me that the Prince of the House wanted to meet me. I had politely refused. That hadn't gone over too well, but they reluctantly agreed that letting my involvement in the incident blow over was for the best. Flaunting the fact that a halfblood had foiled the plans of a high ranked demon was something that would make any House uncomfortable. Even so, Opheran had told me that some sort of reward was in the works.

  For the next thirty minutes, I told Jase everything that had happened, starting from when my apartment building came down, and ending when Kibs rescued Tink and I. "The souls," I told him. "They were dancing for us, leading the imps to us. I had always thought that the souls captured there were dead, to put it bluntly. I didn't think they'd be able to act on their own like that."

  "From my viewpoint, it doesn't surprise me at all," Jase said. "The soul lives on after the body returns to dust. Even more so, they would assume a new form upon arriving in Heaven or Hell."

  "No way for them to get there," I said.

  "Even so, it's a step in the right direction for them."

  "If you say so. What's the story there, Kibs? What's the relationship?"

  The imp looked up from his cup. "We've always been couriers of some sort, haven't we? Back before the War, we were the ones who delivered souls to Heaven or Hell after they had been processed in Purgatory."

  "So you were involved with the Project?"

  Kibs shrugged. "Do you really think I could tell you?"

  "Would the Chairman tell me?"

  "Not a chance. Do you really want to be threatened with death for knowing something you shouldn't again?"

  I grinned. "Fair point."

  Jase walked to the fridge to refill his cup. "The other thing I wonder about is the nature of the Gates themselves. Even with all of the supernatural events and beings I've found myself involved with lately, the Gates seem to be a step beyond."

  "I assume they were put in place by either God or Lucifer, when the War looked as if it would be ending shortly. Maybe it was something to keep their successors from making the same mistakes. That's why the simple way to open the Gates was a cooperative venture. They must have assumed that if we got to the point of being able to work together, we would be responsible enough to use the power for something other than destruction."

  Kibs snorted. "You fucked up that idea something fierce, didn't you?"

  Jase glared at the imp as he sat back down. "I agree with the sentiment, if not the language. A very limited sort of cooperation, isn't it? And now the Gates are open, Purgatory truly exists once again."

  "Better than letting it explode," I said.


  "True," Jase said. "But it concerns me. There is something deeper, isn't there?"

  We both looked at Kibs. The imp ignored us and groomed himself. "Kibs, there are Gates to Heaven and Hell somewhere in Purgatory, right?" I asked.

  "Yeah."

  "And they're protected, aren't they?"

  "In a manner of speaking."

  "You're not going to tell us any details, are you?"

  His wings snapped out, then folded. "Hopefully, we won't ever need to."

  I let that topic drop. "So did you and the Syndicate get everyone out?"

  "Are you kidding?" His eyes flickered and sparked. "A lot of the younger and weaker demons there were killed in the blast. House Lucifer lost a big chunk of their cannon fodder and their up and coming youth. Amon took losses as well, but Lucifer's been hurt. It'll take a while for the effects to be felt, but it'll take them years to recover. On top of confirmed losses, there are bunches we never tracked down. Search and rescue efforts are still going, we're pulling a few out every day still, but that number's dropping every day."

  I smiled. "Couldn't have happened to a nicer bunch."

  "Don't be such an idiot, Zay," Kibs snapped. "While you might have had issues with them, think of it in broader terms. The two strongest Houses are on their asses. Belphagor or Leviathan might actually be able to make a claim that they're on top now. The Host is unstable, Zay. You know what that means."

  "The Choir might make a move."

  "Damn right. Sorry, Jase, but this is pretty big."

  "Do you think that's why Caleb is being called away so often?" Jase asked.

  "Probably," Kibs said. "Lucky for us, the Choir's slow to move. I hope they'll argue about it long enough to let us recover. If we can present a united face to them, they won't take the risk. There've been a lot of meetings between Princes lately."

  "That's probably why Opheran wanted me to accompany him," I said. "He wanted a mascot for the House."

  "Or just leverage against Lucifer. They're not happy about what happened."

  "Not exactly my fault. They'd have lost more if Azriphel had gotten his way."

  "Says you and me, at least. They'll probably have to swallow their pride and let it go," Kibs said. "But I'm telling you Zay, don't you dare go anywhere alone with a Lucifer for the next century or so. Accidents happen, you know."

  "I've had enough accidents like that for a lifetime," I said. "Just out of curiosity, did anyone ever find Azzy?"

  Kibs flexed his wings. "He's officially listed as missing. No body, no evidence. Some of the demons we pulled out of there recently said they encountered him. A lot the worse for wear, but alive. Who knows whether they were hallucinating or not?"

  I kept my suspicions to myself. No body. No confirmation. All hearsay. "Don't tell Tink that."

  Kibs and Jase exchanged looks. "She thinks he's dead?" Jase asked.

  "I guess."

  "You're avoiding her."

  "I guess."

  "Why?"

  I shrugged. "No particular reason. Have you spoken to Becky lately?"

  "No. Has she recovered yet?"

  I shook my head. "Still in the hospital. She hasn't wanted to see me, otherwise I'd have healed her by now." She had covered Hikari's body with her own, soaking the concussion from the explosion of the Gates. Her injuries hadn't been life threatening, but enough to keep her immobile for a while. "Hikari said she's supposed to be released in another week."

  Jase smiled. "Good to hear."

  "She was a pain to get phased out in time," Kibs complained. "Fought it, wanted to make sure Hikari wasn't hurt. Stayed put until she was sure. Damn close. Too damn close. Another second or two and she'd have been a permanent resident of Purgatory."

