Training, Daddy

by M. C. Cerny

  “Oh, I had to switch to formula this week because the little vampires suck me dry. I think Milo is the only one disappointed by this.” Piper refills her glass and tops mine off.

  “Poor Milo.” I mutter trying not to think about my best friend and her husband getting it on like a normal happy married couple. The last time I had sex was before Maisy was born. Allen wasn’t interested when I was pregnant making his revulsion obvious and afterwards, well his cheating and Maisy’s cancer made sex a sure thing that was not going to happen.

  “Yes, poor me, what are we lamenting now?” Milo carries a platter of steaks with Jax on his heels. Jax holds a beer and little Dmitri who is wrapped up like a burrito against his Uncle. It’s overwhelmingly adorable and I gulp my wine to keep from saying so. I don’t think I’ve been buzzed since my wedding reception.

  “Only my breasts.” Piper says.

  I cough and she whacks me on the back on auto pilot.

  “Pip.” Jax groans.

  “Oh please, it’s not as if you haven’t seen them before.” She waves the guys off, but Milo pauses looking at his wife and then at Jax while he’s got the tongs holding up a steak.

  “Hmm.” Milo hums.

  Our friendship has no boundaries whatsoever. It’s disturbing and yet normal.

  “Dude, no way.” Jax tries to save himself looking equally embarrassed.

  “Breastfeeding?” Milo asks non-pulsed.

  “Of course!” Piper looks insulted and Milo shrugs.

  “We have a separate room set up at the gym.” Jax informs Milo who has already walked away nonplused. Piper’s taken to motherhood surprisingly well. I’ve seen my friend topless breastfeeding more times than I thought possible. Although as a former personal trainer it’s not like her body ever had anything to hide. Unlike myself who has a scar my ex-husband used to remind me of daily after Maisy’s birth. Apparently, I couldn’t even give birth right according to him. I push the depressing thought back. I need to let the past go. I want to, and yet I can’t every time I turn around and I’m thrust into another social situation.

  “I know, but I also know my lovely wife.” Milo leans down to kiss her forehead as well as baby Danika who looks up cooing adoringly at her father.

  “I’m glad you’re well aware of her craziness, Milo.” I tip my wine glass back. He laughs kindly in a way that only husbands can do without getting kicked.

  “Just wait until you have more, Diana.” Milo grins.

  “Uh, no. I’m okay with Maisy. We’re a good team.” I can’t even remember the baby days with my daughter. I spent so many of them tired up in knots with worry over her health and wellbeing. The thought of another, well I just couldn’t fathom that. Not with my ex starting up his phone calls and Maisy finally getting her clearance for remission.

  Piper points at me, “You know Milo is something of a gypsy predicting these things. You best be careful, Di.” Her husband flushes and I wonder if this is his foreign juju at work.

  Babies?

  Huh.

  I couldn’t manage dating when I tried.

  I’d need a guy for the baby making part and since my marriage ended there hasn’t been a contender to help out with the creation side of things. Heck, even my vibrator was so old it no longer had a valid warranty.

  Personally, I was looking forward to peace or the most peace I could find right now, not a DNA donor for something I wasn’t sure I could handle anyway.

  “Babies are fun momma, I want one.” The little voice I love so much it hurts pipes up from the living room playing with dolls.

  “Yeah, Diana.” Jax smirks at me and I decide to get him good at our next training session. Holding Dmitri he looks like he’s training for parenthood lifting the baby like a barbell. Well, he’d have to find some other girl as a candidate because it was not going to be me. Training Jax to be a daddy wouldn’t be my job.

  Six

  Jax

  “Why is there a brand new Audi Quattro in your parking spot?” Piper slaps my back forcing me to turn around from the weight bench.

  “Huh?” I pretend to not hear her.

  “You heard me Hulk. Why is there a soccer mom vehicle in your spot? Where is the Mach one?”

