Forever Red

by Carina Adams

  I pulled away from Billy to hug his best friend. “The groupies you can bring on now that I won’t be here?”

  “Fuck, I love your girl, Nate.” Rhett reached behind me, taking one last playful grab.

  Reb held out a box of gingersnap cookies, grinning at my scowl. “Just something to remind you of us.” He smirked. “And thanks to you, I now know what it looks like when a ginger actually snaps.” I shook my head, trying not to laugh at the stupid nickname that I knew they weren’t ever going to let me forget, and planted a kiss on his whiskered cheek.

  Noah was next. The lost puppy dog look on his face made me want to cry. I was going to miss him more than I could explain. He stepped into me, engulfing me as he pulled me into him. “The age difference never mattered to me,” he assured me as his hands palmed the back of my head. “Age is something that only matters when you are a cheese.”

  I pulled back, looking up into his face, laughing at the stupid saying.

  “God, I’m gonna miss you,” he added

  I nodded, completely agreeing. I cleared my throat. “I got you something.” Reaching into my duffle, I found the present and pulled it out. He raised a single eyebrow at me and tore the bag open; then he pulled the first part out. He tipped his head back, howling in laughter. “It’s to keep you company in your bunk,” I told him about the Betty Rubble plush doll.

  Shaking his head and handing Betty off to Reb, he tugged the tee shirt out of the bag and held it up. He laughed again as he read the front, “Betty Rubble or Die.” Immediately, he stripped off his own shirt and replaced it with the one I’d gotten him. “I’m never taking it off.”

  “Oh, God. Please do. I don’t want to have to do the sniff test on you next time I see you.”

  I went up on my toes and threw my arms around his neck. “I love you, kid.”

  He tensed, hands resting on my hips. “Love you, too, old lady.”

  Mike was flying home with me. Almost ten weeks ago, it had been his job to “grab” me. Now, it was his job to “drop” me. So that left just Neil.

  Mikey stood, reaching for one of my suitcases. “Let’s get the bags to the car.”

  Taking the not so subtle hint, they all grabbed a piece of luggage and headed down the steps and out the door. It was suddenly too quiet. Neil had been leaning against the refrigerator while I said goodbye to his bandmates, but he was watching me closely.

  “I’m not sure what to say.”

  He took two steps and was right in front of me. “Say you love me.”

  I stared. I hadn’t said those words to him in years. As true as they were, as much as I wanted to let go and tell him that I loved him more than I ever had, I was terrified. Sucking in a sharp breath, I closed my eyes and whispered, “I love you.”

  “So I’ll see you in two weeks?”

  My eyes popped open and I stared at him confused. “Ah… Um… You’re still coming up for Labor Day?”

  “Damn straight.” Dropping a quick kiss on my head, he cupped my cheek. “You couldn’t keep me away.” His thumb caressed my skin. “I love you, Red.” He moved his lips to my forehead, lingering there for a few minutes before he stepped back and swatted my ass. “If you don’t go now, you’ll never get out of here.”

  Molly was outside waiting. Rushing up to me, she gave me giant hug and a kiss.

  “Promise me you’ll take care of him.”

  “As much as he’ll let me.” She nodded, leaning in close to my ear. “Thank you.”

  I wasn’t sure what she meant or what I’d done to earn her gratitude, but I didn’t have time to ask. We needed to leave or we’d never make it through security in time to catch our flight. I gave her one more hug and then climbed in behind Mike.

  I wanted to go home. I missed my friends. I missed my apartment and my real job. I still cried all the way to the airport; I couldn’t shake the idea that this goodbye was final.

  We checked my bags and maneuvered through security without a hitch. Mikey didn’t bother me too much, letting me suffer in silence, and I appreciated that. Once we boarded, he handed me a set of headphones and an iPod. “Kelly told me to give this to you as soon as we got on the plane.”

  Curious, I slipped the ear-buds in and turned on the device. John Denver’s voice came through the speaker, singing the song I loved so much. I didn’t have to put it on repeat; it was the only song on it. Smiling, I leaned against the window and fell asleep.