  "She's stubborn," I agreed. "We'll have to have a drink for her. Going to drop by one of these days?"

  "You bet. Can you afford booze yet? You still owe me."

  "First paycheck on the new project tomorrow. It'll be a celebration. Jase, you're welcome to drop by too, but it's not likely to be your sort of thing."

  The pastor smiled. "I agree. Would you like me to mention it to Caleb if he's around?"

  "Yeah, I'd appreciate that."

  "What about the conclave?" he asked.

  "What about them?"

  "Hikari is an adept, isn't she?" I nodded. "So, isn't Anna in the conclave as well?"

  I nodded. "She is. Hikari said she just passed another test, she's almost on the verge of breaking into the adept ranks."

  "Doesn't she ask about you?"

  "I imagine so. I asked Hikari not to give any details." I had asked Hikari not to tell her anything. She knew my reasons and while she didn't completely agree with them, she understood why.

  "Why are you avoiding her?" Jase asked quietly. "She's called me repeatedly, always asks if I've been in touch with you. When she calls the next time, I will tell her the truth, you know."

  "That's fine."

  "You're not answering the question, Zay."

  Even Kibs looked concerned. I looked down at my hands. "It's all over. Her vendetta is over, she's out of danger, and now she can get back to her regular life. It's what she deserves."

  "But is that what she wants?"

  "She's spoiled enough as is."

  "You're avoiding the question again."

  I sighed. "I don't care what she wants. She needs this."

  "Arrogant prick," Kibs mumbled.

  "I agree," Jase said. That stung. "Talk with her, Zay. She doesn't know what happened. All she knows is that you left her and have been actively avoiding her."

  I couldn't argue the point. I had seen her to a hospital for treatment of her injuries, left her in Caleb's care, and vanished. I changed my phone number, my address, and my life. If I could have convinced Hikari to move away, I would have, but her responsibilities to the Regional Conclave were going to keep her in the area for a while.

  They were still watching me. I drummed my fingers on the table, then stood up. "I think I should get going," I said. "Hikari's going to get worried."

  Lame excuse, but they accepted it all the same. Jase walked me to the front of the church, Kibs winging along beside him. Outside, the evening was still warm, early summer in full swing. Crickets and frogs sang under the darkening sky. Before I started down the steps, Jase put his hand on my shoulder. "Talk to her," he said.

  "I'll think about it," I said.

  I thought about it the entire way home. By the time I pulled into the lot, I hadn't made much headway. I did feel guilty for abandoning her, but I didn't want her to get into more trouble. She'd spent her entire adult life pursuing a demon for vengeance, getting herself deeper and deeper into trouble, and then she had found me and dragged me down with her. Was it so selfish of me to avoid being dragged in again? Even if her fight with Azriphel was over, I was sure she'd get involved with something else. If she had me bound again, she might use that as an excuse to start something.

  I stepped out of the car. The sun had finally set, a scattering of stars visible overhead, the only source of illumination for the parking lot. Some people thought a dark parking lot was dangerous. After what I had been through in the last year, it didn't concern me at all.

  Even so, when I heard someone's footsteps approaching you in the dark, I paid attention. I stopped. The footsteps continued, growing closer. I turned in that direction, squinted, waited. A shadowy figure came into view, just the outline of a person. Short. The way the figure stood told me they were female. "Who's there?" I asked, knowing the answer.

  "Me," she said.

  "Stalking me?"

  "You're not easy to find." Tink's voice was harsh, just loud enough to reach my ears. Cars drove past, but they sounded oddly distant. Magic? Maybe. "It took a lot of effort to find you, you know. I was lucky. Called Jase right after you left."

  "He doesn't know where I live," I said.

  "But Kibs does, and Kibs was with him."

  "Damn them."

  She took a step toward
me. A streetlight flickered, came to life. Her expression was set in its usual scowl, her right arm held in a sling. "Why?"

  "I don't want to drag you into any more trouble," I said.

  "Bullshit. I dragged you into trouble. You just want to get away from that, don't you?"

  "I'd be lying if I said I didn't."

  "I tried to force you to appear."

  "It didn't work."

  "It didn't."

  I nodded. "Because it's over, Tink. Our contract was for a year and a day, remember? It ended a week ago."

  "It's over, is it?"

  "The contract's over. The Gates are open. Azriphel is missing, presumed dead. What's left?"

  "That's for me to define and for you to find out." She took a step toward me. "Don't presume to dictate terms to me, demon."

  "I'm not dictating a damn thing, Tink. I'm telling you the way it is."

  "You selfish, cowardly-"

  "Shut up," I snapped at her. "Just shut up. Yes, it's selfish. I'm tired of being jerked around by you. I'm also tired of saving your ass every time you decide to throw rocks at a hornet's nest. I'm not going to stick around in your life, for your own good."

  "Who are you to decide what's good for me?"

  "Someone older and wiser than you."

  "Wiser?" She snorted. "You left me in Caleb's care. Dropped me off at a hospital, didn't leave a message, a note, not even a goodbye."

  "I'm sorry about that. I should have explained."

  "And now you're trying to tell me that avoiding me is for my own good?"

  "You've been fighting your entire life!" I stepped toward her, unable to hold back any more. "Lucifer's tits, girl, you've been spending your entire life ever since your parents died trying to hunt down demons just to get to Azriphel, haven't you? You're done with that! Done! He's gone."

  "So?"

  "So you're done. You've earned yourself a normal life. Live it! I don't want to give you an excuse to get into more trouble. You have a second chance to live. Take it."

  "You think that not being around is going to discourage me from dealing with the supernatural when I'm already a mage?"