  I huff and smile. “The mustang is in the garage and I wanted something a little more…” I don’t know what I wanted, but the one day Diana needed to pick up Maisy, I couldn’t because a car seat wouldn’t fit in my car.

  “What the heck is going on between you and Diana?” It’s been weeks since we had dinner at her house and she’s brining this up now. Luckily the slap is more of a bee sting, annoying but harmless. I knew first hand her punches could pack a wallop.

  “Nothing. You asked me to train her and I am.” I have no idea where this going but watching her pace back and forth puts a knot in my stomach. She’s plotting. Piper is always plotting.

  “I saw you at dinner making eyes at her.” Piper pouts as if this hadn’t been in her plan the entire time.

  “Weeks ago?” She attempted to scare me away and then lure me in. I couldn’t keep up with her. I’d blame her hormonal changes since the babies with her hot and cold behavior, but that was sexist and not true. Piper has always been funny about guys around Diana.

  I roll my eyes.

  She points at me, “Not those eyes. I saw the googly you want her type of eyes.”

  “I was holding the baby most of the night.” I wipe down the bar and get ready to lift the weights again.

  “Don’t bring my son into this.”

  “Okay, I won’t and for the record, can we not bring your breasts into every conversation?” Dinner had been awkward enough and I happily gave up the shared office for her to breastfeed if it left me in peace. Now I gave it up so she could change the little poop makers.

  “Pfft. You’re so uptight.”

  “Yeah, well it’s weird seeing my best friend’s breasts no matter how long we’ve known each other, and then you blabbing to your husband about it. We’re not exactly having an easy bromance right now since you were popping those puppies out left and right.” I motion toward her chest waving them away. Far away if possible, but Piper dramatically throws her hands up in the air ignoring me.

  “No more worries on that since my adorable little vampires are getting formula now. I bet you wouldn’t mind seeing Diana’s.”

  Of course I wouldn’t mind, but that wasn’t the point and I definitely wasn’t divulging that information to her.

  “Oh god, I have a client in five minutes.” I groan, “Woman, please leave me alone.” I adjust my stance because the mere mention of her name has me sprouting a chubby leaving me rather uncomfortable.

  “Jax and Diana sitting in a tree…”

  “Seriously? You do realize that for the last oh decade or so you chased me off her tail.” I’m frustrated beyond my limit and Piper continues to sing the song tormenting me.

  “First comes love.”

  “No.” Well, maybe.

  “A baby carriage.”

  Images of minivans and soccer balls torment me as does the new car payment for the Audi in the parking lot.

  I grumble. “She doesn’t even want more kids.”

  “Wait. What? She talked about this?” Piper stops singing only to interrogate me further. It’s like a red light stopped her precious thoughts leaving me with the chaos left over.

  “At dinner. She implied at dinner she didn’t want more kids.”

  “And this bothers you?”

  “No.” Yes. I don’t know. I hadn’t honestly given any of this thought until it was forced my way. Now I can’t stop thinking about the possibility with a woman who isn’t into me nearly as much as I’m into her after weeks of being forced into close quarters and physical contact training her. It sucks.

  “Jax?”

  “Well, maybe a little. Kids aren’t a deal breaker, but if I got into a relationship, I kind of thought it would happen someday.”

  Piper smiles, grins actually from ear to ear and I g
roan dreading the conversation.

  “So you have thought about it.”

  Not until Piper jack-knifed it into the conversation.

  “Piper, let it go. Please.”

  “Maybe.”

  “You’re not going to let this go, are you?” She wasn’t. I knew her well enough that this was going to be the highlight of her week, maybe month.

  “Is this why you bought a new car and put your baby into storage?”

  “Fuck, Pip. I plead the fifth. You threatened my balls if anything happened.” I cover my junk worried she might follow through anyway.

  “Huh, that was before you went and bought a car worth forty grand to fit car seats inside of it.”

  “You looked!” I accuse her.

  “No, but you just confirmed it big guy.” She winks.

  I did. I fell right into her trap.

  “It gets good gas mileage you know. Maybe you and Milo should check one out.”