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  ~ Nathaniel ~

  “This fuckin’ sucks, man!” Noah complained from his spot on the couch.

  “It’s worse than a fuckin’ hangover,” Reb agreed.

  Billy stopped thumping out a beat on the table long enough to turn around and suggest, “We could go out, grab a beer.”

  Rhett nodded. “We could.” He didn’t sound excited by the idea, though. “We could call Mols, see if she wants to come hang out.”

  There were three nods of agreement, but no one reached for their phone. We were collectively miserable, but none of us had the energy to do anything about it. It was typical to start getting burnt out toward the last few legs of a crazy busy tour. But this was the worst it had ever been. It had been like this since Red left on Sunday. We’d pull it together for the show, but our down time was spent moping.

  We’d rolled into Columbus earlier that afternoon, almost twenty-four hours ahead of schedule. Typically, when we were this early, Nikki – and then Lia once Nik left – would book us hotel rooms to get us off the damn bus. With them both gone, the responsibility fell to Rebel and me. We hadn’t bothered this time. It was a depressing, dreary day and none of us wanted to do a damn thing so we’d decided to be miserable together.

  Lia wouldn’t have let us just do nothing. No, she would have been on top of it and planned our entire evening from where we were going for dinner to which bars would be the least crowded and therefore the best to visit. If we’d decided we wanted to stay in, then she’d have takeout menus and movies ready. She was amazing, always taking care of us and knowing what we wanted before we did.

  The worst part about her being gone was how goddamn quiet it was. Not that she was loud. She wasn’t. She wasn’t a chick that talked just to hear her own voice. It was us – we’d been louder – boisterous even – when she was around. If she were here now, she’d be talking with Noah or debating about something stupid with Billy. Eventually, the rest of us would give our opinions and before we knew it, we’d be laughing and yelling. It was as if now that she was gone, we didn’t have much to talk about.

  In our pre-Lia days, we’d have been off this bus as soon as it stopped, doing a pub-crawl, each pulling some random groupie back to our hotel room in the middle of the night. I thought that once she was gone, they’d start that shit again, but none of them seemed interested. I didn’t know if it was because they knew I was lonely as fuck without her or if they were just over it.

  Ten weeks. A little over seventy days. That’s all it took for that woman to become such a big part of our group that we were lost without her. Reb was right; this was worse than a fucking hangover.

  We needed to cure this shit, and cure it fast. And the best way to do that was hair of the dog. I smiled to myself, lifting my phone and making plans.

  “Let’s go.”

  Billy stopped strumming again, looking at me confused. “I thought we decided not to go out for a beer.”

  “Not a beer.”

  Noah’s head came off the couch as he watched me.

  “Carson!” I turned, screaming down the hall where Mike was pouting in his bunk. “Get your ass out here.” I slid off the bench by the table and nodded at my little brother. “Go get changed.”

  “Where in the hell are we goin’?”

  “Y’all are going out. Y’all are gonna go have some laughs, drink too much, meet some girls, and have some fun.”

  “And you? What are you gonna do?”

  I glanced down at my phone, clicking the buy button before I looked at my li
ttle brother and smiled. “I’m going to see my girl.”

  *****

  I hadn’t told her I was coming. I had Sammy drop me off at the airport, took a direct flight to Boston, had a short layover, and then grabbed a commuter flight to Portland. I wasn’t sure how long it would take or even if I’d be able to make the original flight, so I hadn’t wanted to get her hopes up. But when the taxi dropped me off at her apartment at a little after eight, I had second thoughts.

  Pulling my cell out of my pocket, I glanced up at her window while the phone rang. “Hey, handsome!” her voice answered happily, melting away all apprehension of my surprise visit. “I was hoping you’d call before I headed to bed. You guys in Ohio?”

  “Nope.” I smiled. “Not yet. Should be there sometime tomorrow.”

  She groaned. “That sucks. You must be getting sick of that bus by now.”

  “How ‘bout you. You home?”

