Come Home, Cowboy

by Cathy McDavid

  “Here.” He handed her a towel from the bathroom, insisting she needed one after taking her poncho and draping it on the landing railing.

  “Thanks.” She wiped absently at the long, dark hair lying in thick, sodden hanks against her neck and back. Between her flattened hair and sculpted cheekbones, her dark brown eyes appeared enormous.

  “Are you cold?”

  “I’m fine.” She wiped her face and neck. Rain had soaked the collar of her blouse, and it clung to her skin. “Too excited to be cold. Where do I...?” She held up the towel, which he took from her.

  “I have a very sophisticated laundry collection system.” He tossed the towel into a half-full wicker laundry basket sitting beside the coffee table.

  Cara’s laugh caught him off guard. She really was excited.

  They stood in the center of the living room facing each other. When she’d first arrived at his doorstep, he’d been watching TV and had promptly turned it off. Letting go of her after their hug—the third one today—hadn’t been easy. She’d felt incredible in his arms, soft and yielding where it counted, firm yet pliant where it mattered most.

  She was also bursting at the seams and not able to stand in any one place for long. What had put her in this state?

  Having finished drying herself, she flitted away from him, unable to contain her nervous energy. Damp footprints appeared on the wood laminate floor in her wake. He’d mop later. Now his entire attention was centered on Cara.

  “You’ll never guess what happened!” she said.

  He didn’t even try. “I give up.”

  “Wait.” She spun. “Where are the children?”

  “Asleep.”

  “Already? It’s only seven thirty.”

  “They were pooped. Kimberly nodded off in her high chair. Nathan lasted maybe another fifteen minutes.”

  “I don’t want to wake them.” She glanced down the hall.

  “We won’t. Trust me.”

  “Okay.” She resumed pacing. Josh leaned against the counter to watch her. “Anyway, Dr. Armstrong called me a little bit ago. He’s the head of Teddy’s school. You met him this afternoon.”

  “Yeah.” Josh recalled a gentle-mannered, middle-aged man with Summer.

  “Anyway, he was impressed with you, Wind Walker and Teddy.”

  “Nice.” Josh tried to listen. He was more interested in how to get Cara back in his arms or, at least, to stand in one place long enough for him to drink in the sight of her, slowly and leisurely.

  “He’s interested in partnering with the sanctuary and had a proposition for me.”

  Partnership? Proposition? That was enough to bring Josh back to the topic at hand. “What for? What can the sanctuary offer the school?”

  “An equine therapy program.” Cara’s smile was as blinding as it was beautiful.

  Josh had never seen her like this before, bursting with energy and brimming with happiness. He doubted anyone else had seen her like this, either. Not for the past couple of years.

  It was a potent combination. He didn’t care if this Armstrong guy wanted to partner with the sanctuary for the next deep space mission. He’d go along with it just to bask in her smile again.

  “Come on.” He drew her to the couch and sat her down. “Tell me all about it.”

  She did, the story pouring from her in a rush.

  “He said animal programs have been proven to help individuals with special needs, especially young children. They improve social and communication skills, teach them how to take direction and build confidence. Plus, the physical activity is good exercise. And horseback riding is fun.”

  “Always the best part.”

  “Dr. Armstrong also said animal programs can be successful when other types of therapies have failed. I believe it, too. You heard Summer. That first time Teddy met Wind Walker, she thanked you and said how well Teddy would behave the rest of the day.”

  “I remember.”

  “Horse therapy programs are some of the most sought-after ones, and there are relatively few in the Phoenix metropolitan area. None to speak of this far northeast. And here’s the best part.” She twisted sideways on the couch to face Josh. “Parents will pay lots of money to enroll their kids in a qualified, reputable program.”

  She named an amount, and Josh whistled. “You weren’t kidding.”

  “With income like that, the sanctuary could be completely self-sufficient. Indefinitely. No drain on the ranch whatsoever.”

  She rested her palm on his thigh, which made concentrating difficult. Josh took a deep breath, focused and recalled something she’d said about qualified, reliable programs.

  “Don’t take this wrong, but what do you know about teaching children with special needs?”

  Cara didn’t appear insulted by his question. “Almost none. Which is why I would partner with the learning center. They know very little about horses. We’d combine our different areas of expertise.”

  Josh jumped to a conclusion, but he felt safe doing so. Most businesses required an initial investment. “How much money, if I can ask, are you required to put up to fund the program?”

  “I’ll have to provide the safety equipment, harnesses and helmets. The round pen will suffice for now, but we’d eventually need to construct a small riding arena. I was thinking of using the open area behind the horse stable for that and six or eight outdoor stalls to house the program horses. It’ll take time. I can’t do everything at once.”

  “What about the institute? Are they contributing?”

  “They’ll bring in the clients, of course. That’s a given. They’ll also handle the marketing and secure appropriate licensing and any certifications required. Dr. Armstrong’s looking into it this week and will call me. I won’t order the equipment until the licenses and certifications are in place.”

  Josh was glad to see she was proceeding with caution despite her excitement. He would have hated for her to lose the money she’d earned today. But if people did pay as much as this doctor said, the risk wasn’t too great.