  She husks raising her eyebrows. “If you say so, Jax.”

  “Did you have anything else you wanted to torture me with, Piper.”

  “I need you to babysit for Milo and me this weekend.”

  “What? Why? Where are you going?”

  “I made him promise to take me to Solomon’s Island for a little grown up date night.”

  “You’re going to get knocked up again.” I joke. Solomon’s Island is their little adult getaway and magic baby making place an hour south outside the city. I refused to be jealous. Diana and I were friends. Only friends.

  “I know. I’m counting on it.” Piper smirks like she’s holding a secret. Her happiness is infectious; I just wish I could have a tiny piece of it as well.

  “Fine, I’ll do it.”

  “Great. By the way, Diana will be there too.”

  Wait? What?

  Seven

  Diana

  “Okay, there’s formula and diapers and extra burp cloths in the closet in their bedroom.” Piper is pacing back and forth as I get there and Milo is trying to pull her out of the house and into the car.

  “Love, it will be fine. We’ll be gone hours, not days.” Milo tries to reassure her as I walk up the steps holding Maisy’s hand in mine. “Will you please tell my wife the twins will survive while we’re gone for a few hours?”

  “The twins will survive, now get out you two.” Jax emerges from the kitchen with two bundles cradled against his chest and I want to melt into the floor like a puddle.

  “Mr. Jax.” My daughter skips and hugs his legs with her little arms barely reaching around them. They look silly, a man so big and a girl so tiny hanging on trusting him with everything she’s got. It should have been her dad, but that’s a lost cause and Jax competently fills in the should of, would of, could of better than Allen ever will.

  “Hey little wonder.” Yeah, his nickname for my daughter is Wonder Woman and I melt a little more every time he says it.

  “We’re babysitting tonight.” She eagerly bounces around the kitchen.

  “Yes we are and pizza is on its way.” He smiles.

  “Yay!” Maisy runs for the living room and helps herself to the television currently streaming cartoons on Nickelodeon.

  “Are you guys sure this okay?” Piper nibbles her lip with a worried expression. I don’t think I’ve seen this side of my best friend before, uncertain and so maternal. It’s a refreshing change and payback.

  I grab my friend’s hands squeezing them gently. “Piper Jane, this was your idea. You’re going. Don’t you trust us?” I toss the words back her she gave me a few months ago and watch the emotions war across her face. Serves her right, not that I want her to feel bad, I just want her to understand a little of where I’m coming from. Mom guilt is a real phenomenon.

  I can tell she totally gets it when she responds with, “You are an awful wicked friend, Diana Valentine.” She grouses.

  Milo grins behind her putting his hands on her shoulders easing her out of the house. His voice lowers and tugs, “Come wife. The babes will be fine. I need you.”

  Sweet jealously fills me, happy for them.

  “Have fun storming the castle!” Jax shouts after them and I recognize the quote from one of my favorite movies. He’s pretty much my own Wesley these days when he’s not being the dreaded Pirate Roberts in our training sessions and I sigh shutting the door behind me.

  “So how did you get coaxed into watching the babies?” I ask leaning on the counter watching him strap the babies into their matching bouncer seats that have been bolted into the granite counter tops. That was probably Milo’s doing, or Piper. I couldn’t decide which one of them was crazy enough to do it.

  “Probably the same as you, utter guilt and shaming, but I’m happy to do it. Besides we won’t be terribly outnumbered and Maisy loves to help. She could sit and feed one on the couch later.” He wipes down the counter and pulls out dishes for the coming pizza.

  “She does excel at that.” I chuckle.

  “You know she basically told me I had to stay away from you or lose any potential of procreation later on as an adult.” Jax smirks.

  “She did not!”

  “She did.”

  “And yet she trusts us alone to babysit.” I muse.

  “Well, we’re not horny teens waiting for their parents to leave the house.”

  I swallow hard thinking about sneaking around with Jax. Is that what we’d been doing these past few weeks? “No. No, I guess not.”

