Rock and Roll High School: Growing Up in Hollywood During the Decade of Decadence

by Marisa Tellez

  Aside from trying to keep an eye on Faye and maintaining my “relationship” with Sebastian, things were changing up in the Martel Estates. Sebastian was moving out of Angela’s and into another apartment on Fuller and Hawthorn with Susie and her friend Deven.

  CHRIS PENKETH ( Swingin Thing): When Sunny and I left the Martel Estates, we moved in with a girl named Gabby. We were so stokedtohave our owncouchspace.We were like,“Fuckyeah,this is awesome!” The very next day, there’s a knock on the door and Gabby’sslaveansweredthedoorbecauseshewasadominatrix.Soher slave opens the door,andit’sMichaelMichelle withafewother guys. I was like, “What the fuck are you guys doing here?” And Michael said,“Gabbysaidwe couldstayhere for twoweeks.” AndGabbywas like, “Yeah, it’s okay, I told them they could stay for two weeks.” Sunny and me were like, “Nooooooo! We finally got our own space!” Because inHollywood“twoweeks” meant INDEFINITELY.

  If someone found a place, then everyone who needed a place to staywouldhear about it. Thenextthingyouknow,therewouldbeten people in a one-bedroom apartment, so you had to enjoy your space whileyouhadit.

  The dynamic between Sebastian and I changed drastically when he moved into the apartment on Fuller. Adding to the tension was a new girl that entered our little circle named Bronwyn.

  Bronwyn was about a year younger than me. She had long, wavy blonde hair, pasty skin, and blue eyes. Like a bunch of bloodhounds, the girls in our group immediately pounced, sniffed, and observed the intentions of this newbie. She had entered our circle through Robbie, the drummer from Alley Cat Scratch. Within a few short weeks, she had moved from Robbie to his singer Michael, and my skeezer radar went flying off the charts.

  Although she was playing musical chairs with the boys in our circle, she didn’t look like the typical groupie. She wore these long, cloaky, witchlike dresses that covered her entire body. She wasn’t outwardly sexual either. She seemed to be fairly quiet and very soft spoken.

  Shortly after her fling with Michael ended, I found her phone number written on the back of a Kids flyer, lying on the floor by Sebastian’s bed. I immediately took it and flushed it down the toilet, but of course that wasn’t the end of that. It wasn’t long before I noticed her show great interest in Sebastian. They would chat it up like old friends at every party we went to while he’d still instigate fights with me over the dumbest shit. I confronted him about his new found “friendship” with Bronwyn, and of course he denied anything was going on. Anytime she was around me, she would always smile and say hi to me in a sheepish way. I on the other hand, would shoot her the look of death and walk right past her.

  But Bronwyn wasn’t the only new addition to our dysfunctional little group. A childhood friend of Bam’s named Dresden had recently moved to L.A. from New York.

  Dresden stood just over six foot tall. He had short black hair with the exception of the long red bangs that hung just below his chin. He had dark brown eyes and a chiseled face. He reminded me a little bit of Johnny Depp, except with a New York accent.

  As the weeks passed and Dresden continued to hang out in our little circle, I noticed he was nice to everyone with the exception of me. He would downright ignore me, and I couldn’t understand why. We never had an actual conversation before, so it’s not like I could’ve said something to piss him off. I’d overhear him having conversations with people and would hold back my snickering over the funny things he’d say. I found it so frustrating that I couldn’t partake in his sense of humor, which seemed very much like mine.

  With another weekend approaching, I was looking for something fun to do. I had gotten into a minor tiff with Sebastian the night before, so I decided to call Cassidy. She told me not to let Sebastian get to me and invited me to go with her and the girls to Pixie’s 18th birthday party in Calabasas. I happily accepted her invitation.

  In an attempt to make things copasetic with Sebastian, I decided to call him and see if he was going to Pixie’s. He said he was and that he wanted us to go together. I told him I was waiting on a ride from Dina and Amie, who were running a little bit late. Aside from picking me up, they also had to stop and get Cassidy too, so I told him it might be a while till I could get to his place. He got pissed off, told me to have fun with the girls, and promptly hung up on me. Lovely.