  “If all goes well, I might even be able to draw a salary eventually.” Cara sat back. “Not a lot, of course. The sanctuary operates as a nonprofit organization. But something.”

  “I’m glad for you, Cara.” He tucked a lock of her damp hair behind her ear.

  “Are you?”

  “It’s obvious you want this.”

  “I do. I realized earlier, after Summer gave me the money, that for a long time, the sanctuary was a means to an end for me. I’d needed an outlet for my grief, and it gave me one.”

  Josh was impressed. “You found a way to cope and have done a lot of good at the same time.”

  “But I’ve changed. I’m not sure when. During the adoption event, I guess. Or the last few months. All I know is, I want the sanctuary to be more than a place for abandoned or abused mustangs. With the equine therapy program, I can really make a difference.”

  “You already do.”

  “I can make a bigger one, and not just with horses, either.” Her eyes shone, pulling Josh further and further into their depths. “I can help children like Teddy. Improve the quality of their lives and those of their families. Only a little, but still.”

  “Maybe a lot.”

  “You think?”

  “Honey, I think it’s an idea that’s tailor-made for you.”

  “With the sanctuary being self-supporting, Dos Estrellas will have a better chance of recovering.”

  “That’s not why you should do it.”

  “It isn’t.” Her voice grew stronger. More certain. “I feel like this is what I’ve been waiting for. I’ll get to save and rehabilitate wild mustangs and help children at the same time. I can’t imagine anything more rewarding or satisfying.”

  Her enthusia
sm was contagious. He tucked a finger beneath her chin and tipped her face to his. “Finding your passion. It’s a wonderful thing.”

  “What’s your passion?”

  He considered a moment before answering. “For a long while, I thought it was rodeoing.”

  “And now?”

  “Those two kids sleeping in the other room have become pretty important to me.”

  “I can tell.”

  “They’re why I want, why I need, this ranch to get back on its feet and operate at a profit. So I can provide a secure home for them and a future.”

  She searched his face, her expression softening. “You’re not at all what I expected.”

  “What did you expect?”

  Her smile returned, more captivating than before. Josh couldn’t take his eyes off her mouth, not even if he tried. He wanted to kiss that smile, discover for himself how sweet it tasted. How soft it felt. How easily her lips parted to let him in.

  “You’re not the same person you were when you first arrived here,” she said. “You’re different. You don’t have a chip on your shoulder anymore.”

  “Can you blame me? For having a chip? My dad wanted nothing to do with me and Cole.”

  “It wasn’t like that and not entirely his fault.”

  “If you’re referring to my mother, I agree. But she had good reason to be angry at him.”

  Cara nodded. “I know what it feels like. Manuel cheated on me. Twice, maybe three times.”

  “That must have hurt.”

  “It did. In hindsight, the marriage was over and done with, though I refused to admit it.”

  “Kind of like my parents, when Dad met Raquel. But that didn’t make his cheating on Mom right.”

  “Manuel asked me to forgive him. I did. Unfortunately, as the saying goes, I couldn’t forget. I knew the second woman. Not well. She worked with him. How unoriginal is that?”

  “It probably happens more than we think,” Josh agreed.

  “I met her at a company function. Thought she was nice. I was wrong.”

  “Manuel’s the one who was wrong.”

  “We separated after I found out. I wasn’t being nosy. I didn’t go snooping through his desk or phone or hack into his email and Facebook accounts. I had no idea. It honestly didn’t occur to me. I would never have cheated on him, so why would he cheat on me?”

  “We tend to judge others by ourselves.”

  “I took Javier to Mesa to visit my mother. We no sooner got there than he started running a fever. Within the hour, he was vomiting, and I decided we should go home. Manuel didn’t answer his cell phone. I figured he was working and shut it off. He did that sometimes. Imagine my surprise when I discovered him in bed—our bed—with his coworker. I turned around and walked out with Javier. We came here. August and Raquel let us stay in the apartment. I don’t know what I would have done without them.”

  “I’m glad they were there for you.”

  “Me, too. It was important for me to give you and your brothers the ten thousand dollars today. If the equine therapy program takes off, I’m planning on making regular monthly payments.”

  “I hope it does take off. And not because of the money,” he added, wishing she’d move closer.

  “This is the first time I’ve felt optimistic about the future since losing Javier. I didn’t think I ever could, or would, again.” She met his gaze. “You’re the one responsible. You and Wind Walker.”

  Him and Wind Walker. Not him, the man she’d fallen for like he had her.

  “A lot of people are responsible,” he said, striving to hide his disappointment. “Summer and Teddy, the student volunteers from the high school—”

  “Hush, Josh.” Cara placed a finger on his lips and let it linger.

  He hesitated. If he talked, she might remove her finger. But then, her lips would be free to...

  “I’d like to kiss you, Cara.”

  She tilted her head at a very appealing angle. “I’d like that, too.” He dipped his head, and she stopped him. “The way I feel when I’m with you, it scares me. I’ve been hurt. Badly hurt. I’m too fragile to suffer another blow.”

  “You may be stronger than you think.”