  “And yet, isn’t that what we’ve been doing.”

  My eyes shot up to Jax’s face and he’s standing at the counter arms bulging and crossed against his chest.

  “Uh…”

  “Come on. We know Piper is nutty as they come, but that’s why we love her. She’s been orchestrating this the whole time and now its backfired in her face.”

  My face heats and I think about our training sessions and now we’re here in the house together, alone. I trust Jax, but can I trust myself?

  “Hey, Di, I mean it in the best way. I enjoy training you to kick ass.”

  Maisy runs into the kitchen. “Butt! You said butt! That’s a dollar Mr. Jax.”

  “Maisy!” I scold her but it’s really me I’m scolding. Jax has put out on the table what we’ve been dancing around this entire time and now we can’t avoid it.

  “You’re right, little wonder. Here’s a dollar for the jar.” Jax slips a dollar bill from his wallet into Maisy’s greedy little hand who scampers off to leave us back to adult conversations and raging hormones.

  I lean into the counter for support. “So what do you propose we do about this?” My heart races and my blood sings with curiosity that’s been playing at the edges of my desire for this man. For the first time, I’m considering jumping in head first without a life preserver to see where this goes. Last time I did that, I got married to the first boy who came around who left me high and dry. I’m taking a risk but I think I can do it.

  “I was hoping…” before Jax can finish Danika wakes up whimpering and we’re on baby duty for the next few hours.

  Time blurs as we change, feed, clean, change again, and snuggle two little demons into slumber. No wonder Milo and Piper needed a night out. Even with one, I didn’t remember it ever being like that nonstop and I did it alone.

  “Jax, why don’t you and Maisy set up the movie?”

  “Are you sure?” He says watching me as I rock Danika in my arms. I think she might be colicky and I rub her back. I can let Milo and Piper know when they get home. The baby is fine and the need the night out while I need to snuggle this little baby.

  “Perfectly. I kind of miss this.”

  He looks at me funny. “You do?”

  I shrug, “Yeah. It’s not always like this and the snuggle years vanish all too quickly.”

  He nods and we don’t get to finish our conversation because as soon as the twins are out, I return to the living room to find my daughter has crawled her way up Jax’s chest hugging him in her sleep. The movie credit
s scroll and I click the remote off watching them snore lightly.

  It’s bittersweet.

  Eight

  Jax

  “Hey sleepyhead.” A soft voice rouses me and I open my eyes slowly. A little warm body is wrapped around me, too tiny to be Diana. It’s Maisy and my chest burns with fiercely protective emotions I hadn’t expected.

  “I guess we conked out, huh?” My voice is gruff and Diana picks up Maisy kissing her head.

  “Right through the credits.”

  “Hey, if she put on an action movie, I swear it wasn’t me.”

  Diana laughs shaking her head. “No. You’re all good. I’m going to put her in her bed Piper keeps for her.”

  Diana takes Maisy and I get up from the couch to help her if needed. I watch her tuck in her daughter and wonder if I have a place in their lives. I want to have a place. I want to rank somewhere up there as someone important to Diana.

  “Exhausting isn’t it?” I comment as she shuts the light off slipping out of the room.

  She looks up at me and whispers, “But so worth it.”

  I agree with her. She’s worth it.

  I trail after her into the kitchen when she checks her cellphone.

  “Anything good?” I open the fridge for a bottled water.

  “Milo says Piper calmed down after three glasses of wine and to not wait up.” She scrolls through messages as I chug my water.

  I toss the empty into the recycling. “Only three?”

  “She is so getting pregnant again.” She murmurs.

  “We should make a bet on it. Twenty bucks?”

  “Deal.” She puts her phone down on the counter but I feel like the change in room temperature isn’t from the air conditioning that’s kicked on.

  “What is it, Di?”

  Her lips purse in a sour face. “Nothing.”

  “Don’t start that.” I press her. I can’t begin something with her if she’s not honest with me about where her head is at or what she wants.