  Amie and Dina finally picked me up, and we sped off to Cassidy’s. Emily and Kennedy were hanging out in the living room when we got there, so we all had a round of drinks then piled into Amie’s little white sedan. Kennedy, Dina, and Amie rode in back, I sat on Cassidy’s lap in the passengers seat, and Emily drove.

  We passed around drinks in the car and caterwauled all the way to Calabasas to random songs on the radio like Sophie B. Hawkins “Damn, I Wish I Was Your Lover”. We were halfway through “Head Like a Hole” by Nine Inch Nails when Emily made a sharp turn onto Topanga Canyon, almost slamming us into the white pearly gates of Pixie’s driveway. Based on the size of the estate, it was easy to see that Pixie’s parents were rich. She lived in a huge white mansion with big white pillars. At the front of the house was a circular driveway with a beautiful fountain in the center. To me it looked more like a small hotel.

  We peeled ourselves out of Amie’s car and made our way to the back of the house, where we found a pool and a guest house with it’s own built in barbecue just outside it’s front doors.

  There was a good amount of people there when we arrived. Mostly regulars like Mandie, Vaughn, Strange, Sunny, and Chris to name a few. Sebastian was also there. I noticed him off in a corner talking with Dresden. Dresden’s eyes widened as I walked up to them. He shook his head and walked away as if he knew there was going to be trouble. Sebastian glanced over to me and didn’t look happy to see me.

  “What’s up your ass?” I asked.

  “Nothing,” he said with his arms crossed.

  “Are you mad?”

  “No. Why would I be mad?”

  “Well, you hung up on me that’s why.”

  “I’m fine, why? What’s wrong with you? Are you drunk like

  the rest of your girlfriends?”

  “Maybe I am. Is that a problem?”

  “No, but I guess I better catch up then,” he said walking

  away from me. I rolled my eyes and Pixie walked up to me just as Sebastian walked away. She asked if I wanted a drink and a tour of the house. I said yes to both and followed her away from the party. When we walked inside her house, she locked the door behind us because her parents didn’t want anyone in the house during the party. We walked to her kitchen where she made me a delicious cocktail and proceeded to show me around her humongous home.

  We went upstairs and walked out onto her bedroom balcony, which overlooked the entire party. As I scanned the crowd to see who else had shown up, I noticed Bronwyn standing by the pool talking to Sebastian. I was pissed and told Pixie I wanted to go back to the party. I finished the last of my strong cocktail, and we made our way back outside.

  By the time we walked outside, I decided not to make a spectacle and instead made myself another drink. When I finished that cocktail, I was too drunk to care what Sebastian was doing. I ignored him the rest of the night until some of our riff raff friends got caught breaking into Pixie’s house. Her folks got pissed and told everyone the party was over.

  I walked to the front of the house to find Amie’s car, but it was nowhere to be found. Also missing was Emily, who nobody had seen in the last hour. Some of the girls scattered into different cars, and I didn’t know what the hell I was going to do until Sebastian came up behind me and told me to come with him. We piled into his roommate Deven’s car, along with Amie, Dina, and Bam. I was still pissed off that he had been hanging out with Bronwyn earlier, but he was being nice on the way home, so I decided not to start a fight.

  A few weeks later, Courtney, one of the other rich girls, was having a party at her parent’s mansion in Malibu. The girls wanted to carpool together, but in an attempt to mend the recent tension with Sebastian, I asked him if he wanted to go toge
ther. So we ended up going with Cassidy in her car along with Dresden, who she had just started dating.

  Courtney’s house was incredible and even bigger than Pixie’s. She had tennis courts and an indoor pool. The absolute works. I couldn't imagine growing up like that, a lot of us couldn't. I was still living in the house I grew up in, and it certainly didn’t look anything like Courtney or Pixie’s that’s for damn sure.