  “Perhaps.” She raised her eyes to his while tracing the line of his jaw with her fingertip. “Kissing you also makes me believe in things I thought were impossible.”

  “It’s the same for me.”

  “That scares me more than the fear of being hurt. You’re...you’re the kind of guy I could...learn to love.”

  “You’re that kind of woman for me, too.”

  “Good.” Her smile returned and blossomed. “Being in love is much better with two people.”

  Josh had tried. Really, he had. Holding off any longer was simply impossible. Slipping one arm around Cara’s waist and the other beneath her knees, he lifted her up and onto his lap.

  “I’m glad we agree,” he said and lowered his mouth to hers.

  Chapter Eleven

  Cara could have kissed Josh forever. He went slow, waiting until she relaxed before increasing the pressure and his demands. She acquiesced, and it wasn’t hard at all. Actually, it was the easiest thing she’d done in years.

  “You’re beautiful,” he said, his mouth leaving hers long enough to taste her neck, the base of her throat, the rounded curve of her breast at the opening of her shirt. “I thought that from the first moment I saw you.”

  Corny, maybe, but she loved hearing it.

  “When was that?” Her voice sounded light and playful. Strange. She was so used to hearing the raw edge of grief.

  “The first day Cole and I arrived. We got out of the truck. You were in the backyard, standing near the fence, staring at the mountains.”

  “I don’t remember.” The day had been a blur. Everyone had been reeling from August’s death.

  “Your hair was loose.” He threaded his fingers through her long locks. “Like now. And blowing in the wind. You didn’t turn, though I was sure you must have heard my truck.”

  “I was so sad. Missing August and hoping he’d finally found peace.” The last few months had been an ordeal with August in constant, excruciating pain.

  “I figured you were angry at me and Cole for not visiting Dad before he died.”

  “I was angry, but that’s not the reason I didn’t turn around.”

  He stroked her cheek. “Did I ever tell you I find prickly women a turn-on?”

  “I’m not prickly!”

  “You can’t seriously be trying to deny it?”

  She laughed with him, only to sober as memories returned. “I saw you for the first time when Raquel called me in from the yard. I’d already made up my mind not to like either you or Cole.”

  “Which changed the moment we met.”

  “Ha! You were every bit as aloof and cool as I expected. I didn’t like you for a long time.”

  “Lucky for me, you came to your senses.”

  “Your children had a lot to do with it.”

  “So, it’s Nathan and Kimberly you really like. Not me.”

  “I like you, Josh.” She cradled his face in her hands. “You know that.”

  “Liking doesn’t come close to describing what I feel for you.”

  She sighed. “This won’t be easy. Whatever it is we’re doing, wherever it is we’re heading.”

  He searched her face. “Nothing worthwhile is.”

  “I’m worried.”

  “About?”

  She shifted, wanting to, needing to, get off his lap. If she didn’t, she’d lose her courage or he’d distract her.

  He helped rather than hindered her. She liked that about him. That he always allowed her to set the pace and was patient when a lot of men wouldn’
t be.

  “Where do I start?” she said once she’d settled in beside him.

  Her shattered heart, not yet healed and very vulnerable? Manuel’s betrayal and her trust issues? What the people she cared most about in the world would think of her and Josh as a couple? His children and her fear of loving them only to lose them?

  Taking her hand, he brought it to his lips. “Start with whatever worries you the most.”

  “This.” She pointed to him, then herself. “Us. Together.”

  “Our relationship?”

  “Yes. No.” How to say it? She supposed the best way was straight to the point. “Intimacy.”

  “You think it’s easy for me because I’m a guy?”

  “I haven’t dated since my divorce. At all,” she emphasized.

  “Me, either.”

  “I’ve been divorced longer.”

  Josh’s brows rose. “Is that the problem? I haven’t been single as long? Because my marriage was over well before—”

  “It’s not that.” Not entirely.

  “My friends tell me, don’t ever talk about your past relationships with a woman. You’ll never say the right thing, and she’ll end up mad, hurt or jealous.”

  Cara raised an eyebrow. “You believe that?”

  “Kimberly will be a year old at the end of next month. For the record, she was conceived during a very brief few weeks when Trista and I attempted a Hail Mary reconciliation. That was also the last time I had sex.”

  Cara hated admitting it, but hearing his confession made her feel better.

  “How about some hot chocolate?” He stood.

  “What?”

  “You’re not ready yet, and I refuse to force myself on a woman.” He hauled her to her feet. “But make no mistake, I want you, Cara.” The hunger in his eyes left no doubt.

  “Okay.” She was...flattered. Men didn’t normally pursue her. At least, they hadn’t for a long time. And—this was crazy—she wanted Josh in return.

  “All I have is the instant hot chocolate from an envelope,” he said from the kitchen.

  Whew! They were back to making small talk. “Sounds great.”

  He’d just put two mugs of water in the microwave when the sound of crying traveled from the bedroom. Nathan, not Kimberly. Cara could easily distinguish between the two. She started to tell Josh, but then hesitated. Enough was enough. She wasn’t going to keep avoiding Nathan simply because he reminded her of Javier. He was only a boy, for crying out loud, and, at the moment, distressed.