  “Yeah. I gave my classes a pre-test today to find out what they know and what they don’t. I just finished correcting them.” I walked around her building and into the entryway, pressing a ton of call buttons just like Noah had the first time we’d been here, not surprised when the door unlocked almost immediately.

  “Wow. Tests on the first day of school. You’re a hard ass.” I started taking the stairs, two at a time.

  “Yeah,” she scoffed. “That’s exactly what I am. We both know you only called so you could talk about my ass.”

  “I’d rather touch your ass than talk about it.” I made it to her floor and started toward her apartment.

  “I’m not having phone sex with you.” Her voice was full of humor.

  “Is your roommate home?” I asked, stopping at her door.

  She chuckled. “No, Cort’s gone. Still not having phone sex with you, Kelly.”

  I knocked on her door, pounding out a little beat.

  “Shit. Someone’s here. Hold on, I’m coming!” I heard her yell through the phone as well as through the door. Then, the door was open and I was standing face-to-face with the most beautiful woman on the planet.

  “Hi.” I stabbed the red button on my phone, ending the call and slipped it into my back pocket.

  The look of shock on her face was adorable. “Hi?” She parroted, not moving her own phone from her ear. “What are you doing here?”

  “I missed you.” I shrugged. “Can I come in?”

  She nodded, realizing she wasn’t imagining me. Then she stepped back and let me in, finally dropping her phone. “You have a show tomorrow.”

  “Yeah. I needed to see you tonight, though.”

  As soon as she closed the door, I grabbed the bottom of her tank top, lifting it over her head and letting it fall to the kitchen floor. My hands went to her bare breasts, cupping them and lifting them slightly. They were definitely not small, big enough to fit in the palm of my hand and still have a little extra spilling over.

  I moved my thumbs over her dark pink nipples, feeling both of them harden immediately. Fuck, I loved her tits. I loved every part of her body, but these were my favorite. Firm but unbelievably soft. I’d spent every night of the last few months holding them, massaging them.

  Lia moaned loudly when I leaned down, sucking one little tip into my mouth, closing my teeth around it slightly. She gasped, hands grasping the back of my head, fingernails digging into my scalp. I let go of one, nipping at the side of the other before circling the nipple with my tongue. Her hands gripped tighter, pulling my head closer to her body.

  “Cort,” she gasped. “Cort’s coming home.”

  I pulled back – even though she resisted – stood up, put my hands on her hips, and walked her backward into her bedroom. I didn’t waste a minute once the door was closed; my hand behind her neck, pulling her into me. I leaned down to her mouth, and at the last second when she thought I was going to put my lips to hers, I moved to her neck.

  My girl was feeling feisty, though, and before I realized what she was doing, she shoved me away, back into the wall next to her closet. I let her take control, only helping by yanking my shirt over my head. As soon as it was gone, her fingers explored my chest, stomach, and then they slipped under the edge of my jeans, pulling the button open and working on the zipper.

  Her mouth moved down my neck, tugging each of the curved barbells in my nipples with her teeth in turn, making my already hard dick strain against the material confining it. As her lips weaved a wet trail down the middle of my stomach, her fingers found their way into my boxers and closed around me.

  Her other hand shoved at my jeans until they fell around my feet, my boxers right behind them, and then she was on her knees, outlining my dick with her tongue. Fingers cupped my balls, massaging one and then the other as her head bobbed up and down, my tip hitting the back of her throat. I could feel my orgasm building, coming faster as she increased her pace.

  This was not what I had come here for. I craved her scent, her taste, the feel of her wrapped around my cock as it was buried deep inside her. I needed her beneath me, screaming my name.

  Finding strength I didn’t know I had, I pushed away from the wall, lifting her to her feet, stepping out of my jeans, and flipping us around, swapping our positions. Torturing her the way she had me, I started at her neck and worked my way down as my hands pushed her pajama pants down. My fingers slid into her, finding her soaking wet, just as turned on as I was. My thumb worked her clit as I kissed every inch of skin I could.