  After watching a few drunken tennis matches between Sebastian and Mandie, I walked inside to use the bathroom. Upon stumbling around and trying to find a restroom, I noticed Michael and Strange sniffing around the kitchen. I ignored them and continued my way down a long hallway where I finally found a bathroom. As I made my way back out to the tennis courts, I passed the kitchen again and noticed Strange help Michael into a dumbwaiter. Strange packed in a few items of food with Michael and lowered him down to the garage. I rolled my eyes and continued walking outside.

  I was sitting outside with the girls having drinks when a few more of the guys went into the house and didn’t come back out. I just hoped they weren’t doing what I thought they were doing. Sure enough, when we all left about an hour or so later, the trunks of everyone’s cars looked like they were on their way to a Goodwill drive. I felt bad about the food that got looted from Courtney’s until I got sidetracked by a fight with Sebastian on the way home.

  He was pissed that I had become good friends with everyone in our little circle, not just the girls. Suddenly everyone was calling me with plans to go out. I’d even find out things before he did. When we first started dating, it was always him who called the shots on what we did each weekend. But now that we were on an even playing field, well he obviously wasn’t happy about that.

  “Who cares who finds out first? In the end, you and I are going to end up doing the same thing anyway,” I said.

  “You know how weird it is, when I'm getting ready to go out and you're already there, knowing everything that’s supposed to happen for the night?”

  “You should be happy I get along with everyone.”

  “It's like you're not even my girlfriend anymore. You're just another one of the girls that hangs out in the crowd now.”

  Oh so NOW I find out I’m his girlfriend? Great.

  What the hell was I supposed to do? There was no ulterior motive in me becoming friends with everyone. It just sort of happened, especially with the girls. We were all around the same age, and they really were just a lot of fun to hang out with. I couldn’t help that I immediately bonded with them. Nonetheless, over the next few weeks I continued trying to appease Sebastian by letting him choose what we did on the weekends, but of course even that didn't make him happy. I soon stopped making any effort with Sebastian, and he didn’t seem to care the more Bronwyn hung around. I could see we were heading down the break up path, and there was nothing I could do to stop it, so I focused on my friendship with Cassidy and the girls. I figured it was only a matter of time before Sebastian and I would be kaput, and I’d be in desperate need of some serious girl time.

  It was Saturday night when Cassidy called and asked why I hadn’t come out with Dina and Amie, who were on their way to her house. I told her I’d gotten into another stupid fight with Sebastian the night before and had planned on staying home since I was in a bad mood. She told me she hadn’t planned on going out that night and that I should come over to her place and have drinks with the girls. That sounded like a plan to me, so I borrowed my dad’s truck and made my way out to Cassidy’s.

  As I pulled up to Cassidy’s, I noticed Sebastian’s truck was pulling out of her driveway. I know Sebastian saw me, but he didn’t say hi to me.

  When I walked into the house, Dizzy and Vaughn were sitting at the kitchen table playing a board game called Pass Out while Cassidy stood at the kitchen counter setting up her home style lemon drops.

  A normal lemon drop usually has vodka, lemon juice, and sugar mixed in a shot glass. Cassidy’s consisted of a large plate of sugar, a bowl of sliced lemons, and a bottle of vodka with a stack of shot glasses. I was feeling anxious from just seeing Sebastian, so I helped myself to a lemon drop and took a seat at the kitchen table. I mentioned I had just seen Sebastian pulling out of her driveway and asked what he was doing there. Cassidy said he came to pick up Dresden and Mandie for a little get together at his place. I was hurt that he was having people over and didn’t think to invite me. Dizzy must’ve noticed the distraught look on my face too because he immediately grabbed me by the shoulders, shook me, and said not to let Sebastian have that effect on me. About a half hour later, Sebastian called Cassidy’s house and asked to talk to me.

  “So are you coming over with everyone else?” he asked rather annoyed.

  I decided to play dumb.

  “Coming over where?” I asked.

  “To my place. Where else?”

  “How would I know you’re having people over? You didn’t invite me until now, and nobody here mentioned they were going to your house.” I said casually.

  “Oh. Well if you guys want to come over you can.”

  “Let me see what everyone here wants to do. I’m sure we’ll end up going over.”