  I sank to my knees, lifting her leg over my shoulder, opening her up to me. I needed more. I needed to taste her as much as I needed to breathe. I normally would take my time, building up to the moment I rocked my partner’s world. Not today.

  I wasn’t giving Lia the chance to deny me. As soon as my tongue moved between her folds, though, she bucked and yelped in surprise, shoving against my shoulders.

  “Neil!”

  I had a taste, though, and didn’t want to stop. She was delicious, salty, but incredible. This was ten times better than kissing her. And kissing her was my favorite thing to do. “I love you, Red. Please don’t make me stop.”

  The next time she said my name, it was being gasped and her hands were in my hair again, yanking it hard enough to pull me bald. Listening to her come apart made my tongue swirl against her quicker, fingers moving into her at lightning speed.

  “Oh, my God. I can’t… I just can’t. Oh, my God. Neil!” she cried, her leg shaking. I knew she was close, and as much as I wanted to finish her this way, I couldn’t wait. I stood quickly, moving her leg to my hip, grabbing her ass, and lifting her before shoving into her.

  Her arms went around my shoulders, holding me close as I set a quick pace. My mouth covered hers, swallowing her screams, giving her my moans. It was unlike anything I’d ever felt before, like warm velvet engulfing me. She tightened around me as her orgasm hit, her pussy milking my cock, and I couldn’t wait. For the first time since forever, I didn’t have control of my dick.

  I thrust over and over, giving her every last drop of me, pulling every ounce from her.

  “Holy fuck.” I leaned my forehead on hers, exhausted. It had never been like that. Not with anyone.

  She giggled. “Holy fuck.”

  My hands held the bottoms of her thighs. “I’m gonna move back,” I slid out, lowering her to the floor, and turned away to take care of the condom. Both of our eyes hit my bare dick at the same time. “Fuck,” I muttered, turning back to her.

  She swallowed, eyes wide. Then she shook her head. “It’s okay. It’s fine. I’m good. As long as you’re clean…” She trailed off, eyes getting even wider if that was possible. “You are clean, right?”

  I nodded vigorously. “I’ve never done that, but I was just tested a few months ago and haven’t been with anyone but you since.”

  She visibly relaxed and then smiled, holding out a hand. “I need you to take me to bed.” Then her smile turned naughty. “And tell me why I waited so long to do that.”

  “That’s easy,” I
assured her, scooping her up and falling onto the mattress, “you were waiting for me.”

  *****

  The alarm went off too early the next morning. I didn’t want to move and I really didn’t want to make the very naked Lia get off my chest. I was trying to figure out how to steal time and spend the day in bed with her when she lifted her head and looked at the clock.

  “Fuck! I overslept!” She jumped off me, rolled to the side of the bed, and grabbed a robe from the back of her desk chair. Glancing at me over her shoulder, she smiled. “I’ve gotta jump in the shower. Wanna come?”

  Hell, yeah I did. But she was late, and if I joined her, we’d be in there for hours. I really couldn’t miss my flight to Boston or I’d never make my connection and I’d miss the concert. “Rain check?”

  She gave me another smile and left the room, closing the door behind her. I stretched, dreading the world outside of this room. I rolled to my side, seeing the picture on her nightstand for the first time. I plucked it, pulling it closer to my face. Three teenagers that I hadn’t seen in a very long time smiled back at me: one lanky kid, the other tall and bulky with his arms wrapped around the most beautiful redhead in the world.

  We were so young it was almost painful to see. Baby-faced and naïve. It had been taken after one of my football games senior year, when we thought we’d looked mature and were all grown up. Ha! Thinking back to all the shit we’d seen and done in high school always embarrassed me. I’d really thought I was so grown up.

  Such a difference to now when, at thirty, I didn’t feel mature at all. I certainly wasn’t mature enough to be this old. I didn’t want to make adult decisions or act like a grown up. But then? Yeah, I’d been all about it.

  I put the photo back where it belonged and took another look around. The top of the bureau was full of more frames. I stood, finding my boxers and jeans and tugged them on before going to see what other windows into Lia’s life I could find.