  “Well excuse me if you’re too cool to come over here then,” he said with a bitchy tone and hung up on me.

  The lemon drop wasn’t working on calming my feelings of anxiety, so I decided to do another. I dipped the lemon wedge into the mound of sugar, threw back a shot of vodka, and battled with my conflicting thoughts as I chewed on the lemon wedge. I knew deep down it wasn’t a good idea for me to go to Sebastian’s. But on the other hand, I didn’t give a shit if it went badly. Things had been dragging out between us for long enough. I was sick of being stuck in an emotional limbo. I just wanted some sort of resolve either way, and I didn’t care how it happened. So once Dina and Amie arrived, they squeezed themselves into the front cab of my dad’s truck, along with Cassidy, and I drove us to Sebastian’s.

  When we walked into Sebastian’s, there were only a handful of people there. Mostly the regulars like Ronnie, Bam, Mandie, and Dresden, along with a few randoms I didn’t know and to my disgust, Bronwyn.

  The moment I saw her, my claws came out. Not wanting to cause a scene, I immediately turned on my heels and went to the kitchen where Cassidy was already setting up lemon drops. I turned my back to the living room and threw back the first shot she set up. I knew damn well Sebastian saw me walk in with the girls, but he didn’t come to the kitchen to say hi to me. He just stayed on the couch chatting with Dina and Amie, who joined him in the living room.

  About an hour and three lemon drops later, I finally turned around to face the living room and noticed Sebastian and Bronwyn were gone. I knew they hadn’t left because the kitchen was right near the front door, so I would’ve seen them walk out. My heart raced. There’s NO WAY in HELL Sebastian would humiliate me like that in front of our friends.

  I walked around the small apartment, checking both bedrooms and the balcony. The only closed door was the main bathroom. I was immediately sick to my stomach. That’s when I knew all the paranoid thoughts I had for the last few weeks weren’t my anxiety anymore, and I wondered how long Sebastian had been cheating on me with Bronwyn.

  I went back to the kitchen to vent my frustrations to Cassidy. I’d been bitching to her for no more than five minutes when Bronwyn and Sebastian came out of the bathroom. I was beyond livid. I glared at Sebastian as he walked out of the bathroom, but he wouldn’t make eye contact with me. He just walked over to the couch and started talking to Mandie as if nothing were wrong while Bronwyn walked off to the side and adjusted the cloak she was wearing. I caught a view of her buffalo butt and realized that’s why she always wore those big cloaks.

  CASSIDY: I don’tremembermuchofBronwynbecauseshenever talked. I only remember she had a big fat ass, wore big dresses and hadgoodhair.Shewasbuiltlikea pear.

  A few minutes later, Sebastian walked up to me and told me we needed to talk. So we walked out onto the balcony and close
d the sliding glass door behind us.

  “You better tell the girls to back off,” he said.

  “Excuse me?”

  “They've been shooting dirty looks to Bronwyn since you

  guys got here.”

  “I didn’t tell the girls to do anything, and who gives a SHIT

  about Bronwyn.” I said coldly.

  “I told Dina if her and the girls didn't stop their bullshit, I

  would never speak to you again.”

  I was seething. Why did he care so much about what

  happened to Bronwyn? Fuck her, oh that’s right he probably just

  did.

  “You know what? Fuck you and fuck her! I don’t need this

  shit!” I yelled.

  I stomped to the balcony door, slammed it open and

  slammed it closed right behind me as I continued stomping into

  the apartment. Sebastian flung the balcony door back open. “Fuck you for slamming my patio door!” he yelled. “FUCK YOU FOR BANGING THAT WHORE IN THE

  BATHROOM!” I screamed back.

  I couldn’t believe those words came out of my mouth. It’s

  safe to assume by the shocked look on everyone’s faces, that

  they were more surprised than me. Cassidy immediately came up

  to me, told me to calm down, and that we should just go back to

  her house. I wholeheartedly agreed and walked towards the front

  door.

  “If anyone wants a ride back to Cassidy's, I’m leaving

  NOW!” I yelled.

  In addition to the girls, a stampede of footsteps followed